*Mature Content Warning*
I've talked before about the 5 stages of grief and how I had discovered a 6th one. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, and revenge.
In the loneliness of Draco's room with only a small book of his words to keep me company, I've had time to come up with a 7th stage of grief.
Regrets
——
5 years prior
"Drake! You told me I could go with you when you were spying on them!" I whined, making him shoot me a challenging look. He was creeping his way towards the common room exit, insisting that Harry Potter was releasing a dragon out of the highest tower tonight.
"I don't want you involved in stuff like this. He's going to get in trouble, and you don't need to be there." He whispered-shouted back to me, trying to keep his voice down, but I only inched my way closer.
"I don't care! I'm going, too." I said shortly, crossing my arms over my chest. "And there's nothing you can do to stop me!" I argued. He gave me a devious grin and held up his wand.
"I can leg-lock you right now," he chuckled, flicking his wrist like he was going to send a spell at me. I furrowed my brows and snatched his wand out of his hand.
"I'm not Longbottom! You can't use your magic on me, I won't allow it!" I told him harshly, resulting in him shushing me just as loudly. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him, throwing his opposite palm against my mouth.
"Emmy, zip it!" He seethed in a quiet voice. "You're just as loud as you are stubborn!" He scolded me. I ripped his hand from my mouth and narrowed my eyes.
"Pretty please take me with you," I asked of him quietly. "I like when we go on adventures together. You always take those bimbos Crabbe and Goyle anymore." I said in a sad voice. He scoffed and interlocked our fingers together.
"You like those bimbos. They're your friends, too." He whispered, pulling me towards the exit with him.
"Yeah, but not when they steal you away all the time. Seriously, all that talk about them taking me from you, and instead they take you from me." I pouted. "S'not fair."
•
"I don't know professor, Draco told me there would be a dragon-"
"There is a dragon and it's escaping this castle right now without any of us catching them!" Draco shouted at Snape, who had received word from McGonagall that we were found in the corridors at midnight.
"And who is 'them,' Mr. Malfoy?" Snape pressed for more answers. Draco let out an annoyed sigh and continued his ranting.
"Potter, of course! And those weird friends of his. The mud blood and the blood traitor!" Draco was practically shouting while we sat side by side in identical chairs in front of Snape's desk.
A knock at the door interrupted our commotion before Snape stood up swiftly and stalked across the room to answer it.
"You have to help get us out of this!" Draco panicked, worry evident on his small and pale face. "Father will kill me. Please." He begged, reaching out for my hand and clasping on to it with his clammy one.
"Ew," I grimaced when I felt his palm, "you must be nervous. You're gross and sticky." I crinkled my nose up in disgust.
Snape came back and sat in his chair, he eyed the two of us down before he let out a long sigh.
"Potter and Granger were found in the halls, but there was no dragon. So, for lying to a professor and being out past curfew, I'm afraid you'll both be receiving a detention." He said flatly. My eyes widened and I felt my tears start to prickle in my eyes.
"No, I can't serve a detention! I have top marks in the class! I can't-"
"Professor, this is ridiculous! We were trying to help!" Draco said coldly, talking a little too boldly for having a conversation with a teacher.
"Don't make me take points from my own house for your cheek." He said lowly as he narrowed his eyes at the platinum haired boy. "Both of your father's will be getting owls from me in the morning." He said cooly.
"No!" Draco suddenly looked fear stricken.
"Your detention will be served next week. Go to bed. Now." Snape said slowly. I gulped once and nodded my head, small tears flowing down my cheeks.
Draco waited until we were outside the door before he took ahold of my hand and braided our fingers together. "Please, stay with me in my room." His high pitched voice whispered while we walked. "My father's going to kill me." He breathed out the phrase once more.
"Could be worse." I huffed, using the back of my hand to wipe my face.
"How could this possibly be worse?" Draco asked harshly.
"Snape could be your cousin. Father told me in a letter a few weeks back. His mother was a Prince. My grandfather and his mother were siblings." I sighed. "Father is going to be mortified. Don't be surprised if he kills me, too." Draco gave me a sympathetic look and he pursed his lips shut.
——
9 years prior
"I broke the vase!" I screamed, rounding a corner and bumping right into Draco, knocking him to the floor.
