The quidditch field was eloped in noise. A chilly Saturday morning it was, fog settled unmoving from above, the passerines remained silent, the wind refused to howl, and the creatures and critters had yet to awaken. Despite the early morning, sleepy state of the British outdoors, the field was more alive than ever.
"Another twenty!" The firm voice of Marcus Flint roared. "Are we going to be making it Fifty?" The question was not rhetorical. It was a threat. "My Nan could do better than you lot!"
Marcus Flint barked order after order at the Slytherin Quidditch team. By four am, the low grunts and heavy breaths of the team was all Flint could hear. He thirsted for more, to sharpen his team to the point of indestructibility. He shaped his men to be ruthless, and to hold such power he needed to train them relentlessly.
Theodores' nose came down a mere centimetre from the damp grass before his arms pushed him back up. The process repeated in the form of a push up until he reached twenty, his breathing was heavy, his heartbeat rapid, sweat trickled down his forehead, neck and chest as he prayed for water. He wouldn't dare ask for it.
His face lowered down as he relied on his upper body strength to push his face up and away from the dirt. He allowed himself to intake a breath of relief before continuing one final time. Boys all around were in the same state, their mouths had run dry as their faces burned scarlet.
Flint held no mercy. "Finished are you, ninnies?" He scoffed at the group of them. "Another twenty." Theodore didn't allow for the groan if agitation to release from his chapped lips, he did not wish to face the punishment.
He continued to push himself, his breathing turned faint, he did not stop. Beside him, seventh year, Graham Montague was slowing down, he was mates with Marcus, the two had been hanging about since first year, that did not mean he would be supplied with any leniency.
Flint saw compassion as a means to an end. Useless, if you will. No one achieved anything great with 'clemency', so he forced them to push themselves, to push the limits. Theodore didn't hate Flint. He didn't like him much either, he hated everyone, but Marcus was mutual in his regard, Theo respected his work ethic.
The group continued to train as Marcus screamed his words of encouragement. "We will destroy Ravenclaw this upcoming match!" So endearing. "They shall writhe under the souls of our shoes as we crush them!" He seethed, ambitious as ever.
They were all exhausted in perspiration, their hair damp from hidrosis. Panting at the breath Theodore collected the heavy bag of flour Marcus had laid out for each of them, he threw the weight over his shoulders before he began his run. Each boy collected their own bag of flour before they jogged.
Draco beside Theodore was mumbling under his breath. "Mother fucker." He whined to himself. Theodore chuckled from aside him. Malfoy was redder than each and every one of them, his pale complexion enunciated his blooming, flushed cheeks.
Blaise a step ahead of them, the least red. The boy ran with his head down, counting quietly a tactic formed in order to distract himself. Theodore upped his pace to meet with his mate. Huffing he croaked out the words. "Counting again are we?"
"Shut up, you know it helps." The boy groaned. "You suck man." He sighed as he wore a lazy grin.
Theodore grinned right back before diverting his attention towards the physical torture he was forced to endure. Laps were run and breathing was limited, every intake of air was calculated. They knew they would train until they dropped.
Theodore, despite aware that the physical aspect to their practice was vital in order to win and although he enjoyed the release, he just wanted some water by that point.
By a quarter to six am, Theo and the team were on their brooms going through tactics and strategies. His lungs strained as he pushed on. "Ravenclaws are ruthless strategists, they are good. Be better." Flint roared amongst the soaring brooms.
Theodore had been a chaser since third year. He found the most thrill in the centre of the storm, the action. No moment was boring, every second depended on the game. Of course no matter how fun, and action pact his position may be, it was also the most tiring.
The ball came to him, and off he went. Chest lowered he pushed through the air at reckless speeds, he clutched the quaffle with one hand, as he gripped with broom with the right. Dodging past the opposition was easy for him, along with scoring, he liked to believe those were the qualities he was chosen for, but it was probably because of his ambition, his shared thirst for victory. That was the one trait each and every boy on the field shared.
No girl had been on the Slytherin quidditch team for over thirty years and by the looks of it, Theodore predicted it would remain that way. He once had urged Pansy to join, fifth year, she had a knack for beating people up, he figured her arm would be much more precise and vicious than the current buffoons elected beaters, Crabbe and Goyle. She wasn't interested.
