Luke
I've decided to go talk to Nancy. I'm not a complete idiot. After our last encounter I know the girl doesn't wanna talk to me – but I also know that she's just hurt right now, and that is my fault. And if it's my fault, I'm the one that needs to fix it. I don't want to be that guy that doesn't care anymore. Not with Nancy. I'm the one who can make her happy again. I know I can. I know that if I just get her alone, I can make it right. She won't be able to resist me if I turn on the charm and show her my pretty boy smile, as H calls it, and I really want to make it up to her. It's been too long since that night when she undressed for me and seduced me. Once again, I'm not an idiot, I know she was on a mission that night and boy did she succeed. I don't remember any other time when sex felt like that. It was desperate need, passion, wet sweaty heat and totally inevitable. Man, I wanna have that again and feel her tight wet walls clenching around me draining me dry. But that is not the main reason why I wanna talk to her. What I actually want is to tell her the real reason I can't be in an actual relationship with her and be her boyfriend. Why she shouldn't want me as her boyfriend. I want to tell her how I took Vanessa for granted, how I constantly neglected her, used her for sex and vague senses of intimacy never fully opening up or bearing myself and my vulnerability to her, and how I eventually pushed her away and into the arms of somebody else only to realize my mistake when it was too late. And I want to tell her that I'm afraid that I'll always do that, how that's what my dad does to my mom. I don't believe in curses, but I wouldn't be surprised if my great-great-great-great-granddad once tried to pull that trick with a witch who then cursed all of his male heirs into doing the same and never finding true happiness with anyone. But how in the world do I tell her that?
"Hey Pretty Face, are we leaving or what?" Hadrien says interrupting my gloomy thoughts as he enters the kitchen where I have been lost in thoughts looking out the window for the last 5 minutes.
"I'm leaving. You do you."
"Na dude, I'm coming with you. I'll take Angie for a romantic walk or something while you seduce the roommate."
"What? No, don't come, man! I gotta do this right. I gotta do this on my own."
"Sure."
"I mean it H! You're not coming. I don't need you with me on this one."
"Yeah ya' do. I'll just swoop Angie off her feet, and we'll be gone! You won't even notice. Leaving you alone with Nancy to do dirty things without an audience. Unless you like that whole voyeur-thing. I'm sure Angie and I will be highly entertained. We might even join in if you're willing to share." I know he's just joking, and the idea of a foursome should sound enticing, but the idea of Hadrien touching Nancy makes my blood boil.
"H, come on! I'm not going there to get down and dirty with Nancy." Although I wouldn't mind that one bit actually. But without Hadrien and Angie anywhere in the near fucking vicinity.
"Well..." Hadrien begins obviously building up to another inappropriate joke at my expense.
"You're not coming"
"Neither are you by the sounds of it." He laughs as he nudges my shoulder. "Come on, I'll work as a distraction, so you won't have to feel the wrath of two angry women at once. Taking on Nancy is scary enough without Angie chiming in." He says ushering me towards the front door, and before I know it, we're in his car on our way to the dorms. The stereo's playing some ancient-sounding pop in a language I believe is German. My man H is so pretentious. We get it, you study music Beethoven, get over it.
"What are we listening to? Your grandpa's old wank collection?" I ask sarcastically.
"No, it's Zarah Leander. It's from the thirties. It's beautiful, isn't it?" he smiles, fully aware that it's just old. Old is not automatically better or more intellectual.
"Is she German?" I ask not to look like a complete moron.
"No, she's Swedish actually. But Nazi-Germany loved her."
"So, she's a Nazi?!"
"No, Luke. She was a pop-singer and an actress. She sings about losing her lover, just like everybody else still do."
"Yeah, her Nazi-lover," I murmur. Hadrien chuckles.
***
At the dorm he lets me lead the way. As I knock at Nancy's door I hear voices, and I'm kinda happy that Hadrien is with me. I don't feel too comfortable around Angie, and I do need to be alone with Nancy.
"You bought her a rose?" Hadrien whispers. "Good move. I should have brought Angie something too."
I'm about to answer him when Nancy opens the door. Seeing her brings an automatic smile to my face. I don't even notice if anyone else is in the room.
