Nicolai
Ever since I told Sutton what really happened with Jason, things have been...chilly between us. It wasn't like things were fantastic before, but I felt like before she came in to see me in the middle of the night, we were getting somewhere. But now, we're back to side glances and polite conversations over dinner.
And Jason is on my nerves more than ever. I swear, I'm going to lose it soon if he doesn't stop baiting me. I've held it in as long as possible but I'm teetering on the edge of sanity between that and the...frustration I feel building between me and Sutton. Touching her the other night in her room was not enough for me. I need her like I need my next breath and being right across the hall from her is too fucking much when she isn't speaking to me.
She's in the living room playing the Playstation with Dominique when I peek down the hall, and I send Dom a text message. Keep her occupied for a bit?
Dominique: What are you up to?
Nicolai: I have a surprise for her, and I want to put it in her room, but I don't want her to catch me doing it. I got it before she moved in but I haven't had a chance to give it to her.
Dominique: Oh my god, that's precious. Yeah, I got you.
I slide my phone in my pocket and duck my head into my closet, pulling out the bags that I placed in the floor the day I moved in. Darting across the hall, I slip silently into her room.
The bedroom we set up for her is large, a queen size bed with a memory foam mattress and fluffy comforter in the middle complete with mountains of pillows. Sutton always did love having too many soft objects on her bed; she said it made her feel like she was in a pillow fort.
I always thought there was a deeper reason than a pillow fort though; I think they made her feel protected. Safe. She wanted me to stay with her all the time, and while I could've gotten away with it on my side, her father never would have allowed it.
She was always so fucking lonely. Even though she trusted her father, and still does, that's not the same as having your person.
That's all I ever wanted. Was to be her person.
I blow out a sharp breath, setting the bags on the bed and pulling out the objects inside. I went to four Targets between here and Brooklyn and bought as many of these goddamn squishy marshmallow stuffed animal things I could find. She used to always talk about wanting one, and I had always wanted to do it. But I never got the chance.
I probably overdid it; there must be twenty of them on her bed now, but I wanted her to have them. I would've bought her every single one in each of those stores if I thought it would help.
Also inside a couple of the bags are books from the reading list Dom gave me. Apparently the day I followed them around the park was the last time Sutton got to go book shopping, and she had added at least fifteen books to her list since then. Between Target and Barnes and Noble, they had all of them. I leave them stacked on her nightstand and slip out of her room with the plastic bags in my hands.
When I get safely back across the hall, I text Dominique that I'm finished.
She's so impatient. She insists she needs to get back to her room immediately for something. No idea what.
I can't help the smirk that turns up my lips. Sutton always had some kind of sixth sense about me and what I was up to. I wonder if she knew somehow I was in her room. I set my phone on my nightstand, grabbing the remote and turning on the television. I'm barely five minutes into my next episode of Beckham on Netflix when I hear a little squeak from her room. Those fucking butterflies from the day I saw her at the park return, and I don't even want to push them away.
God, what if it was too much? What if she thinks I'm a weirdo for remembering that? What if I—
"Nicolai, did you do this?" she asks, barging into my room clutching a book with a bright floral cover and a plush in the shape of blueberry pancakes. Her cheeks are pink and her green eyes are glassy.
Suddenly I don't know how to respond. The alpha-hole side of me feels like I should be cocky and sarcastic, pretend that I don't have any idea what she's talking about, that maybe she should ask Jason.
But I don't want to do that. I want her to know that I thought of her.
So I meet her gaze and nod once. "I did. I hope that's okay."
Her lips part and I want nothing more than to run my thumb over that bottom one that's plumper than the other and then kiss her until she tells me to stop.
She walks over to where I sit on my bed and plops down beside me. "I can't believe you remembered."
"Sutton, I remember everything you've ever said to me."
Her eyelids flutter shut and she takes a deep breath, like she's trying to contain her emotions. "But it was just a Squishmallow."
I snap my fingers. "Yeah, I couldn't remember what the hell they were called until I got to the store and saw them. But I remembered you always wanted one...I didn't know if you ever got one or not, but when you got here and didn't bring any with you, I figured I'd made the right move by picking these up."
The corners of her mouth turn up, and she looks down at the pancake, tracing the threads of its little smile.
