November 27th, 2020
Heeseung slowly walked up to me and kneeled down. He grabbed the vodka and closed it, then he stood back up and stored it in the fridge. Then he came and sat by my side.
"Any occasion for this or just because?" He asked, looking me deep in the eyes. I didnt answer, I only stared back at him. He was glowing again. Oh man not again. My breath quickened.
"Cmon dont look at me like that." Heeseung flushed, looking away. I grabbed the collar of his shirt, gripping it tightly. He looked back at me in shock.
I pulled myself closer to him and buried my face in his neck. Yes I wanted to kiss him but I shouldn't. He'd hate me. I didn't need him to hate me any more than he already did.
Heeseung chuckled. I could feel his throat vibrate with his chuckle. Everything felt so unreal. I'm dreaming. I sat back up. I am dreaming. This isnt real. Then maybe...
I stared at Heeseung for a long minute. He looked confused. Rightfully so but this was all a dream. Real Heeseung was probably in his room asleep or something.
I tugged on his shirt again as he blinked at me with confusion written on his face. I leaned forward a little, seeing if he'd lean in too. I think he caught on to what I was doing because he giggled.
"You wont remember this if it happens right?" Heeseung asked. I nodded subconsciously. He laughed. Then he stood up and pulled me up with him. I whined, that's not what I was implying dimwit!
He carried me to the couch and laid me down. He lifted my head and stuffed a pillow beneath it. "You need sleep Jeongmi. When you're sober we can talk." Heeseung said, sitting next to me.
I looked at him with sad eyes. He smiled down at me and then turned my TV on. He went on youtube and began to play music. He leaned back and relaxed. Was he just going to sit in here with me?
Does he do this everything I get drunk? He just stays in here and waits until I fall asleep? Huh...interesting. It's also interesting how he is acting like nothing has happened. That's why I think I'm dreaming. I think.
I stayed awake for a long time oddly enough. Heeseung glanced at me every once in a while. I only stared at the ceiling, sitting through my drunken state. Then a particular song came on.
Heart Attack by Demi Lovato. As funny as it is I used that song to audition. I turned my head to the TV. I instantly began to sing along to the lyrics, trying hard as I didnt want to sound stupid infront of Heeseung.
I glanced at Heeseung and he was smiling. I gushed and continued singing. I've grown to really like his smile. I mean I've honestly always liked his smile.
The high note neared and I was preparing for it. It was obviously my favorite part of the song as it is for most people. Once the high note came I surprised myself by pulling it off while drunk.
"You should sing more often around others. You sound beautiful." Heeseung complimented. I flushed and stopped singing out if embarrassment. He said I sounded beautiful.
He's fooling me in purpose isnt he? "Why'd you stop?" He whined, nudging my shoulder. I nudged him back. Just to move on from the topic, I sat up, trying to get up and go to the closet for a blanket.
Heeseung stood up and laid me back down. "You can hardly stand so just stay still. What do you need?" He asked, holding me down. I pointed to the closet and imitated putting a blanket over myself.
He let go of me and walked to the closet, grabbing a blanket. He stepped back over and covered me in the blanket then he sat back down next to me.
I closed my eyes and got comfortable, ready to fall asleep. Before I knew it I fell in a deep slumber.
Time skip
I woke up to someone shaking me. My head was automatically pounding. I felt sick and dizzy. "Jeongmi wake up." I heard someone whispering in my ear. I whined and sat up, fixing my hair and rubbing my eyes.
It was Heeseung. Had he stayed here the entire time I was asleep? I noticed that Jay and Sunoo were also in the room. Heeseung showed me something on his phone.
It was my birthday post from earlier. I happened to look at the time to see it was 10:35pm. Heeseung put his phone in his pocket and stared at me with crossed arms. "Jeongmi why didnt you tell us it was your birthday?" Sunoo whined.
I fumbled for my phone and finally found it therefore I opened it and began to type my explanation. "I've never had my birthday celebrated so I didnt feel it was important to tell anyone." Then I showed it to them.
Collectively, they looked up at me. I turned my phone off, leaning against the couch. Sunoo and Jay looked concerned while Heeseung looked shocked.
"You've never celebrated your birthday?" Sunoo asked with a frown. I shook my head. I still felt sick and hot, so I placed my hand on my forehead. I closed my eyes as I wished for the headache to go away.
"We'll have to celebrate it tomorrow then. It's too late now." Jay admitted solemnly. I hummed in response and laid back down, wanting to go back to my dreamland.
I could take an eternal slumber like Aurora right now. "Let's go so she can sleep." Sunoo spoke softly, walking away and quietly opening the door to leave. Jay followed.
Heeseung stood still. I suppose he waved for them to go because I heard the door shut. He let out a small sigh and sat next to me like he was before. My eyelids were heavy and I swiftly started slipping to dreamland.
"I dont think I can-" I didnt hear the rest as I had fallen asleep.
