A/N: mentions of death - suicide and many more heavy topics...
Jade tried hard to drown out the noise that rang in her head. She lay on the floor of the apartment - the one that seemingly was not hit with a single bomb that eventful day...
It had been a few days since the mission ended... All Jade could hear was Taps ringing throughout her skull...
Bradley lay on the floor next to her, AirPods also connected to Jade's iPhone... they lay on the floor of the apartment, both trying to drown out the noise of the Taps despite the fact they would be hearing them once again as they attended yet another funeral.
"Pink Floyd... The Wall... Again?" Bradley asked after what were hours of complete silence.
"It's how I feel Bradley... I need something that hits the soul... This does..." Jade sighed, turning over and laying her head on Bradley's chest as she turned the music down slightly and switches their air pods from noise canceling to transparency mode. She sighed as the song came to an end, "How are we going to get through this particular funeral? It's all three of our squadrons from that day... out of 29 personnel only... 11 of us survived... three from the 86ers, six from the daggers, and two from the dooms... Almost my entire squadron Bradley. I was a horrible leader"
Bradley rubbed Jade's back, "No, Jade you're not - they knew the risks, and you prepared them more than anyone. When you explained the mission you made it aware that most of them wouldn't come home. You couldn't have done any more, none of us could have."
The next song played...
Damn was this album really hitting today... and Jade knew that was not a good thing.
"I wonder how Natasha will be today... The poor thing..." Jade rambled on.
"I don't know how she'll get through it... And you? How are you feeling right now?" Bradley asked.
"Numb. I'm just so numb... I need to get out of this place for a long while. I think I'm taking medical leave..." Jade sighed.
"After all that - I think we're all taking medical leave..." Bradley sighed and looked down at his watch, "Look's about time for us to get up, We've got to be in dress blues today..."
Jade huffed and stood up, "Let's get dressed then, BB. After that, we're out of here. I don't think I can make it through another Taps, let alone be in this place for another night."
It only took an hour for Bradley and Jade to reach the graveyard where the ceremonies were to take place. There were eighteen caskets - closed of course - were lined up under. At the head of each of the caskets was a photo of each of the deceased pilots/rios/wsos.
Jade and Bradley walked side by side - not allowed to hold hands - as they viewed each casket.
The first is...
Ron Kerner: Callsign Slider. Top Gun Graduate of the Class of 86
Jade took a deep breath and placed a single rose from one of the bouquets she and Bradley held.
Jade tapped the coffin lightly, deciding to stay quiet for the time being. She would save her voice until later. As one of the mission squadron leaders, she was instructed to give a statement - as were Bradley and Pete.
They proceeded to the next coffin...
Lieutenant Val Sterman: Callsign Falcon
He had demanded no picture be at his funeral... said people who truly knew him would know his face. He also didn't want anyone to hurt more at the sight of him he also mentioned. Jade was grateful for this. He was the first member of her graduating class to die... Although she didn't know him well, Jade remembered all the times they got absolutely wasted together at the HardDeck... When they won in Beach soccer, he helped her to make the winning goal. She placed a rose on his casket as well.
The next casket hurt...
Lieutenant Marcus Jones: Callsign Broadway
He had also demanded no picture be at his funeral - he instead opted that his helmet be placed in its place... Jade let a tear fall. During her isolation at Penny's with her concussion - Jones had stayed and watched Broadway Bootlegs... I mean slime tutorials. Jones had crushed their plane into enemies to save Bradley. Jade would always be grateful to Marcus. Jade left a rose and a single tear on the casket.
The next two caskets were...
Lieutenant Dillon Tanks: Callsign Fox
and
Lieutenant Norbert Halman: Callsign Mayday
They also opted for no pictures but for their helmets to be on display. Jade and Bradley both remembered the time the two threw Bradley out of the bar - it was an "Overboard" situation. However, the two were anything but stable as they became plastered... So as Bradley was thrown out, the two were also thrown out as they dropped Bradley and fell face first in the sand. More roses were left on each casket - but these two made Bradley and Jade leave with smiles as well.
