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"I always dreamed of a solemn face,
Someone who feels like a holiday,
But now I'm in pieces, barely believing,
Starting to think that I've lost all feeling,
You came out the blue on a rainy night, no lie,
I tell you how I almost died, while you're bringing me back to life."
+*+*+*
WORD COUNT: 1868.
Lolled across the couch, Taehyung was scrolling through his mobile's gallery. Viewing the tapes, he and y/n had captured together or some which he had taken stealthily. Films of when they were cooking together with half of the kitchen smeared in flour and cream. Reels of when they were watering the plants jointly but ended up creating their own little downpour with none of their green friends irrigated. Motion pictorials of watching movies mutually or more accurately, planning strategies to steal and hole up the remote so the other is compelled to watch, whatever is playing with tickling being an invariable that followed.
But out of all these the one which gave him incalculable flashes of how much he missed her, how lacking he felt with her not around, was the memory of when they had once sneaked into the school library late at night.
*Flashback*
"Tae!!!!! What if we get caught. Let's go back." She whispered.
"No! you scaredy cat. We are going in there and YOU (pointing his forefinger at her) my dear are going to read me a snippet of my favourite book." He tamped down.
Taehyung had everything arranged as if he had planned this all along and that he had. He was prepared from the A to the Z, starting with the ladders to the lattes, he had it all under control. Their first late night library date concealed under the game of truth and dare, challenging the fate of their chances of ever being in a real relationship.
The library was pitch black with the only light making things perceptible was the moonlight. The shaft of light infiltrating through the huge French windows was tittivating the dark archive with its luminosity. The library was quiet all the time but tonight it unraveled a new level of tranquil. It was soothing and nerve relaxing.
They sneaked in from an open window which Taehyung had deviously left ajar when leaving the library that day. Clasping their hands together they immediately made their way to the aisles made due to the library pages. It was basically Taehyung towing y/n all the way to the very book he wanted her to read to him.
"Okay page no. 143 piece 2." He verbalized. (Even the page no. was desperate to convey Taehyung's feelings.)
They seat themselves at a secluded area, though the whole library was ghosted they still chose sitting in a far-off corner. Near a large French window where the moonbeam seeped through perfectly making it unremarkably attractive. Taehyung sat across from her on a small round table. He had got candles to illuminate their table, but he kept them nestled in his bag pack because who goes around carrying candles in their bag pack at 2 in the morning unless you plan it. Placing their freshly grabbed lattes on the table they stared at each other. Their faces shining under the moonlight. It was like as if the white cratered rock in the night sky was also celebrating them being together.
She smiled shyly looking down which made his heart do cartwheels. She clumsily turned to page 14ɛ>.
The Snippet (You Deserve Each Other By Sarah Hogle)
"But you still haven't said you love me."
"That's not true."
"You haven't."
"I say it all the time, I just say it very, very quietly. I tell you when you're in another room, or right after we hang up the phone. I tell you when you've got headphones on. I say it after you shut the door behind you. I say it in my head every time you look at me."
He cups my face in his hands and brushes his lips over mine, his gaze so soft, a smile curving the edges of his mouth. "OfCourse, I love you, Naomi. I never stopped."
And just like that he (Taehyung) tried confessing indirectly.
+*+*+*+
Taehyung's POV:
It's only been seven days and being away from you is already incomprehensible. It's taking in all my willpower to not just sprint to you and hoist you up in the safety of my arms. What have you done y/n? Why did I have to be a total prick and push you out of my life when I can clearly not live a second without you. You govern every thought of mine. You are the first thought I have after waking up and the last thought I ponder over before going to bed. You even reign over my dreams. You've become the blood that runs in my veins. The oxygen I need to survive. Every day feels like multiplying my agony to an incurable magnitude.
+*+*+*+
There's a knock at the door. He walks up to the door to confront the person he least expected.
"Why are you here? I've told yo~" He was cut off by the mini statured guy.
