"I'm going to the House of Wind tonight," Elain called out as she left the dining table. Azriel sent Rhysand a wink as he rose and followed the female. Rhysand just grumbled and leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. Aurora felt like doing the same. She had finished her plate and was now shoving it forward for whatever magical entity to take it away. She downed her second glass of wine and shoved her chair back.
"Hey," Nesta spoke, catching her arm. Aurora looked down at her.
"I'm up for some night time training if you are, I'll bring the wine," Nesta whispered the last of her words with a wink. Rhysand had obviously heard it, because he shoved his chair back and began cursing Nesta under his breath as he made his way to the wine cellar door.
"I'd love that. I think during the summer I'm going to do more self training at night," Aurora responded, leaning against Nesta's chair. Feyre finished her own wine and sent the two females a smile.
"Enjoy your night, you two. I'm off to go wake Nyx, please try not to piss Rhys off too much," she spoke, landing a soft kiss to Nesta's cheek, who rolled her eyes and patted her younger sister's hair.
"We will do our best, but he's always angry," Nesta responded as Feyre sent her an amused glare and walked off towards the stairs. Rhysand emerged with bottles of wine in his arms. He handed two bottles of white wine to Aurora, and two of red to Nesta. Aurora eyed the three bottles left that were tucked under his arm. He sent her a sly grin as he slid past the two.
"These are for me." Aurora fought her laugh as she watched him follow Feyre up the stairs with his bottles of wine. Nesta snorted and stood from her chair. Cassian, who Aurora had nearly forgotten was there, stood with her.
"I'm staying at our room here tonight, I don't want to hear Az and Elain. She's way too vocal," Cass cringed, kissing Nesta's head before heading to the stairs. Aurora thought back to when she had first been touched by Azriel. Promise me you'll be vocal. Maybe Elain was what he really wanted. The taste of wine seemed more enticing now.
"I'll go get changed and I'll meet you at the ring," Nesta said to Aurora before hurrying up the stairs after Cass. Left alone to her own self, Aurora tucked the bottles of wine in her arms and began marching out to the training ring. She was still dressed from her earlier combat with Azriel.
Aurora plopped down on the center of the training ring, setting one bottle beside her and opening the other. She was grateful that Rhys had given her a bottle with a lid rather than a cork. She tipped her head back and began drinking, leaning back on her arm and crossing her legs. The night was silent, peaceful. Aurora turned her gaze the darkening sky. This is the darkness she enjoyed, the stars and moon kissing the ground beneath them.
"Can I have some?" Aurora's head fell back further with a groan before lifting it to meet hazel eyes.
"Don't you have a date with Elain?" Aurora sneered, taking another drink. Azriel grinned as he sat next to her and snatched the opened bottle from her hands.
"Not a date. We're having a sleepover," he responded. Aurora watched his lips touch the bottle as he drank. When he handed the bottle back, she lifted her gaze back to his eyes.
"Then why are you out here?" Aurora snapped. Azriel's handed the bottle back to her, which she gladly drank. She'd need more bottles if he planned to sit here for a while.
"I forgot my dagger out here earlier. I saw you and decided to give you company," Azriel responded. His eyes trailed across her face as she glared at him.
"Nesta will be out here soon." Azriel shrugged at her words, flicking his eyes to the estate before returning to her face.
"She's getting changed in a room with Cassian, she's going to be a while." Aurora cringed, bringing her knees up. She tipped the bottle back again, and when it left her lips, she stared up at the stars again. She felt Azriel's presence, heard how his body moved closer to her. She felt the caress and whisper of shadows along her skin. The tip of his wing appeared in her vision, and Aurora turned her head down to see him nearly touching her shoulder.
"Why are you really here, Az?" Aurora asked. He shrugged again, taking the bottle from her hands but he didn't drink it this time, he placed it beside them. His fingers ran over hers and chills shot through her body.
"Tell me to stay, Aurora." Her brows inched toward each other, goosebumps rising on her skin as his hand ran up her arm.
"What?" She asked softly. Azriel was much closer to her now, his hand resting on her cheek. She felt the calloused skin run against her, and she leaned into it.
"Please, tell me to stay tonight," Azriel murmured. Now she felt his breath on her skin, and Aurora didn't realize her own body moving towards him. She smelled the wine, but something more. Something that didn't have the sharp sweetness of wine.
"How much have you had to drink?" She asked, breathing out heavily when one of his hands gripped her thigh.
"A bottle or two," he murmured. Aurora sat back, observing him. His eyes were glazed over and bloodshot, his tan skin paler than normal. Aurora brushed back the curled hairs that fell near his eyes.
"A bottle or two of what?" She asked softly. Azriel gave her a lopsided grin, his hand going to twist the hair that fell over her shoulder.
"Wine, whiskey, whatever would get me drunk quicker." Aurora's eyes widened.
