Derek was going to be back soon. She was sitting in their bed, she was pretty sure that at this point it was categorized as their bed because she was in it all the time. And she was waiting for him because he had seemed like he had been in a perfectly good mood when he had left to take Grace for a walk. But she was pretty sure he wasn't supposed to be in a good mood today.
It had been three years since the accident. She had been thinking about it, but hadn't wanted to say anything to him. They were happy. They were really happy, and she didn't want to ruin it. She realized this made her selfish, but she liked happy Derek. She loved the Derek who played with Gracie and tickled her during movies and looked at her like she was amazing and...something special. And she was pretty sure he must have remembered. His wife had died. And more importantly, Sarah had died. There was no way he would forget about that, even if he seemed completely happy. He had to know what today was and he was probably just doing what she was doing, trying to be happy because it was really nice to be happy. He knew what today was.
Which meant the thing she really wanted to happen, the thing that had gotten interrupted yesterday, well, that was probably not going to happen. She had figured after his mom had left, they would get back to the sex but...he had made dinner and cuddled with her instead, his arms wrapped tightly around her while Grace rested on his legs. And she did want to have sex with him. Badly. But having sex with him today felt...wrong or something. Or not wrong but wanting to have sex with him...that was probably wrong. Even if he was doing okay today, sex would probably be too much for him. Which was okay. Tomorrow would be a different day so she could wait and she got it. She was just happy that he was breathing and living like normal. He had gone to work and had a good day. And now he was walking the dog and when he got home they could watch a movie or something.
She turned the page to her book and tried to ignore the need that basically lived in her all the time. Derek was great in bed. She remembered that. He was great in bed and the way he had been looking at her lately...she was pretty sure he was thinking really dirty thoughts. He had basically had a constant hardon, but she wasn't going to think about that. She wasn't going to think about sex.
"We're back," Derek's voice interrupted her thoughts as the door swung open and Grace ran in.
"Hey," she smiled widely at him, watching as Grace drank eagerly at her water bowl. "Good walk?"
"Very," he grinned. "Though some squirrels may never be the same again."
"She was chasing squirrels?"
"She was," he smiled proudly.
"And Mark called her a coward," she giggled.
"Show how little Mark knows."
"Definitely," she smiled, putting her book down to lift Grace up on the bed. "You didn't hurt any squirrels did you, Gracie?"
"She's not quite that brave."
"Well, that's good. The last thing we need is her dragging in dead animals."
"One of the squirrels stopped and looked back at her. Grace whined loudly and ran behind my legs."
"Poor Gracie," Meredith giggled, rubbing Grace's belly.
"I don't think she'll ever be as brave as the other dogs," he laughed softly.
"I think she will. She just...she's getting braver."
"She is."
"She'll be running after squirrels and...raccoons or whatever soon."
"Raccoons?"
"There are raccoons in the woods."
"Yes but they're bigger than her."
"They won't always be bigger than her."
"I know that," he rolled his eyes.
"So she'll chase them," she giggled as Gracie rolled onto her back, kicking her tiny legs in the air.
"She will," he sighed, smiling softly at her.
"You don't want her to get bigger?" Meredith murmured, rubbing the puppy's stomach again.
"She's kind of cute so tiny."
"Kind of cute?"
"Really cute."
"That's what we thought, Daddy," Meredith giggled, though it died the second she said daddy. That probably wasn't a word he wanted to hear today.
"Of course," Derek laughed, falling onto the bed beside her.
"Hey," she murmured, running her fingers through his hair.
"Hey," he smiled softly, his eyes sparkling.
"How...how was your day?"
"Good," he grinned. "Yours?"
"It was good," she nodded, reaching to pet Gracie who stood up on the bed for a second.
"Hmmm...good," he breathed, reaching out to run his hand along her arm.
"Do you..." she trailed off and watched Gracie turn around three times, obviously looking for a good place to lie down.
"Hmmm?"
"Do you want to watch a movie?"
"No."
"Oh," she breathed.
"We can put one on," he smirked. "But don't expect to pay attention."
"Why not?"
"Because I have other plans."
"Other plans?" she breathed.
"Hmmm..." he nodded slowly.
