SOFIA
He hasn't talked to me the next week. Hasn't even come in the morning to see me. Yet he still stares at me. And every time our eyes meet, he swallows hard. Then looks away.
I hate him. And I hate me that I think about him. More than I should. He was right. He's in my dreams now. In every single one of them. Maybe I don't hate him as much.
It's only Friday afternoon I get his text. I'm all cuddled up in my winter coat, although it's only the beginning of October but I'm freezing. Hence why the coat. I'm sitting on a chair at a nice café, only thirty minutes away from campus. Nini is whining herself on the other chair; already done with two pumpkin lattes, her favorite drink ever, and waiting for the third one; complaining about how bad the guy she's been on a date with is. She's been on two more dates with him since last Sunday, and the last one might have gone really bad since we're here for almost two hours and she still isn't done talking.
"And then he comes to me and says: You're such a dumb girl. Like he said that. To my face. To my freaking face," she continues. Yet I'm distracted by my phone screen who lights up with a message from Alec.
HIM: I fucked up, Foxy.
I swallow hard and don't know what to say. He continues texting me.
HIM: I thought I could get over you.
HIM: I thought that if I try to forget you, I won't be as obsessed with you.
HIM: But I am.
HIM: You messed with my head, Foxy.
HIM: You're so cruel.
HIM: I can't get over you. I need you. I want you.
I stare at the screen like frozen. I can't breathe. Nini must have noticed since she asks.
"Who is it?"
I look up and can feel how I'm shivering. I can't do this anymore.
"I'm going to the toilet. I'll be right back."
She wants to stop me but I hurry up and don't stop to breathe until I'm locked in a cabin.
I stare at the messages and sadly, another thought flashes through my head.
ME: Are you drunk?
His answer comes in less than a minute.
HIM: You think I have to be drunk to want you? I can assure you I'm not. I'm pretty much sober.
HIM: Which makes it worse. Because of the pain I feel.
I sigh and remind myself how damn broken I feel. But I also can't forget the last week.
ME: You completely ignored me, Alec! For someone who wants me, you pretty sure know how to not show it. You didn't even look at me.
HIM: I know. And I am sorry.
Did I just make Alec Dunn apologize?!
HIM: You told me you didn't trust me, Foxy. What the heck was I supposed to do?!
HIM: But I am over it now. How could you trust me?
HIM: Let me make it up to you. Tomorrow. Eight o'clock. I'll pick you up in front of your dorm.
I swallow hard. Then answer:
ME: How am I supposed to know you won't murder me or something?!
HIM: You can't. Guess you'll have to listen to your heart, Foxy.
I don't respond. He doesn't add anything else. Yet my heart says yes.