"... the gang named Neo Seoul which has been responsible for the spread of the drug notoriously known as Gold Dust. The Seoul Police Department has stated that..."
"Huh." Chaerin crosses her arms. "I wonder how much the police had to lie. This isn't even half of what actually happened."
"They didn't lie," Sera pipes in. "They just... omitted information."
I keep my gaze on the television, though my mind is somewhere else as the newscaster drones on about the case.
It has been a good two weeks since I was discharged from the hospital, yet all the news and media seem to want to talk about is Neo Seoul.
I try to avoid it as much as possible, but Chaerin had convinced me to watch the news today, saying something about it being the police's last statement regarding the case.
How she knew that, I'm not sure.
Sera was right. A lot of the things that actually happened didn't appear in the police commissioner's statement, which came as a surprise to me despite Detective Doyoung assuring me that he has us in his best interest— I guess it was wrong of me to doubt him, but who can blame me?
The news had mentioned Kun's involvement in the case— how he was the one behind the spreading of the drug in our university, but there was no mention about my hostage situation or of Haechan getting shot, which I truly appreciate. It made going to school a bit more bearable, even if I had to be in the midst of gossiping students who couldn't seem to get over the fact that our professor has been behind it all along.
It is a crazy thing to think about. I don't blame them.
There was no mention of Mark in the news either; neither was there any about Mr. Seo. I know that the police force doesn't like being affiliated with Spider-Man, especially because it makes them look incapable of doing their jobs, so if anything, I'm sure they would have jumped head first into exposing Mark's identity if they had the chance. It makes me wonder just what strings Jaehyun and Doyoung had to pull in order to keep this under wraps.
"... last seen on the day of the drug bust, and people have been wondering, where is Spider-Man?"
The mention of Mark causes me to snap my attention back to the screen, only for the commercials to start playing.
Chaerin sighs, reaching for the remote to turn the volume down. "You know, I can't believe the guy I've been raving about has been Lee Mark all along. Damn, I gotta apologise to him for calling him a nerd... and more."
"And this is why you should be nice to everyone!" Sera pipes in, and Chaerin sticks out her tongue as a reply.
I glance at my phone, seeing that there are no new notifications— no surprise there. I had left Mark a few messages after I got his note two weeks ago, but all of them were left unread. Haechan tells me that Mark hasn't been home either, leaving not just me wondering where the hell he could be.
I know thinking about it would only dampen my mood even more, but who can blame me?
"I should get ready." I stand up, dusting off my pants. My shift at Lee's doesn't start in another hour and a half, but at least getting ready would keep my mind off things.
"I should get going too. Nana's waiting for me." Sera follows suit, leaving Chaerin sprawled on the couch alone.
"I'll see you later!" She calls out when Sera and I walk out the door.
We're greeted by Jaemin when we reach the lobby, who instantly gives his girlfriend a kiss on the cheek. When the both of them bid me goodbye, I find myself staring at their retreating backs as I wonder just when it would be my turn again.
🕸️
"My arm isn't working!"
"Good thing God blessed you with another one, then!"
A small smile plays on my lips at the duo's bickering, making the otherwise damp atmosphere of Moon's a bit more lively.
Haechan had waltzed in a few hours after Chaerin, saying something along the lines of needing some caffeine in his system.
It was already nightfall, but I didn't question him.
He no longer has his sling cast on him, but it seems that Haechan has no plans to stop using his injury to his advantage— or at least, trying to. All his constant pleading towards Chaerin to feed him his donut hasn't worked at all.
I guess my roommate is just immune to his antics.
"Are you guys down for supper tonight? My treat," Haechan proposes when my last customer leaves for the day, leaving only the three of us in the store.
"If it's free, it's me." Chaerin shrugs. "You're down, right Yena?" She turns to me, as though sensing my hesitance.
"I don't know, guys..." I trail off, hanging my dishrag at the edge of the sink to let it to dry before facing them. "I'm kinda tired."
"But you need proper food in your system!"
Oh, Chaerin. Always so insistent.
"I'm not really even that hungry," I weakly argue.
"Well, you should still come anyway. God knows I would lose my mind if I'm left with this dumbass for more than five minutes."
Haechan nudges my roommate, clearly not appreciating her statement. "I'm right here."
"It's the weekend, babe!" Chaerin ignores the boy as she tries to continue to persuade me. "You can sleep in as long as you want tomorrow. Just join us? Please?"
I sigh, knowing that it had always been a losing fight for me from the very beginning. It's not like I don't like spending my time with Chaerin and Haechan— it's just that I'm not really in my best mood.
