Cw: violence, suicide, mention of teacher-student relationship, pretty triggering ngl🫣 sorry for the angst I havent been feeling good so self projecting again💀 fluff in the next chapter tho so dw (for now) 😈
June 14th, 2006
9.13, pm.
You sighed, arranging all your items you had brought to the trip onto your bed. You were mentally exhausted and wanted nothing more than to sleep.
In your room.
You felt horribly home sick- and you missed your dad too.
You tried to ignore rika and camilia who was cackling about something on their phones- sitting on the bed that was thankfully not the one you were on at the moment.
Aria was showering- magically arriving at the hotel the same time you did. It was odd that she was even at that same beach anyways.
But you tried not to think much of it- not having the energy to do so anyways.
You froze in dread when you heard the two girls laugh at you- mentioning your name in a sentence.
You turned to them- looking literally exhausted.
Rika snorted, "are you seriously gonna let arias words get to you? You're so weak."
You clenched your jaw, hands stopping it's job from taking out all the things from your bag.
"You don't know the kinda things she says to me." You mumbled, way too fucked out of your mind and too vulnerable to even defend yourself. You wanted nothing more than to break down once again and cry.
But if you did, things would just spiral out of control again.
"What? That you're just some freak that fucks the math teacher? Or that you're a slut who fucked your sisters ex?" Rika smirked, folding her arms. Camilia didn't dare to say something harmful straight to your face- still intimidated.
You were too exhausted to even be angry right now. You suddenly felt your eyes sting and your nose get warm- an indication of you about to cry your heart out.
You could feel a sob crawling up your throat, a weak whimper that'd start your crying session all over again. You swallowed thickly, turning back to arranging your things on the bed.
"Too tired to bite back? That's not like you y/n... who even are you?" Rika was taunting you, her words stinging you like venom.
So it wasn't just you who thought you'd lost yourself? Others noticed it too?
You bit on your quivering bottom lip, looking at the two wet droplets that splatted on the material of your bag- darkening the colour of the beige white.
"Where's the angry girl who beat up the spoilt girl in your class?"
"JUST SHUT UP!" You felt a string snap in you- and the last thing you remembered seeing was camilias horrified face.
You felt your ears ringing and you instantly dropped to your knees from how loud and overwhelming everything was. Everything was black- you couldnt see anything or hear anything but the familiar whispering sounds.
You gasped once you snapped back into reality- greedily sucking in oxygen as you felt your throat swell and close up on you- making you panic since it was getting harder to breath each second.
You gripped onto your hair tightly, pulling on it and shaking your head to try and get the voice out.
To try and get her voice out.
You panted, eyes wide as you stared down on the carpeted floor that slowly came into vision. The whispers slowly quieted down as you stared down at the floor blankly, the grip on your hair loosening.
You suddenly heard a voice that was soft as a mumble- then you realized you couldn't hear properly when you turned to look at Camilia who looked to be raging- yelling at you.
Your eyes diverted to aria who had a towel wrapped around her hair, eyes wide and her lips in a sick smile.
Then you stared at rika.
Rika who was holding her head in pain. Her hand was dripping with blood as she panted, trying to calm herself down.
"You're fucking sick!" Camilia yelled, her eyes wide and her hands on rikas shoulder.
Your mouth was agape as you looked around- your vision blurry and shaky. You stood up, bolting out of the room after slamming it open.
You ran out the room, looking at the dull hallway infront of you.
The whispers managed to get back at you- spiralling out of control, dropping you onto your bruised knees painfully.
You couldn't care less about anyone seeing you at the moment- all you wanted and asked for was for everything to stop. For everyone to just stop.
When you heard the door behind you open, you forced yourself up, sprinting towards the emergency stairs.
You wanted the voice to all stop. You wanted everything to all stop.
You couldn't bare it anymore- couldn't bare the thought of having to live like this.
You heard footsteps stomping up the stairs with you- causing you to spring up faster even though you could barely even breath.
You slammed the rooftop door open, taking a big whiff of the fresh air.
Slowly, you walked towards the tall edge, looking down at the view.
You suddenly got why he did it.
You got why your bestfriend kill himself. It was such an insane thing to think about.
