"Congratulations to all the graduates!" the volleyball team all cheered in unison. Our captain, which was also my batchmate, made a small speech which left our younger years all teary-eyed.
Hindi ko alam kung naiiyak sila dahil aalis na kami ng volleyball team, o dahil lasing na silang lahat, pero hindi na ako aangal. Ilang buwan na rin naman naka-lipas since our graduation, pero ngayon lang ulit nag-sama sama kaming teammates.
"Graduate na tayo, sana naman graduate ka na rin sa kupal mong ex, 'no?" tanong sa akin ni Lizzy, 'yung dating libero namin.
I laughed. "Ako na nga nag-bibigay ng advice sa mga lovelife niyo, eh! Graduate na graduate na ako d'yan."
"Uy pero Ate Lia, ano pala balita sa lovelife mo? Wala pa rin talaga?!" tanong naman ni Cass, ang setter namin. "Sa ganda mong 'yan? Bawa't laro nga natin, may panibagong nagkaka-crush sa'yo!"
"Eh paano magkaka-boyfriend 'yan? Halata namang may nag-abangerz d'yan." Tumawa ang captain naming si Alyana. "Ano balita, Lia? Ipag-aantay mo ba talaga na maging residente 'yon?"
Umiling ako at ngumiti.
It's been.. more or less three years now since Z and I broke up, and I'm genuinely, truly at my happiest. With my self, my family, my friends, and..
Zeke knows what he means to me. He knows he's got a spot in my life. We just.. we aren't together. We're friends. We're there for one another whenever we need each other. I'm not stopping him from dating other girls, he's not stopping me from dating other guys, either. He's a really important person in my life who helped me through my dark times. He's the reason I'm so good at giving advice now. All those words of wisdom didn't go in vain.
I just want me to be fully okay once I do get in any kind of relationship. I don't really want to go in half-heartedly. And now, I'm honestly at the point where I'm trying to figure out my next move in life first before I get into anything. But I also do know that I'm almost at the point in my life where maybe.. just maybe.. maybe I'm ready.
The others started reminiscing with everything we went though as a team, especially this past year. It was our last year, so we really wanted to win BBEAL, considering we lost noong 3rd year kami. So each one of us trained harder than we did before.
As they all exchanged stories, I scanned the place and suddenly saw a very familiar face by the bar, sitting all alone, confused and.. lonely, I think.
I excused myself from my teammates and walked towards her. Once I saw her face, I immediately confirmed in my mind that it was indeed Natalia, one of the friends of Raffy and Vale. As far as I know, she's their Churchmate but met her through Claude. I met her through volleyball when I played for SAMCIS noong intrams namin nung first year kami.
"Um, just a glass of—"
"Oh my gosh, Natalia? Hi!"
She seemed surprised by my presence. I gave her a big smile. "Grabe! I didn't think this was your type of crowd!"
Medyo awkward ang tawa niya nung bigla ko nalang siyang niyakap. "It's.. I'm.."
I checked her expression and.. I knew that all too well. Mukhang isang pitik nalang, maiiyak na siya.
"Are you okay?" I asked. "You don't look okay."
Tears started welling up in her eyes and I immediately went in for another hug. Hindi ko man siya gaano ka-close, she's still a friend. And it sucks seeing her upset.
"Hala, okay lang 'yan," I said while patting her back.
I found a stool right beside her and tried to comfort her. It took a few minutes before she opened up, but when she did, it left me in shock. Hindi ko alam na sobrang tagal na pala niyang sinasarili ang mga problema niya at tinatago 'yon sa mundo.
As we were having our girl talk moment, nagulat nalang ako nung biglang tumunog ang cellphone ko. I saw a random number on my phone.
I gave Natalia an apologetic look as I answered the call.
"Lia? Lia, sorry. Si Miggy 'to. Alam kong ayaw mo akong makausap, pero si Magui kasi.. lasing na lasing."
"What?" I let out a sigh. "Where are you?"
"Dito sa The Camp. Hindi ko rin alam nangyari."
"Wait, papunta na 'ko." I let out a sigh and placed a thousand peso bill on the table. Tinignan ko agad si Natalia at hinila siya. "Come with me!"
Once we got to where I parked my car, I started panicking. It's been a while since Mage has been like this. The last time I saw her irresponsibly drunk was when she was still healing from Kuya. This isn't good.
"Wait, are you sure you should be driving?" Natalia asked.
"Ay, true. You only had water right?" I handed her my keys. "Automatic 'to! It's easy to drive."
We went inside the car and it looked like Natalia knew what she was doing naman, so it lessened the things I had to worry about.
My phone suddenly buzzed, adding to my panic, so I immediately answered it.
"Lia? It's Ethan. I just found Miggy and Mags-"
"Just wait! Don't take her anywhere," mabilis kong sabi sabay baba sa tawag.
I immediately opened my messenger to message Vale.
Lia Chen:
Are you busy?
