AYESHA's POV
5 days later...
It's in the morning and I'm getting ready for work whilst making my breakfast in the kitchen. I'm the only one up since Mike and Chrissy are sleeping in. (Yes they were in poundtown, fucking heard that shit the whole night) .The past 3 days have been really awkward with Nate around as i make sure to avoid being with him in the same room for too long.
I haven't been to Cassius's in days even though yesterday was my afternoon off and i wanted to spend time with him but he told me he had been busy finishing up his songs. I wasn't finna disturb his process or none and i did feel like i had been to his place for too long anyway.
a bitch was lowkey being cling afff
It's not like I hate Nate or anything like that but it's just weird being in the same room as him and worse to actually have a conversation with him. I mean I lost my virginity to this fool!
He saw and touched every inch of my body, heard every whimper, moan and cry from my mouth both from pleasure and heartbreak. I lost my virginity during senior year of high school and we'd always have sex after school at his parents house since they weren't around much. It was good dick, whatever imma admit that.
Starting to doubt if that nigga was even a virgin too cause the first time was TOO good huneyyy.
When we graduated before he got in the program I always used to lie to my parents that I was sleeping over at Chrissys but I'd spend the whole night getting railed at Nates. Its part of the reason why letting go of him was hard because the sex was just too addictive and we used it as the glue of the whole relationship.
He knew and worshiped my body. Knew how to touch me correctly, fuck me correctly. Now I have to speak to him like none of that ever happened to avoid awkwardness on both ends.
He is also part of the reason why no other man could please me (except for my bae Cassius and his monster dingaling of course). It frustrated me and made it harder to move on. Having sex with other people didn't feel the same or even right at the time. Until Cassius came into the picture is when i had actually started to get good and i mean AMAZING dick. We haven't officially label what we have but i don't want to rush him into asking me to be his girl.
I'm a lover girl so i expect a hotel proposal with a promise ring and roses writing "be my girl" on the bed soon
But besides the half ass apology from him and the "sorry I've been busy" text he sent last night, my messages have been left on delivered and no call has been answered which is definitely unlike him.
I miss my man who's also not my man ughh
I'm going to ask Geezy what's up with Cassius and him distancing himself today, maybe he might know but imma try to not make it obvious since i don't think he knows what is going on between us.
I am lost in thought when Nate comes in the kitchen.
"Morning," he asks walking my direction towards the counter I was leaning on. He moves closer to me and I look up at him in confusion since he's very tall but only a few inches below Cassius.
As I was about to ask him to back up he lifts his arm and gets a mug from the cupboard above me.
Was about to ask this nigga to back the fuck up before i act the fuck up.
He then goes to the coffee machine and I continue staring at him, not trying to make it obvious.
Nate is really tall and light skinned. He has brown eyes and corn rows in his curly hair. He plays sports so he is obviously has a body to die for. He is wearing some tiny running shorts that expose his perfect legs and and a white vest. I hate to admit but he does look really good right now. I can't stop stealing glances at him. I'm sure this is because I hadn't seen him in what seems like forever.
Me to my pussy right now: 🙅🏾♀️🔒❌❗️⚠️
"Are you going to stop staring at me and answer me or what?," he says smiling and leaning on the counter. I didn't realize I was staring.
"My bad, good morning?," I ask back finishing up my coffee which almost burns my tongue and getting out of the kitchen ready to go.
"I'm starting to think you can't stand being in the same room as me," he says taking a sip of his coffee which makes me stop at my tracks before and looking at him.
"Either that or you're just really nervous around me," he says putting down his cup in a taunting manner.
"In a world you can be literally anything...be fucking for real," I say letting out a sarcastic laugh as he laughs with me too.
After the laughter dials down we stare at each other for a short while and get snapped back to reality as Chris and Mike walk in. These guys haven't left each other's side, especially since Chrissy asked for a week off at the fashion institution. She looks very happy and I love that for her, she's even glowing. I guess it was worth it allowing the guys to stay with us for Chrissys sake or whatever.
"Hey yall," says Chrissy looking at both Nate and I suspiciously
"What's good," adds Mike and i wave at him as they both sit for breakfast.
"Ouu you look like those hot porn actresses with your little waitress uniform, you going to see Cassius today?," she asks.
this horny ass
"Who's Cassius?", asks Nate taking a sip of his coffee.
none of your damn business
"Nobody, I have to go now, bye babes, bye guys," I say leaving avoiding the question because I doubt if it's any of his business.