Your bestfriend killed himself. You saw it on the news, heard it everywhere but-
Your bestfriend took his own life. And you finally got yourself to think about it. To say that phrase in your head.
You finally got why he did it. You finally felt yourself slowly forgiving him for being selfish, for leaving you behind in this world.
He was just a child who couldn't take the pain anymore.
Just a fucking kid.
"You gonna go meet hanzo?" You could hear the smirk in arias voice.
With tears in your eyes, you looked behind. "You think I'm not gonna do it?" You raised your eyebrows, backing up further towards the edge where you back hit the wall like fence of it.
"Y-y/n?"
You frowned, "Emma??" You turned around, eyes widening when you realized literally half of your whole friend group were hanging out up on the roof.
A cute fucking group date and you had to ruin it.
Aria smirked, walking closer towards you. "Ah, so there are your sweet little friends. Wanna introduce me?" She stared at you from the corner of her eye.
Your mouth was agape and you realized they heard it.
They heard you, they heard about hanzo. The secret you wanted so badly to keep with you.
You remembered mikey occasionally asking you; "where's that guy you always hang around with?"
He finally got his answer.
Emma sat up uncomfortably, they all visibly tensed up from how close you were to the edge.
"T-this isn't what it looks like.." you let out a shaky breath, your head shaking. You internally cursed when you felt the tears stinging your eyes once more.
"Oh I'm sure it isn't. Why don't you do it? Do what you want. Go see hanzo. Go see your bestfriend."
"Shut the fuck up aria! The fuck is wrong with you?!" Baji stepped in, sitting up but chifuyu pulled him down in fear his bestfriend would lose it and get violent.
"Oh. Sorry, forgot you guys were friends with him too." Aria frowned mockingly, a sweet smile on her face.
"I'm sure you guys heard about your sweet depressed friend leaving japan then?" She folded her arms, eyeing you uncomfortably.
You stood frozen- too scared to move. To scared of what would happen next.
You psychically could not fucking move.
"That's pathetic, don't you think manjiro?" Aria smiled, walking up towards the group. Mikey furrowed his eyebrows- looking at her in pure disgust.
"The fuck happened to you? Get over yourself." He spat, genuinely shocked because this was his first time seeing your sister like this.
"What happened to me? Weren't we best friends mikey? Does y/n know you actually visited me when our parents divorced or are you keeping her under control with a lie like rindou is?"
Your head was spinning as you felt that be your last straw. Everything was crashing and falling apart and there wasn't anything you could do about it.
Hina stood up violently, pushing aria- making her fall back slightly. The others were too flabbergasted from the monster aria became.
"You're fucking sick.." Emma mumbled, her face mirroring everyone else's.
Aria turned to you with a crooked smile, "Well? How you feelin y/n? How does it feel to be saved? How does it feel to finally be the damsel in distress?" Her words were taunting but you knew they held a deeper meaning than that.
"How does it feel? Yeah! I'm the fucking bad person, I'm always the fucking villain in everything!" Aria laughed sarcastically, looking at you, then her childhood fiends.
Your mouth parted, you were truly speechless. You couldn't believe your own sister.
"I'll play the villain if that's what makes you feel better about yourself- considering the fact you literally gave rika a concussion by throwing your phone at her. Good job." She clasped her hands together, clapping lightly.
"You're getting a bit too ahead of yourself y/n. You're me. My clone. You're arias little sister- nothing less, nothing more. You're just my shadow so keep lurking in there yeah?" She finished off her sentence with a lazy smile, making her way to the door and leaving with a huge slam behind her.
You stood limp, shocked at her fucked up state.
Mikey ran over to you, asking the others to stay where they were since he knew you hated when too many people were with you when you were vulnerable. You'd also get overwhelmed when people crowded around you at times like these.
Before mikey could say anything, you turned to him- giving him a smile similar to arias.
"Don't hate her too much. She's just ill." And with that, you walked away, closing the rooftop door behind you.
As soon as you stepped down the first flight of staircase- you broke down once again.
You sat down on one of the stairs, hiding your face in your hands as you shook your head in denial- wiping your tears with your wrists.
There was no way life was gonna be this bad. There was no way you'd have no escape.
There was no way rindous love for you wasn't real.