"I didn't. My dad always thought they were just a fad that would take up too much space in the house, and he never bought me one even though I'd ask every once in a while. But when he and Jason both told me sixteen was 'too old to be wanting stupid stuffed animals,' I was too embarrassed to bring them up again. I know I could've gotten one myself after I started working, but by that time, I had decided they were probably right."
It makes me angry that her father and Jason ever made her feel like anything she wanted was stupid or like it didn't matter. Everything about her matters.
"Well, I wanted you to have them," I say, reaching out and tucking her hair behind her ear. "And Dominique told me that those books were freshly added to your list, so I got those too."
She shakes her head and a breathy laugh escapes her. "That was really sweet of you, Nicolai. Thank you."
"It was nothing," I say with a shrug.
She gets to her feet and looks down at me. "It wasn't. It was more than that, and you know it."
I stand and my eyes dart over her face, from her eyes to her lips and back again. "I know."
As if she's just remembered she's supposed to be upset with me, she puts some space between us and says, "Anyway, thank you. I'll have a lot to read now."
I nod and step back. "You're welcome, Sutton."
She turns to leave, and even though the wall isn't demolished, the bricks are coming down slowly but surely, and that is progress.
***
"We need to talk."
I look up from my laptop and see Kincaid standing at my door, his arms crossed over his chest. He's still dressed for work, and I roll my eyes at his pretentious pinstripe suit.
"I don't have anything to say to you," I reply, looking back down at my screen, resuming my research on what the hell illegal activities he could possibly be into.
Yeah, I'm researching it right in front of him. I don't give a shit. He doesn't have x-ray vision.
He stomps across the room and slams my laptop screen down, nearly smashing my fingers. "Hey, fucker!" I exclaim, jumping off the bed and getting in his face. "What the hell? That's my fucking property!"
"And you're in my goddamn house! I said I needed to talk to you, and you're not going to ignore me," he says in a huff.
I laugh. "I'm here doing my job, dickhead. I'm not living here because I want to. Trust me. I don't like being near you anymore than you like being near me."
"You're only here because you and Dominique fucked me over and put me in an impossible situation. As soon as Xavier is back, your ass is out of here because Sutton is going home and there will be no more use for you."
I smirk and cock my head to the side. "Oh, you think so? I wouldn't be so sure about that, druže."
"What, you think you have a chance with her?" he asks, his eyes widening comically, like he's so fucking hilarious. "That's really cute."
I just stare at him. "What did you need again, šupak?"
"Speak English if you're going to insult me."
"What did you need again, asshole?" I repeat with a straight face.
"Fuck you."
"You asked for it."
"I really want to punch you in your face."
"I'd like to see you fucking try." I'm three inches taller than Jason and outweigh him by about fifty pounds.
"Instead," he says loudly over me, like he's making a point, "I'll say what I came in here to say. Whatever it is you're doing here, whatever ulterior motive you have, you better just shut that shit down right now. I don't know if it has to do with Sutton, or the business, or Xavier, or me, but just fucking stop."
"As if I would give a shit about you," is all I give him in return.
"So you are here for something."
I raise my eyebrows. "If I were, I wouldn't tell you. So you've said what you needed to say. You can leave now. Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out."
"Listen, jackass, I'm well aware that I can't make you leave without getting myself into some shit too."
"That's right," I say, stepping toward him, forcing him to back closer to the door. "Because I know what kind of person you are, Jason Kincaid. I don't forgive when it comes to you, and I sure as hell don't forget."
His face turns blood red and I practically see smoke coming out of his ears. "Marković, your mother is dead now, so I have nothing to hold over you this time. But when there's no longer a reason for you to be here, I swear to God, you're getting the fuck out."
I tuck my lips between my teeth and hope that he just dug his own grave. Because while I want to rip his tongue out for even having my mother's name in his mouth, I think what he just did will be an even bigger punishment.
"All right, Kincaid. Whatever you say. You got me there."
He eyes me with a narrowed gaze and finally turns on his heel and flees my room. And before I slam my door behind him, I see a flash of dark hair before Sutton's door creaks shut.
Congratulations, Jason. You just fucked yourself and put me exactly where I need to be.