Summary:
Stolas and Blitzø go through some rules,
Asmodeus is struggling to adjust to being a caregiver,
And Blitzø and Fizzarolli are just trying to keep it together...
Notes:
TW: crying, sad and loneliness, feeling scared, feeling anxious, overwhelming emotions, traumatic past, nightmares, implied overdose, fear of dying alone. Lmk if I should add
~~~Stolas and Blitzø~~~
"So...rule one: No biting." Stolas starts to list.
"And here I thought you liked it when I bite you." Blitzø jokes.
"In bed there's a different etiquette than for a toddler." Stolas explains. "Also, I don't appreciate the bleeding, thank you."
Blitzø snickers, personally he found it kind of funny. He'd probably feel embarrassed if he had remembered any of it, but he's decided to treat his little self like a separate person all together so he won't have to think too much about it being him who cried for Stolas after he fell down the stairs. (A few blurry memories started to come back to him. He's choosing not to mention it.)
Stolas and Blitzø were currently in Stolas's bedroom. Stolas was walking back and forth with a notebook in hand while Blitzø just relaxed on one of the couches by the bookshelf. They had agreed on writing down some rules for Blitzø to follow so they can have more structure when Stolas 'babysits'.
Blitzø said he really didn't care whatever Stolas thought was best, but the bird insisted they go over the rules together so there was no confusion once Blitzø was regressed.
Stolas continues. "Rule two: No throwing blocks, toys, or any miscellaneous objects inside or at others."
"Misa- what now?" Blitzø asks.
"It means anything else, Blitzy." Stolas explains. "Rule three: no cursing in headspace."
"Well, that's just bullshit." Blitzø says. "How are kids supposed to tell people to fuck off if they can't actually say it?" Blitzø asks.
"Are you actually opposed to any of this or are you just trying to be contrary?" Stolas asks, one hand on his hip.
"Don't know what those words mean, I'm just messing with you." Blitzø says smiling.
Stolas hums, then looks back at the list he wrote.
"Anything else?" Blitzø asks.
Stolas nods. "A few, yes. You can no longer go down or up the stairs by yourself, no tearing books or breaking anything on purpose, if you need something, I'd like for you to ask permission, talk things out with me instead of throwing tantrums, and from the moment you step into the palace for regressing, I will be doing everything for you to help you regress more efficiently."
"Wait, wait, wait. What?" Blitzø asks.
"Uhm, would you like me to repeat all of that?" Stolas asks.
"You mean to tell me that you want to baby me even if I'm not in a little headspace?" Blitzø asks.
"Well...yes." Stolas explains, "sometimes it's hard for littles to regress right away even when they want to, so treating you as a little and keeping you on a schedule will help your mind get used to it."
Blitzø looks at him nervously. "Mhm...yeah, okay, but hypothetically, what if I think that's incredibly stupid and a bad idea?"
Stolas sighs. "Blitzø, you said you were going to trust me." He says.
"And you said I don't have to remember any of it." Blitzø reminded.
"But, dear, if we keep to a schedule, eventually your mind will just regress without any unnecessary stress to trigger it. It just may take some time to get used to." Stolas says.
Blitzø frowns and thinks about it, he doesn't like the idea, again, has nothing to do with Stolas. But, that's way out of his comfort zone and it's also far too intimidate in general.
Stolas realizes how uneasy Blitzø looks so he marks off the rule. "You don't have to agree, you can decide if or when the moment arises. Sound good?" He asks.
Blitzø breathed a sigh of relief. It sure sounded better. "Yeah. Okay."
Stolas smiles. "Good. Now, discipline. This one is kind of important and will take some trial and error. I think a simple talking to will normally suffice, but if more extreme bad behavior arises I will simply use time outs, or taking away certain privileges such as tv, sweets, or toys."
Blitzø doesn't really know how to respond, it sounds fine, he supposed. So he just nods, giving Stolas his approval even though he won't even remember it.
Stolas adds. "Of course, I'd never take away any comfort items, don't worry about that."
Blitzø blinked at him questionably. He won't take away the things he loved most?
Stolas saw his confusion. "What's wrong?" He asks.
"Nothing...I'm just- is it even a punishment if you only take things...'the kid' doesn't care about?" Blitzø asks, recalling the time his father threw away his favorite stuffed horse when he turned five a grew an attitude. He wasn't trying to make Stolas stricter or anything, just questioning his methods.
"Well, it's one thing to take an object that is causing you distraction or tempting you to misbehave. If you're throwing blocks, it makes sense to take them away if you can't help yourself, right?" Stolas asks.
Blitzø shrugs. "I guess."
"But, it's another thing to take away something that helps you calm down like a pacifier or a stuffed animal. Especially if you're in trouble or in distress, having those objects will only bring you comfort and to take that away wouldn't teach you anything! It'll just be cruel." Stolas explains.
"Huh. Alright. Makes sense." Blitzø shrugs. "I guess."
"I'll also have a reward system in place such as: sweets, stickers, and lots of praise for good behavior."
Blitzø hums in response.
