Me: Ah...writer's block has really been kicking my ass lately-
Edward: ...Did you try reading already?
Me: Reading, sketching, daydreaming, the whole thing...writer's block is still kicking my ass. So I randomly wrote this-
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Note: Yep...more preferences as writer's block has been kicking my ass and I focused on rewatching the original X-Men cartoon for a while (I highly recommend it, it's a great show-)
Also, there's a couple bonus characters in here because...why not?
(That image is from my Pinterest homepage and I couldn't stop laughing inside-)
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How and when they cuddle you
Altaïr: You and Altaïr might be chilling on the couch when he suddenly pulls you into his lap by your waist and gives you light neck kisses before putting his head on your shoulder and falling asleep. Or he might come home from work and lay his head in your lap and fall asleep there-which means you can't move until he wakes up. He'll cuddle with you if you ask him to or if he feels like it.
Ezio: Ezio's definitely on the more risqué side than Altaïr and he'll cuddle with you anytime, anywhere. He'll gently grab your hips from behind for cuddles and let his hands roam from your waist and hips your knees, but he won't go further unless you want him. To him, your comfort and consent is more important than what he wants.
Connor: Despite his intimidating exterior, Connor's a gentle, kind, loving, soft and touch starved guy. Since he's kinda innocent, closer to the beginning of your relationship he'll be hesitant but as it goes on he'll get more comfortable and hug you from behind by the waist and nuzzle into the spot where your neck and shoulder meet (I think that's the crook of the neck? I'm not sure-). He'll cuddle with you if you ask but sometimes he'll just do it on his own without asking-which you don't mind because it's really cute.
Haytham: Haytham's not the most cuddly guy out there, but there are times where he'll just unexpectedly cuddle like-usually when you're both asleep. It depends on if he needs comfort (Haytham is a very traumatized dude-) or when he wants to feel loved.
Aveline: Aveline's gone through quite a bit, so she likes to come home and not let go until both of you can find a place to cuddle. She'll cuddle with you anytime.
Edward: Edward loves cuddling with you-honestly, he loves anything that can get his body close to yours. When he's having a really shitty day or he's tired, he'll grab your waist or your hips from behind and refuse to let go until you give in and cuddle with him on the bed or the couch. Despite his pirate past, he's a bit of a softie while he cuddles with you. He'll also cuddle with you anytime.
Shay: Shay doesn't seem like the most cuddly guy out there, but he's actually really cuddly and it's so fucking cute. (come on, Shay's a cinnamon roll-) He'll grab you by the waist or hips from behind-usually your hips-and lay his head on your shoulder before gently taking your hand and leading to the bed or the couch for more cuddles. He'll obviously cuddle with you anytime.
Arno: At times, Arno isn't cuddly but a lot of the time he really loves cuddling with you. He'll totally grab your waist when you get in the door after getting home from work or something and not let go until you put your things down and go cuddle with him. He'll totally cuddle with you anytime.
Jacob: Remember when I said Shay was really cuddly? Yeah, that's Jacob by a factor of 1000.He just has to cuddle with you at least twice a day or he's pouty and grouchy-basically, he's addicted to cuddling with you like he's addicted to beer and starting a gang called the Rooks. Sometimes he won't even let you get out of bed and he'll cuddle you for the whole day-this is usually on weekends or when you both have a day off on the same day because sometimes those two times a day aren't enough for him. He's such a cuddle monster and it's so cute...he's just a cinnamon roll. He'll cuddle anytime.
Evie: Evie's more like Haytham-she's reserved and likes her space. But sometimes she'll be just like her twin and become a cuddle monster, not letting you get out of bed for an entire just because she's cuddling you...especially when it's her time of the month. She'll either cuddle when she wants to or when you ask.
Bayek: Bayek is a simple guy when it comes to cuddles. He'll just put an arm around your shoulders and pull you close to his side. He'll cuddle anytime.
Aya: Aya-like Bayek-likes to keep things simple when she cuddles with you. An arm around your waist will do. She'll cuddle with you if she feels like it...or if you manage to convince her.
Kassandra: Kassandra would gladly cuddle with you and never let you go. She may be a tough mercenary on the outside but when it comes to you she's a softie. She likes to hug you from behind by the waist and nuzzle into your neck-usually while you're cooking. She'll cuddle anytime.
Alexios: Alexios is a bit more reserved-like Evie and Haytham-but he can't resist you, so he'll cuddle with you if you want him to.
Eivor: Eivor will cuddle with you anytime, anywhere. They just love cuddling with you that much.
Desmond: Desmond's a bit of a gamer boy, so he likes it when he's a playing a game on a console and you lie down beside him, putting your head in his lap. If he's in a bit of a playful or risqué mood, he'll pause his game, pull you onto his lap by your waist with his controller in one hand and go back to playing whatever game he was playing-normally Call of Duty or The Last of Us or something. Or even Horizon. Anyway, it's a win for both of you-he gets to enjoy his time with you and you a much more comfortable seat. And he'll cuddle anytime.
(BONUS) Malik: Malik will be reading or doing Jerusalem Bureau leader things before you tackle hug him to the ground and cuddle him there. He doesn't mind at all-he'll just smile and let you cuddle with him. He'll totally cuddle if you want to...or if he feels like it.