The next ten caskets were set down in pairs of two, seeing as they were all pilots with their backseaters...
The first pair were...
Charles Piper: Callsign Chipper
and
Marcus Williams: Callsign Sundown
Jade and Bradley's hearts ached... They were the Children of the Class of 86, Bradley more so Jade. Bradley let a tear slip down his face as he mourned the men who were like uncles to him. Jade let her hand rest on his shoulder. She knew this was hard for everyone, and it would be especially hard on him. They laid flowers down along with some more tears and continued on...
The next two were...
Lieutenant Harry Moreno: Callsign Wildcard
and
Lieutenant Edmond Watson: Callsign Tango
Jade let the tears flow heavily now... as she saw more and more of her fellow pilots dead. It hit her hard as she realized all the people she would have to give their wings to... How many she would have to stamp into caskets this afternoon... Bradley helped her lay the roses down as they continued to the next pair of caskets...
It was Bradley's turn to mourn at the next...
Neil Vikander: Callsign Omaha
and
Billy Avalone: Callsign Fritz
Bradley's head went down to look at the ground as tears streamed down his face. Jade said fuck it and held his hand. Knowing Bradley wouldn't have the strength to place the roses, Jade did it for him. She was careful not to rush him along...
As if the setup was to give them both emotional whiplash the next two were...
Lieutenant Thomas Burke: Callsign Malcolm
and
Lieutenant Mick Mallin: Callsign Miles
Jade was careful to keep herself together here as they approached the end of the caskets... she knew who was coming up and she simply needed to save the tears for them. She nodded toward each casket and set a rose on each. She and Bradley approached the next caskets, Bradley doing the same as Jade had done with these two.
The next two were...
Logan Lee: Callsign Yale
and
Birgham Lennox: Callsign Harvard
Both had opted for the helmet option as well... Bradley was quick to lay roses on their caskets. However, neither Jade nor Bradley felt they could move to the next set of Caskets...
The next two had the most tragic end...
that was...
Lieutenant Emma Petershaw: Callsign H2O
and
Lieutenant Jack Petershaw: Callsign Parrot
The picture of their caskets is what broke Jade down. She began sobbing into Bradley's uniform. Onlookers knew it wasn't proper of her to do... but they dared not mention anything. Jade had gone through so much - everyone did. At this point, everyone could agree to Fuck Formalities...
Emma was obviously Jade's best friend through graduation and was well on to be her best friend for life. She had so many memories between them... And how the two of them went down was something so tragic even Shakespeare couldn't write. As they crashed to their deaths, Jack proposed to her... he had said he wanted to wait until after the mission - to make sure they came back. This obviously hadn't happened the way he had planned. It broke Jade's heart even more when she realized this could easily be her and Bradley right now... Jade mustered up the courage to lay the roses down.
With two roses left... Bradley and Jade proceeded to the final casket, where they picked up Natasha. She looked horrible standing over the casket of...
Robert Floyd: Callsign Bob
Jade and Natasha held each other tightly. Jake came up behind Bradley and threw his arm around his shoulder. The men nodded to each other - saying what words never could. Natasha cried so hard into Jade, "That - he - Jade he was my backseater... my responsibility... How am I supposed to look his family in the eye today?!" She sobbed.
Jade looked around the gravesites... that's when she spotted him. Jade looked to Bradley and Jake, "Boys - go get Admiral Mitchell for me? I think Natasha might need some advice from someone who's been in her shoes"
The boys nodded, Bradley quickly laid his rose on Bob's casket, "I'll miss ya Bobby Boy. Best man out of all of us." The two then left to get Pete Mitchell.
Jade stayed holding Natasha. She rubbed circles into her back, "It's all right Nat - The boys are gonna get Mav and all will be ... well, he'll help ya out, okay?" Natasha simply nodded.