"You're drunk? Why?" She asked as her hand fell from his hair and to his shoulder.
"Because I'm taking someone home tonight, and that someone isn't you. Elain doesn't know it, but I've needed to break into the whiskey just so I don't think about you when I'm fucking her. It doesn't work, I've had to finish her a different way because I remember that she isn't you, and I can't have sex with someone while imagining another, it's wrong," he whispered, his eyes falling to the skin his thumb caressed. Aurora stared at him, confusion and frustration filling her.
"Az, you shouldn't have to get drunk just to have sex with someone who likes you. You probably shouldn't be having sex with them."
Azriel's lopsided grin didn't fall, but his eyes did. Sadness clouded the hazel irises. "She wants me, though. I don't have that very often," he responded softly. Aurora now held his face, her thumb moving along the scruff on his jaw.
"I don't understand. You slept with Gwyn and Elain, even if you didn't want to, because you liked that they want you? That doesn't sound right," Aurora whispered. Azriel shrugged, the smile faltering.
"My brothers are in love, Aurora. My brothers have someone that would tear the entire world apart for them. At first, I thought it would be Elain for me, and then I met Gwyn. I really liked her, but it wasn't right after you came along. I was waiting for my turn to meet my mate and fall in love, because they did within a year of each other. I figured if the Cauldron blessed them with two of the Archeron Sisters, I'd get the third. Lucien was her mate, and I was forbid from touching her. Then I met Gwyn, and I thought I knew she was the one, I was just waiting for the bond to click. Then you came to the House, and you were in every thought I had. Morning and night, I thought of you.
"I thought that meant you were my mate, but I wasn't sure. You had a calling to me, too, even as distraught as you were, and I knew it was true. I believe you didn't know about the bond because you had been so focused on everything else. But, my mate has rejected me, so I'm getting drunk until I fall in love with Elain again."
Aurora shifted away from him, eyes falling to the ground around them. She didn't know what to think, or to say. Azriel had been waiting his whole life for someone to love, and she was his mate, but she didn't want a bond like that. She knew their bond made them reach for each other, but she wanted love. How would she know if it was true? She'd never experienced it before. Had Azriel? Had his feelings for Elain or Gwyn been love?
"I don't want a mating bond." That was all Aurora could say as her hands went through her hair and elbows rested on her knees.
"I know. I was hoping you'd at least have feelings for me that extend past the mating bond, but obviously not. I'm sorry for trying to kiss you tonight, I need to go find Elain," Azriel murmured, placing a hand on her shoulder before standing. She did. Aurora did have feelings for Azriel, but was it worth gaining an enemy in the estate? If Elain hated Aurora, so would Nesta. Feyre, too, maybe. Her happiness was not worth tearing apart this family. Azriel could find love with Elain, couldn't he? If not her, then Gwyn. He has options. If Aurora felt the need to be touched, she could go visit one of the many taverns... Couldn't she? The thought of anyone touching her besides Azriel was sickening, disturbing.
"I do. I just don't think I belong in this family that way, Azriel. I think that I would gain enemies here if I chose to love you, and I don't want anyone to feel ill towards you," Aurora whispered, looking up at him. Her ears picked up the sound of someone else coming towards them; Nesta. Azriel clenched his jaw, looking towards the estate.
"Being loved by you would be an honor, and if anyone decided they hated me for pursuing you, I'd gladly leave this city for you. Fuck, Aurora, if anyone treated you poorly for loving me, I'd send them to their death. It's your choice, I promise to stop trying to get you to pay attention to me, I'll stop using Elain to get to you. I wanted her for so long, I should be grateful to have her."
Aurora wasn't sure if Az was trying to convince himself of that, but she watched him go into the shed for his dagger and she watched as he forced a smile as he walked past her and towards Nesta, who was now getting closer to the ring.
"Have a good night, Az," Nesta smiled. Azriel dipped his head.
"You too, Nes."
Aurora watched him disappear into the shrubs, and then she, too, feigned a smile.
"Ready to see who can kick the hardest when they're two bottles in?" Nesta grinned. Aurora stood and wiped the dirt from her pants.
"Absolutely, I'm a bottle in. You should catch up," Aurora smiled, shaking the empty bottle. Nesta took that as a challenge and somehow used her nails to get the cork out. She'd have to teach that to Aurora when her nails grew back out. Nesta began chugging, so Aurora took the chance to open her next bottle and go wrap her hands.
Once Nesta was finished and prepped for combat, the two of them began. It lasted for hours, mostly with them falling on the ground with bowls of laughter. Cassian and Rhysand joined to watch in amusement while Mor and Feyre played with Nyx in his nursery before bed. Aurora continuously felt the ache of misery rise in her stomach, but then the ache from Nesta's punch would replace it. So she focused on her fun with her friend, accidentally doing the splits when she tried to kick Nesta's torso.