If anything Pansy would be the most feared on the team, she was most certainly one of the strongest people he knew. Not only physically but mentally too, an openly gay girl in the time that they lived in, with the entitled snobs that they lived with. She had to have the thick skin, and hers was shielded with the richest and purest rocks known to man and woman, if Pansy were there she's insist he add that, despite the knowledge that his monologue was internal, he thought it regardless.
"Daydreaming Nott?" Flint roared from bellow, arms lifted at his sides in condescending questioning. "Stop thinking about your next shag, and get on with it!" Rolling his eyes, Theo returned his focus to the game, careful not to allow his thoughts to slip once again.
Quidditch was a phenomenal outlet for the Nott boy. Anger had been his drive for year, his core emotion, it's what inspired him to be the way he was and despite how well he had managed to mask the bubbling fury that tented to temper rather easily, he couldn't go around causing chaos as he wished. Quidditch solved that for him, kept him calm, for a good minute at least. When he was on the field he liked to believe he had a better chance to unleash that un-quelled rage.
His Slytherin team mates did not oppose to his careless outbursts of anger, for the field was the perfect outlet for all of them. Amongst Theodore that morning, he was surrounded by temperamental and easily triggered wizards. Each had their own dark story to tell. That was an unspoken truth they each shared and the Slytherin team was ruthless for it.
The exercise increased as their breathing worsened. Their complexions glistened from the beady sweat that had been forced from them, gravity seemed to be working against them, tugging harshly as their body's pleaded to give in. The floor looked so cozy. Flint himself grew tired, and only then were they given the relief of escape.
• • •
After their quick showers, changed into their casual sporting attire, the boys rushed back to the castle, each rushing for a goblet of water, any source of refreshment. As the group of young athletes jogged through the entry of the castle, Theodore came to a sudden stop at the sight of Aurora Flores with her head down as she scurried past the bunch.
The two hadn't conversed in weeks, the library meetings they continued to have became dull and silent, back to the way it was before. She never made an effort to speak to him unless it was vital or if she happened to be in a glorified mood.
Suddenly he no longer noticed how desperate his throat was for water. The warning his mind released became a faint tap in the back of his head in appose to the consistent banging before hand. Refreshment was no longer his priority.
Instead he quickly ruffled and puffed his hair, using the reflection of the nearest window to guide him. Licking the pads of his thumb he ran his finger over his eyebrows in an attempt to fix them.
He quickly bolted back to her direction, but she had long passed with her attention elsewhere.
Theo's eyes narrowed in accusation as she waddled along, her priorities clearly not on her surroundings but on an object of which rested between the pads of her fingers. Peaking over her shoulder he caught sight of a rusty coin, confused by the interest in which she had found in a coin, Theodore snuck behind her.
Water could wait.
Disappointed seeped through him as he continued to follow behind her, she refused to notice him. The coin must've been the most interesting thing in the world if even her other senses were caught vulnerable for it. Curiosity too twisted into him, as he followed. It was clearly no normal coin.
He trailed her all the way to the seventh floor. He kept up through the twists and turns of the castle, sure to keep up as she rushed along. Not once did she pay him any mind, she genuinely didn't notice him. Aghast, Theodore was adamant to know why.
About twenty steps ahead of him she turned a sharp turn. His eyebrows furrowed, the direction she went lead to a dead end. He jogged the last few steps before stealing a glimpse of the other side of the wall. Questions beat his forehead as he stared at an empty dead end, she was no where in sight.
He lingered the empty hallway in hopes she would appear, but it never happened. Disheartened, he shrugged and dragged himself back down towards the dungeon where he finally had a chance to drink his water. But he found himself not too keen to drink no longer, for the refreshment found itself not so relieving anymore.
• • •
Rory slid into the room of requirement, wearing a deep frown as she noticed the entire DA team, sat listening to Harry's instructions. The coin of which ordered them to attend a meeting confused Aurora greatly. Not only wasn't it the scheduled time but it happened to be six thirty am.
Students across the room each displayed evidence of tiredness. Eyes dropped and expressions remained uncaring as their bodies prayed for the release of sleep. Everyone seemed eager to drop down and slumber, all except Harry himself. His eyes were wide and alert along with his festive grin that implied it was acceptable to be awake and casting advance spells at such a time. His enthusiasm spread on to Hermione, who too looked festive. Tired but festive.
"What are we doing?" Padma groaned from her seat, her head rested onto her enclosed fist to support the weight of her head. Mumbled voices agreed with her from across the premises, Aurora too nodded along. Despite the fact that she often helped teach during the lessons, she too was left clueless and unaware.