Mav was beside Jade and Natasha as soon as the boys had explained what was going on, "Come here Natasha," Mav led the girls away from the casket and to a few chairs in the front row. Natasha looked at Bob's casket - almost refusing to move too far away from him.
Mav held Natasha's right hand and Jade held her left, "Nat," Maverick started, "It won't be easy to get over this - I won't lie to you. It'll hurt more than any bullet or bomb. Some nights you'll wake up screaming wishing to be put to death right then and there. You'll want life to end = you'll wish the universe had taken you instead. The survivor's guilt will hit and it'll hit hard kid. I won't lie to you. It'll take years and even decades to get over... but he'll be waiting to fly with you again when you go too."
Nat nodded, "Thank you Maverick, means a lot to have you around now" She tried to laugh but failed.
"We're not going anywhere Nat, neither are you" Jade stated firmly.
"I know - and Thank You for, talking me out of, well that yesterday..." She mumbled to Jade.
Jade squeezed Nat's hand, "Of course! We had an even number of caskets and you know damn well I would have hated the odd number and would have followed you dumbass" This made Nat laugh - Jade was traumatized, making her the best at comic relief.
"Excuse me are you - Phoneix?" An older couple asked - about Maverick's age.
"Yes," Natasha let out a shaky breath, squeezing the two Mitchell's hands.
"We're Mr. and Mrs Floyd... Robert's parents. Sweetheart, we want to see how you are doing... How you're holding up, we'd like to invite you to dinner too. We understand it might be a little hard to be around us at the moment - but our little Bob talked so much about you, we feel like you're our child as well. We know you must be going through a tough time losing him - we want you to know that we don't hold you at fault whatsoever, and our door is always open to you. We'll let you be, you don't owe us any explanation sweet -" Natasha cut off Mrs. Floyd by hugging her and sobbing.
Natasha sobbed into Bob's mother, "I am so so sorry, I tried I really did - the - the" She sobbed.
Mrs. Floyd held the sobbing pilot in her arms, and Mr.Floyd even offered her his bandana for her tears. Natasha gladly accepted the offer.
Seeing as they should probably give the three some time - the Mitchells left to go join up with Bradley and Cyclone in the middle of all the caskets. The Taps began to play as the four stood in line by rank.
As the Taps played, all four of them proceeded to each of the caskets - folding up flags and handing them to the dead family members. The four then returned to their previous spots where they would be giving their words.
However, the first to give her words was the pilot of Robert Floyd. Natasha stood in front of the four. She took a deep breath before beginning, "Robert Floyd - was easily the best backseater I've ever had as a pilot. But - he was not only my backseater, he was my best friend. Which makes today probably the hardest day of my life... I am lucky to have another great pilot help me through this event, as I am not the only pilot to tragically lose a backseater - their best friend. So thank you Maverick, for helping me through this. It's greatly appreciated. Bob was a true light, a goofball, a dork... I know I speak for everyone when I say that he was quite literally the glue holding us all together. Sometimes I wondered if he was actually meant to be on this dark earth when he was such a light to us all. Today - while we lose a great WSO and friend here on the ground, the sky gains another permanent resident. Today we put him in the ground so he can do what he loved forever in the sky, amongst the clouds. And finally to Mr. and Mrs. Floyd - thank you for entrusting me with your son's life, and thank you for forgiving me. Please know that if I could trade places with Bob, I would. As would anyone in these three squadrons and arguably the Navy as a whole," she turned to look back at Bob's casket, "Thank you for flying with my bestie."
She then went to sit down. Admiral Beau spoke next, "Thank you for the wonderful words Natasha, again sorry for the informalities of today - there will be many of them. Many of our survivors are out on medical leave for obvious reasons, so despite the military formality - this is how this event will turn out. So now that has been said a few words from me and the others who stand before you." Admiral Beau then continued, "Each of the individuals that we place in the ground today was an essential part of the survival of the world. They prevented a global disaster. Be assured their death was not in vain. They will be forever missed..."
