Mentions of Blood, Angst, An Intense Injury that has quite a deep description. Also this does have Ao'nung x Neteyam mentioned. If you are against it, please leave.
I don't have room for Homophobia, and I don't want homophobes reading my work.
And before anyone argues that doesn't happen in Avatar, heres proof from the Avatar website: "Though it is typical for male Na'vi to choose a female mate, and vice versa, same-sex pairings are not uncommon and do not appear to be stigmatized in Na'vi culture."
This is 6000+ words and should be probably read in one sitting.
Muffled voices, that's the first thing she is aware of.
Second, it's the pain in her skull.
Third, light breaking through the darkness of her mind, her eyes opening.
And lastly, hands holding her, and her queue.
Her eyes blink open, and she realizes quickly she is not back with her friends, that the ship wasn't all a dream, but a reality.
"Look who's awake." An avatar speaks, tattoos littering her body, holding tightly onto the girls queue.
Esmyrie just gives her a hiss, not daring to show the fear that is in her heart.
Esmyrie may not understand them, but she can tell from their mannerisms that they aren't kind, and that they aren't looking out for her well being.
She feels herself getting dragged, her feet under her trying to stop herself from being forced to follow, but it's a useless attempt. They are stronger than her, by a lot.
She is pushed to her knees and her head hits the metal deck harshly, making her vision dizzy from the impact her head has already gotten.
"Quaritch, we got another, you want her with the other two?" The avatar that just pushed her to the ground asks.
Esmyrie tries to crawl away, seeing many dead humans around her, and with them, guns, but she gets kicked in the gut at her attempt.
The man, Quaritch, walks over to them, and Esmyrie sends him a glare, baring her teeth at the avatar. The man however doesn't seem scared by her threats, and crouches down towards her, grabbing her queue tightly, forcing her head up to be level with him.
"Damn, did quite the number on her already." Quaritch pokes his free hand at the wound on her forehead, making Esmyrie jerk back.
"Found her, the Sully's sons, and Spider trying to escape. Think we got a good shot on one of them." A male avatar speaks up.
Esmyrie sees how the mans expression changes from loss to pride. He looked like he was accepting the losing battle, but whatever the avatar just said seemed to make him cheer up, as if he had just heard great news.
"You hear that, princess? One of your friends got shot." Quaritch now speaks in Na'vi, knowing the words will sting the girl.
Esmyrie bites her lip harshly. She wouldn't believe his words. She won't believe his words. Not when she was so sure she saved Neteyam, not when she believed her sacrifice would be worth it.
"I'm not your princess, asshole." Esmyrie grits out, her queue getting tugged tightly at her words.
"She's sure sassy, I can see why one of the boys would like that. Say, how would you feel if I killed your mate? Huh? Would that get you to stop fighting?" Quaritch asks, and the girl lunges at him.
They can threaten with her life all they want, but the moment they bring Lo'ak into this, that's when they made a mistake.
"You touch him. I kill you." Esmyrie hisses out, grabbing at his hand that holds her queue, digging her nails into his arm.
Quaritch lets go of her momentarily, and Esmyrie uses that movement to climb to her feet and push him away. She tries to run for one of the guns on the deck, and gets her fingers around it, just as she is pulled back by one of the avatars.
"Oh no you don't." The male avatar says, slamming his knee into her gut.
She doesn't let go of the gun though, and she tries to rack her mind on how to use it. Sure, she was familiar with them because of Jake and her father using them during heists, but she has never held one or fired one before.
She instead just points it, remembering what Neteyam did, and moves her hand to the trigger, pointing it directly at Quaritch who is just now getting his balance back.
"Move. Or I shot." Her English is terrible, she isn't even sure if she said the right words, but she can briefly see the avatars falter when they see a gun pointed at their leader.
Quaritch seems to laugh at her voice and threat, thinking it was empty and begins to order the avatar that just kneed her to grab her.