"Harry's going to teach us how to cast a Patronus." Hermione practically squealed. Suddenly the room was much more lively and awake. Excitement burst through the atmosphere, as people began chatting animatedly about their Patronus.
Rory too found herself lively when imagining the possibilities of her own creature. For instance, she thought deeply on what animal it may be. When fourteen she dedicated an entire week to a study on the Patronus, she learnt of the patterns and how the animal cast displayed personality traits of the witch or wizard of who produced the spell.
Harry had a stag Patronus, despite the knowledge of personality inhabitants of most Patronus', Harry inherited his own from his father, which she read often happens when someone looses a loved one. She was always intrigued by the spell casted creatures, and was enthralled at the chance to cast her own.
"I want a dolphin." Rory heard the chipper voice of her friend Angelina behind her, "I love them." She sighed dreamily.
"I reckon chances of you getting one are fairly nice." She giggled along with her friend. "The animal is a product of your personality, and dolphins are supposed to be fairly extroverted and playful." Angelina squealed along with her friend, clutching Rory's shirt as they did so.
"Then you'll totally get like a rabbit." She grinned. "Innocent and fluffy." She grinned booping Rory's cold and flushed nose. The rabbit patronus had the reputation of being a product of an innocent and courageous person with an inquisitive side. Aurora wished that for herself.
As the excitement became maintained and calmer, the group of enthusiastic children spread out across the room, eagerly listening for instructions.
"I want you-" Harry projected from across the room. "To imagine your happiest memory." Confusion echoed through the room. "It could be anything, cooking with the family, drawing, singing, bringing home your first pet, the possibilities are endless." Eyes closed as minds took to thinking. "Whatever enthrals and inspires happiness within you." He spoke whilst minds remained occupied.
Auroras head traveled through her collection of cheery memories. She thought of any possible happy moments, they varied from travelling with family to reading her favourite book. The possibilities felt endless.
The room glowed a florescent shade of blue as Harry raised his wants and chanted the words. A beautiful stag stood prideful in all its glory. The room was entirely captivated. Everyone fell victim to the creatures beauty, it was only when Harry lowered his wand did anyone look away.
An hour flew by, and only four people had managed a patronus. Many had formed a hazy blur, Aurora one of them. No animal could be determined from the fog of blue that emitted from the end of her hand. She huffed begrudgingly.
A gasp of joy sounded from beside her. Angelina Johnson sprinted on the spot as a dolphin swam in circles around her. "Look." She chirped at Rory. The disappointed girl grinned from beside her, in a congratulating manner. The closed her eyes again and willed for a memory to come to her.
Children's feet pattered along the floorboards of their childhood home. Aurora and Malachai giggled amongst each other as they burrowed themselves behind the layers of coats in the wardrobe. Mal gripped his little sisters face in an attempt to maintain her young cackles.
"Shhh." He urged, grinning widely.
"It's time for bed." The voice of their eldest sibling Sebastian roared from the other room. "Where are you, you worms!" The eldest stomped.
Their giggles increased.
"I know where you are." His voice lowered as he approached the tall dark wardrobe of which laughter could be heard from. A smirk formed on the little boys face as he neared his unsuspecting siblings.
"Gotcha!" He boasted as he flung the doors wide. He was met with the defeated faces of Rory and Mal. "Ah ha." He smiled pridefully. Chin raised, his smile turned evil. "Mum, Dad!" He called. "I found them."
The footsteps echoed from the hallway. Aurora and Malachai paled as the patterned noise grew nearer. "Have you now?" A man chuckled.
"You're gonna be in trouble." The nine year old Sebastian giggles to himself.
"So much trouble." A soft voice followed. Their mother and fathers figures came from behind the young boy, the three stood, looking down at the two children who sat caught behind the rows of coats. Their mum grinned wickedly. "That's three sets of tickles then huh?" She turned to her husband who wore the same evil smile.
"Three?" The eldest, grew panicked.
"Three!" Their father pounced, grabbing his grasp.
"Ahh." The boy shouted. "Protect Rora!" He ordered his brother, they each knew how psychotic the little girl grew when infested with uncontrollable laughter.
Malachai raised his arms, shielding his little sister from their mums, evil games. She slowly advanced towards them, wiggling her fingers before her. The youngest child peeked over her brothers shoulder squealing when her mother neared. Then, she attacked.