"Oh! Also, I should make a list of all the things I need to get for you that I forgot." Stolas says. "Extra Bottles, pacifiers, baby food, bibs..."
Blitzø blushed at the thought of Stolas feeding him baby food. He says this a lot- but why the fuck did he have to be a regressor?
"You sure I'm not...you know, too much trouble?" Blitzø asks. "You do seem to have a lot of rules here." He says.
Stolas walks closer to him and meets his eyes. "You are never too much trouble, darling." Stolas says, he takes Blitzø's face in his hands. "You will never be too much for me, do you understand that?" Stolas asks.
Blitzø blushes even more. "Uh- o...okay." Blitzø answers.
Stolas smiles and kisses Blitzø's forehead. "Good. The rules are only there to be sure you're safe. Has nothing to do with you being difficult." Stolas says.
"Ha! So, I am difficult! You admit it!" Blitzø shouts, as if he just proved a point.
Stolas smirks at him. "Well, yes. But not nearly as difficult as you are now."
Blitzø rolls his eyes. "You know there's a million other imps- no, other demons out there who'd love to be your little."
Stolas hums. "Yes, but they're not you, Blitzy."
Blitzø looks up at Stolas for a moment before looking away, frowning. "So...anything else you want to talk about?" He asks.
"No, I believe that's it." Stolas says, smiling slightly, he could tell something just crossed Blitzø's mind, and he wished he knew what it was. "Thank you."
"Yeah..." Blitzø nods. "You too."
~~~Asmodeus and Fizzarolli ~~~
"Ozzie! I don't need the day off!" Fizzarolli insisted. "I'm fine."
"Fizz, you're supposed to be regressing at least once a week." Ozzie explains. They've been fighting about this for a while now and it was exhausting! Asmodeus hated fighting with fizz and usually he would cave by now, but legally littles needed to take two days off, and Fizzarolli was no exception.
"Says who?" Fizz asks.
"Says the booklet they gave me with instructions on how to take care of you." Asmodeus says, holding up the book.
Fizzarolli takes it. "How to take care of your regressed little?" He asks, reading the title. "I don't regress that much! I don't live my life based on what a book says...that would be stupid." Fizz explains.
Asmodeus sighs. "Fizz, you have to work with me here." He says.
"How can I do that if you won't let me work?" Fizz asks.
Asmodeus rolls his eyes. "For fucks sake."
Fizzarolli rolls his eyes too. "Just because legally you are in charge of me, doesn't mean you get to control my entire life." He says, arms crossed.
"I'm not trying to control you, Fizz. I'm trying to help you." Asmodeus explains. "As your boyfriend and your boss, I want what's best for you."
Fizzarolli sighs, slumping on the couch bitterly like a child who didn't get their way. "Do I have to regress?" Fizzarolli asks in a pitiful whine.
"You have today and tomorrow off, whatever you choose to do is your business." Asmodeus says. "I would never make you regress if you don't want to."
"Good. Because I don't need to and I don't want to either." Fizzarolli explains.
"Fine." Asmodeus says. "Do whatever you need to, you can go back to work on Monday."
~~Monday: Fizz and Asmodeus ~~~
Fizzarolli was crying.
He was supposed to work tonight, and he probably still could. But, Fizzarolli had two days to regress as much as he needed to, and his brain decides the day he goes back to work was the day he was going to regress...
Super.
They were eating breakfast when Fizzarolli started tearing up uncontrollably.
"Fizz, what's wrong?" Ozzie ask.
"I'm little, daddy. I'm sorry." Fizz says sadly, hoping Asmodeus wouldn't be angry with him.
"I figured that much." Ozzie says. "Is there anything else bothering you?"
"M' head hurts." Fizz whines. "Will you hold me? Please?" The little asks, getting up off his seat.
Ozzie nods and picks up the little one and sets him on his lap. "Fizz...this is what happens when you repress, bug." Ozzie explains. "We've talked about this before, remember?"
"Bu', I don' like it." Mumbles Fizzarolli.
"Don't like what?"
"Regressin'...sometimes it makes me feels alone...and sad." Fizzarolli admits.
"It does?" Asmodeus asks, he didn't know that.
Fizz nods. "It's scary...n' I don't want to feel bad."
Ozzie holds the little one close. "I'm sorry, darling. That does sound scary. I wish I had known."
"Sorry." Fizzarolli mumbles.
Asmodeus kisses his cheek. "It's okay, bug. It'll take some time to get used to all this... but, in the future if something is wrong, I'd like for you to tell me, alright?" He asks.
Fizzarolli nods.
"Now, is there something I can do to make regressing less scary?" Ozzie asks him.
Fizz wraps his robotic arms around Ozzie. "Just stay with me."
Asmodeus smiles. "That, I can do. Do you want to finish your breakfast?"
Fizz shakes his head, not wanting to move.
"What if I fed it to you?" Asmodeus suggests. He wants to be sure Fizzarolli eats since he has a habit of forgetting.