I rubbed my chin that had hit some part of his small body, letting out a small groan of pain. His brows were furrowed before he comprehended what I had said.
"Why were you even in that room?!" Draco asked me quietly, but his voice was still harsh and strict. I started to panic even more, tears streaming down my face and my shoulders shaking.
"Drake, I didn't mean to. I was making Peesy play hide and seek, and I bumped it, and it was an accident!" I cried, panting and sobbing while my face turned red as a brick.
Our parents were having some sort of meeting in the living room and had told us to stay out. Draco was practicing his skills in wizards chess in his library while I kept myself occupied.
"It's okay. Maybe they won't even not-"
"Draco! Emelia!" Lucius's voice boomed through the corridors of the manor, making my eyes widen from fear.
"Oh no, no, no," I cried, but Draco pulled me down another corridor to run away.
It wasn't my fault Lucius kept valuable dark artifacts around the house. Why would you have that vase there to begin with? At least put it out of a child's way, like my father does.
"I did it. Okay?" He asked me quickly while we could hear his father catching up to us. He wiped my face quickly with his hands and straightened himself out. "Just pretend you don't know anything. I'll take blame." He panted quickly before Lucius stalked towards us quickly.
His dress shoes pounded against the stone floor, making the noise echo all around us. He brought himself to a halt and glared down at the two of us.
"Which one of you did it?" He said lowly, his calm voice much more intimidating than his harsh one. Neither of us spoke, cowering down in front of him in the silence.
"Well?" He asked a little louder. Draco glanced down at the floor and kicked his feet.
"I did." He mumbled, trying his best to sound believable. I glanced over at him while I bit my lip, and less than a second later Lucius had Draco in a tight grasp on the back of his neck.
"Ow," Draco hissed, sucking in a quick breath.
"Emelia, you may leave. Draco is grounded." Lucius said coldly before he dragged the poor boy down the hallway.
•
"Emmy, please open the door." Draco's voice squeaked out from the opposite side of my white double door. It was his cry voice, I knew it from a mile away.
He knocked on the door again before I pulled it open slowly. He stood in front of me, sobbing, Mr. Teddy in hand, blanket draped over his shoulders, and his pjs covering his small limbs.
"My mother- she dropped me off to stay the night. They're fighting again." He cried. I shuffled out of the way and let him through to enter the room.
He immediately made his way over to my bed, climbing inside and waiting for me to come over. I crawled into my large bed that no longer felt so empty and gave him a hug.
"I thought I couldn't see you because you were grounded. I was so worried. Why are they fighting?" I whispered, feeling him dig his little chin into my shoulder and sob loudly into my ear.
"He hit me and mother got mad," he cried. My eyes widened and my voice dropped even lower. I felt guilt churning my stomach into large knots.
"Because I broke the vase...?" I questioned, earning a nod in response. "Drake, I didn't mean for you to get hurt. You shouldn't be in trouble, it's all my fault." I shook my head, but he just shrugged while he finally started to calm down.
"Better me than you." He sniffled, curling up against my body.
•
3 days ago
Draco, I don't want to keep doing this without you.
I put down my quill and patiently waited for an answer. The fire whiskey burned as it traveled down the back of my throat. I screwed the lid back on and placed it on his bedside table.
I flipped back through the previous pages and read some of the old messages. None had come through recently. I opened it in the morning after a long nights sleep and the most recent page was full of the same phrase repeated over and over, the last couple lines getting sloppier and sloppier.
"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I'm sorry, I love you, I'm sorry, I love you."
No explanation, no responses, just empty pages that only contained my own writing.
I hadn't even noticed Blaise pushing the door open until he sat down next to me in the dark room.
"Well, if we're drinking, pass me the fucking bottle." He huffed, holding out his hand and grabbing the bottle by its long neck when I handed it over.
"I'm not getting him back, am I?" I whispered. My dead eyes stared straight in front of me and caught my reflection in the mirror that Draco had in his room.
I was a wreck. Hair in a bun. Draco's huge sweats swallowing my small body. I hadn't left the room in days. Blaise chugged down most of the bottle before he threw himself back against the pillows and didn't give an answer.
He didn't know. Didn't want to give me any false hope, I guess.
"He's actually a fucking lunatic." Blaise whispered, and I didn't say another word. "I'm really sorry, Emmy. I tried everything. But at least he's still in there." He mumbled out, trying his best to keep things positive.