She gives off a warning shot towards Quaritch and that makes the avatar stop.
"I kill you. Easy." Her accent comes through at her words, and she smirks when she sees the slight fear in their eyes. Good, she thinks.
They all stand there. Quaritch with his hands up slightly to show no harm, the male avatar close to her, but not daring to move as her gun is aimed at his leader, and the female avatar seeing the whole thing interested, grabbing her gun and pointing it towards Esmyrie.
"No. You drop the gun, or I kill you." The female says in broken Na'vi, and Esmyrie sends her a hiss.
She is at a standstill. She doesn't know what to do. If she kills Quaritch she will be dead. If she lets go though, they could break their promise and still kill her.
"Drop the gun." Quaritch warns, starting to move closer to her.
Esmyrie grits her teeth, her eyes moving from him to the two avatars, debating in her head what to do. She accepted her death days ago. She would save Neteyam, for her own life. But now, now she has no clue if she did. She has no clue if he is alive.
Is she really about to let herself die without knowing the answer to that?
She briefly looks up to the sky, Eclipse will be starting soon, and she decides now would be a good time to let Eywa take her.
She shoots a round at Quaritch, and just as quick as the bullet goes off, she is grabbed by the male avatar, the female avatar with tattoos kicking the gun out of her hand.
Esmyrie feels pride in the fact the bullet hit. She has no idea if the shot is fatal, but it hit, and wounding the man that threatened to kill her mate was enough to make her feel satisfied.
She struggles in the avatars grip, kicking, punching, yelling, try to get any of the hands that are on her off, but her attempts seem useless, and she stops when a knife is towards her neck, drawing blood.
"You alright, sir?" The male avatar says, holding tightly onto the girls head, his knife digging into skin.
"Fine. Just my shoulder. Give her to me." He grits out, his hand moving to cover his wound.
The male avatar pushes the girl towards Quaritch, and Esmyrie falls to the ground, the world spinning around her, the pain in her head beginning to come to light.
Quaritch grabs her by the queue, pulling her up, making the girl reach her arms to try and pull his hands off her.
"Remember when I said she means nothing? That Jake wouldn't care if she died? Well lets just see, don't we?" Quaritch says, and it seems to be the last words Esmyrie understands.
She vaguely sees the metal coming towards her, but beyond that she doesn't know.
A scream tears through her throat, and her body hits the floor a second after.
At first, she just feels numb.
Numb.
Numb.
Numb.
And then it comes in a crashing wave like a Tsunami.
It starts at her toes, a slight tingle of pain, and it rises from her toes to her torso. The slight tingling soon starts to turn into a burn, as if her body is too close to fire. Than the fire moves from her torso to her brain, and it's then she feels an excuciating pain she has never felt before.
And then she feels the loss. Her connection with the world slipping. Her connection with Lo'ak leaving her. The pain enters her again.
It's like her brain is getting electrified. As if her brain is getting sent a million signals, only to be fried, over and over and over again. The feeling is overwhelming, flooding through her as if she is drowning.
She briefly is aware someone is talking, but the words come on deaf ears. Her body begins to be lifted, but there is no fight in her left.
She is pretty sure she is spasming, possibly even having a seizure.
The pain only worsens with each second that passes.
It's like every cell in her body is exploding only to recreate itself and explode again. The atoms in her body feel like they are fighting one another, but one never wins.
The last thing she sees through the blur of tears, is a white braid getting thrown to the ground, blood leaking from a metal knife, and then her eyes close.
She feels her body get thrown, and than cold icy water surrounds her, her blood mixing with the water.
-=-
Neteyam is grateful for Tsireya's presence. She is kind, incredibly so, and is trying to use all her knowledge she knows of injuries to make him comfortable.
"I'm sorry we dragged you into this. Your parents must be worried." Neteyam apologizes, his eyes casting out to the sea, staying on the ship where his family is.
