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I WAS LOSING my mind.
Every second felt like a year, and every lost second was a second closer to losing two of the people I cared the most about in this world.
Milo was as useless as his cut off dick. He passed out, not before he'd given that twisted attention-grabbing sentence.
I wanted to end his life, right then and there, but at least one of us was thinking straight, and Sebastian managed to get me off him before I did something I regretted.
I had so many plans for the bastard, and he wasn't allowed to die so easily.
''Calm the fuck down, Elijah, we will find them.''
We were outside of the cottage, and I smashed one of the cars until it was unrecognizable. The deep anger and agony weren't something under my control, nor something I wanted to control.
''How do you plan on finding them? They could both be dead as we speak!'' Yelling wasn't helping, but I didn't care.
''While you were busy smashing that fucking car, I found two sets of keys on him. They're the same as the one for this cabin, so they're probably in the woods.''
And Sebastian was right.
They were so close by that we were wasting time with Milo.
He went after Celine with a few of his men, while he told me to take the other side with another couple of people.
I was running, searching and not stopping. There was no second to spare, and my mind was only focused on finding Freya.
Celine was a tough girl, and she would be okay. She was trained to handle situations like these since she was a teenager.
''Come on, Freya.'' I said out loud, ''Please, be alive.''
I didn't know how long we'd been in the forest.
I didn't know which direction we came from, nor where we were heading. I was going in blindly, and as stupid as it was, it was the best option.
Coming up with a game plan would've taken way too long, and there was no time to spare.
My whole world came crushing down, for the millionth time in such a short amount of time.
I came across a cabin. I didn't think twice before I broke the door, rushing inside. If I could describe how it would potentionally feel being stabbed in heart, it would be this. Piercing pain shot through my chest, as my lungs seemed to have collapsed.
I couldn't breathe, I couldn't see.
Rage boiled deeply inside of me. It took every bit of self restraint I had to push all of it to the back of my brain. All of the physical and mental ache, all of the rage and all of the inevitable sorrow. I forced my feet to rush towards the sight in front of me.
Nothing but a pool was located in the room.
And the pool was too deep, along the lines of the ones used by professional swimmers.
On the bottom of the pool was Freya.
Chained in a metal chair, at least three times her weight.
I jumped in.
Two men jumped right after me, helping me to bring her up. Even with two of them, who were bulkier than I was, stronger and faster, it was still a struggle to bring her to the surface. One of the remaining men was outside, grabbing some of the tools he'd brought, smartly.
The water was slowly getting in my lungs, and it stung. Slowly, I was having less and less air, and my heart began to race rapidly.
The chains were rusty, with no keys and no way to get her out.
Her face... she was as pale as a ghost, her lips in a light shade of blue. She was ice cold, and she looked to be in so much pain. Her eyes were closed shut, water oozed out of her nose.
I tried everything I could think of, while they were trying to get her freed from the chains that were embedded in her skin. I felt myself freezing completely as my palm was on her heart. It was still.
And Freya wasn't breathing.
•••
I've hated the smell of a hospital, ever since I remembered. I wasn't admitted often, though I came as a visitor on multiple occasions. Mainly, Sebastian was wounded far too many times for me to remember.
Oftentimes, our dad wasn't in such a great shape, either, and I grew to hate their recklessness, and the way they never valued their lives.
The reunion between mom, dad and Celine was heard through the entire hospital. Sebastian found her in the cabin that was on fire, and no matter how well Celine was handling it, she got burned, though the doctors said it wouldn't scar too much.
Celine was mainly disoriented. They found traces of multiple drugs in her system, and luckily, they caught everything on time, and it wasn't lethal.
On the other hand, Freya's parents were losing it. I was losing it, with them.
Her mom sobbed into her husband's chest whilst the doctors were working on Freya. Her piercing screams and muffled cries grabbed everyone's attention.
No amount of encouragning words, of prayers were able to soothe her. It was understandable, and although they were grateful that I found her, I fucking hated myself beyond point of reason.
Thirty minutes later, and I was pacing in the waiting room. Her mom had a shot to calm her down, but her father was concerning me.
He looked so numb, that I was unsure what he would do if he snapped.
My heart was aching, and as soon as my mom heard that I was here, waiting for news on Freya, she was quick to try and calm me down. I hadn't realized that I cried.
It was laughable, truly. A few months ago, everyone in this world could've parrished, and I never would've thought about it twice. No one's had such an impact on my life, not as much as Freya had.
From the moment I saw her at Limited, I knew that I needed to have her. She was like the sweetest drug, an addiction I never wanted to get sober from. A true dismay for a man like me, a fitting ending for a man like me.
''How is she doing?'' I heard Sebastian ask.
I turned around and saw him with an extra cup of coffee. I took it and gagged. Hospital coffee was the worst, but it helped with my nerves, even if it was slightly.
''I don't know anything. They're still working on her.''
He nodded his head, ''What did they say when you brought her in?''
I felt the anger slowly rise, ''Possibly, nerve damage. She'd been in water for way too long, and they struggled to get her heart beating again. It was faint. She had a lot of water in her lungs and now... we wait.''
Sebastian placed his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it, providing me unnecessary reassurance, ''You should rest.''
I laughed, ''I'll rest when I'm dead.''
Another twenty minutes passed by before the doctor emerged from the emergency room. All of us rushed towards him as he stopped in front of Freya's parents.
''How is she?'' Her mother asked, eyes swelled with tears.
The doctor smiled, ''It was very difficult to get her heart beat to normal and to warm up her body. She's still not breathing on her own, and tonight will be a rough night, and she will be monitored closely, and if she makes it through the night, we'll try to take her off the machine in the morning.''
A sigh of relief washed over me.
''Can we see her?''
The doctor nodded, ''Only immediate family now, the rest of you should go home and rest.''
I was pissed beyond words that they weren't going to let me see her, but Sebastian threw me a glance, telling me to keep the words to myself. And he was right, in these times, she needed her parents the most.
I never went home. I made myself comfortable on the chair in the waiting room, and doozed off.
All I dreamed of was Freya's face. Her soft laugh, her loving eyes. Her long hair, how she looked fresh out of shower in nothing but a shirt that belonged to me. Her lingering scent that left traces for days after she was gone.
And then, I was suddenly awoken by doctors and nurses rushing past me. Beeping noises came from Freya's room and we were all on our feet, trying to get past the doctors.
No one was explaining what was happening, and I was furious at them.
I was numb. I couldn't feel a thing. All I heard were the cries of agony that came from her mother, and saw tears that were streaming down her fathers cheeks, and he wasn't the man who would cry easily.
Her mom fell to her knees, crying and screaming for her baby.
I took a step closer. My heart tightened.
My vision slowly became all black, I stumbled backwards slightly. Those words, the ones I would never be able to forget, the ones I never wanted to hear, came out of the doctors mouth.
''Time of death, 03:46.''
•••