"Promise he is?" I whispered, keeping my stare on my broken reflection in the mirror.
"He told me today that he loved you, so he is. Dropped it casually while I asked him about you." He chuckled, tipping his head back and drinking more liquor.
"What'd he say?" I asked him in a low voice, fiddling with my fingers in my lap.
"I just said 'I think I'm gonna go see Emmy tonight before she goes to bed. You remember Emmy, right?' Just wanted to see what he said. They stopped his treatments and he's back to doing his tasks again... a little too well." He swallowed thickly while he shrugged his shoulders.
"He laughed at me like I was crazy. 'You've gone mental if you think I don't remember my Emmy.' Something along those lines. 'I've loved her since before I could crawl. I'm gonna marry that girl, you fucking moron'." Blaise laughed while he changed his voice to mimic Draco. I let out a soft giggle before I took the bottle back. "I'm a little tipsy now, I might be exaggerating some of it." He laughed.
"That's a good sign I guess." I sighed, throwing back some of the liquor. "I just wish I could talk to him." He let out a stifled laugh before he closed his eyes and rested for a moment.
"Maybe if you're lucky he'll answer that journal for you." Blaise said tiredly, letting a long yawn escape his lips.
"If I was lucky, none of this would've happened to me in the first place." I whispered, dragging my knees up against my chest and laying the bottle down on the table next to me.
"I shouldn't have let him go." I said in a hushed voice. "I should have never let him go." I shook my head. "I want to go to bed. You can stay if you'd like." I mumbled, laying down under Draco's comforter and letting my head hit the pillow.
Blaise snored in response, making me roll my eyes and throw a pillow over my head.
•
I walked through the garden slowly, dragging my hand across the shrubs that were bare and just mere twigs. Nothing would grow in these cold days, not until early March— at least.
"You ready for breakfast, my dear?" Narcissa called out the back door while I looked out across the quidditch field, wishing to see Draco flying in circles around it again.
"I am." I breathed out, turning and giving her a smile. My floral dress blew in the slight breeze, and I hugged Draco's cream colored sweater against my torso.
I jogged up to the door and returned back into the house where I was greeted by the scent of fresh breakfast. My caramel curls flowed down my back while the top half of them were held back in a cream colored ribbon.
"You look cute, Emmy." Narcissa smiled while she placed a few plates down on the top of the kitchen counter. "No point in going to the dining room when there's just two of us." She chuckled, taking a seat on one of the bar stools.
"I'm sorry I haven't joined you for a meal in... well, weeks." I gave a weak giggle as I sat next to her. "But I woke up today, and things felt... different, I guess." I shrugged. She had a small smile on her face while she spread jam across her toast.
"Maybe that's a sign. Maybe something will happen today." She said hopefully, looking over at me and running her hand over the top of my head. I looked at her out of the side of my eyes.
"Like what? My mother will come back? Or my father will remember me again? Or my boyfriend will stop being a ruthless killer for five minutes and live a normal life with me?" I asked sarcastically, making Narcissa shoot me a look. I gave a sorry smile and wished I could swallow my words.
I knew none of this was her fault, and I couldn't act like it was. Besides, I don't think she liked hearing me say things like that about her son.
"Emelia, watch your cheek." She warned, and I already knew she didn't like the way I was speaking. "Plus, if your mother hasn't returned by now, I just worry..." she let out a long breath instead of finishing her sentence.
"Never mind that. Thank you for eating with me today. I'm glad to see you out of that bedroom." She changed the subject to something more lighthearted. I gave her a smile before I started cutting into the waffles that sat on my plate.
We talked about a few stupid things, and I laughed every once in a while as Narcissa made a few jokes.
"Does it make you sad that Lucius isn't here anymore?" I asked her, making a silence fall over us. She thought for a moment and bit the inside of her cheek.
"I never loved him. And he hurt Draco countless times. And he wanted to hurt you." She listed off these things like it was a no brainer. "I think I'm just shocked Draco made it 16 years without killing him before he did." She told me, her eyes slightly narrowed into slits as she looked at me.
I nodded slowly, completely understanding where she was coming from. Draco and I were in love. She didn't feel the pain I felt for Drake over Lucius, but she did feel it over her only child.