"Are we...are we playing with Gracie?"
"No."
"Oh," she nodded, watching the dog who was curled up next to Derek, watching him carefully.
"We got interrupted yesterday."
"We did."
"I want you," he whispered.
"Oh," she breathed, her body automatically heating. "I...I want you too."
"Good."
"Good," she nodded.
"So..." he breathed.
"So..."
"Hmmm..." he smiled, leaning over to kiss her gently.
"Hi," Meredith murmured against his lips, her hands moving through his curls. "I think Gracie needs to go to bed."
"I think that's a good idea," he nodded, looking at the dog.
"Gracie, bed time," she giggled, scratching the puppy's belly.
"That's not going to help," Derek laughed.
"Well, you take her."
"Oh make me be that bad guy," he smiled, reaching for the dog. "Grace, we love you but you need to go to bed so we can have some...grown up time."
"Grown up people time."
"Yes," he nodded, shifting to put Grace in her bed. "So can you stay here for a bit?"
"You need to teach her to stay, Der," Meredith grinned, her heart pounding. They were going to do this. They were actually going to do this.
"Well I'd take her to obedience school but I think that would scare her."
"We can teach her ourselves," she rolled her eyes.
"We can," he nodded, looking carefully at Grace. "You're good?"
"She's good, Der."
"Good," he grinned, shifting back onto the bed, moving so he was laying on top of her. "Where were we?"
"We...we were naked," she breathed.
"Oh yes," he smiled. "There seems to be a problem."
"We're clothed?" she raised an eyebrow.
"Yes."
"We should fix that."
"We should," he nodded, his hands going to the bottom of her shirt.
"Derek?" she whispered, her hands finding his, squeezing them tightly.
"Hmmm?"
"You...you haven't been drinking, have you?'
"What? Of course not," he frowned. "What kind of question is that?"
"I just...this isn't going to be a mistake or...because I love you. I really, really love and I just need to know that...I need to know you're not drunk and you're doing this because...because you want to."
"Because of what today is?" he whispered.
"I...yeah."
"Hmmmm..." he breathed. "It hurts, I'm not going to lie. There's...today hurts more than most. But I love you. And I want this, I want you. I desperately want you."
"Because...not because you want to forget or..."
"No," he shook his head. "It's been three years."
"I'll get it if you don't want to. I don't...I'll get it, Derek."
"Mer, I want to. I love you."
"Okay," she breathed.
"This...this is my life now and I want to make love to you."
"Okay," she murmured, leaning forward to kiss him softly.
"I love you," he murmured, looking down at her. "I love you."
"I love you too."
"Hmmm..." he breathed, kissing her gently as he pulled her shirt up. "Naked..."
"Naked," she giggled, lifting her arms above his head as he pushed her shirt off, his lips falling to her breasts. His tongue trailed over the edges of her bra, his eyes already dark but...worshipping. Or something. She couldn't even describe the careful way he was touching her.
"Oh Mer..." he breathed, his hands moving around to her back as he continued to press soft kisses along her upper chest. His hands moving skillfully belong her back, the roughness playing gently against her smooth skin. She loved his hands. His hands moved again, snapping open her bra, one hand moving back to her front to pull it off her. "So damn beautiful."
"Thank...thank you," she murmured, watching as his eyes darkened, but lit up at the same time. It sounded definitely weird, but that's what they did. He stared at her for a moment and then ran his hands gently over her breasts, cupping them in his hands. An admiring noise escaped from deep within his throat and he leaned forward, kissing her softly as his fingers played along her breasts.
"Mer..." he whispered, his voice sending shivers down her back. It wasn't his usual voice. It was low and desperate and something she hadn't heard before and it made her entire body tremble with need.
"Derek," she breathed breathlessly, reaching to take off his t-shirt and then letting her fingers fall to his fly.
"I love you," he murmured. "I love you."
"I love you too," she nodded, pushing his pants down quickly. "You...no answering cell phones."
"Definitely not," he laughed, sounding completely breathless.
"I need you inside me."
"I need to be inside you," he breathed, pulling her own pants down.
"Please..."
"Getting there," he laughed, pressing some kisses on her shoulder.