(BONUS) The writer: Since the writer's a bit touch starved-though 'a bit' might be generous considering the amount of times they've craved cuddles-they love cuddling with you. But if you don't want to cuddle with them, they'll respect that-though they'll be a little hurt they can't cuddle with their favorite person-and go cuddle with their cat or dog instead until you're ready to cuddle with them. They'll definitely cuddle with you any chance they get.
Their favorite pet names to call you
Altaïr: Habibti (sweetheart) or my love. Altaïr's a simple guy when it comes to pet names.
Ezio: Any Italian pet name you can think of. And I mean that.
Connor: My love, my dear, sweetheart, darling honey or love. Connor's an innocent cinnamon roll, after all-hell, he might even go Rhysand mode and call you 'Y/N darling'-
Haytham: My love, love, dear, my dear, or darling-and in true Rhysand fashion, he'll call you 'Y/N darling' a lot.
Aveline: Any French pet name, but Aveline will also call you babe sometimes.
Edward: Love, dear, my love, my dear, sweetheart, darling, honey...it really depends on Edward's mood. And in true Rhysand fashion like his son-he'll call you 'Y/N darling'. He might call you 'mine' at times, too.
Shay: Love, dear, sweetheart, or darling-Shay also calls you 'Y/N darling' in true Rhysand fashion.
Arno: Like Aveline, Arno will call you any French pet name but he might toss in the occasional 'babe' or 'darling'. And yes, he'll also be like Rhysand and call you 'Y/N darling'-he is a man of culture, after all.
Jacob: Love or dear. Maybe the occasional darling.
Evie: Love, dear, babe or darling.
Bayek: My love or dear.
Aya: My love, dear or darling.
Kassandra: My love, love, dear, my dear, some Greek pet names (I don't speak Greek so I can't tell you-).
Alexios: Love, dear, my sweet, Greek pet names.
Eivor: Gift from Freyja, love, my love, dear, my dear, some Norwegian pet names (again, I don't speak Norwegian so I can't tell you-)
Desmond: Babe, or the occasional darling.
(BONUS) Malik: Darling, Y/N darling, in true Rhysand fashion of course, my love, dear, little dove or habibti (sweetheart)
(BONUS) The writer: The writer knows tidbits of languages like Polish, French, Czech, Italian and a little Spanish-so they either call you pet names in any languages but mostly Polish or French. They'll call you dear, my dear, cher (in true Gambit fashion lmao-it means dear), kocham (Polish for love), jedyny moje (Polish for my only one), babe, my love and as they've read the ACOTAR series from beginning to end 5 times by now (Yes, I'm counting-and I started it for the 6th time it's just that good) they'll obviously call you 'Y/N darling'. Any chance they get.
Phone contacts
Altaïr's phone: Habibti
Your phone: Caw Caw Motherfucker
Ezio's phone: Tesoro mio
Your phone: Spaghetti
Connor's phone: Honey
Your phone: Colors of the Wind
Haytham's phone: Y/N Darling
Your phone: IRL Rhysand
Aveline's phone: Cher (dear, and in true Gambit fashion-)
Your phone: Swampy French
Edward's phone: Love
Your phone: Rum Boy
Shay's phone: Sweetheart
Your phone: Leprechaun Lucky Charms Patty
Arno's phone: Mon amour (my love)
Your phone: Titty Croissant *insert pinched fingers emoji here*
Jacob's phone: My darling
Your phone: My 5'6 Cuddle Monster
Evie's phone: Cuddle Provider
Your phone: NEEERD-but *my* nerd
Bayek's phone: Dear
Your phone: Pyramid Man
Aya's phone: Mine
Your phone: My Badass Girlfriend
Kassandra's phone: Darling
Your phone: Gyros
Alexios' phone: My sweet
Your phone: Feta Cheese
Eivor's phone: Gift from Freyja
Your phone: Ax Throwing Viking
Desmond's phone: Babe
Your phone: Car Mileage
(BONUS) Malik's phone: Little Dove
Your phone: One Arm
(BONUS) The writer's phone: Jedyny Moje (my only one)
Your phone: My touch starved, mentally unstable partner <3
-《°↭°》-
Me: HEHEHEHEHEHE *sips double Affogato with chocolate ice cream* (An Affogato is espresso with coffee in it-)
Jacob: ...I'm scared.
Me: Oh, you should be... *sips more Affogato* I didn't sleep a wink last night-
Connor: ...You're kidding, right Ash?
Me: Uhhh...nope-
Edward: Ash, how much caffeine was in that Monster you drank three days ago? Because I damn well know it wasn't the original one...
Me: ...300mg? (It was the Monster coffee energy drinks-mocha flavor and I had to get it lmao)
Edward: ASH-
Me: What?
Edward: I swear, you're addicted to Monster-
Me: You mean caffeine?
Haytham: Ash, I must wonder why you portrayed me as a Rhysand in real life.
Me: Haytham, you are a Rhysand in real life...
Haytham: I-
Jacob: It's true...I've read all of that series.
Me: Yeah, 'cause you stole them-
Jacob: ...I can't deny that.
Me: Exactly: *sips more Affogato*