"I just think that-"
A loud crash and shattering glass cut off my sentence while I jumped in my seat. Narcissa whipped her head towards the kitchen entrance and before I could process it I was being dragged outside.
"This can't be good." Narcissa breathed out while she dragged my bare feet across the grass. "Shit." She cursed while she stopped in her tracks, making me run into her from the sudden halt. She looked around before we swirled and my feet landed on the hard floor of Draco's room.
I was beyond confused. She didn't look as though she completely knew what she was doing either. "I have no where to take you, love." She panted, looking around his room for somewhere to hide. "I was worried they'd come fore you. They want your mother so badly." She shook her head as defeat glossed over her eyes. I was trying to look for words, questions to ask her, but nothing came out.
I could hear someone approaching us out in the corridor and I grabbed her hands and squeezed my eyes shut, hoping and praying that this wouldn't end so badly after all.
Maybe this is for the best. Maybe it would just be easier if I was completely gone for Draco. I had nothing else going for me anymore anyway.
No more school. No parents. A war was brewing and my future husband was killing hundreds of people by the day. Maybe I didn't need to live anymore.
"Mum, open the door. I don't have a wand." My eyes shot open while I practically sprinted towards the door.
I came to a stop when I felt a hand grip my wrist tightly. "It might be a trap." She whispered, trying to keep her voice down. I shook my head and pulled my wrist free before I ran to the door and pried it open.
I let out a loud sob when my eyes met his ocean ones. His hair was cut shorter since the last time I saw him, and he had on his usual suit. This has to be a dream. It couldn't be real.
"I broke a vase on my way in." He pushed out, but he still held a bewildered expression. I felt frozen, unable to do anything but cry.
He didn't move a muscle either. He stared at me for a moment, taking it all in. I could feel my hands shaking as they reached up towards him, but he grabbed my waist and pulled me into him tightly.
"You're so beautiful." He whispered into my ear, making my sobs echo into the corridor even louder— while they also probably bursted his eardrums. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and felt my feet leave the floor while he lifted me.
I wrapped my legs around his waist and held on so tightly. His sweet smell lingered into my airways and made me feel like it was a million times easier to breathe.
I could feel him walking further into his room, and I hardly noticed Narcissa pressed against my back while she held on to both of us.
"How did you- how long are you here?!" Narcissa asked him in a state of astonishment, but I couldn't pull away as easily as she could.
I had waited months for this moment, and I wasn't giving up on embracing him for as long as I could.
"They don't know I'm here. I left my wand— that's what they've been tracking me on. Everyone left on a mission, and I tried convincing myself to stay away from here, but I couldn't." He said defeatedly, his cheek pressed against the side of my head.
"And you're sure they aren't just making sure you wouldn't come running across the street?" She asked him frantically, and I knew the long pause he took wasn't the best response.
"Well... no, but-"
"Draco!" She scolded, but he cut her off quickly.
"Mother, I had to come make sure you two were alright." He told her, making her let out a long breath. My cries were starting to slow as I buried my nose against the side of his neck.
"Well, then I'll go make you a lunch and you can get settled in. I'm sure you two have catching up to do before you have to leave." She said sweetly, and I could feel her hand brushing against the hair on the top of his head before the air of her leaving swept across the room and I heard the door click shut.
"I love you so much." I croaked out, my tears starting to pick up once again. He let out a soft hum and hugged me tighter, swaying us back and forth slowly.
"I love you, too, pretty girl." He sighed, leaning his face away from mine in an effort to let him see my face.
I pulled my face out of his neck and looked into his eyes as I watched his big smile cross across his face. It was contagious, making my own teeth flash back and mirror his.
"There she is." He chuckled, brushing my baby hairs away from my red and tear filled eyes. "My beautiful girl." He breathed out. His lips pressed against mine so slowly and perfectly, I felt like I couldn't get any air into my lungs from the breathless feeling.
He slowly walked me backwards before he sat me on his bed. He glanced around his room before he walked over to his desk and picked up my wand.
"Muffliato. Colloportus."
He placed it back on the table top before he threw his jacket over the back of his work chair. He raised a brow at me while a soft smirk lingered on his lips and it took me a half a second to rip his sweater up over my head and toss it across the room.