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After school Geezy walks me to where i can wait for my uber heading to work as we talk. Yes i went to school in my uniform with a hoody on top, didn't have time to be changing outfits honestly. I take this opportunity to ask him about Cassius's weird slight distancing.
"Nah he has been available probably really busy though, Cassius was just in the booth yesterday adding the adilibs that you recorded for him that time to his song" says Geezy answering my question.
My adlibs? Wait how did they...
"Aight I know you're probably wondering what adlibs and how i got them but remember that time i asked you to do some vocals? Well i did a little producing magic and it sound firrreee in Cassius's raps, i hope you're okay with that," he adds the last part really quick
I didn't really mind about them using my voice for they're track. I actually think it's pretty cool. I think about Cassius spending all his time with his song and barely making time for me. I mean i'm not tripping or nothing because of course he needs to get the Greyhound deal that he's always talking about but I miss him. My face then goes from being excited to disappointed and Geezy notices.
"Aight check, I'm not trying to be in your business or none but I know you and Cassius are together and yeah he's my hommie but I just think you should be careful with him you know like he gets really in his zone and it's hard for him to make time for other things."
red fucking flags I SEE REDDDDDD (y'all watch 365 days right) 😏
Wait he knew? I just assumed he didn't because we never really spoke about Cassius and every time we'd hang out as the four of us Cassius and I would act normal since we wanted to keep it low key. Keeping it low was mainly his idea but i guessed because he didn't want to make the dynamic of the friend group to be weird.
"Nah nah it's fine I'm not stressing about it and about me and him," I lied.
"I would've told you but I didn't want you to think he is the only reason why I hang out with you and we were keeping it low key," I add him.
And it's the truth, Geezy has become one of my good friends for the past month and I don't want what I have with Cassius to ruin things or make it weird between us.
"Don't stress about it Ayesha I understand and yes I knew, it was kinda hard not to notice y'all eye fucking each other," he says laughing.
"Man shut up," I laugh with him.
"Anyways, my other hommie from back in high school that i hope you aren't fucking too is having a party this Friday, y'all wanna come through?", asks Geezy.
hahaha🙄
Maybe that's what I need, might get my mind off the overthinking and hopefully see Cassius and the party. I also use it as an excuse to avoid being in that apartment with Nate this weekend. I know that nigga ain't got no damn friends except for Mike who's constantly up my besties insides.
I say yes and he tells me he'll send me the address. I wait for my uber whilst I think about texting Cassius if he wants us to pull up to the party together but then rethink it since i don't want to be much of a distraction to him so i leave it.
also ain't tryna look thirsty or none
I get home at 7pm after work and I'm so tired i just wanna shower, eat and catch up on some Neflix series.
"Chris? I'm back," I shout out heading to look for her in her room. The apartment is empty and I assume the boys went out since they aren't in the living room where they chill usually.
I follow the sounds coming from her bathroom guessing she was taking a shower as she usually does when she's not burning the kitchen with her cooking after school.
"Aye Chrissy! Oh shit! I'm sorry I thought it was Chrissy...so sorry... I'm going to close the door now...sorry again."
Tell me why this nigga is showering in Chrissy's bathroom!? Nate was showering in Chrissy bathroom Damn. Way to make things more awkward between us now bitch. That was so embarrassing. Gosh. He just stood there laughing whilst I was dying of embarrassment.
I go in my room cringing at the thought of what i had just done and change out of my work clothes. I then go chill on the couch after minutes of trying to convince myself to lock myself in my room and never come out.
where Chrissy and Mike at anyway?
"Yo," says Nate walking over to sit with me on the couch. Damn it.
"Hey...umm I'm sorry about walking in on you, I really thought it was Chrissy," I apologize trying to avoid eye contact keeping my eyes mostly glued to the TV.
"Well Chrissy went out with Mike and about the shower thing, it's aight," he says.
"Alright umm cool then," I reply released to have got that conversation out of the way.
"The shower in the guest bathroom ain't working so i asked her if i could use hers before she left,"
I just nod.
"Yeah, ain't like you ain't seen allat before anyway," he says smiling and still looking at me. I can't help but roll my eyes playfully and scoff at the statement.
"This has gotta be the most we've spoken since I came here you know," he says breaking the silence.
this nigga stay talking
"My bad, been hella busy," I reply.
"Come on Ayee. that's really the best excuse you can some up with?," he says and he's right, the excuse i came up with wasn't the reason him and I haven't spoken but there's no way I was going to tell him that it feels weird when we're in the same room together, it brings back old memories, good and bad, the ones I forced myself to forget so that I could get over him and thank goodness i did. I just needed more time to get used to him i guess.