Need your help
It's about Magui
Nasa The Camp siya
I bit my lip and closed my conversation with Vale, and then opened a new conversation with Ethan.
Lia Chen:
Bakit niyo ba kasama si Mags? How did Miggy find her in the first place?
Ethan Lim:
I was the one who called her.
Si Miggy yung pumasok doon para hanapin siya when I told him that something was up.
Lia Chen:
Why do are you still in contact with her in the first place? Bakit ba kayo nandito sa Baguio?
Ethan Lim:
Lia, kaibigan pa rin naman namin si Magui. I just call her from time to time when I feel like she's not okay.
"Saan punta?" Natalia suddenly asked.
"Oh, samay Camp. You know where that is ba?" I asked her. "Sorry, super sabog. Si Mage kasi!"
Once we got there, bumaba agad ako ng sasakyan and ran to Mage who was sitting down by the stairs with Miggy and Ethan standing beside and behind her, as if they were body guards.
"Thanks, I've got it from here," I said while helping Mage up. Tinalikuran ko agad sila at nag-lakad na papalayo.
I haven't seen them in years. At ayoko na silang makita.
"Lia-" Ethan suddenly said.
"Stop calling!" I hissed at him.
I know I'm in no position to choose the people in Mage's life, but it was the only thing I could think of. I haven't spoken to them in years.. and that was the first thing I could think of.
Natalia helped me with Mage, too. She carried Mage with her other arm and looked at me.
"Mukhang desperadong kausapin ka."
I scrunched my nose. "You should really talk to Vale."
As if the universe heard me, I suddenly heard a voice.
"Ano nangyari?"
I looked at Vale who looked worried sick for Magui.
"Lasing nanaman!" I sighed.
Vale immediately took Magui away from Natalia and I. Tinignan ko silang dalawa nang paulit ulit bago ko tuluyan na pinakawalan si Mage.
"Ako na mag-hahatid kay Mage!"
Natalia looked worried. "Naka-inom-"
"Shshshshhhh!" I quickly cut her off.
For sure, Vale would do anything just to ensure that we all get home safely, even at the expense of his own time and energy. I'm sure Natalia needs that more than we do.
Kumunot ang mukha ni Vale sa akin. "Are you sure? Hindi ka ba nakainom?"
"Onti lang!" I said while pointing her pointy finger on Natalia's nose and the other one on my nose. "See? Not drunk!"
Vale did not look convinced. He let out a sigh and walked straight to his car, so I ran all the way to his door and blocked it.
"We'll get a cab! Taxi! Taxi! Oh see, there's one here na."
"No."
I scrunched up my nose again and sighed. "Fine. Ihatid mo rin si Natalia, she helped me all night."
Lumingon si Vale kay Natalia.
"Oo." Vale nodded and opened the door. "Doon ka na sa harap, Lia."
"No! I'll stay here sa likod. You know, just in case Mage needs to barf!" I smiled and immediately entered his vehicle.
I couldn't contain my giggle once Natalia sat in front. After hearing her kwento about Vale, all I want now is for them to fix things. Kahit na they don't get back together, I just want them to be able to have closure man lang.
"Vale, hatid me nalang sa house. I'll let Magui sleep there."
Tumingin muna sa akin si Vale sa rearview mirror. I nodded, assuring him that it was okay.
Vale has always been protective of us, especially when it comes to guys that have hurt us. He knows Mage is bound to run into Kuya when she's in our house, so I get where Vale is coming from. But I can't just leave Mage passed out on her sofa with no one else to take care of her, either. Mage has never, ever left my side even in my drunkest nights. There's no way I'm not doing the same for her.
"Bye! Thanks, Vale," sabi ko habang palabas ng sasakyan. I looked at Natalia and widened my eyes, but I wasn't sure if it did anything considering my eyes were chinky.
"Ipasok ko na si Magui sa loob," Vale said as he opened the other door.
While Vale carried her up the stairs and to the front door, I knew manang would answer the door already, so I knocked on the window where Natalia was sitting with a huge smile.
"You gotta talk to him!"
"Umuwi ka na!" she said while laughing.
Lumingon ako sa pintuan. "Ayan na siya, pabalik na. Update me!"
I gave Vale a hug before running back to the house. Tinutulungan na ni manang si Mage sa sofa, kaya naman nag-patulong na rin ako sa kaniya na i-akyat si Magui sa kwarto ko.
"Thanks, Manang." I laughed. "Phew."
"Naku, ang tagal na ata nung huling ganito ni Magui?" sabi ni manang.
"Kaya nga po, eh." I let out a deep breath. "Sinundo ko rin lang siya."
"Osya, kumain ka na ba? May natira pang liempo sa baba, hindi inubos nung mga kaibigan ng kuya mo."
"Sinong kaibigan, manang?"
"Ah, yung mga ano, mga matatangkad. Sina Zeke. Nandito sila, nasa kwarto ata ni Gabe ngayon."