"I saw them, before I got an Ilu and came to rescue you guys. I gave them a thumbs up, they seemed relieved to see me safe. They know I can handle my own." Tsireya says, moving Neteyam so his back is leaning towards a rock instead of him just needing to use his body weight to keep him up.
Neteyam hums, his eyes moving towards her briefly.
"Ao'nung? Is he safe? Roxto too?" Neteyam asks, his mind replaying the events that happened today, and how Ao'nung and Roxto also got dragged into this.
"They are both safe. Ao'nung was with my father. Roxto with them."
"Okay good. Good." Neteyam says, his gaze returning to the ocean and ship.
He wishes he could help. He would be there if he could. But he knows he would just slow everyone down, and that he would probably make someone get hurt.
"You know, you should tell him." Tsireya says after a moment, catching Neteyam off guard.
"What?"
"Ao'nung. You should tell him how you feel." Tsireya encourages.
"I don't feel anything for him." Neteyam denies, shaking his head in denial.
"I know my brother. He doesn't open up, which is why he did what he did when you guys first arrived. I know it doesn't make it okay... he is a kind person." Tsireya tries to reason.
"If he was kind he wouldn't of abandoned my baby brother."
"You're right. And he feels sorry for that. It's the reason he is trying his best to hangout with you all now. He is bad at apologies so he tries to apologize through actions instead." Tsireya explains.
"Why are we talking about this?" Neteyam asks.
He understands she is trying to get his mind off his pain, but bringing in Ao'nung isn't the best idea right now. Not for him atleast.
"I'm just saying... my parents wouldn't mind." Tsireya shrugs.
"Tsireya..." Neteyam shakes his head.
"He told me, about your guys kiss.... He is upset you have been avoiding him." Tsireya whispers.
Neteyams eyes snap to her, a small blush forming on his cheeks, before he shakes his head and moves his gaze back to the water. His eyes briefly catch on some light, but he doesn't think much into it, thinking it is a piece of metal.
"It wouldn't work." Neteyam says, shaking his head, his eyes continuing to stay on the lighting piece of metal.
"Why not? We have many couples l-"
"-Yes, I know. I'm... I don't know how humans think about pairings like that... My dad may be Na'vi now, but at one point was human. I don't want to upset him." Neteyam argues.
He isn't upset with the fact it happened. He doesn't regret it. And he isn't ashamed of who it was with. He just doesn't know how humans think, and the thought of his father not accepting it like Na'vi do, terrifies him.
"Netey-"
"What is that?" Neteyam interrupts, pointing to the piece of glowing metal one more.
It is still off in the distance but the more he looks at it, the less and less the shape looks metal, but Na'vi. And the glowing doesn't look like it was caused by the moonlight, but by fish instead. His eyes briefly catch the color white, and-
"Shit! That's Esmyrie!" Neteyam yells, instantly getting to his feet, wobbling from the blood loss.
"Neteyam! Careful!" Tsireya yells, going to his aid, her eyes moving to the figure in the water, who is slowly getting pushed towards them from glowing fish.
Neteyam shakes his head, worries beginning to enter his mind. She shouldn't be out in this water, not with metal everywhere. And she looks as if she isn't breathing or moving.
Neteyam doesn't care about the pain he feels from his wound, he jumps into the water, swimming towards the girl, his one thought being to rescue her, save her.
Save her like she saved me. Its all Neteyam can think.
When he reaches her, he is thankful her face is above water and not below, meaning if she was breathing she was inhaling air and not water.
But the blood. There is so much blood surrounding her and he doesn't know what's causing it.
"Tsireya! Help! Help!" Neteyam yells, his feet kicking.
The fish now leave her, leaving him to hold himself up, with only one good arm, which he is using to hold Esmyrie, and his feet which kick the water as best he can to keep them afloat.
Tsireya instantly moves towards the two, giving Neteyam a hand and pulling him towards the rocks, allowing his feet to touch surface.