What better way to drown in my self pity than to bury myself in my covers as I stare at the ceiling, hopelessly waiting for the one boy I long for to come back to me, right?
"Hey, let's not force her," Haechan says, and for a split second I feel bad for being such a wet blanket. "You'll at least let me send you home, right? I did come all the way here, with my injured arm-"
"Ugh," I groan. "You guys always know how to make me feel guilty. Fine. I'll join you, alright?"
Haechan's face quickly changes into one of mischief, letting me know that his concern from earlier was nothing but a mere tactic to manipulate me.
It's freaky how similar him and Chaerin are.
The three of us shuffle towards Haechan's car after I lock the door to Moon's, Haechan whistling a tune as he twirls his car keys on his index finger.
I automatically enter the backseat, Chaerin getting in the front while she nags at him for driving out and about when he's still recovering.
"I can't stand not seeing your pretty face, Cherry," Haechan had merely replied.
I look out of the window as Haechan starts to drive, letting the world pass me by; my mind drift away.
The way everyone and everything has seemingly moved on despite the Neo Seoul bomb that had dropped two weeks ago is very telling of how life goes on, even if you don't.
Even if I don't.
Neo Seoul is gone; the safety of Seoul is restored, but with Mark not here, what good does that do me?
I close my eyes, deciding that being selfish and bitter would only get me nowhere. It's hard, acting like his disappearance doesn't affect me at all when in actual fact, it's eating me up whole.
"Man, what the hell," Haechan mumbles from the driver's seat. "Why is there a jam on a weekday night?"
I don't bother to open my eyes, the fact that we're in an unmoving car already causing annoyance to rise within me— what more with the fact that I never even wanted to go for supper in the first place.
"Yena?" Chaerin calls out my name.
"Hm?"
"Yena, I think that's for you."
I open my eyes begrudgingly, wondering just what the hell it is that Chaerin wanted me to see, but the sight only makes me freeze.
Haechan turns around in his seat. "The hell else are you waiting for?!" He exclaims. "Go!"
"I-" I stare at him wide-eyed, unable to form a coherent thought, let alone a sentence.
Something taps on the window next to me, and I turn to see just the person I've been longing for all this while.
Mark.
Haechan unlocks the door, and I stumble out of the car, Mark steadying me by my elbows.
"Yena," he breathes out, but I could only afford to stare at his masked face wordlessly, unsure of what I'm even supposed to say.
"Yo, it's Spider-Man!" Someone shouts from a distance, the jam-packed bridge soon erupting into a fit of loud chatter as people peek their heads out of their windows, some even stepping out of their car.
"Shit," Mark mutters as he takes a step towards me. "Hold tight."
"H-Huh?" I stammer. "Mark, I-"
I don't get to complete my sentence when I feel my body fly upwards, my arms instantly finding their way around Mark's neck as I cling on to him desperately, a small shriek escaping my lips.
No matter how many times he does this, I don't think I would ever get used to it.
"You alright?" He asks breathlessly as he continues to swing his webs, and I shake my head frantically with my face still buried in his chest. "Just a lil' more."
I eventually find my footing when we stop, but Mark is sure not to let me go until I properly balance myself. Looking down, that's when I realise where I am— on top of the very same bridge where his web art is displayed.
"Mark, what the hell!" I exclaim, my fingers wrapped around his forearms so tightly I'm sure they could cut off his blood flow. I feel strands of my hair hitting my face due to the night breeze, telling me that I'm not supposed to be this high up.
"Baby, relax, I got you," Mark assures me.
Ironically, the pet name that I had longed for all this while is what makes me loosen my grip on him, and Mark seems to notice.
"Yena, I-"
"Where were you?" I ask weakly, my voice coming out as shaky. Due to my conflicting emotions for the boy in front of me or to the height, I'm not so sure.
Mark looks away before he decides to tear off his mask, and I can't help but to let gasp softly.
"Mark..." I whisper. "You- you look like you haven't slept in days."
"Weeks, actually," he chuckles softly, his gaze downwards as he fumbles with the mask in his fingers. He looks back to me. "Two weeks, to be exact."
I bite my inner lip, already feeling the tears pooling at the back of my eyes at sight of the boy before me.
Of course, he's still the Mark I know, but I've never seen him so... worn out.
The bags under his eyes are prominent, complimentary to the stubble he is currently sporting. His usual olive skin looks so ashen, his lips chapped as though he's been gnawing on it every chance he gets.
This time, my body seems to have a mind of its own as I raise my hand to his cheek, feeling his warm skin under my palm.
Mark leans in to my touch, a soft— albeit tired— smile on his lips.