I nodded. Sumabay na rin ako kay manang pababa ng first floor para makakuha ng tubig.
Once I saw someone by our poolside typing on his laptop with his glasses on, I smiled to myself and stepped outside.
Lumingon agad siya sa akin at ngumiti. "Hey, Ace."
"Hey," I greeted in a sing-song voice.
"Aga mo ata, ah? Diba iinom kayo ng teammates niyo ngayon?"
"Yeah." I sighed. "Got cut short. Magui's upstairs. She got wasted."
Kumunot ang noo ni Zeke. "Is she okay?"
"I'm not entirely sure. The last time I saw her like this.." I stared out into the pool and sighed. "I don't know what she's going through. Marami ata siyang hindi nak-kwento."
Zeke nodded. "I'm sure she'll tell you when she's ready."
Tumango rin ako at kumuha nung paper plate na nasa mesa. "Kumain na kayo? Ano pala ginagawa niyo here?"
"You didn't get my text? Nag-imbita si Gabe na mag-ihaw." He laughed. "Nag-swimming rin sina Francis tapos uminom. Nasa kwarto sila ni Gabe ngayon."
"And you're.." I looked at his laptop.
"Finishing up my readings." He let out a laugh. "Sucks to be the only one still in school in your group of friends, I guess."
"Hey, Kuya's thinking of going to law school naman. Pretty soon, siya naman iinggitin niyo."
"Really? Itutuloy niya ba?" he removed his glasses and started to put some rice on my plate.
"I don't know." I shrugged.
He remained silent as he placed some liempo on my plate, as well.
I smiled at him. "You take good care of me."
He chuckled. "Wouldn't be a good friend if I didn't."
Hindi ko napigilan na ngitian siya. It's been years, but all he has been is just.. constant. Sure, he bullies me just like what my kuyas do, but he cares for me a lot, too. I guess he's seen how my dad and my brothers have treated me since we were kids, kaya alam na alam niya na rin lahat ng kailangan ko.
"Oh, by the way." He opened up his laptop. "Diba paborito mo Ben&Ben?"
Nanliit ang mga mata ko sa kaniya. "Yeah.."
"I heard this song and immediately thought of you. Figured you'd like it."
He waited for my reaction as the intro of Paninindigan Kita started playing. I chewed as I listened to its intro, and then I started chewing slower once I heard the lyrics.
Kakainis na ayaw mong maniwalang mahal kita
Ano pa bang kailangan kong patunayan sa'yo sinta
Pero naiintindihan ko naman, iniiwasan mo lang masaktan
Di ka madedehado kung sasagutin mo lang ako
Paninindigan kita, oo
Mamahalin kitang buong buo
Kahit sa pagtanda ako'y sa'yo
Paninindigan kita, oo
Anumang sabihin ng magulong mundo
Kahit ayaw nilang ako'y sayo
Ika'y iingatan ko
I nodded as the chorus finished. "Ah.."
"Ah." He nodded as well.
"Ganda, ah. Ganda ng beat."
He chuckled and took a piece of my liempo. "Ganda nga, 'no?"
I tried to suppress my smile, pero hindi ko kinaya. I scooted my chair closer to him and gave him a grin.
Kakakilig ka sa tuwing lumalapit ka na sinta
Nawawala ang angas ko, pilit man na itago pa
"What are you grinning about?" He chuckled as he opened his documents on his laptop.
Grabe kasi kung pano mo 'ko itahan
Kapag napupuno na'ko
Sa ingay ng paligid ikaw ang aking katahimikan
Truth is, I haven't listened to Ben&Ben in a long time, because their music just reminded me of.. bittersweet memories.
But now.. it's the first time I'm listening to them again with a heart that's not heavy.
"Sasamahan ka kahit na napapalibutan ng mga problema," Zeke mindlessly sang as he began typing.
"Mag-iintern ka na diba?" tanong ko sa kaniya.
"Hopefully," sagot niya. "Clerkship muna this year. Why?"
"Ahh." I nodded. "So hindi pa residente."
He tried to hide a smile, but I knew him too well to know that he already knew what I meant.
"Oo, eh. Clerkship, PGI, boards, residency. Tagal pa."
I cleared my throat and nodded while chewing again. "Tagal pa nga."
Tumawa siya at humarap sa akin. "Speaking of. My family's hosting a get-together in Ilocos this year. Do you want to come?"
"Huh?" Nanlaki mga mata ko. "Baliw! Family nga, eh. Edi hindi ako kasali doon."
"Inimbita kasi nina Mommy yung magulang mo, pati sina Gabe." He laughed. "Edi kasali ka na rin doon."
"Eh.." I grabbed my cup and drank the remaining water.
"It's cool if you're not up for it. I totally understand. No pressure."
Umiling ako. "I mean.. okay lang naman. Kung nandoon rin sina Kuya."
"So.. you'll go?"
Kumurap ako ng ilang beses bago tumango.
"Sure. Why not?"