Chapter Twenty Five: Running
There are good things about becoming famous on Instagram, I get brand deals here and there and I also get a lot more followers and supporters.
I'm always thankful for the people who loved my books and my photoshoots.
I'm always going to be grateful for everything that I have now. I'm happy with the kind of life I am living right at the moment.
But there are also risks when it comes to being famous, one of them is possibly--stalkers.
"I..."
'Di ako makapagsalita, wala akong masabi, 'di ako paniwala sa nakikita ko, this is the third time this week and I could tell that this is serious.
"Okay..."
Huminga ako ng malalim at ngiti na lang ang binigay ko sa empleyado tsaka ko tinanggap yung tray na may almusal mula sa kanya, nagpasalamat na rin ako sa kanya at sinarado ang pinto pagkatapos.
Jesus Christ. I swear I have no idea what is happening and whoever sent me breakfast again.
Nung nakaraan pa 'to. Three days ago, nakatanggap ako ng almusal mula sa empleyado ng building ng apartment ko.
May restaurant sila dito sa building, 'di naman ako mahilig na bumili ng pagkain dito kasi mahal kaya luto na lang o McDo.
May nanlibre sa'kin nung araw na yun, I found it odd dahil wala rin silang sinabi kung kanino galing at kung sino ang nanlibre.
Para bang tinatago nila kung kanino galing.
Okay lang ako no'n, kaso pangatlong araw na ngayon at heto, may almusal pa rin ako galing sa kung sino mang nanlilibre sa'kin ng almusal.
It's different again. Bacon and eggs with some salad too, nung mga nakaraan may kanin at mga lumpia, kung ano yun nakalimutan ko na.
Now it looks like it's just a simple meal yet it also looks appetizing at the same time.
But why?
Bakit nila ako nililibre?
At sinong nanlilibre sa'kin ng almusal?
Stalker. That's all I could think about.
Kaso nga lang paano ko naman malalaman na stalker ko talaga ang nanlilibre sa'kin?
Maybe it's just someone... but who is this someone?
And why? Ano ba siya sa buhay ko? May kapitbahay ba 'ko dito sa building na nagustuhan ako dahil mabait ako sa kanila o kung ano?
Ewan ko ba.
Pero parang 'di ko gusto kung saan 'to papunta, I just don't. But how do I even find out who?
Masarap naman din yung pagkain, ayoko ring sayangin yung nilibre sa'kin, 'di ko inubos dahil may shoot ako today, mabilis pa naman akong mabloated kapag marami akong kinain.
Gutom ako kaya kumain ako ng konti.
Pagkatapos kong kumain naghimasa ako agad.
Nagmakeup ako pero 'di na 'ko naglagay ng foundation o ng concealer, buburahin ko naman din mamaya para sa shoot ko.
I wore a crop tank top and some Levi jeans.
Balak kong uminom ng Iced coffee ulet habang sinusulat ko yung libro ko, mamayang hapon pa yung shoot ko.
I had a hectic schedule yesterday kaya 'di ako nakapagsulat, nabibwisit ako sa tuwing naiisip ko yun.
Nakatatlong photoshoots ako yesterday, kinumpirma ni Silas today na isa lang ang shoot ko ngayong araw.
And yes, I do work for Silas' agency. I was one of the first people he asked to work for his agency, nang natapos na yung kontrata ko sa dati kong agency, lumipat agad ako since I trust Silas a lot when it comes to business.
He only gave me a few months for my contract, he wanted me to think about how the work is with his agency before I go for a two or three-year contract.
I'm thankful for that, of course. Ilang buwan na rin ang dumating at ibig sabihin no'n ay matatapos na ang kontrata ko kay Silas and I'm still not sure if I want to stay or not.
I'm still thinking about it.
They took care of me properly and that is something that my other agencies didn't do for me, I was overworked and I wasn't able to finish my books sometimes kaya kinailangan ko pa noon na tapusin ang pagsusulat hanggang umaga.