Pete took this as his opportunity to speak, "That is agreed with Beau... Natasha, I feel serious empathy for you in this situation, and I am so sorry you had to go through this. I wish this on nobody... As for the ones who died. I had the pleasure of being defeated for the Top Gun Trophy back in 86 by Ron Kerner. Although it is sad to see another one of my close friends from school leave this earth - I know Tom Kazansky is just delighted to have his RIO back In the sky with him. Chipper and Sundown - well they were there for me after my RIO and best friend died... Sundown was the only reason I was able to graduate Top Gun, he ensured I had enough points to graduate before I dropped out. The rest of the individuals we put in the ground today - I had the pleasure to train at Top Gun... They truly were the best of their generation and the best people I have ever known. Since the Dagger mission last year and this semester at Top Gun; all of these individuals spent endless amounts of time at my home. Especially after my daughter and godson's fatal accident this year. They all have become like my own children in my eyes, they weren't just pilots and backseaters... they were my backseaters and pilots. It deeply pains me at their loss."
Bradley stepped up next, "I was a leader of the Dagger Squad on this mission... only six of my nine members survived compared to the three of the 86ers and the two of the Doom squadron. I don't like to leave anyone behind, however, I see now that I am not leaving them behind. I am allowing them to join the greatest pilots and backseaters in the sky. They will finally be able to be free, and to fly without the fear of death lingering around every corner. I will deeply miss, Omaha, Yale, Harvard, Fritz... Bob" Bradley's voice cracked, "But I will forever remember that they wait for me - and everyone else here to join them in the sky, for a rematch dogfight of course" This had many chuckles.
Jade took a deep breath, "Hello, I am Jade Mitchell... Mav's daughter. I was the leader of the Doom Squad. We had all just graduated Top Gun thirty-one days prior to the mission... Now only two members of our graduating class remain, me and Stealer-Norman Ray... To think that we were just cocky little show off a few months ago is simply... inconceivable. I -" Jade tried to look back at the caskets but simply was unable to as she began to sob once more, "I - Emma was my best friend, and her and Jack's love story is simply fucking tragic. I - I simply cannot express in words, anything at the moment."
Silence passed...
The first in the ground was Ron Kerner (Slider). Maverick slammed wings into the casket and saluted him as the casket was lowered into the ground.
The next was Val Sternman (Falcon). Jade slammed wings into the casket and saluted him as his casket was lowered into the ground.
Then Marcus Jones (Broadway). Jade now had slammed two wings into caskets and saluted two friends as they were lowered into the ground.
Then, Dillon Tanks ( Fox ) and Norbert Halman ( Mayday). These were the third and fourth wings Jade had slammed into caskets - and four caskets she had watched be lowered into the ground.
Then, Charles Piper (Chipper) and Marcus Williams (Sundown). Pete put two more wings in caskets as he watched two more friends be lowered into the ground.
Next was Harry Moreno ( Wildcard) and Edmond Watson (Tango). This marked the fifth and sixth wings and caskets for Jade... With each wing and casket, more of Jade's spirit diminished. She felt so... numb and defeated.
Next were Neil Vikander (Omaha) and Billy Avalone ( Fritz). Bradley put the wings in their caskets and saluted as they were lowered into the ground.
Then, Thomas Burke(Malcolm) and Mick Mallin(Miles). Wings seven and eight of the day for Jade... Jade felt just empty now. She was gone - she was ready to be done. Ready to go back to the apartment, pack up their stuff and move into their new home in San Fernando with Natasha and Jake. She needed this medical leave badly.
Next was Logan Lee (Yale) and Birgham Lennox (Harvard). Bradley had now placed and watched four squadron members lowered into the ground. He was not doing alright at the moment- he was much like Jade wishing to get the fuck out of this place.
Yale and Harvard were followed by Emma and Jack Petershaw (H2O and Parrot). This was wings nine and ten for Jade... She stumbled as she attempted to place Emma's wings in the casket. She fell to her knees as she lost the strength to put the wings in. Norman came up to her, helped her stand, and held the wings for her to hit down into the casket. Jade sobbed uncontrollably as she used her entire body weight to slam the wings into Emma's casket. She wanted to scream in agony - but her throat was so dry it was impossible. She stayed on the ground as the two were lowered.