I don't stop the tears that are already streaming down my cheeks, and Mark raises both of his hands to wipe them away, cradling my face between his palms.
"I know we have a lot to talk about," he whispers. "But can I kiss you first? Please?"
I manage to chuckle in between my sobs, giving him a small nod as an answer. Mark doesn't hesitate before he leans in, and I find comfort in his warm lips that I have been craving for so long, no matter how chapped.
He drops his arms to my waist, wrapping me in a strong embrace with his lips never leaving mine, and I shiver slightly under his touch.
When we part, Mark rests his forehead on mine, his wide, brown eyes glimmering like stars in the moonlight.
"I've missed you," he breathes. "So fucking much."
"I missed you too, Mark," I instantly reply.
Mark smiles, but his lips soon tug into a frown as he shuts his eyes momentarily, shaking his head. "I'm so sorry." He swallows thickly, his voice breaking slightly as he looks down, avoiding my gaze completely.
"Hey," I whisper, rubbing my thumb on his cheek to make him look at me again. He does, his eyes glassy. "Tell me what's going on."
"I..." Mark trails off, and I drop my hands to envelop his in mine. "They put me on curfew. I couldn't do anything," he explains. "There was just so much going back and forth to the police station, but Doyoung hyung told me it had to be done. I couldn't risk going out until all the media attention died down."
Mark tightens his grip on my hands. "It killed me, not getting to be with you. I know you're mad, confused, upset— there really just isn't any excuse for me to do what I did." He takes in a deep breath. "I'm so fucking sorry."
"Mark, you didn't have a choice," I tell him, my voice hard. "You're right. I was mad. I was confused, I was upset. But a part of me knew you would never hurt me on purpose, so I've been clinging on to that small hope that you'd come back to me," I say softly. "If anything, I should be the one apologising. I doubted you."
"That's not your fault." Mark shakes his head. "I put you through hell. I..." he pauses, staring at our intertwined fingers before he lets go, and I feel panic rise in me. "I don't deserve you."
"You don't get to decide that," I scoff, almost in disbelief. "You don't get to decide what I feel for you, Mark."
"I can't afford to see you hurt again, Yena. I put you through enough," he argues.
"And then what?" I challenge him, my voice rising. "You think leaving me would just make things better? That I would immediately be safer if I stay away from you?"
Mark stares at me helplessly.
"You don't make me wait for you for weeks, giving me hope with that note you left me, just to suddenly appear and tell me you're breaking up with me, Mark Lee," I say, my throat thick with tears. "I knew what I was signing up for when I got together with you. You don't get to decide what's best for me."
He closes his eyes, and I finally see his tears escape as they fall in a never-ending stream down his cheeks. Mark sniffles, running a hand down his face as he turns around slightly to face the city below us. "I don't think I could ever let you go," he mumbles. "Doesn't that make me selfish?"
"No, being selfish is thinking that you can make the call for me just because you believe it's the right thing to do." I step towards him. "Are you... are you doing this because you're guilty? That maybe, letting me go would make you feel better about everything that's happened?"
"God, no." Mark turns to me, his eyes wide in alarm. "Yena, I just want you to be safe."
"Then why won't you fight for me, Mark?" I ask, my voice a soft, quivering whisper. "Why won't you fight for us?"
Mark bites his inner lip, his breathing getting increasingly heavier the more his tears fall. His knees eventually buckle, and he doesn't bother to hide himself anymore as he turns into a crying mess on the floor.
I, too, can barely see him as my vision is blurred with my own tears, but I manage to find my place next to him as I find his hands in mine once more.
"Mark," I call for him, but he doesn't look up as he tries to steady his breathing. "Let me be there for you," I say, though it sounds more like plead. "Please."
Mark eventually nods, the tight feeling in my chest loosening tremendously in relief. He holds onto my hands tightly, as though it would help in stopping his shaking ones.
"I'm so sorry," he whimpers. "I didn't mean to make you feel that way. I'm just scared," he admits before looking up to me, his eyes red and glassy. Still, they look like they hold the entire universe in them that even in his raw and vulnerable state, I'm so blessed to be able to look at them. "I'm so fucking scared, Yena."
"I know," I say softly. "And so am I. But isn't that the point? To figure it out together?"
Mark nods wordlessly, his gaze dropping to my lips momentarily before he looks me in the eye again. "I love you," he whispers. "So fucking much, Hwang Yena."
"I know." In the midst of my own sobs, I give him a smile. However strained, still held so much sincerity. "I love you more, Mark Lee."
—
One chapter to go... 🥹