"Chloe" his hand reaches for my face and my first instinct is to pull away, for the third time but I know if I make it a fourth the directors may start thinking about firing me.
Cameron's hand runs along my face and I close my eyes, remembering his soft, but firm touch. "I can't, it's to risky" I say, opening my eyes.
Cameron retracts his hand and I watch as he slides it back into his jean jacket. I am forced to frown at the lack of his skin touching mine.
"That's enough for tonight" The director yells and I sigh with relief. I jump off of the bed we were sitting on and start to walk downstairs and towards my trailer.
It's dark by the time I get outside. The street we are filming on is so peaceful and satisfying. The air is cool but just enough for a light sweater. I step inside of my trailer and change out of my dress and heels, exchanging it for leggings and Jacks grey hoodie. Grabbing my bag and turning off the lights, I open the door and nearly fall back in as Cameron stands outside of it.
He has on black jeans and a grey hoodie, much like the one I'm wearing.
"Yes?" I raise an eyebrow and slowly close the trailer door behind me. "I heard about Jack" Cameron blurts and I look up.
He watches me closely. "From who?" I question. "Nate" he nods and finally breaks his stare.
"Nate?" I lower my voice as I question him. "Yeah" Cameron stretches his back out and places a hand on his neck.
"We've been talking a lot lately"
I furrow my eyebrows together, not knowing what to say. "Well" I start. "I guess I will see you later" I wave and start to walk towards my car. The car Cameron bought me.
"Bye Alexia" Cameron voice echoes down the street. I turn around to see him awkwardly waving. I wave back with ease, but a smile still manages to creep on to my face.
As I walk back towards my car something feels off. It's more emotional. As I sit back in my seat I smile. I'm not left questioning why. I know why.
It feels like I've rewinded back to a year ago. When Cameron and I first met in that bar. But things feel different this time..
"I'm home" I call out to Nate as I step inside. "I don't care" Nate jokes as he comes into view.
The whole ride home I was trying to come up with ways to ask if Nate and Cameron do in fact talk... And why.
"Nate?"
He looks down at me and knits his eyebrows together. "Yes?"
I take a deep breath in. "Do you and Cameron talk?"
Nate bites in his bottom lip closes his eyes. "Yeah, but if that's a problem I ca-"
"No, it's not, don't worry" I give him a warm smile. "Where are you going anyway?" I question as he puts on his shoes and stands up. "Just out with a friend"
It's been a couple of hours since Nate left and I managed to find his stash. I pull out the large bottle of grey goose and start to rip off the lid. I take out a large glass and than some lemon aid from the fridge.
"Might as well" I say to myself as I dilute the vodka.
The sour liquid pours down my throat and with each sip, I start to feel less worried about Jack.
I hear my stomach grumble as I swig some more vodka back. That's when I decide to find the Cookie Dough Ben and Jerry's I hid in the freezer.
The thing I like most about vodka is your thoughts seem to just vanish. Your only focused on petty things. Like the amount of calories I just swallowed.
Frantically, I spin the container around and my eye balls nearly fall out of their sockets. There's nearly 2000 calories in this thing. And I just ate it all.
Tears being rolling down my face on instinct. Maybe I should go for a Jog to work it off. I agree on that but the minute I stand up, my knees collapse and I end up on the floor again.
It's funny, you never really realize how intoxicated you are until standing up. So instead of doing anything really, I lay back, place my arms at my sides and stare at the ceiling.
I wonder what it feels like to be in a coma. Does it just feel like your dreaming? Or can you hear everything that's going on around you but can't function to make a responses?
Questions that I will probably only find out if Jack decided to wake up. I want him to, I really want him to. But it's also soothing right now, without him knowing that I'll have to be getting intimate with Cameron on a movie set.
I wake up in one big jump, realizing that I feel asleep on the floor. "Shit" I say to myself as I look over at the time in the cable box. 3:30 am?
Is Nate not home yet? Or maybe he is. No, he wouldn't just leave me on the floor. Wait, I really don't know that for sure.
In sensing that the alcohol is still running through my veins so I wearily stand to my feet and make it up to the bedroom that Jack and I sleep together in. My head hits the pillow and suddenly, I am reminded why I love drinking so much..
7:30 am.
At least that's what my alarm clock tells me. I rub my eyes before sitting up, than wishing I hadn't. My hangover is in a mild stage.
I tread over to the bathroom where I look at myself in the reflection and shiver. My hair looks like a bird's nest and my makeup is smeared across my face.
Without even questioning it, I jump into the shower and clean myself off. I have to be on set by Eleven today. I think we only have about a week left of shooting if I'm not mistaken.
I dry my hair and throw on some light brown Kakis and a grey tee shirt.
I know Nate is awake because I hear a plate brake downstairs. Putting on my espadrilles I run down to ask him how his night was. I take it step by step and when I reach the bottom and turn into the kitchen I see Nate and the back of another male. He wears a grey hoodie and and black jeans.
"Hey" Nate smiles as he sits down at the table. I smile back and make my way over to the fridge. The unknown boy stands behind the fridge door as I open it and look around for something good to eat. I grab some watermelon slices and close the fridge.
Cameron stands behind the door just as I close it. He smiles shyly no bites down on his bottom lip. "Oh yeah, Alexia, meet Cameron" Nate snorts.