Fizzarolli squirms a little while thinking about it, maybe a little nervous at the idea... but it was better than being alone. "Mm okay." He says.
Asmodeus happily feeds Fizzarolli and makes sure he drinks plenty of water.
The rest of the day included Asmodeus trying to get some last minute work done while simultaneously keeping a six year old entertained.
Anytime Ozzie suggested Fizzarolli play in the play room or watch a movie, Fizz refused because he didn't want to be alone.
He realized he may need some help with this caregiver stuff.
But there was no one he personally knew who could give him some honest advice.
He could see a therapist he supposed, but Fizz was already being forced to see one, plus, he also had a caseworker... Fizz would probably wouldn't like yet another stranger in his business.
If only there was someone Asmodeus already trusted...
~~~Blitzø:~~~
That night Blitzø and Stolas did their normal full moon thing. Stolas of course was exhausted and laid down on the bed as soon as they were done.
Blitzø started to get dressed, but Stolas stopped him. "Will you please stay tonight?" He asks.
Blitzø nods. "Yeah, I guess I can. Whatever you want, it's your night." He says, laying down next to Stolas
Stolas smiles slightly as he snuggled up with Blitzø. "Thank you, darling."
Blitzø relaxed as the two drifted to sleep, everything seemed fine, but deep down his anxiety was eating at him...
'I could never hurt you.' Stolas says.
The bird was in front of him, gold feathers flying everywhere.
'I would never give up on you.' The prince says, holding a gold chain that connected to Blitzø's neck.
'You are never too much trouble for me, Blitzy.' He promised.
What the fuck does that mean? He tried not to think too much about it, tried his best to just forget about it, forget about Stolas on any night they were together...
And sometimes even when they were together...
But the words haunted him...
It got dark and suddenly Stolas disappeared.
'Blitzø?'
Blitzø looks around for Stolas, but he can't find him...
'Despite everything that's happened, I...I enjoyed spending time with you.' He heard in the distance.
"Why?" He asks.
'Are you afraid to love people Blitzy?'
"Yes...Maybe." He answers. "I don't know!"
'Does it hurt to?' The prince's voice asks.
"I-" He didn't want to answer that.
'Why can't you love, Blitzy?'
He couldn't love someone! Anyone! Everyone who he has loved has failed him. Left him....
Or did he always leave them?
He was in too deep, he was trusting Stolas, he even wonders if maybe he cares about the prince...
The realization was scary.
'There are scarier things...aren't there, son?' His father's voice echoed.
He can't make it with Stolas... he had to end this!
'But, ya don't wanna do things alone, Blitzo!' Another voice said.
'You're gonna die alone, Blitzo!'
'You're gonna die alone!'
He can be alone! That's fine!
'You tried the solo act, it didn't work out so well!' Faux Fizzarolli says.
He's right...
The only thing scarier than loving someone was being alone forever, but that's what family was for!
'I didn't need you then asshole! I don't now!' Loona says- why was she here?
'We are not a family! You are the boss, we are the employees!' Moxxie's voice shouts.
'You ruined my fucking life!' He suddenly hears Barb say...
And she's right.
He ruins everyone's lives.
Maybe he was the one who needed them..
'Yet you still shove away anyone who gets too close until they resent you for being a selfish, shitty, shit fuck!'
No!
Suddenly Blitzø was on the kitchen floor, phone in hand....
'Hello?'
'Verosika?' He asks.
'What the fuck do you want, asshole?' She asks.
A tear ran Blitzø's face as he looks down at the body in his arms. 'It's...nothing.' He hangs up.
'I'm so sorry...' he whispered to her while she laid unconscious in his arms. 'You can't leave me too, I'm sorry you can't. Please don't leave me.'
He did what he felt he had to, and in doing so destroyed everything.
Who's to say he won't do that to Stolas?!
'You can't hurt me, Blitzy.'
Really? He can't? Why did that seem so unbelievable?
'You will never be too much for me, do you understand, dear?' The owl was suddenly in front of him once again, light starting to surround him. The body in his arms was replaced by the gold chain, which transformed into a pair of handcuffs that locked him and Stolas's wrists together.
They look down at their hands, then each other...
Then suddenly...
'Please don't cry, Starlight.' A material voice says to him.
He jumps, and wakes up yet again in Stolas's room...
Blitzø was relived it was over... he gives himself a few moments to get over that before he looks over the sleeping prince carefully.
Yeah...he's safe. For now at least.
If Blitzø really meant nothing to Stolas...why would he work so hard for only a fraction of intimacy he could get for far cheaper in pride or lust?
And if Stolas meant nothing to him, why did he think about him all the time?
Blitzø was hesitant, but he snuggles up close to Stolas, allowing himself that intimacy he craved...
He can think over the other shit some other time.
But, maybe Stolas was right, maybe it was cruel to push away the one person that provided him some comfort.
Notes:
Please leave a comment if you like this story and want more. ❤️
I'm a little worried how this chapter turned out. I hope it's okay. 😅
We're staring to get both Fizz and Blitzø chapters which means their interaction is soon!
Happy pride month btw