"Oh Eywa. There's so much blood." Neteyam cries out, his eyes searching for a wound but he doesn't find one.
There is no bullet wound, no scratches. No impaling from a knife.
No bullet wound.
No scratches.
No impaling from a knife.
No queue.
No queue.
Neteyams eyes widen when he looks towards the girls hair. Her white hair that always shines so bright now being painted red at the ends. Her braid, which once was there, now being gone, just leaving a stump where her queue should be.
It's bleeding, heavily, the muscle that was cut off her leaving traces on blood on the girls back, arms, and dripping onto him as he holds her.
He looks towards Tsireya for guidance, doing his best to move himself up the rocks and Esmyrie as gently as he can.
When he gets away from the water, he moves the girl to her side, his hands shaking, hovering over the girls body but not knowing what to do.
She is breathing, but her body is spasming, and groans are escaping her lips.
"What do I do?!" Neteyam pleads desperately, looking towards Tsireya who looks like she is going to be sick.
Neteyam understands, as he feels like he is going to be sick himself. His torso and arms are covered in the girls blood, and he has never heard of an act this violent before.
"I... I don't know. I don't know. I'm sorry." Tsireya cries, never hearing such a injury.
Neteyam tries to calm Esmyrie down, but every touch seems to hurt, and it makes Neteyam feel useless. He doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know how to save her.
"Tsireya... I, I need you to go back to the village." Neteyam says, making up his mind.
"What?!"
"I need you to go back to the village." He has to swallow a lump in his throat when he hears one of Esmyrie's cries. "I need you to go back to the village and warn your mother what happened. She needs to be prepared for when Esmyrie returns, so she has the right medicines ready." Neteyam says, his voice shaking.
"But... will she make it? I... shouldn't we take her there?" Tsireya asks.
"I... I don't know if it's good to move her anymore. I don't want to risk her going into shock or having a seizure.... My mom... she will know what to do. She will know how to hold the wound and move her safely. Please... Please go to the village and warn your mother. I'll... I'll try my best to stop the bleeding until my mom gets here." Neteyam explains, his heart rapidly beating.
Tsireya seems to weight the option. She doesn't want to leave and have Esmyrie die, but if Esmyrie does make it back to the village and her mother isn't prepared, it could be for nothing.
"Okay... Okay. I'll.... Make sure to keep pressure on the wound as best you can..." Tsireya says, hands shaking as she calls an Ilu, her mind trying to form words on how she will explain this to her mother.
"Please. Please hurry. My parents will be here soon... i'm sure of it." Neteyam says, crouching down towards the injured girl, his hands hovering over the girl once more.
"Okay..." Tsireya gives him a firm nod, calling the Ilu to move, and she is off, heading towards the village to warn her mother of the girls injuries.
When Tsireya leaves it makes everything feel so real, and Neteyam swallows his fears as best he can, moving his hands to the stump where her queue should be.
His touch on the girls queue instantly makes the girl cry out, her eyes opening wide in fear.
"I know, I know, I know. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm trying to help. You're going to get some help." Neteyam says, his eyes moving from the girl to the ship, praying his parents and family will return soon.
Esmyrie tries to pull the boys hands away, memories of Quaritch holding onto her queue entering her mind.
"G-get off m-me!" Esmyrie yells, trying and pulling at an arm.
Neteyam grits at the girls force, her happening to grab his injured arm which has a broken collarbone.
"Hey! Hey! It's me! It's Neteyam!" Neteyam cries out, swatting the girls hands away as gently as he can, his hands moving back to her wound, causing the girl to flinch and let out a cry.
Neteyam never wants to hear those sounds ago. The true amount of torture and suffering the girl has continuing to ring in his ears as he tries to comfort her.
"N-Neteyam?" Esmyrie asks, trying to distract her mind from the pain.
"I'm here. I'm here." Neteyam mumbles, moving to place a kiss on her forehead, his heart hammering in his chest.