"Shut up" I roll my eyes at him but look back at Cameron. "What are you doing here?" I question but his face turns red. "I went out with Nate last night and he said I could crash here, I'll leave if-" I shake my head, cutting him off.
"It's fine" I say, noticing his level of embarrassment. It's off putting seeing him like this. It's just not Cameron. It's like a switch has been flicked inside of him.
My mind races to other possibilities and when I land on a certain one, I choke. What if Cameron has fallen in love, with someone else.
I look up at Cameron who seems to be staring at me already, probably wondering why I just choked. I look at his soft, plump lips and picture someone else slightly touching them with their own.
Or someone else running their fingers through his hair. Or just the simple thought of someone changing Cameron's whole attitude and perspective of life, just because of the love I could never give him.
I feel like breaking down. The thought of all this has definitely taken its toll and I don't know if I can stay stable until I run off to a secluded room.
"Alexia, are you alright?" Nate now seems to be standing behind me. I look over Cameron's shoulder and see the shimmering bottle in the cabinet. The soothing medicine that seems to be the only thing keeping me sane.
I try to maintain composure. "Can you two go grab my asthma inhaler from the bathroom upstairs?" I say and without any doubt, they both go up and search.
Quickly, I walk over and open the cabinet door, taking the bottle into my hand. I start to hear them talk so without even I glass, I start chug un healthy amounts. My throat starts to burn so I stop, taking a few coughs.
Footsteps are heard near the stairs and I race to put the bottle back in its spot and retrace my steps back to the counter where my watermelon lies.
"We couldn't find an asthma inhaler" Nate says as he looks in my eyes for signs of anything serious.
"Yeah, I think I left in it my car, but I'm alright now, thanks" I smile assuring them both everything is fine.
Cameron seems to be eyeing my every move. It's almost like he knows what I did.
"Anyways" I walk over and grab my keys off the counter. "I think I'm going to head out" I smile at them both but Cameron jumps out of his seat. His quick, tanned hands snatch the keys away from me and looks down. "I'll drive you" he pushes.
"No, I'm fine" I smile sarcastically and try to reach for them but instead, Cameron raises then over his head and leans in close.
His eyes locking with mine.
"You're not fine" He whispers. Nate decides to butt in. "You two are going to the same place anyways, drive less, save the planet" I look over and see him laugh to himself.
"Fine" I sigh and watch as Cameron slides my keys into his back pocket and get his shoes on. "I'll see you later" he waves to Nate.
We both walk in silence through the hall and out the door. But the minute sunlight is exposed, the wind also decides the make an appearance and I string, noticeable chill runs through me.
"I have a sweater for you" Cameron assures me as he brushes by and gets into the front seat of his black car. "I'm fine, it's not even that cold" I say getting into the passenger seat.
Everything feels so familiar in here. The smell, the way the leather seats feel and the driver.. My heart decides to stop once again as I remember my assumption of Cameron being in love. I wonder what she looks like.
Maybe she's blonde? Like me. Does Cameron have a type?
"How about you quit lying to me" he frowns as the engine starts. I look over with confusion.
Cameron reaches into the back seat and throws me a black hoodie and I don't waste time throwing it on. I'm not going to lie there, it was cold.
"You don't have asthma either" he leans in and sighs. "I could" I huff but he shakes his head.
"Let's stop with the lying"
I don't respond. The two of us sit quietly until we make it on set and part out ways there.
I have yet to see him today. Cameron was working on individual scenes, as was I.
I was praying to God that he forgot about driving me, so I would just be able to call a cab.
Just as I reach for my phone, a knock at my door startles me. I walk over and there is no surprise when I see Cameron standing out front.
He has on the same pair of black jeans and grey hoodie.
"Coming?" He raises an eyebrow. I turn the lights out and carefully follow him without any negotiations, I know they will fail.
The both is us are now safely in his car and on route home.
Cameron picks up his phone. "Shit" he says. I don't bother asking what's wrong. "Nate said you forgot your keys and he won't be home till tomorrow" Cameron turns to look at me but I seem to be frozen.
How could I be so stupid? And where the hell is Nate going that he had to take all night?
"I will-" I stop realizing I have no friends. Maybe Lindsay, never mind she's in New York.
"Take me to a hotel" I shrug my shoulders and look back out the window. That's the least he could do.
"Don't be fucking ridiculous" I hear Cameron scuff and I smile, that's the Cameron I know.
"Where are you taking me?" I question, seeing we've made a sharp turn. "You can stay at my place" he insists but I spin around as quick as lightening.
"Not happening" I flail. "Alexia you have no where else to go"
The car pulls into the familiar driveway. "I can stay at a hotel, I just can't stay here" I turn around at look at the house that used to be ours.
I can sense Cameron's fury, but he turns to face me, and most definitely shocks me.
"Alexia, I respect whoever decision you chose, but there is an empty bed inside and I will not pressure you, or make you feel like you need to do anything. This is just a friend, helping out another friend"
He unlocks the door and steps outside, walking on until he reaches his house and disappears.
"What the fuck" I whisper to myself. This must be some freaking girl.
I get out of the car and start to jog towards his house. Without knocking, I walk in and he stands right before me. He looks just as distressed as I.
I had only one intention as I walked inside. "Who is she?"