┍━━━━━»•» «•«━┑
𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴.
┕━»•» «•«━━━━━┙
『𝙒𝘼𝙍 𝙋𝙊𝙑』
It's already evening and my eyes have been locked on my phone screen since an hour ago, waiting for Yin's call. I guess he already arrived in Chiang Mai at this hour but why didn't he call me yet?
Did he forget to call me?
Was he busy?
"Stop looking at your phone, War," Bonz said while shaking his head looking at me. We were in the library now to do some revision as our exam was just around the corner.
I sighed and put my head down on the table. If Yin were here, he would definitely ask if I was hungry, how I was feeling and whether I needed to sleep. But, he wasn't there right now, it felt so boring and lonely!!!
"Arghhh my body is so sore!" I muttered and hoped Yin was here and massaged me like he always did if he saw I'm tired.
"I will not massage you," Bonz replied.
"I also don't want you to touch me," I replied lazily while my head still rested on the table and I closed my eyes, wanting to take a quick nap before continuing to study.
My eyes opened as I was startled by a hand that suddenly massaged my shoulder and I quickly removed the hands from me when I realized who the person was.
"What are you doing?" I asked Pack who smiled at me and he then pulled the chair, sitting beside me.
"You look tired. I just want to help you." A broad smile still on his face and he tried to touch me again but I dodged.
"It's okay. I'm just fine," I replied awkwardly as after what happened a month ago, I still feel uncomfortable with him and the fact that he has continued to try to convince me of his feelings has just made me feel worse, especially when he does things like this.
"I have nothing to do right now and you also look very tired," he said and before I stopped him who tried to touch my shoulder again, Off suddenly came out from nowhere and gripped his wrist.
"Did you deaf and blind? Can you see he didn't feel comfortable with you?" Off pushed Pack's hand hard.
The mood at our table began to alter as Pack chuckled and Off looked at him coolly. I turned to glance at Bonz, who swallowed saliva as well as he noticed the ominous aura emanating from both of them.
Pack stood up while his hands were in his pocket and smirked in front of Off's face. "It's none of your business," he said.
"He's Yin's boyfriend. So it's my fucking business," Off replied and clenched his fists.
"It won't be long." Pack smirked and before Off replied, I immediately stood up to stop both of them as we were in the library right now and some of the students already looked in our direction.
"Off, let's go," I said and picked up my bag, making a signal to Bonz that I wanted to go first before Off and Pack made a scene here.
"You bother them, it means you bother me too, asshole," Off replied before following me to come out from the library.
∘✧──────✧∘
"Did he always bother you?" Off asked.
I just hummed.
"Did Yin know about this?"
I closed my eyes for a second and looked at him. "Can you not tell him? I don't want him to worry," I pleaded.
Yeah, I never told Yin that Pack occasionally followed me around and tried to convince me of his feelings again and again because I didn't want him to overthink or worry. I didn't want to add to his burden, which he was already busy with his commitment to his football team and studies. Pack also never tried to approach me when Yin or my other friends were around and that's the first time he behaved like this in front of other friends.
"Are you kidding me? You know Yin will be more worried if you don't tell him," he said and we sat in the cafeteria while Off looked at me furrowing.
I scratched my non-itchy head."I will tell him later."
"As you should."
Our talk came to an end when my phone rang and I grinned when I saw Yin's name on the screen. "Yin calls me," I told Off and he made a sign that he wanted to go buy food. I nodded and answered the call.
"I miss youuu." That's the first words Yin said after I picked up the call, using his spoiled voice and my lips immediately turned into a smile again.
"Why did you call me so late? I'm waiting for your call," I pretended to sulk.
"I'm sorryyy."
"I fell asleep on the bus and we just arrived."
"Hmm okay."
"I miss youuu. What should I do now?" He said while pretending to cry.
"Yinnnn"
"I miss you too," I replied while smiling like a person who excitedly talked with his crush.
"I want hug you when I came-"
He stopped and I heard his coach's voice talking about something.
"I need to go now. I will call you tonight, okay?" He said in a hurry.
"I love you, my baby Warrr!"
"I love you too, Yin," I replied and he hung up the call.
I looked at my phone screen and sighed before slowly resting my head on the table. We were talking for not even two minute!!!
'Don't be so childish, War,' I reminded myself and Off came back to our table, then put a plate of shrimp fried rice in front of me. I raised my eyebrows while looking at him because I didn't ask him to buy that and I also didn't have an appetite to eat right now.
"You need to eat or Yin will smash my head," he said and sat in front of me.
I took out my wallet from my pocket and put the money on the table as the price for the shrimp fried rice he just bought but he pushed the money back towards me while feeding the fried noodles into his mouth.
"Yin already left me money to buy this for you," he said, making me furrowed.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"He asked me to buy breakfast, lunch and dinner for you when he isn't here."
I continued scowling as I looked at him.
"Don't look at me like that. He did that because he knows you always skip your meal."
"Especially when we are in the study week," Off said and I smiled a little while looking at the fried rice in front of me.