She begins spasming again, and all he can do is watch as his sister cries in agony.
-=-
He found his father. Lo'ak found his father. He was drowning, sinking with the boat, but he found him.
'Neteyam' his fathers voice cried out, and if Lo'ak were in a good mental state, those words would of hurt more.
But instead his focus was on bringing his father back to the surface so he can find Esmyrie. He found his father so surely he could find Esmyrie.
He had to find Esmyrie, he wouldn't stop until he did.
He keeps kicking, holding onto his dad as his father struggles to swim, and Payakan is there to rescue him once more.
The animal allowing his fin to the boy, letting the father and son hold onto him, as he helps bring them to the surface.
When they break water, his father is gasping for breath, and Lo'ak is trying his best to reassure his father while also looking around for any signs of Esmyrie.
He didn't make it in time, is all Lo'ak can think.
He made it to the ship a little too late, and that reality pains him.
"Thank you." Lo'ak says, going to hug Payakan.
He feels his father touch his shoulder, and his focus moves from the Tulkun to his father, hope in his eyes that his father possibly found Esmyrie.
"I see you, son." Jake says, his words sounding so true.
Lo'ak feels his heart stop for a second. He was seen. He was finally seen by his father, but what would the point be, if he isn't seen by Esmyrie? Esmyrie is the one that needs to see him. Esmyrie is the only one he needs to hear those words from over and over again.
"I need to find her. I need to find her." Lo'ak mumbles over and over, going and diving back into the water, almost escaping until he feels arms on his waist, dragging him back onto the Tulkun.
Lo'ak lets out a cry once he surfaces, his eyes frantically trying to look into the water, to see if there is any sign of Esmyrie. And then he is desperately trying to push his dad off him. His dad is stopping him from finding Esmyrie.
"Let go! Dad! Damnit! Let go!" Lo'ak cries, but Jake shakes his head, holding on tighter to the boy.
"Son! Son! Listen to me! Stop! Stop!" Jake yells, his other hand moving to hold his sons jaw, "Son, she isn't down there.... even if she was she is gone."
"No! Fuck that! Fuck that! I'll find her! I'll find her!" Lo'ak cries out, his eyes moving from the ocean to the metal floating around them.
"Son! She wasn't on the ship!"
"What?"
"You mother and I searched the entire ship when we were taking out avatars and humans. She wasn't there!"
"No! No! She... she had to be. She.... she's down there dad! She is down in the boat and we are letting her drown!" Lo'ak begins pushing at his fathers arm, his body frantically trying to get back into the water to dive down and find her.
Jake doesn't let go. As much as it pains him, he knows his son would die down there trying to find the girl. His son would make himself drown, not surfacing for air until her found her, and there was no body to be found.
He won't allow himself to lose one of his children.
"Dad...please... Please!" Lo'ak is crying, sobs shaking his body, the hard truth setting in that he could, in fact, of lost his mate.
"Ma Jake!" Neytiri yells, surfacing the water with Kiri and Tuk.
Lo'aks eyes widen at his mothers voice, hope entering his mind that Esmyrie is possibly with his mother, but when three heads pop up, and not four, his eyes soften again, moving down to stare blankly at the water.
He takes a deep breath in.
One,
two,
three times.
And accepts defeat, reaching his hand out towards his sisters, helping pull Kiri towards him.
And there they stay, Payakan being the thing that holds them all up. Neytiri cupping Lo'aks hand briefly, before moving her eyes towards her daughters.
Silence... Silence...and then a yell.
"Mom! Dad! Help me!" The voice is easily Neteyams and the families eyes widen in fear, Lo'ak quickly instructing Payakan to head towards the sound.
His eyes briefly move towards the wreckage of the boat, and he promises once his family makes it to shore, he will dive down and find Esmyrie.
"Dad! Please, I don't know what to do!" Neteyams voice becomes more clear, sounding heartbroken.