He chuckled at me while he unbuttoned his shirt and removed it, revealing a sight I never thought I'd see. My smile dropped as I stared at his paled skin, beaten and bruised. I crawled to the edge of the bed and sat in front of him, picking my fingers up and running them across his muscular figure.
Scars, bruises, cuts, scrapes, different forms of markings flooding his skin that once sat so clean in front of me.
This is all my fault.
"It's not your fault. Its my fault. It's from things I've done. Things I wish I could change sometimes when it's quiet at night and I'm alone." He mumbled, looking down at my skinny fingers that rubbed him soothingly.
"Did you just read my mind?" I asked him breathlessly, earning a nod in response. "But you don't even have a wand. Wandless magic is one of the hardest things to master. Only the most power wizards and witches know how, and there aren't even many of them." I started rambling on. He chuckled at my hyper behavior while his hand grabbed my own and lifted my fingertips up to his lips, where he kissed them gently.
"I am more powerful than you could ever imagine, sweetheart." He laughed lightly, the sound coming out so airy and pure. I could've cried hearing it ring through my ears again.
"I will always love you, Draco. No matter what happens or what you do— I am always going to love you so much." I told him, my throat starting to tighten as I stared into his grey eyes. He gave me a half smile and nodded his head knowingly.
My lips planted themselves against a few of the bruises on his chest, feeling his heart beating under underneath them. I covered as many as I could with gentle kisses, making his heart start beating a little faster in his chest.
"And you know that I will always love you." He whispered, sliding both of his hands to my cheeks before he pushed his lips against mine longingly.
His chilly hands slid down to my shoulders and around to my back before they made me shiver. He let out a laugh at the feeling, knowing he would have this effect on me after so much time away.
"Your hands are cold." I muttered while he started to unzip my dress. My fingers started to play with the prickly hairs in the back of his head while my nose was brushing against his.
"You make me so warm though." He whispered, sounding like he was just as choked up as I was— like he was having a hard time finding his voice. He found his belt and removed it from his waist, quickly undoing his pants and letting them fall onto his wooden floor.
I let my dress fall down my shoulders, laying back on my back so he could pull it off of my body completely. I slowly crawled back on his bed and watched as he crawled over top of me.
"No bra today?" He chuckled, running his hand over my stomach and up to my breast, twisting and playing with my nipple in between his fingers. His index finger did a few loops around the outer edge of my nipple, making me feel feral at his touch.
I tried to answer him, but only a moan escaped my lips as my back arched up off of his silky bedspread to feel more. "And needy." He noted huskily, sitting comfortably on his knees in between my legs.
His opposite head cupped the side of my neck before his lips found the tender skin above my collarbone. I let out an agitated moan while I gripped my fingers into his shoulders.
"I've missed you." I breathed out, trying to force words out of my throat. "Fucking hell, have I missed you." I panted. He nodded in agreement, not letting his lips leave my skin.
His fingers trailed away from my chest and found themselves at the hem of my underwear, fiddling with it for a moment before he finally got his hands to work the way he wanted them to.
It had been so long since we had felt each other, let alone be intimate. We were in a silly argument the last time I had so much as kissed him. Weeks I had recklessly avoided him out of pettiness and fear. What an idiot I was to stay away from him like that by choice.
My underwear was freed from my legs, leaving me exposed in front of him. I felt so intoxicated by his scent, his touch, his lips on my collarbone, everything about him left me feeling so weak.
"Fuck-" I cursed loudly, but the word came out as a sort of hiss. His fingers had slowly glided themselves in side of me, not giving me any warning before they kept their steady pace.
Draco lingered his lips over my neck, fanning his heavy and hot breath across my delicate skin that was covered in tiny bruises now. "You are so perfect, Emmy Jane." He whispered, his voice so hushed even I could hardly hear it.
Maybe he was doing that on purpose. Maybe he truly was talking to himself, and just wanted to take mental notes on how every second of this reunion with one another went down.
He continued to please me so carefully with his fingers, gently stroking them in and out of my core. I could feel my body aching for more as he continued his movements. The pit in my lower stomach felt like it was clenching tighter and tighter, and my legs started to squeezing together around his body between them.
"Drake, that feels so good." I breathed out, rocking my own hips impatiently, but with his rhythm.
"How good does it feel, baby?" He whispered, making me nod my head rapidly. "Talk to me. I want to hear your pretty voice." He begged, making me feel even weaker as his sweet words traveled through my ears.