"Getting...getting there?"
"Yes."
"Why not now?" she giggled, rocking her hips up to meet his erection.
"Not begging enough," he smirked.
"You want me to beg?"
"Not beg just...be desperate," he breathed. "It's called foreplay, Mer."
"I'm tired of foreplay," she giggled, moving quickly so that he was on his back.
"Oh," he gasped, his eyes going wide.
"We've had a lot of foreplay," she breathed, kissing him deeply.
"We did..."
"I want sex," she breathed, centering herself over him.
"Okay."
"Okay?" she raised an eyebrow.
"I...I want sex too..." he breathed.
"You're sure?" she teased, brushing her folds over his hard cock.
"Yes," he gasped.
"Yes?"
"Please."
"Please," she whispered, leaning forward to nibble on his ear just as she took him into her. "Oh."
"Oh," he gasped loudly, his arms flying around her to hold her tightly against him. "Mer..."
"Don't...don't move," she gasped, tightening her muscles around him. Warmth spread throughout her body, her head already feeling light. "Don't move."
"No," he shook his head. "No moving."
"Please," she pleaded quietly, falling against him, her head resting on his shoulder as she held him tightly inside her.
"I love you," he whispered. "God, I love you."
"I love you too," she breathed into his shoulder.
"Hmmm..." he breathed. "Mer..."
"I...I don't want...don't move yet," she pleaded quietly as he turned her over onto her back gently, staying inside her. He ran his hands delicately up and down her back, pressing small kisses to her shoulders and neck as she lay against him, fighting off the dizziness and her pounding heart.
"We don't have to."
"Okay."
"You feel amazing," he whispered.
"I...I'm not supposed to say thank you, am I?" she giggled breathlessly as she kissed him.
"You can," he whispered.
"Thank you," she breathed. "You...I love you."
"I...I love you too."
"Good," she murmured as he ran his hands over her skin.
"Can I...slow?"
"Yeah...yeah..." she whispered, carefully releasing him.
"Good," he breathed, pushing a little deeper into her.
"Oh...Derek..."
"Mer...." he whispered, pulling slowly out of her. "Oh..."
"Are you..." she trailed off as he scooted down to kiss her abdomen, moving his lips down over her hips. "Derek?"
"Hmmm?"
"We...sex...please..."
"Mer, this, this is sex," he laughed, sounding strangled as he pushed slowly back into her.
"I know," she giggled. "But...it's...I've never had sex like...like this."
"That's...I'm better than the others."
"Oh, of course."
"I am," he murmured, thrusting gently and softly.
"Oh...oh god..." she purred.
"Hmmm..." he groaned, his hands moving up and down her body slowly as he moved slowly over her.
"I...I love you," she whispered as her eyes fluttered shut. With every thrust, he buried himself deeper into her, and already, she could feel her body tingling. He had been good. The night at Joe's, he had definitely been good. But this was...it was bigger. A lot bigger. Ten times bigger. And she loved him. She completely loved him and...this. She loved this. Really loved his rough hands over her body.
"I love you too," he murmured, his one hand moving off her waist to run his fingers gently through her hair, kissing her gently. She wasn't actually sure she had ever been kissed this gently during sex. But it was good, it was really good and nice.
"Derek?" she breathed, tightening her muscles to hold him deep within her.
"Hmmm?"
"Are...are you happy?" she whispered, opening her eyes to stare into his dark, lust-filled ones.
"W...what?"
"Are you happy?"
"Oh," he breathed. "Yeah."
"Okay," she murmured.
"Are you?"
"Yeah," she breathed. "Really...really...happy."
"Good," he smiled. "So am I."
"Good," she smiled, her hands moving to his hair and pulling his head down to her lips again as she released him to thrust up into her.
"Hmmm..." he groaned, deepening the kiss and moving his hips a little harder into her, thrusting again a little more quickly.
"Yes...yes..." she gasped quietly, her brain going blissfully blank the harder he thrust into her.
"Mer...Mer..." he murmured, his body trembling over hers as he moved in and out at a much steadier rhythm, his tongue dancing with hers.