"You're right Nate, the real reason I've been avoiding you is because I'm a superhero and there's a whole town that needs me so i have no time for long conversations," i say sarcastically trying to keep a straight face.
"Still not funny huh?," he says after rolling his eyes and chuckling.
"Well you laughing aren't you? So actually I am funny," I say finally looking at him.
"That wasn't funny,"
"You're right, what's funny are then ugly ass cornrows daaammnn Nate, you've been walking around with those in your hair?," I ask hysterically laughing pointing at his cornrows that really need immediate attention cause woah.
"Now that's what's fucking funny," i say wiping the tears in my eyes from laughing too hard. Hadn't even noticed his hair was fucked up.
"It's not even that funny and instead of laughing at me you could at least help me with renewing them," he says scratching his hair
"Aight aight I'm only saying yes because I actually feel sorry for your ass, come sit," i say as i signal him to sit on the floor between my legs so that i can plait his hair.
I used to do this when we were still together and made sure his cornrows looked fire after he got his trim at the barber. I stand up leaving him on the floor and go get a comb from Chrissys room since i don't have the need to have one because of my dreadlocks. Chrissy usually has on lace fronts so i do her cornrows before she wears her wigs. I come back and get to work whilst me and him talk and catch up.
I don't even know what I was acting weird for in the beginning judging from how completely not awkward the conversation is going.
"Aight finally done, hhmm i am good at what i do damn look at youu," i say whipping out my phone and showing him his reflection through the screen.
"Okay okay I see you," he says pleased with the final look licking his pink lips and rubbing his hands together.
"Shoulda got this done sooner," he adds on getting up from the couch and dusting his oversized black shirt.
"Where my money at cause my neck ain't hurting this bad for no bag?," I say as i feel my neck hurting probably from facing down to plait Nate and also from work. My body was generally just sore and not in a good way. I then see Nate walk behind the couch and placing his huge hands on the back of my shoulders just below my neck.
"Woah, what's happening," i say shocked at his quick movement and actions.
"Relax aight, the least I can do to pay you back for doing my hair with a massage so just chill," he says and before i can protest he starts rubbing his soft hands on my neck and going down my shoulders.
damn this feels good.
I let out a loud sigh of relief and then a moan of pleasure from the massage.
"You good bro?," he asks chuckling
"My bad it's just that work has been stressful and I'm busting my ass in music school, I'm tryna graduate and get my degree by the end of the year and also make my parents proud then there's looking for a career to do with music production and all that shit that i have to do after i graduate-...It's just a lot," I say throwing my head back as he gets all my good spots
"You're just overthinking as usual I know you've got this, you've been knowing what you want even back when we was dating, plus music's your thing, remember when you completely destroyed the competition in that talent show...man I was so proud of you..." he says wondering off.
The room is then filled with silence. He just had to bring that up. I wasn't going to say anything even though I really want to but i'm not going to make the situation more awkward than it already is.
"Look Ayesha..." says Nate stopping his massage and walking over to sit next to me on the couch.
here we go
"I really fucked up with you, from the talent show to just generally the way I treated you and how everything ended up..i'm genuinely sorry, I literally just ghosted you after all you had done for me and I was immature, selfish not to mention an asshole-,"
i know that's right
"Nate it's okay," I say interrupting him. It really was okay because I had already forgave him for the sake of my peace even though he had never really apologized. This was my first time hearing him apologize about well...everything.
"I'm over what happened between us really and I forgive you," I add on genuinely.
"Are you sure?," he asks me with a slight shocked face.
"Yeah I mean you're staying here in my apartment, if i hadn't forgiven you i would've probably put a pillow over your head whilst you sleep to suffocate your ass," I say with a smile on my face
"Should I be scared?," he says laughing and i just laugh with him.
We spend the rest of the night talking and catching up. Truth be told i had actually kinda missed these conversations and laughing with him just made me think of home and in a way cured my home sickness. We talk until midnight when i finally call it a night because i had to get up early for school and work the next day.
I get into my room and decide to text Cassius. Him and I haven't really been texting, spoken or even seen each other in a week which is really weird. I go to our chat and see three of my messages that i had sent before left on delivered.
Wow. Is he ghosting me? Was it something I did?
I just put the phone down and decide to leave it like that. He'll talk to me when he feels like it or whatever. I ain't calling this nigga.
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what y'all think about Ayesha forgiving Nate
Nate and Ayesha?
Cassius's shady ass behavior?
YALL DONT PLAY WITH ME ABOUT THESE COMMENTS AIGHT!!?!?!! 🤪