"There's no time for all this. I don't know how to say it nicely. So, I won't. I feel like you need a high five.... In the face...... with a chair. Like seriously, what's wrong with you. I came here to talk some sense into you. We can continue our little burndown later but for now would you care explaining???" Jimin chided him off.
"Why are you turning her down. After so long you had allowed someone to amble their way into your life so, why shut her out? She is the missing puzzle piece which finally can piece you together. Why are you torturing yourself? You've gone through enough, Tae. Please give yourself a chance. You deserve it. Your parents also can't see you like this. They want you to be happy and you holding yourself back, blaming yourself will only hurt them more.
Tae was now sobbing lightly, "What do I do, Jimin? She doesn't deserve someone so broken and damaged, who cannot love her like she is the most amazing person in the world. She is my world Jimin, and I cannot be the apocalypse to destroy my own world. I am toxic for her. She has that friend of hers, who is pristine in each sense and what's more, he matches all the criteria of her ideal boyfriend.
I have been selfish enough already to let my heart loose and act on its own in search of love, in y/n, but I cannot sabotage her happiness by keeping her to myself. I need to let her go. I am still not able to let go of my past and I cannot risk having her go through anything like what happened in the past. She doesn't love me anyway. (Chuckles humorlessly) But even if she did, we had no future together. So, it's for the better that she doesn't. Her eyes sparkle when she sees Jungkook. They hold a sense of adoration for h~"
"Oh, shut up you dumbo. Before you assume, try this crazy method called asking. She loves you more than you realize. The girl is passionate for you. You can see the sparkles in her eyes upon seeing Jungkook, but can't you see the stars when her eyes behold yours. You can see the adoration, but can't you see the tenderness when she holds your gaze. The magnetism your sights claim when they clash. Can't you see the slight tinge her cheeks portray when you tease her. I have seen it. I have seen it all. I have seen her stealing not-so-subtle glances at you and awing over you when you doze off in the middle of the class. The little pout which envelopes her face when you divert your attention to anyone other than her. And somehow, I feel even if there were a million reasons for her to leave, she'd still rave up and stay for that one reason. It's no different for you and YOU cannot fool me. How can you let go of someone you love so dearly. Don't back down yet. Don't let go yet. Don't look so helpless. This is not 'THE KIM TAEHYUNG' I know. You are the insurgent who combats for what's his. So, you better well up that powerful chest of yours, face what's coming and finally confess to her head on. It's now or never, Tae. I hope I've said enough for you to get on the battlefield to fight your demons and win over the girl who belongs to you.
+*+*+*
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I wanna be with you,
And I wanna stay with you,
Just like the stars shining bright,
You're glowing once more,
Right here beside you, I'm still,
Walking wherever you go,
You will live forever in me,
Breathing deeply, within me.
On The Other Side:
"Kookie, I think I better drop the idea of my proposal which I planned to execute on his birthday. I don't think he'll like it. See, how he is pushing me out of his life. He doesn't want me anywhere near him. I'll make a fool out of myself by confessing to him. It's hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember but I need to get away from him. I definitely should. It's for the better. I knew it was never going to work. I should have understood when people at school told me to stay away from him. I need to leave. I'll leave him. I'll be gone. I am not needed. He doesn't need me. He hates me. He~" she continued blabbering as if her mind was stuck. She was repeating the same thing because she was still not able to accept it.
"Hey. Hey. Hey. Calm down y/n. No need to call off the proposal." She tries interrupting but he halts her by showing the palm of his hand.
"Aren't you a waste of two billion years of evolution. Like seriously, what are you even thinking. The guy is literally head over heels for you. Have you ever considered that maybe just maybe he is wrestling with something that he is not yet ready to tell you about or maybe not courageous enough to confront you, so, is hiding away. Why else would he all of a sudden shut you out? And thus, you making the first move will only push him to confess. All the barriers holding him back will be shattered." Jungkook concluded.
"Not a single one of my personalities like you right now because I know you're right. I have been a complete ignorant idiot till now." y/n ridiculed.
"That you have." He supplied cheekily.
+*+*+*+
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