"Oh fuck...god..." Meredith breathed, squeezing him tightly with her muscles as her legs went around his back, giving him better access to the very depths of her. He moaned happily at the sudden ease with which he slipped into her, and she hugged him close to her with her legs, both of them kissing each other desperately. Her chest began to burn and her thighs shake as Derek ducked a hand down to tap against her clit.
"Oh," he grunted slightly, his thrusts picking up pace as he ran his finger along her clit. He was trembling above her, grunting and moaning with every thrust as he moved over her.
"Derek...I'm..." she pulled away from him, taking a heaving breath before grabbing his head again to kiss him as her orgasm built, waiting for Derek to push her completely over the edge. "Der...Der..."
"Mer..." he whimpered against her lips, his body trembling harder as he thrusted hard into her, his movements becoming quick and losing rhythm as his own body begged for release.
"Oh...oh....fuck, Derek!" she screamed into his mouth as her chest seemed to explode just as a powerful thrust pushed over the edge. "Derek..."
"Mer...Mer..." he gasped, his body shaking as he started pushing hard and fast into her and her entire body spasmed around him.
"Come...you...let...god!" she screamed, pulling back as she tried to catch her breath, only to find herself kissing him again as he thrust hard into her and then arched his back, grunting hard.
"Meredith!" he shouted, his body trembling hard as he emptied into her before collapsing onto her.
Her body was still trembling as he gasped and heaved into her neck, his back sweaty as he ran his hand over it. Meredith's head swam, and she could still feel herself spasming ever so slightly around his flaccid penis. Sex. They had...that had been sex. Really, really good sex. Amazing sex. She looked down at him and pressed a kiss to his sweaty curls, her heart pounding.
"Hmmm..." he groaned, shifting to slip out of her. "Love..."
"Love?" she gasped.
"You."
"Oh," she giggled breathlessly. "Yeah. You...you too."
"Good," he whispered.
"That...that..."
"Amazing?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah."
"Can't...can't breathe."
"Oh," he frowned, rolling off her. "Sorry."
"It's okay," she giggled.
"Hmmm..." he breathed, pulling her close to him.
"I love you," she whispered into the pillow as his left hand rubbed her thigh, his nose buried against the back of her neck.
"I love you too," he murmured.
"Hmmm," she breathed, opening her eyes slowly and giggling when she saw Grace standing on her hind legs, her paws on the mattress.
"What?"
"Grace wants up now."
"Oh," Derek laughed looking at her. "Come here, Grace."
Grace barked eagerly, and tried to hop onto the bed, her tiny legs losing the battle. "Poor Gracie," Meredith smiled, reaching for the puppy and bringing her onto the bed.
"I think we kept her awake," Derek grinned.
"Sorry, Gracie. We'll be more quiet next time."
"That's not actually true," Derek laughed.
"No it isn't," Meredith giggled, rubbing Gracie's stomach as she turned to look at Derek.
"What?"
"Nothing," she shrugged, smiling widely as Gracie kicked her feet in the air.
"You're staring at me."
"I'm looking at you."
"You're staring."
"Staring is stalkerish."
"Than you're stalkerish."
"I am not!" she giggled, smacking his bicep as she yawned.
"You are," he smiled. "And tired."
"Tired," she murmured, turning onto her side and smiling when he wrapped his arms around her.
"Get some sleep."
"You too," she ordered softly, squeezing his hand.
"I will," he murmured. "Mer?"
"Yeah?"
"I forgot. Until Mom reminded me yesterday, I had forgotten."
"Oh," she breathed, running her fingernails carefully over the hair on his arms.
"I'm okay. I know it's...it's moving on. I just...I wanted you to know."
"Okay."
"I love you."
"I love you too," she breathed.
"I'm okay, Mer. Stop worrying."
"I'm not worrying," she whispered. "Too...too hazy to worry."
"Oh," he laughed, kissing her neck softly. "Sleep."
"Sleep," she echoed, giggling as Gracie stood up and turned three times before stretching out across Derek's legs. Derek's arms tightened around her and she let out a deep contented sigh. Safe. Everything was stopping and she...she felt safe. Really and completely safe after amazing sex. But the sex wasn't the point. For the first time in her life, sex wasn't the point.