T/W: Violence
Romero keeps quiet with Von this close. Seven pays him one last look before guiding me down the hall and further away from the other gang members. Kimori is still lingering around Von. Von who still hasn't taken his hands off of Romero.
"Right now, this is the best time to do it. Everyone is all scattered," Seven starts rambling before I can even realize what he's talking about. "The issue is: all eyes are already on you."
Even though he is speaking lowly I can feel his excitement. He's talking about getting revenge on the gang. "I can co it for you if you want. It's best if you don't do this on your own."
Seven's eyes are intent on me as he grows more somber. I stare down the hotel hallway behind him and fixate on an expensive painting to free myself. I'm still not fully comfortable with all of these men. Seven intertwines his fingers with mine. If anyone else would want revenge on Diana, it makes sense it would be him. I just need to know why Von told him, and who else Von has told.
"Can I trust everyone?" I ask him. "You saw how he was just yelling at me. He could've been the one pouring the gasoline for all I know."
Seven furrows his eyebrows as he looks back at the two older members. "Romero used to try and bully me too. He thinks we're intimidated by his size. I think he's jealous of Von's love," he chimes in. "Von doesn't love us all equally, you know."
I'm not giving Romero any excuses. "He doesn't love us all the same," I say honestly.
Because Von is so gentle with Kimori. He's so attentive with Seven himself. And he's so patient with me. He changes his approach with each and every one of us.
Von sends for the elevator and as Seven and I join the rest of the group he pulls me back beside him. I expect to go a couple of floors down but we descend rapidly. Before I know it we are below the first floor. The red numbers stop appearing on the wall and the elevator comes to a staggering hault.
I check to see any signs of shock on Kimori's curious face, but it's just me. The men file out and I'm last to leave right behind him. I'm the last to realize who's down here waiting for us all.
The room silences like we're the guests of honor. There are so many people here, more than both of the dinners we've had combined. The basement has completely different lights from the other rooms I've seen. These seem to sway gently yet endlessly. They dim to different shades of pale yellow and flicker onto new faces.
"This is perfect timing!" Diana says loud enough for the people in the back of the back to hear.
Most of the people in the room tower above me. But– Diana, in her heels when the syndicate parts to reveal me, she makes me feel like a fucking ant.
"I already know they were soft on you," she walks straight towards me. "So I'm going to be hard on all of you."
Without needing a word, one of the bullets walks up beside her. He placed himself directly in front of me. I've met a few bullets and not all of them are big and burly. Hyun, for example, works directly with Romero and he's a skinny Asian dude with tattoos. There are female bullets as well, just a few, and always scattered around.
Yet, Diana matches me up with this 6'2 beefcake. I'm dead. I wonder if the syndicate will let him kill me. Is this her way of being hard on all of us, by killing me?
The man acts like he has something to prove or a personal vendetta. He charges at me and I'm flipped on my back in an instant. Before I can get up he's on top of me and his fists are flying. Suddenly cutting straight through my blocking and dodging, he grazes my lower lip.
There is shuffling amongst the syndicate members but I'm too busy fighting for my life to distinguish much. With a deep breath, I roll the bullet off of me. He grabs my shirt and tears the fabric when he uses his grip to adjust our positioning.
He's got to be at least ten years older than me. He's mature in the face and his movements are calculated. This is bad. My forearms are getting bruised up and one more hit could break something. I'm so tired of fighting. I use my flexibility to get on top of him again. You can hear a pin drop as our roles change.
I give up on hitting his face when he starts clawing up my neck. My fingers land over his eyes and I press down. I dig into the wet flesh until I've completely gouged his eyes out. He rolls off of me in an instant, retching on cries. I don't let go of what I have in my hand, blood drips when I stand up. It's either coming from me or my fist.
The gang member continues to wail out. Before Diana can call orders, Von pulls his gun and shoots the man directly in the forehead. He doesn't care to silence the sound and it goes off like a firework in the concrete room.
Just like fireworks, it fizzles out to pure silence.
I wanted to go to college. During my sophomore year, I discussed it briefly with my father. The holiday break allowed us to spend New Year's Eve together in the front yard. I'd heard of schools upstate and they sounded like a whole new world. Being homeschooled all my life, I gravitated towards those. I mentioned them once, I was already trapped in my home not to mention the same city. I needed to get out.
My father wouldn't allow it. Instantly, the idea was shut down and a new one was planted in my head. He said all the policemen's kids get into this open-campus college twelve miles away. Naturally, as his daughter, I would get a full-ride scholarship to attend with the bare minimum academic effort. That was the year I think I stopped trying.
It's so quiet now, and I can't do much. I hold my hand out to Diana. Slowly and skeptically, she opens her palm to me. I place both of the man's eyeballs there before she has a chance to retract it and let them bounce to the ground.
"I would like my own master suite in exchange," I say. "I didn't kill him. I haven't broken any rules and I won. I want one of the top floors."
Diana breaks the silence that follows, not with her words but with her hands. She claps slowly with the spots of blood still there. There's a lightly scattered applause throughout the room as well, but I think mostly everyone is disturbed. I even scared myself. Ultimately, my life comes first, and I want to live.
•••
As Syndicate members, We don't have to stay for the entire meeting. L joins us on the way back to the elevator and even in my dazed state, I'm dreading how claustrophobic the crowded space is going to be.
"You did great, Mia!" Kimori praises my earlier killing like it's nothing. He walks in stride with Seven as the only two men who seem to be in a good mood.
I feel sick before we even get on the elevator. It's a mixture of nausea and disgust. We file inside and Von uses his key first.