And as much as it pains Lo'ak, the fear in his brothers voice makes his eyes move from the water to his brother, only to widen at the scene before him.
His Esmyrie.
His love.
She's here!
"Esmyrie!" Lo'ak shouts in joy, jumping off the Tulkun, quickly running towards them.
He doesn't pay attention to the blood, thinking it's from his brothers wrapped wound, he doesn't pay attention to his brothers cries, he assumes its from the pain.
His focus is Esmyrie. His beautiful, sweet Esmyrie.
He stops in his tracks though when she doesn't respond to his yell.
And then his eyes focus more on the sight before him. She is shaking, looks deathly pale, and is groaning in pain. And the blood. There is so much of it. Too much to just be Neteyams.
"No no no no no." Lo'ak can briefly hear Jake mumble, running towards the girls side.
But Lo'ak still stands there, shock taking over him.
He hears the cries of Tuk, and how Kiri goes to lift his sister, mumbling something about 'don't look'. And then both his parents are at Neteyam and Esmyrie's side.
"What happened?" Jake asks Neteyam.
"I... dad I.... help me." Neteyam says, the only words that are able to escape his mouth.
Jake takes the girl from Neteyam, his eyes moving to assess the damage.
No bullet wounds.
No strikes from a knife.
Her head is bleeding from force.
No scatches.
Her hair is bloody.
No queue.
Jake has to step back, his mouth opening wide, looking towards the girls injury to his youngest son who is still in shock.
"Neytiri... I don't, I don't know how to help." Jake whispers.
And its a painful reality. He doesn't know how to help. This injury, this is beyond his knowledge. Stab wounds, bullet wounds, broken bones, that he knows, that he has seen. But this... this is... this is just cruel.
His eyes turn to Neytiri, but she just shakes her head, looks being exchanged with Jake that mean 'her wound is too fatal'.
"Oh God." Jake mumbles, his brain so out of it he says the wrong deity.
Any other time Neytiri would tease him and Neteyam would question his words, but instead it's just eerily quiet besides the girls cries.
She is grieving because she is pain. But she is also grieving for all that was just taken from her. She will never be able to connect with an Ikran or Ilu once again. She will never be able to connect to the Tree of Souls. She will never be able to gain consiousness from her fellow Ancestors. She will never be able to mate again.
It's a fate worse than death.
"Dad... dad what are you doing.... help her." Neteyam cries out, looking desperately towards his mother and father for help.
His eyes briefly catch Lo'aks, but Lo'ak is standing there, shaking, eyes glazed over. He looks mad, like he has gone insane.
"Son... I..." Jake takes a deep inhale in, trying to find the right words to say. "You need to say your goodbyes while you can."
The confession seems to break Lo'ak out of his trance, and he is instantly running towards the girl, pushing his father out of the way, putting her head in his lap.
"Esmyrie... Esmyrie?" Lo'ak asks, shaking the girl.
"I'm here... I'm st-still here." The girl groans out.
"We are going to get you some help." Lo'ak tries to reassure, looking towards his mother for confirmation, but she just stands there sadly, one of her arms draped over Kiri's shoulder, holding his sister as she sobs.
Esmyrie knows her fate. She knows there is no saving this. Jake's words were enough for her to know that time was running out, and fast.
"No... no...." Esmyrie shakes her head.
"Dad... Dad we are getting help... right?" Lo'ak asks, ignoring the girls words.
"Lo'ak..." Jake says the boys name so softly, too softly to mean anything good.
"No.. No no no!" Lo'ak is now moving the girl gently off him, moving towards his father in anger. "Save her dad! Save her!" Lo'ak cries.
Neteyam can sense that Esmyrie is suffering, her breathing going rapidly, trying to hold onto the little life she has left, wanting a proper goodbye with everyone before she goes. It seems Jake notices it too.
"Lo'ak.... Lo'ak. Son, son! Listen to me! Listen to me! We need to say are goodbyes... I know I know, I'm sorry, I'm sorry but.... we still have time to say goodbye. Okay....?" Jake is shaking the boy, trying to get his words to make sense in his sons mind.