The last one to be lowered into the ground was Robert Floyd. Natasha placed the wings in his casket. She didn't fall to the ground - but stood there for a long time before saluting and going back to sit down with Jake.
When the ceremony was announced over, many people came up to Jade and Bradley. They thanked them for their service and presented empathy over their losses. As the number of people dwindled out, Jake and Natasha approached Jade and Bradley.
Jake took Nat's hand, "You guys ready to get the hell out of dodge?" He asked.
Jade nodded, her eyes were - defeated. Bradley put his arm around her shoulder, "I think we all are Sersin. I gave you the address right?"
Jake nodded, "Yeah... We'll meet ya up there, when are ya planning on leaving?"
Jade sighed, "As soon as we step foot in that wretched apartment." She let a shiver run down her spine.
Nat let out a sigh of relief, "Thank the lord, I don't think I could spend another night here. We'll see you up there later then?"
Jade nodded, "Be warned though - I'm in my Pink Floyd Mindset. You won't be able to run away from the Wall" She tried a chuckle. It didn't sound right to anyone though - no one could be fooled now.
Nat smiled, "I think we're all right there with you Jade. See ya then" Her smile faltered.
"Yeah, there's just one last thing I've got to do before I - well, before we leave" Jade pulled a bag of quarters out of her pocket, it was 72 quarters. One for each of the four to lay a quarter on each of the graves.
They all laid quarters on the tombstones of their fellow squadron members - their friends. There were a few more tears, and a few more exchanged words before they all went their separate ways to begin their journey to their new home in San Fernando.
It had been a few hour drive - but it wasn't horrible. It was nice to be on the ground the two had decided.
When they arrived in their new place, there wasn't much to unpack - they had barely any furniture. They each only had what they could carry in their bags - and of course all of their work gear. Although, the two would not be returning to work for a very long while. They unpacked everything in their bedroom - Bradley had made it a point to at least bring a metal bed rack and buy one of those beds in a box. They weren't very comfortable, but it was fine for now.
There was a knock at the door - Nat and Jake had arrived. They also had little things with them, but they had done the same as Bradley and Jade with the bed situation. Jade quietly lead them to where their room was.
After everyone was settled in - they sat on the floor in the empty living room together, eating take-out Chinese food. No one said a word - as the silence and emptiness fell on them. Jake and Nat excused themselves for the night. Bradley and Jade stood in the kitchen cleaning what silverware they did have that they used for dinner.
Once finished, Bradley spun Jade around in his arms. So she now faced him. Then he began to sway with her in his arms. And so they stood there, swaying at two am in the kitchen.
"You're my everything, Jade" He whispered.
"As are you, Bradley, as are you" Jade hugged him tight as her arms were laced around his neck. The swaying stopped and they simply stood there in a tight embrace in the middle of their kitchen.
"I know this is probably the worst timing ever - but I can't lose you too" Bradley sighed, releasing one of his arms from around Jade.
Jade began to lean back to look up at him, "Bradley - what are you saying? Are you - really breaking up with me right now?". Her mind raced, there was no way this was happening. He couldn't really think this was okay to put her through right now.
"No, no" He urged, "Quite the opposite actually" He reached his hand into his back pocket, and dropped to one knee.
"Jade, we've waited long enough. We've been through literal hell and back. I love you so very much and I can't stand to risk losing you again without knowing you as Mrs. Bradley Bradshaw... So will you -"
Jade didn't even let him finish, "Yes, yes, yes, yes... hold on wait let me double check... hell yes!" She shouted.
"You didn't let me finish! Will you Marry me?" He asked. Jade nodded.
"Hell yeah, sign me up Commander, for forever!" She threw herself on him and kissed him deeply. Bradley slipped the ring on her finger - and they made their way back to their room to engage in activities they had already heard the other two previously engage in.