Releasing a rugged war cry, Andrea lifted both of her youngest children, and carried them up the stairs. There they met, their father who still held tightly onto a struggling Bastion. In sync, the parents threw the children onto the shared bed before they showered them in tickles.
"No!" They all screamed. Legs kicked and laughter was screamed. They all writhed and wiggled under the touch attempting to escape.
Malachai, to escape, rolled off the side of the bed and tried to run off, only to be captured by his mothers torturous embrace. "Nice try little monkey." She pecked all over his pinkish face.
"You going to go to bed now?" Andrea asked, her arms crossed.
"I was already going to bed." Bas whined.
"What about these two munchkins?" She smirked down at her youngest two. Both melted into their pillows at the stern sight.
"Yes mummy." Rory giggled.
Their doting mother, smiled fondly as she tucked her beautiful children under the covers. She brushed the hair of each of her kids back, before softly kissing their foreheads. By the time each of them had just about dulled to sleep she murmured the phrase she did every night when she tucked the lights of her life to sleep.
"Go to bed my angels one, two and three, and when you wake, then you shall see, no one loves you more than me." She looked down at each of her babies before she swayed back to her own room. Only then did Aurora finally succumb to slumber.
"Expecto Patronum." Mumbled the bittersweet voice of Aurora Flores, her insides twisted at the memory. A surge of nostalgia, intertwined with giddiness bursted from within her. And as emotions swarmed, an animal expelled from the tip of her wand.
Her excitement was too overwhelming she could hardly acknowledge what the creature actually was. Her eyes followed the beauty as it took calculated strides through the room. Her heart throbbed in adornment, as her animal pounced through the air, walking in a heel to toe movement, the steps were stealthy and premeditated. Intelligence and slyness, this was her creature and she was proud.
"A fox?" Rang the question from behind her. Harry and her friends stood with confused expressions.
"Are you sure?" Fred questioned.
"Huh." The silence was somewhat awkward, she couldn't help but feel the judgement emerge from her group. Clearly a fox was surprising, considering her foe persona. It was then Aurora realised that if anyone were to understand her Patronus, it would be Theodore Nott.
Oh. The voice in her head sounded small and somewhat defeated. No one but him was actually aware of what her patronus meant. So she merely shrugged. "A fox." She smiled.
"That can't be right." Harry shook his head, his smile uncomfortable and fading at the second. Then an idea hit him. "Was your mum a fox?" He asked. "Because you know how you can inherit the animal of those who you've lost?"
Sounds of agreement and understanding became of her group. "Ahh."
"Oh yeah." They seemed somewhat... relieved?
"Erm no." The girl quickly grew shy and somewhat uncomfortable herself. "She was an owl." The girl shrugged. Eyes narrowed as small smiles grew, heads tilted and silence rang.
The fox was a Patronus of the sneaky. The intelligent, the witty and despite their cunning nature they tent to be fairly charismatic and easy to love. Aurora deemed herself suitable of the fox, apparently her friends who viewed the fox's sour traits, did not. They did not think her a fox.
Thankfully her friends attention was stolen when Ginny successfully produced a horse Patronus. The beautiful beast trotted around the room and danced along with the other Patronus'. Her friends each congratulated her, clapping and cheering and the horse pranced.
Aurora found herself frowning at the sight of her fox. "Huh. I didn't expect that from you." Angelina shared. "Doesn't suit, you know?" The girl shrugged before focusing back to her dolphin as it swam. Her lips pursed as she lowered her wand and willed for her creature to disperse. As the blue haze dwindled, so did the happiness conjured before hand.
With pursed lips she nodded her head. She went unnoticed as she slipped from the busy room. She was sure to duck her head as she scurried from all the laughter and cheer. She found herself no longer in the mood for such a jovial attitude.
As her steps increased in speed, she was suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to spurt a river of tears. She only allowed for no more than two to fall. Her mind worked a mile a minute, continuously spouting twisted and negative theories.
No one will ever understand you.
The one person who put in the effort to know you, is a snake.
Your friends wouldn't like the real you. No one would.
Everyone would hate you if you picked yourself.
You are a fox, untrustworthy and vile.
She clutched her head as she continued to rush away from her best friends who never knew her, as her heart ached and her thoughts continued to spit harsh truths. Her entire focus was occupied solely on the reality of her situation-
'She could never be she'.