"It feels wonderful," I breathed out, my eyes shut and my head tilting back on the mattress. "I want all of you. I want you inside of me, I want to feel you." I told him without any doubts.
His fingers carefully pulled out of my body before he mumbled a contraceptive charm and pulled his duvet over his back so we were underneath.
"Emelia, I have missed you so much." He shook his head in disbelief. "I've wanted nothing more than to see you." He whispered, making my heart pang in my chest.
I could feel his tip slowly moving up and down between my legs as I grew more wet. I let out a loud moan as he finally inserted himself so steadily.
"Mine. Forever." He grunted, moving his hips even slower than the first time. I nodded along, pinching my eyes shut in the process.
"Yours. I'm always going to be yours. And you are mine." I struggled to push the words out while he rocked his hips into mine so carefully.
My fingers found their way to his scalp, rubbing his hair soothingly while he made me feel so good. It was like he was exploring every part of me. Perfectly hitting my sweet soft with each thrust, and earning a loud and throaty moan to escape me.
"Faster, Drake." I panted, but he shook his head, a few beads of sweat shaking off of the ends of his short hair.
"Let me make love to you, baby. Not like the other times. This is real." He grunted as he pushed himself in deeper.
"And raw." He groaned lowly, making me feel even weaker in between my legs.
"And it's pure." He pushed himself further this time, making my eyes flutter shut from the enjoyment that I couldn't even comprehend.
"And it's us." He grunted, but my mouth was stuck in an 'o' shape while I absorbed every second of pleasure that was making my toes curl.
"I want to think of this when I miss you. When I crave you. I want you to always remember this is how much you mean to me." He panted out between his strokes, but my moans were slipping from my lips so quickly it was hard to keep up.
"To share myself with you and you with me. You are everything to me. Despite the torture they put me through, I love you and you are everything to me." He mumbled, laying his sweating forehead against mine while our moans crossed paths.
"I'm gonna-"
"Please, darling. Please cum for me." He pleaded, wanting to feel me release myself around him. It didn't take much of his begging for me to give in and let our bodies be one with the other like they always had been.
I laid next to him when we had finished, curled up between his sheets and my limbs intertwined with his. His fingers moved with my mine so carelessly, hovering over our faces while our naked bodies entrapped their hot and sticky body heat within one another.
"I can't wait until you're mine forever." He whispered, making my heart flutter even more than it already had. He brought my fingers down to his lips and kissed each of them softly while I observed him.
"I am yours forever. I took a vow." I reminded him, wondering how much they had truly messed with his brain while he was away from me.
"No, not like that." He shook his head defiantly. "I'm talking about when I get to call you my wife and you'll live with me in my manor. When we have our babies and they get to run around the hollow like we did." He whispered, scooting a bit closer as if it were possible. But I let him.
Boy, did I let him.
I could feel every muscle aching to absorb every fiber that he had to provide me with. It felt like a selfish thing, to want to take someone like that. To want to soak up all of them for yourself to feel content, but it's all I wanted. Every ounce of him.
"We're gonna have the cutest babies, you and me. I'm gonna kiss you every single second of every day, and I'm never going to let anyone take you away from me ever again, baby. This is almost over, and it will give us a chance to finally restart this entire process and just be a normal engaged couple." He said seriously, though I hoped his statement about the war almost being over didn't mean something horrible and gruesome was on the way.
"I'll take you on picnics, and I'll make love to you every chance I get. I'll buy you all the nicest tokens and jewels and books and— fuck it, I'll buy you a castle. We don't even have to live here." He laughed, rubbing the tip of his nose against my hairline. My cheeks had so much blood rushing to them, I probably looked like a tomato.
"I'm so glad you are you." I whispered, rubbing my fingers across his skin wherever I could. Trying to take in every minute he could give me before he had to leave.
"And I'm glad you are you. And I am me. And we are us. And I could hold you like this forever and ever, my Emmy." He mumbled against the skin of my forehead before he moved his head and found my lips— his so soft and comforting.
I am melting. I am part of him. He is everything. I regret letting him down and letting him go. Again and again. One day I'll learn my lesson, but for now I did what I had to do.
He started to imagine a world so perfect for the two of us, it was almost like a dream. But one day it could be our reality.