Novermber 28th, 2020
I woke up around 9am. The room was quiet and dark. I slowly sat up and looked around. I nearly jumped seeing a sleeping Heeseung next to me. He looked peaceful. I carefully got up, watching his eyes to make sure I didnt wake up.
Once I had gotten up successfully, I slowly draped the blanket over him. He moved a little bit. I froze to make sure he stayed asleep. He did. I let out a small breath and grabbed my phone, walking to the kitchen.
I grabbed water and began to chug the rest of the one from yesterday. Then I sat and stared at the vodka for a long moment. I shook the thought away. I needed to get some food though. My fridge and cabinets were quiet empty.
I might have to leave Heeseung here to go to the store. I walked over to my dresser and changed my pants quickly. Please Heeseung's dont wake up. Then I changed my shirt.
I looked back and Heeseung was still sound asleep. I sighed of relief and grabbed purse. I shoved my phone in there (my wallet was already inside of it) then I grabbed a peice of paper off the top of the dresser.
I grabbed a pen that was next to it and wrote down 'I'm going to the store. I will be back soon.' I placed the paper on the coffee table. I slipped my shoes on and left my dorm as quietly as possible.
With that I made my way to the store in the crisp cold air of November. I felt really bad about not tell Jay, Sunoo and Heeseung about my birthday. They seemed disappointed at the fact they didnt know which is my fault since I never told them.
Anyway I made it to the store. I went inside, shivering from the cold. I grabbed a cart and began to walk around, looking for foods I wanted. I grabbed ingredients for tteok-bokki but the rest were snacks and not such filling foods.
Mostly healthy foods too. I'm an idol after all. I paid for it all and began to do the shitty journey back with all my heavy bags in hand. The cold air was slapping against my face at the smallest gusts of wind.
My cheeks and nose were growing red from the icy winds and air. I love winter/fall but goodness. I'm surprised it hasnt began to snow yet. Eventually, I made the trek home and I stumbled into my apartment.
Heeseung was awake and watching TV. The moment I fumbled into the room he shot up and helped me with the groceries. I think he liked the sight of no alchohol in any of the bags.
He helped me put everything away. Once we were done I went and sat on the couch, cuddling into the warm blanket. I was trembling from freezing temperatures. I should have worn a padded jacket.
"You should have waited for me to wake up. I would've helped." Heeseung sounded like he just woke up, voice low and husky. I didnt realize be he had snuck behind me.
His head was hovering above my own, eyes warm. I stared up at him and gave a small shrug. Then something in his eyes changed. I cant tell what kind of change but it was a change. A frown suddenly came upon his face.
"Uhm something came up. See ya Jeongmi." Heeseung said, spinning around and walking out. I watched after him with confusion. Did I just watch soft Heeseung turn to cold him?
My stomach turned. I felt sick. What about me made him change to such a cold creature? I shivered, trying to take the thoughts out my mind. I felt colder than before. I wrapped myself tightly with the blanket, trying to warm up.
I tried to ignore it and watch TV but it weighed on my conscious so much. I just want an explanation on why he hated me like he did. I mean he doesnt always hate me but...well he does most times.
I heard my phone buzz so I looked at it. It was Manager telling us all to go practice as a group as we only had two more days until debut and we needed to be prepared for all the shows and stuff.
I huffed and got up. I havent even eaten yet. Whatever I'll have to tough through it. I changed into some activewear. I grabbed my bag and shoved my phone inside, then I slipped on my shoes and went outside.
Apparently there was supposed to me cars waiting for us but when I got there, there wasnt any cars waiting. I texted Jay and asked if he and any others already left. He said yes and that the ones that didnt go in his car went in another.
They were all already gone. I really didnt take that long, right? I mean seriously what the hell? Theres no why they could've forgotten me! Well I guess they did. To make it better, it started to drizzle.
The drizzle became harsh rain pretty quick. The cold rain made me colder than I already was. My hair was getting drenched. I tried to flag down a taxi but nobody would stop.
Then my phone buzzed again, I hid under the awning of the dorm building and looked at what he said.
Jay
Did they forget you or something? We need to start and you still arent here.
Me
Well obviously they did or else I'd be there. To make it even fucking better it's raining! Did the staff purposely do this as a joke or something?
Jay
I dont think they have much time to joke around. I thought you had gotten in the other car...Did you try and get a taxi or bus?
Me
Nobody will stop. I'll just walk.
With that I shoved my phone in my bag and began to the long walk to the company building. How lucky could a girl be?
Time skip
It took longer than normal to get the building due to me getting lost a few times. I was soaking wet like a mop from the heavy rain. Water was dripping off of me and onto the floor which I was walking on.
I was trembling. I should've looked at the weather report. Eventually I found the studio everyone else was in. They already started practicing. Then I heard something from one of the members.
The words nearly made me drop to my feet.