'Di ko na tinali ang buhok ko at pumunta na 'ko sa coffee shop ulet, as always I ordered my Iced coffee again.
Tsinek ko lang yung mga emails ko at schedules ko just in case na may nakalimutan pala akong gawin today.
So far so good, nireplyan ko lang yung mga brands na gustong makipagcollab sa'kin for an Instagram picture and a TikTok video too.
Malaki laki rin ang ibibigay nila sa'kin, I've gotten deal two offers this week, that's pretty good.
Tinapos ko ang Iced coffee ko at lumabas na 'ko mula sa coffee shop.
Naglakad ako sa kabilang restaurant ng coffee shop, meron kasing restaurant na hindi masyadong kilala dito sa side ng kalsada.
Bibili ako ng tanghalian para pag tapos na yung shoot ko for today pwede na 'kong lumamon ulet, of course hindi porket lamon ay talagang kakainin ko na ang lahat lahat 'no.
I'm only going to eat rice and some ulam lang, yun lang talaga. Pero parang gusto kong kumain ng french fries sa McDo eh.
I'm craving again, baka naman kasi malapit na 'ko magkaroon ulet, tsk, tang ina.
Makabili na nga rin ng tampon o kahit pads na lang din, mauubusan na yata rin ako.
Pagkatapos kong umorder ng pagkain para sa tanghalian mamaya, bumili na rin ako ng mga pads at tampons at bumalik ako sa apartment ko.
Nag-ayos ako ulet bago ako pumunta sa venue ng shoot, sa loob lang din ng building ng agency ni Silas yung shoot.
It's a shoot to promote the models of his agency, it can also serve as a profile picture on the official website. Pero to be honest, this is not needed kasi baka magpalit ako ng ibang agency.
I think we're also shooting with a brand deal, would you look at that, pangatlong brand deal ko na this week?
What is going on? Ang dami ko nanamang kikitain dito! I'm just grateful for everything at this point, I'm thankful.
"Naks." sigaw ni Silas pagpasok ko sa loob ng room kung nasaan nagaganap yung photoshoot for the agency.
"Casual, huh?"
"Pake mo?" I smirked.
"Pake ko dahil boss mo 'ko, Katerina Grace Miranda. Just checking on your image, baka may makakita sa'yo at pikturan ka, sige." asar niya.
"I'm a model, not a celebrity." I chuckled.
Silas Nakamoto. He's one of my best friends and he's never changed, perhaps he matured and learned to become one of the up-and-coming successful business owners in the near future.
He was known for his pictures and being a model for runaway shows in America before becoming widely known in the Philippines.
Of course, he's also a Nakamoto so a lot of people anticipated him too. Successful din ang business niya which is the agency I'm working for at the moment.
He's growing too fast, ang dami ng mga brand deals with his models and the agency too.
I don't think it's because he's a Nakamoto, but because he's just damn good at managing his agency.
He doesn't need to prove himself, his agency does it for him.
Yabang niya, tsk.
"I'm trying to be caring boss, Katerina, c'mon!"
"Kailangan ka naman naging caring? Puro ka asar, you're just happy that I'm attending the shoot for you today."
"You know that I'm happy that you accepted this job for me, right?" dagdag pa niya.
I accepted this job because he begged me for this. He needed a partner, tinanong ko siya kung bakit 'di na lang si Charlotte pero wala, busy daw yung 'girlfriend' niya.
Kahit na siya ang CEO at owner ng agency niya, he's still a signed model. He found modeling as something to be passionate about, I was shocked when he built a modeling agency, but I guess when it comes to something he's passionate about, he'll do everything for it.
As his friend, I am proud of him.
This is not the first time we've had a photoshoot together before, this is our third time.
"Of course you are, you want things to be the way you want them to be, Mr. CEO." natawa siya sa sinabi ko at binato ko na lang yung bag ko sa kanya.
Pumasok ako sa loob ng fitting room with the stylists, the theme of the photoshoot is all about looking bare and natural.
It's a skincare collab with the agency, I had to remove my makeup and use some of the products from the skincare brand.