She couldn't prepare for the collision. When she rushed straight into the chest of Theodore Nott she couldn't prepare for the way her ass smacked the ground as she flung back wards. In situations like those, isn't he supposed to catch her? She thought.
Her hands and behind broke her fall. Through her damp eyelashes she peered up at Theodore. Her eyes glared up at him her pout effortlessly on display. He laughed from above. Clutching his abdomen he hunched over. His cackles bounced off the stone walls of the empty hall, it was an alarming echo. He didn't seem to mind.
As his boisterous chuckles came to an end, he offered a hand to pull her up. She continued to leer from where she sat. Slapping his outstretched limb, she pulled herself up. Crossing her arms she hmph'd before spinning on her heel and away from him.
It was then that he noticed the moisture of her doe eyes. "Hey wait." He called. She ignored. As she continued to walk her eyes rolled at the sign of footsteps chasing from behind her. Gripping her wrist he prevented her from distancing themselves any further. "Why are you crying." He mumbled, afraid that if he spoke any louder he may embarrass himself. Comforting was not his strong suit.
She rolled her eyes once again, before attempting to untangle herself from his grip, it merely tightened in retaliation. "Nuh uh." He chuckled lowly. "What's wrong?" He turned serious.
"And why does it bother you?" She retorted, near certain that the question would scare him off, she was shocked by his honesty.
"Chance to get into a fight, defend your honour." He joked. She wasn't amused. "Look." He sighed. "I deserve your hate, I deserve it tenfold. I guess I'm trying to make it up to you." His words came out muffled, he was lying. Theodore Nott deserved plenty of rage from a lot of people, he allowed very few to achieve it, people he liked. Which was basically anyone he didn't loath.
It went painfully silent. "You were right." She sighed defeated. "I'm fake." She swallowed down her tears.
"You're just realising this?" She glared at him. "Look, I'm not going to bullshit you." He deadpanned. "Your real personality tends shadow your... politeness, your layer of protection. I'm assuming it becomes difficult to differentiate where the mask ends and you begin.
She frowned in confusion. He progressed. "Okay." He tried again. "Anyone can be polite but there are people like you, people who cling to their niceties and manners, to the point it becomes unnecessary. My bet is it gets emotionally exhausting."
He paused. "When I said to be 'real' with me, I said it because I loath the feigned kindness, I believed for a long time that you were a fake merely for the attention. I was wrong. The next time you're real with me, let it be for the relief, for yourself." He frowned, since when was he nice? He internally sassed. "Anyone who doesn't appreciate that doesn't deserve you."
She couldn't choke out a word, a murmur, a whisper. Her mouth willed for her to remain silent. He was being wise and understanding. Offering her sanctuary, a safe haven, a person she didn't have to bend over backwards for, and when she did treat herself whilst with him, I'd be for her.
Theodore knew all too well how to be selfish, and in that moment for the both of them it felt as though he was clawing a piece of himself from his flesh and offering it to her like one would a spare quill.
He knew that if he ever asked her to list the things she loves most, her own name would never be an answer, no matter how hard she'd earned it. Asking her to be real was for his own gain, he wouldn't mind allowing it to be hers either. Theo could share the relief as long as she was willing to cherish a chunk of the love she constantly gave to others, for herself.
He grew uncomfortable quickly. The two temperamental souls could learn a thing or two from each other, but that didn't prevent Theodore from avoiding sentiment as though it were a virus. He didn't say anything else, and he didn't allow her to either. He left without another word.
As he stormed off, he deemed it best he didn't provide anymore free advice, especially when it became unnecessarily emotional. He didn't trust her. When Theodore loved be loved deeply, he cherished, worshiped, adored. It meant that the heartbreak was just as amplified. He didn't need another chance at loss, he hadn't given anyone the chance to break him again, and he certainly didn't plan to crush those walls any time soon.
His walls of which guarded his benevolent heart were indestructible, unbreakable, he would later grow to loath the way Aurora Flores would learn to climb them.
__________________________________
AN
I don't knoooowwww. This chapter was okayy? Got a little too sappy but I tried to fix that.
Oh well hope you enjoyed. Pls comment, you don't understand how much I adore the comments.
Also also I absolutely loved the suggestions from last chapter, and Hehehe you'll be glad to know I've already planned for some of them.
Idk if you noticed but I've changed the cover a few times idk how I feel, pls express your opinions, I'd be hopeless without em.
Oh well, have a nice day xx
- Sofia