'He's really worried about me,' I monologued in my mind.
Yin is the only person who constantly reminds me to eat because I tend to skip meals, especially when I'm too preoccupied with my studies. He would always look for different ways to ensure that I would eat even a simple meal, even if I didn't want to and when he asked Off to look for me when he isn't here with me, I know he really cares and worries about me more than myself.
"Stop smiling and playing with your food, War."
"Eat that," Off said and I rolled my eyes while grinning, then ate the meal.
∘✧──────✧∘
The nights that usually feel joyful and upbeat feel lonely as I'm alone in my room without Yin sleeping down next to me. I sighed and rolled on the bed, waiting for Yin's call because he already told me he wanted to call me tonight but the clock had already struck 12.30 am and I had still not received a call from him.
Did he already fall asleep?
I wanted to call him but I'm worried if he was busy and I'm gonna bother him. Or maybe he was too tired and already fell asleep.
"I miss youuu!" I shouted in front of my phone screen.
I tossed my phone beside me and closed my eyes, trying to sleep but my intentions were thwarted when my phone rang and I was like lightning automatically opening my eyes and picking up my phone while smiling widely.
"Why you call me so-"
"Hello, pookie."
I frowned since it wasn't Yin's voice and I knew who the only person was who called me that way. I checked my phone again as I was too excited to answer the call earlier and not bother to look at the name. Instead of Yin as I had expected, it was Pack who had called me.
"Hello, War. Are you there?" Pack asked after I kept silent.
"Yeah. Why do you call me at this hour?"
"Awww, is Yin mad if I call you? Or he scared-"
"Pack, what do you want?"
"Let's have breakfast together tomorrow," he said cheerfully and I furrowed. This is the first time he has invited me to breakfast after knowing of my relationship with Yin, so I'm curious about his motives. I mean, I wouldn't have cared if my other friends had invited me but because it was him and I knew how he felt about me, I couldn't help but feel deeply uncomfortable.
After he purposely portrays Yin as a bad and nasty guy to James, my apprehensiveness and unpleasantness towards him increases. I had no issues rekindling my friendship with him but as time went on, I began to feel as if he had changed from the Pack that I knew.
"Hello War?"
"I can't," I replied briefly.
"It's just breakfast, War. Not more than that."
"I'm still your friend, aren't I?"
"I didn't plan to eat breakfast tomorrow."
"War, I really-"
"I need to go now. Bye," I said and ended the call without waiting for him to finish his words.
I let out a deep breath and checked my phone again if there's a call or message from Yin but I got nothing. In the end, I just slept without hearing his voice.
∘✧──────✧∘
The light from the window woke me up from sleep and as soon as I opened my eyes, I quickly reached for my phone, which I had left next to me to see if Yin had called or texted me while I was sleeping but nothing had changed. No news from him.
Was he really busy?
Or did he still sleep because he was too tired?
I made the decision to leave him a message, which I hope didn't disturb him.
"Are you busy, Yin? Please call me if you have time, even a minute. I miss you :( "
I sent the message to him and got off the bed lazily to take a shower. It's 8.30 am now and usually I would go to breakfast with Yin or before we were in a relationship, Yin would come to my room for us to have breakfast together.
Arghhh!!! I miss him so bad!!!
I lay down on the sofa and read my book as I didn't have a morning class today, so I didn't plan to have breakfast and I know Yin would be mad at me if he knew I skipped my meal again but I didn't have any energy to move my ass when he wasn't around!!! I should really be upset with him for spoiling me so much that I now need his frequent company.
Knock Knock Knock
Someone knocked on the door and I walked sluggishly to open it. It's still early and I didn't have any energy and mood to communicate with people yet.
"Good morning, pookie!" Pack greeted me and smiled broadly as soon as I opened the door, causing me to startled as I didn't expect he was the one who came.
"What are you doing here?" I questioned in a voice that was a strong indication that I didn't like his presence. It's not an issue if Bonz was coming but it's him.
"I bought you breakfast." He showed the plastic bag in his hand with a smile still on his face.
"Can we eat inside your room?"
"Eat inside his room your ass."
Someone responded before I had a chance to open my mouth and I looked at the direction of the voice and Off walked towards us while giving him a deadly glance.
"Are you not ashamed to bother someone's lover?"
Pack chuckled and pushed Off's shoulder who was standing in front of him."Then what are you doing here? You want him too?" He smirked and Off grinned back at him.
"His boyfriend is my best friend. So, he trusts me to look for his lovely boyfriend because he knows there's a son of a bitch who didn't know his place," Off replied and pushed Pack's shoulder back.
"Off," I called him as I didn't want him to have a fight with Pack and that's not good for both sides if they end up arguing.
"Take this." Off handed me the plastic with the meal and hot coffee inside which I eagerly accepted because I knew Yin who asked him to buy it as Off already told me yesterday.
"Lock your room. I'm scared if a dog tries to come in," he said in front of Pack's face.