Naglagay ako ng lip gloss para medyo glossy daw ang buong look pati na ring nag labi ko.
Wet hair too para sa shoot, we're really going for this all-natural but bare look too.
It didn't really take us an hour to prepare and look good, paglabas na'ming dalawa ni Silas naghahanda pa rin yung mga photographers at yung mga staff din.
Umupo kaming dalawa ni Silas sa harap ng camera habang hinihintay na'min sila.
"How was your novel?"
"Good, malapit ko na siyang matapos."
"Good! I want your autograph after, alright?"
"Anong autograph? Bilhin mo muna! Walang libre libre, Nakamoto."
Naaalala ko yung unang beses na naging kilala yung libro ko, nanghingi siya ng isang libro 'di man lang niya binayaran pagkatapos ako na lang ang nagbayad.
The more I publish more of my books the more he asked for it and then wanted some autograph too.
"I'm using my best friend card."
"Anong best friend card?"
Nang-aasar pa rin siya, pero at least hindi tulad dati na lagi siyang nang-aasar as in minu-minuto o araw-araw talaga.
He's more into his business so he doesn't really have any time when it comes to teasing someone specifically one of his good friends.
"Your boss card na lang."
"Bwisit ka ba? Bilhin mo, kung kaibigan mo talaga ako susuportahan mo by actually buying it. Mayaman ka rin kaya gamitin mo naman yung pera mo pa minsan minsan." nguso siya agad sa sinagot ko.
Suporta suporta rin kapag may time, Nakamoto.
Napansin ko na para bang may gusto siyang itanong sa'kin pero ayaw niya lang ilabas sa bunganga niya, I sighed and laughed at him.
"C'mon."
"Huh?"
"Say it."
"What?" tiningnan ko siya nang mariin.
"Alam kong may gusto kang itanong, kahit kahapon pa nung tinanong mo 'ko for this shoot parang may gusto kang itanong sa'kin na 'di mo lang mailbas diyan sa bibig mo. Spill it now while they're still preparing..."
There's still a few minutes before we start it's just we prepared early for us tsaka inaasahan ko sana na simulan na yung shoot kaso heto, naghihintay pa rin kami.
"Him."
Ah, of course. Yun ang gusto niyang itanong.
Ang tanong ko naman ngayon sa utak ko kung aasarin niya ba 'ko o seryoso talaga ang itatanong niya.
"What happened between the two of you?"
"Akala ko alam mo na, baka nasabi niya na sa'yo."
Magkaibigan naman din sila, baka nasabi niya na kay Silas kung ano man yung nangyari.
Medyo nalito nga ako nun eh, ewan ko kung bakit o saan nanggaling yung galit niya.
"He's upset, like... upset, Rina."
"Di ko na problema yun, it's his issue. Are you sure na wala kang alam? That's impossible, I think you know something, do you?" tinaas ko yung kaliwang kilay ko sa kanya.
"I heard that he got upset because he found out about you meeting your ex-boyfriend again."
So may alam nga talaga siya. Umaakto pa siyang parang 'di niya alam, of course may alam siya.
Kung 'di sinabi sa kanya ni Alexander, maririnig naman niya yun sa iba, maybe from one of the Manuel brothers, specifically Jaxon or Yael.
"And he didn't know that you had a boyfriend either."
Naalala ko yung gabi nung away na'min. They invited influencers, models, and other more important people in business.
We fought at the back of the venue, galit na galit siya nung nalaman niya yun, ewan ko ba kung bakit siya nagagalit?
Normal lang naman na magkaroon ako ng boyfriend 'di ba? Some people has never been in a relationship but some just get into one because it happens.
So anong issue niya?
"I don't know. 'Di ko alam kung bakit siya galit na galit."
"Simple. Jealousy."
Natawa ako sa sinabi niya, napatakip pa 'ko sa bibig ko kasi baka maabala ko yung mga staff sa preparation nila.
"As if."
"What do you mean by 'as if'? Isn't it obvious?"