It seems they do after a few seconds, and Lo'ak crashes to the ground, Jake being the only thing that makes his sons knees not dig into the rocks.
Jake gives Neteyam a firm nod, and Neteyam understands it, a confirmation from his father that it's his turn to say goodbye.
"Esmyrie... Esmyrie." Neteyam says, moving the girl gently, letting her head rest in his lap so her eyes can focus on him.
The movement causes the girl to wince and he apologizes, tears forming in his eyes and falling rapidly.
"Hi Netty." Esmyrie tries to lighten the mood, the nickname falling off her lips making Neteyam cry more.
"Hey dumb butt." Neteyam jokes with her, sniffling, his voice breaking.
She gives him the best smile she can muster through the pain, being the encouraging look Neteyam needs to say his goodbye.
"I'm so sorry I couldn't save you.... I'm so sorry... I'm sorry you never got to see your fathers stuff in the basket I made. I'm sorry for the argument we had.... But I want you to know, your my sister. Okay? Your my little sister and I love you so damn much. I would do anything to give you another piggyback ride or to play warriors again. You saved my life, you will always be more mighty of a warrior than me, sis." Neteyam cries out, kissing the girls forehead gently, moving his hands to rub up and down her arms in a soothing manner.
"And you'll always b-be the b-best big b-brother ever." Esmyrie whispers out, causing Neteyam to cry more. "And do-don't feel sorry... do-don't blame yourself." Esmyrie says through a forced smile.
Neteyam nods as best he can, giving her one last kiss to the forehead, keeping his lips there longer than before, knowing it's the last time he will do that brotherly gesture.
When he lets go, he moves his gaze towards Kiri, but Kiri shakes her head, pointing towards Tuk who is crying in her shoulder. Neteyam understands and moves towards his mother, who slowly takes Neteyams place.
"My sweet child... I love you so much, as if you were my own." Neytiri tries to soothe the girl, moving her arms towards the girls neck, helping lift the pressure the wound was getting. "You are so brave... so brave and strong. I know your parents are so proud of you." Neytiri whispers, placing a gentle kiss on the girls cheek.
She turns towards Jake, as she can feel the girls strength beginning to give, knowing Lo'ak and Jake still deserve to say their goodbyes.
Jake nods, kissing his sons head who is sobbing onto the rocks, moving as quick as he can towards the girl, hoping to make his goodbye quick so Lo'ak can be the last with her when she goes.
"Hey Esmyrie...." Jake starts out, swallowing the guilt that has built up in his throat.
"U-uncle Jake." Those words alone break Jake.
Never, never has she called him those words, and now, after the 15 years he has known her, she finally does, but it's through her last moments with him, and it makes him hurt all the more, knowing he failed his brother Nilar, and his niece Esmyrie.
"You saved my sons life. I owe you all I own and more.... You don't know how grateful I am for that." Jake says, grabbing the girls hands in his own.
"O-of course. Sully's stick to-together... and I'm just a-a nobody." Esmyrie says and Jake shakes his head frantically.
"No.. No. No you aren't a nobody. I should of never, ever banished you. I will live with that guilt for the rest of my life...." Jake says, looking towards his wrist, letting go of the girls hands quickly, beginning to detach a bracelet of his.
Esmyrie watches his movements carefully, trying to force her mind to keep fighting. Keep fighting. She sees the beads, her beads, the same ones Jake cut all those months ago.
"I... I was going to return these on your birthday, but I... Now is the best time." Jake whispers, seeing the girls eyes briefly light up at them.
Jake takes that as a good sign, and helps braid the beads back into her hair, which is matted and full of dried blood.
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry for Nilar... I'm sorry I didn't return him to Eywa... I'm sorry I didn't protect you."