Off then changed his glance at me as I still didn't move and looked at both of them, not knowing what to do."Why are you still standing here? Get inside."
"You want me to tell Yin?" He said and I immediately closed the door, leaving both of them outside.
I truly feel as though Yin places security on me and when Off threatens to inform Yin, I feel as though my blood and muscles are suddenly cut off even though I did nothing wrong. Maybe because I could imagine what it would look like if Yin was angry. I'm aware that he continues to be patient with Pack's behaviour, especially when Pack comes to my room and causes a ruckus and even punches him in the face but if his patience is strained, he may use more than one punch especially if he knows Pack kept bothering me.
∘✧──────✧∘
TWO DAYS LATER
Every minute, I checked my phone to see if Yin had called or left a message but I got nothing. He still hasn't replied to or even read the message I sent him every single day, telling him about my days and complaining to him I miss him like crazy. He promised to call me every day but it has been four days since he went to the camp and he just keeps quiet.
Is he too busy and not have a minute to message or call me?
Did he not miss me?
"I'm not allow you to hug me when you come back."
"I'm sulking with you."
I sent the messages to him while typing harshly and placed my head on the table, not having a mood to continue to study.
"He just goes for a week, not a year. Don't be so dramatic, Wanarat," Bonz grumbled while throwing a peanut to me and I mimicked his voice, then continued to behave like a zombie. Even to move my muscles I feel so lazy.
"You're really in love with him." Bonz chuckled looking at me and I immediately corrected my body posture, then rested my chin on my hand and smiled. "Of course," I replied shortly and continued to smile while remembering the memories of when he surprised me and asked me to be his boyfriend.
"Did you not feel awkward?" Bonz asked, making me raise my eyebrows as I didn't understand his question.
"I mean you were both best friends before this and then changed your status to become a lover. It must be awkward at first, isn't it?"
"I'm not," I replied confidently because I never feel awkward when we change our status from best friend to lover.
I'm sure that some people find the change from best friend to lover uncomfortable but I never feel that way because our interactions since high school have been more romantic than simply friendly. We were holding hands, stroking hair, pinching cheeks and we did a lot of physical touch that even a best friend would feel awkward to do, especially for their male best friend.
And maybe because I also feel very comfortable when he's around, so I never feel awkward since the first day we became lovers, instead I feel so freaking happy finally we both became honest to our feelings.
"War, did Pack bother you today?" Off interrupted my conversation with Bonz while pulling the chair to sit next to me.
"Pack still bother you?" Bonz asked as he also noticed Pack kept following me here and there these past few days when Yin wasn't around and thankfully, Off would always appear out of nowhere to help me in escaping Pack or stop Pack to keep following me.
"I don't see him today," I replied.
Off let out a sigh and stared at me. "Tell Yin when he comes back. He may misunderstand if he heard from someone else."
I merely hummed to it as my mind drifted away and I puzzled why Yin hadn't gotten in touch with me yet. He only called me a minute or two after arriving in Chiang Mai and then he vanished without a trace.
I will not allow him to touch me when he comes back!!!
∘✧──────✧∘
The only way I can cope with another lonely night without Yin next to me is to cuddle my pillow and pretend that he is there. Looking at my phone screen has now become a hobby for me but Yin's name hasn't shown up on my notifications over the last few days, Pack is the only name that consistently does. He continued to wish me a good morning and good night, which only added to my discomfort as I had already asked him to put a boundary between us.
If he wasn't a friend of mine or someone I used to be close to, I would have blocked him by now. I know that he was my ex-boyfriend and that we were together for about a year but our tale ended long ago and although I was with him before, I fully admit I always prioritize Yin more than him.
I took another long look at my phone before choosing to message Yin even though I knew he wouldn't reply.
"I'm tired today. I don't know if I'm tired of studying or missing you T_T "
"Can you call me if you have time?"
"I miss you, Yinnn"
After sending him a message, I kept looking at my phone in the desperate hope that he would reply but the call from my mom woke me up from my reverie.
"Hello, mom,"I answered the call.
"Hello, War. What are you doing, my baby?" My mom asked with her lovely voice as always.
"Just laying down on my bed."
"Why are you still not sleeping? It's late now."
"I miss you all of a sudden. When are you gonna come back? You didn't miss your parents, huh?" Mom said with a sullen tone and I chuckled before responding.
"I miss you, mommm."
"I'm gonna come back next week after the exam but...."
"I also bring someone with me," I told her while smiling from ear to ear as I already planned to bring Yin back to my house to meet my parents and of course to tell them about our relationship. They already know Yin as a friend that I was close to during high school but this time, I brought him not as a friend but as my boyfriend.
"Awww, who is the lucky person? You sound so happy right now," she teased me, making me grin.
"You will meet my lucky person later, mom."
We talked for a few minutes before my mom hung up the call as it's already late. After that, I kept checking my phone in the vain hope that Yin would respond to my chat but I received no response.
"I miss you so bad, Yinnn," I screamed as I rolled over onto my bed.
credit:ko_yinwar
5/7/2022