Binilog ko pa ang mata ko, this is just ridiculous. If I was younger then I would've been happy with that kind of thought but I don't want to think of it anymore.
It's just funny, a thought, a ridiculous thought.
"Silas, Alexander is not in love with me. He's just feeling guilty for what happened in the past, he has this sense of protecting me so that I won't get hurt again. Ha..." kahit ako natatawa sa sinabi ko.
"...the only person that he should be protecting me from is himself."
Nag-tama ang mga mata na'min agad ni Silas sa sinabi ko, seryoso siyang nakikinig sa'kin at naiintindihan niya ang ibig kong sabihin.
"He was feeling guilty, he still is feeling guilty about it..."
"Okay, we're ready!"
Akala ko mabilis lang ang shoot for today pero maraming mga nangyari kaya 'di maaga natapos yung trabaho.
There were technical issues and stuff like that, hanggang sa punto na kinailangan na'ming subukan ang ibang mga pose at iba ring mga camera.
Silas hated it, he didn't like where it was going so he warned the staff and specifically the photographer.
People make mistakes but when it comes to business and work, Silas hates mistakes.
Nung natapos na yung shoot, nagpaalam na 'ko sa mga staff at pati na rin kay Silas na kakausapin pa yung staff tungkol sa pag-eedit ng mga pictures at kung kailan nila isesend sa brand pagkatapos ng lahat ng mga ganung bagay.
I was gonna talk to Silas about my contract with him but right now I have to think about other things which are my novel and spending time with myself.
Pwede naman na'ming pagusapan yun pagkatapos o bukas na lang.
Plano kung maligo bago ako ako kumain at manood ng anime ulet, pagod na pagod din ako.
Mas lalo akong napagod dahil sa pinagusapan na'min ni Silas, parang nawalan ako ng gana ngayong araw dahil sa kanya.
Just thinking about Alexander annoys me. It's so complicated, he is complicated.
'Di rin nakakatulong yung sinabi sa'kin ni Silas na jealousy daw ang dahilan.
See? Mag-iisip nanaman ako ni'to mamayang gabi tapos 'di ako makakatulog, ayoko na nun.
'Di ko nga lang alam kung anong gagawin ko kapag nagkita ulet kami.
We have the same friends and even if I try to avoid my friends for a while I still have Genevieve, she's somewhat connected to Alexander because he is a Cardoza, it's inevitable.
Which means whatever happens... our paths will continue to cross, and I could never ever avoid him.
And besides, we're talking about a decade of friendship here. Do I really want to end this just because of an unnecessary fight?
Importante pa rin siya sa'kin.
I can't just let go of our friendship.
But this time I can't be the first one to talk to him about this.
He is the one with the problem here, not me.
Natigil ako sa harap ng coffee shop ng maramdaman ko yung phone ko sa bulsa ko, notification o baka text message.
Maybe it's Genevieve, she wants me to buy her some treats or something, stress nanaman siya.
Bibili muna ako ng frappe ko ulet, hihi!
Pag bukas ko pa lang ng pinto ng coffee shop ay napansin ko agad ang pamilyar na likod ng isang taong hindi pa 'ko handang kausapin.
Yes, I've thought about it. I've thought about him talking to me again so we could end this fight but I realized at that time that I wasn't fully prepared to talk to him again after what he had just pulled that night.
That night was shocking to me. I've seen him upset because we've had fights before but that night was intense, he was crazy, he wasn't the Alexander I knew.
And I still don't understand why he had to be that upset.
"Rina."
And then he's smiling again, he's smiling as if nothing truly happened that night.
Why? Why was he that upset?
Remember, he was feeling guilty about what happened when I saw him inside that bathroom with another woman in his arms.
"Rina, I... I've been--"
I didn't look back nor hesitate and just left the coffee shop, I ran as fast as I could and it was the first time that I've felt something like this before.
I am actually running away from Alexander because I was scared to talk to him about it. To ask him why.
But I know. I know what his answer would be.
He's still feeling guilty for breaking my heart that day.