"He's lucky he didn't hurt you too badly," he says and a few of the men chuckle at the irony.
"You wouldn't have done anything differently if he did," I mumble.
Von presses a button to stop the elevator. We're on the ninth floor. "What the fuck did you just say?"
The elevator is large enough for us not to be directly beside each other. Yet, I feel floored by his words before he can close the distance.
"I'm not going to ask you again," and he never does. He grabs my jaw and makes me look directly at him. His eyes reveal boiling anger directed at me. "I let you get too comfortable."
"I'm sorry," I say because we're in a metal box yet he still managed to back me into a corner. My face is squished between his rough hand and everyone is staring at me.
"You're so spoiled," Von lets go and what lingers is his coarseness.
Romero quickly confronts me next. He presses his hand so hard on the metal behind me, I hear the weight of his entire 6'4 frame. "I thought you did great earlier. You really earned your keep," he says.
His earlier anger is replaced by something somehow darker.
His voice is deep when he leans towards my ear. He flicks his thumb over the torn fabric on my chest.
"Maybe you earned a little treat too," he teases.
I shove Romero and he barely wavers. "Stop."
Tall and tanned, he backs off, puts his hands up, and chuckles. Laughing at and belittling me at the same time. His dimples add to how lightly he's taking things.
I punch four buttons on the elevator with my fist. It's suffocating being here. We aren't moving. I don't even know what Von pressed earlier and I'm getting more frustrated looking for it.
L places his hand over mine to stop the incessant tapping. He speaks to me for the first time in too long. "Your room isn't ready yet. You have to stay with at least one of us."
I flinch away from his touch. The idea of staying with any of these men is jarring, especially with Von angry at me right now. The men also share everything. Realistically, I'll have to stay with at least two of them depending on which person I choose.
"You're injured still anyway. We need to treat you," L says with his dark brown eyes scanning over my bruised frame.
Von makes a sound with his tongue, "It's safer for you with us, but I know you just want to fight." The look he sends me, his dark hair barely out of his eyes, it's daunting.
"I want to be alone," I say calmly, anything more and he'll say I'm the one being aggressive. I'm so tired of fighting.
"What?" Von raises an eyebrow, daring me to challenge him again.
"It's okay if she wants to sleep somewhere else we can still protect her and we will." L says and only this is enough to get Von's heated gaze off of me. My heart stops racing.
"Floor 21," Von calls loudly to anyone in the vicinity.
L presses two buttons and we're moving again. Seven and Kimori chat in the corner but otherwise, the short trip is silent. Once the elevator doors open, I immediately exit. I'm looking at the embroidered carpet when I feel cold fingers on my wrist. They have black lettering on them as well.
"I said I want to be alone." I pull away to no avail as Von only grips me tighter. He's already pressing on where that bullet clawed at me earlier. Then with the same hand, Von killed him. "It hurts. Let go!"
It's self-defense when I go to strike him but Seven still comes in to stop me. As always it's them against me. Seven is holding one hand and Von is holding the other. I drop to my knees. It's pointless to try and fight them.
"Are you okay?" L asks ready to nurse any potential concussion. Meanwhile, I've already told them all exactly what I need.
Von lets go reluctantly, following after Seven. I look down at the wrist Von was holding to see a bruise.
Next, he holds his hand out to keep the elevator still. Von reaches in his pocket and hands L his room key. "Have Seven bring her stuff," I can feel his eyes on me as I sit on the floor. "I'll keep first watch."
There's so much blood under my nails. I notice it dried and coagulated as I struggle to get back up. I don't allow any of the men to help me, not even Von who won't get back on the elevator.
Once the doors finally close with the other men on the other side, I take a deep breath. I should feel relaxed right now. I walk on shaky legs and Von doesn't lead the way despite knowing it far better than me. I dig at the grime stuck under my fingernails suddenly feeling overwhelmingly disgusted by it.
I never could quite get my breathing back to normal after that deep breath I took. Now I'm concentrating on it too, making it impossible to walk. My fingers are still filthy with dried blood practically stuck to my nail beds. I can't wait to get my hands clean. I can't breathe; they're basically stained.
"Mia," Von calls.
I take one step forward but I'm more concentrated on the tightness in my throat. I feel hot. The more energy I put into my breathing, the hotter I feel.
Von reaches to take my hands from me.
"Don't," I pull away, worried he'll hurt it again. I can't breathe.
I know his eyes are on me but I can only concentrate on myself, then he embraces me. He holds me before I can catch my breath. Completely covered by his buff frame and anticipating his next move, I can only stay still. He keeps his chin on my shoulder and doesn't speak. He just squeezes me to his chest, his heartbeat leading mine into a slower rhythm. My breathing steadies even as I stare at my hands in front of me.
Von's hands are cold. I focus on his touch. When I am so scared, he somehow soothes my burning skin. I close my eyes and feel my entire body relax. I'm only startled by the ding of the elevator as someone else gets on our floor. He doesn't let me turn to look at who it is. My movements are too frantic not to be self-destructive. Von nods his head and Seven hums before walking past us.
I'm not hyperventilating anymore. Von takes the chance to check my face, then finally lets go. I feel so exposed. He doesn't dwell on the moment. His blue eyes show no signs of disturbance. Yet, my face is so warm.
Seven joins us far too chipper. "I ran you a bath. Are you okay?"
"Yes," I say, unable to hide the shake in my voice. "I just want to be alone."
I know his response is on his face. Sensitive and smooth, I choose not to look at him. I walk in the direction I saw him coming from to find my new room.
The two men are speaking quietly when I realize I need a key to get in. As fate would have it, Von has it.