"Jake... It's okay... thank y-you... f-for the beads. I get to l-look more me when I pass." Esmyrie says, giving him a true smile, and he nods his head, moving to kiss each of her hands, giving that as his goodbye.
He looks towards his family.
Neteyam, Kiri, and Tuk all crying with their mother, and Lo'ak, continuing to cry by himself, his forehead to the rocks as sobs shake his body.
When he turns to Esmyrie he can see her breath is getting weaker. She doesn't have much time left.
"Lo'ak." Jake says, moving towards his youngest son.
"No... it's not true... this is just a bad dream. This is just a bad dream." Lo'ak cries.
"Son... Look at me. Please." Jake pleads, his hands moving towards his sons jaw, forcing his son to look at him.
Lo'ak looks like a wreck, his eyes are red, his cheeks tear stained, his hands shaking.
"Be with Esmyrie..." Jake whispers, and his words meet Lo'aks ears, causing the boy to cry out more.
But his son listens, crawling over towards the girl, his hands shaking as he takes her in his arms.
"My love?" Lo'ak asks timidly, letting the tears fall without a say.
Esmyrie looks at his eyes. His sweet eyes. The eyes of her first and only love. This is a good way to die, she thinks.
"Hi Lilac." Esmyrie jokes, moving her hands to hold onto his extra finger on each hand.
The nickname makes the boy cry, his head moving towards her shoulder in anguish.
"I love you. I love you so much. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you. My job is to protect and I... I failed you. I'm sorry... I'm so sorry.... We still had so much time.... My beautiful Esmyrie, you are still so beautiful."
"Think short hair suits me?" Esmyrie tries to joke, coughing up blood, making the boy panic.
"You would look beautiful with no hair... I want you to know I'm so proud of you. Okay? I... I want you to not be afraid. I'm here. I'll be here the entire time, okay? And I ... I want you to know I would do anything to take your place. I would do anything to take your pain." Lo'ak cries out.
Esmyrie's breath is getting weaker, and the strong look Lo'ak is giving her begins to crack.
"We still have so much time. You still need to see the painting I made you. It isn't good... but you know my shit painting skills... and, Kaew... we still need to meet Kaew and the other four trouble makers you said we were going to have. But, I understand if it hurts. Okay? I understand if you don't want to hold on anymore. I'll understand and I won't blame you." Lo'ak cries out, his walls breaking to leave the image of what he is, a man who is losing his mate.
Esmyrie moves her hand to his cheek, cupping it with all the strength she has.
"I love yo-you. I love you, Ma Lo'ak." Esmyrie whispers, her eyes frantically moving from his face to the sky, Eclipse almost over.
Love.... they love eachother and their love story is so painful.
"Goodnight, Love." Esmyrie whispers, her hand dropping from his cheek to hold his hand.
Lo'ak can feel her leaving him, her breath getting slower and slower and his lets out a cry no one should have to experience.
"I'm here my love. I'm here.... you can stop fighting... It's okay. It's okay. I love you, I love you." He pulls her closer to him. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I'm here now, I'm not going anywhere. It's okay... It's okay. You fought so well... so well."
Lo'ak pulls her into a kiss, one he knows will be their last, and tries to put all the love he has for her into the kiss.
When he pulls away her eyes are staring at him blankly.
"Ma Esmyrie? My love? Please.... No no no no no... My love!?" Lo'ak sobs, yells shaking his body.
She can briefly hear his yells for her, but her soul is done fighter, no fight left in her body. She feels safe in her lovers arms, knowing he will watch over her and she can watch over him.
She lets death grip her tight, as if she was reuniting with a close friend.
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Uh...... So..... yeah....
Please don't try and find my address and kill me! This made me sob.... like I was legit sobbing writing this....
Uh.... anyways....
there is one chapter left and than the epilogue so please don't hate me too much, I would love for you all to finish this book as it holds a lot of importance to me and I think you will like the ending.
And is Esmyrie truly gone??? you need to finish the book to find out