"What are you doing here?" she asks. She doesn't exactly sound mad at me, but she's not thrilled to see me either. I hand her the rose. She takes it, and she obviously tries not to look at it or react to me bringing her flowers.
"I want to talk to you," I tell her, but instantly correct myself. "No, I need to talk to you. Come on Nancy, please talk to me." I add the last plea, because she looks like she's about to slam the door in my face. We look at each other for a second, before she throws the rose inside the room like she couldn't care less about it. Or me. Ouch! This is gonna hurt.
"Okay, but only for a minute," she says and takes a step towards me gesturing that we have to talk in the hallway. We take a few steps away from her room, leaving it up to Hadrien to kidnap Angie.
"You look great," I tell Nancy. I mean, she looks tired but hell if I'm gonna tell her that. But she looks better than the last time I saw her. Last time she looked distressed with red eyes and a sad face. Don't get me wrong, she still looked, and looks beautiful, but it's like something has left her. She has lost some of her warmth and sweetness. I know that's my doing, and I really don't like that. All of the things I wanted to talk to her about go out the window. Now I just wanna make her smile.
"Okay. What did you wanna tell me?" She looks impatient, and I've never seen her so cold before. It kinda throws me off my game for a second.
"I wanted to tell you how sorry I am, and I wanna make it up to you."
"I'm sorry too." She looks at the floor for a while, before her big blue eyes meet mine. "Listen, I really don't wanna talk about this. Can we just forget it?"
Wait, was it that easy?! I smile at her, and I'm about to pull her in for a hug when I see someone coming towards us.
"Nate?!"
"Hey man! Hi Nancy, is Angie in?"
"Eh, yeah..."
We both look at Nate. His eyes are red, and he looks desperate for an escape. I guess it didn't go as planned with Charlotte earlier. Nate stands in the doorway with Hadrien for a moment, but then they both turn around and come towards us.
"We're going to Moments," Hadrien declares, speaking through his teeth.
"Okay," I say and reach for Nancy's hand.
"I really should be getting back to the girls," Nancy says as she shies away from me.
"No, let's... let's hang out. Let's talk. I missed talking to you." God, I wanna grab her and lift her up and kiss her. I want to feel her legs around my waist and hear her giggle as I grab her beautiful ass.
"No Luke. I didn't mean 'forgive and forget and let's make out like nothing ever happened.' I just meant I don't wanna talk about what happened. It's painful for me to even see you, even more talk to you. So, no. Just no." And then she turns her back to me and slams the door behind her. What the hell?!
"Guys, I'm coming with you," I tell Nate and Hadrien. "Let's get wasted!"
Kacie
I'm working when Angie calls me. Or to be precise, I'm at work. I'm not actually working. As my phone rings, I'm sitting on Dean's desk, legs spread wide, and his face buried between my thighs. Dean has been quite possessive the last few months, and my reaction is to be more and more casual and indifferent. I guess that's why I decide to answer the call.
"Hi Angie," I say and let out a sigh because Dean pauses to look at me. I wink at him silently mouthing the word continue.
"Hi Kace. We're having a... girls party? A girls party at my place."
"Okay," I laugh at her, because even saying the words is awkward for her. "Who are the girls?"
"Well, it's Nancy who just told Luke to fuck off, me who just told Hadrien to fuck off, and Char who just broke Nate's heart. You gotta come."
"And bring wine!" Nancy yells in the background.
"Okay, but I'm at work ri..." I hold my breath as Dean licks my clit and puts two fingers inside of me. God, it feels so good! Okay, concentrate Kacie! "... right now."
"Then tell Dean to fuck off and get over here!" Angie laughs.
"Are you gals high or something?" I laugh. Dean is moving his fingers, finding my g-spot and rubs it, while his wet tongue is still playing with my clit, trying to shift my focus back to him.
"No, we just took control of our lives, I guess."
I tell her I'll be there as soon as I can, and then Dean reaches for my phone. I put it down on the desk out of his reach.
"Will you concentrate on us now?" he asks from between my legs in that demanding tone that is no longer as sexy as it was to begin with.
"I have no trouble concentrating, and I'm great at multitasking" I smile at him. "I was just about to come, when you stopped."
"Oh, I'll make you come," he promises and gets up to kiss my lips. He's still fully dressed, but I can clearly feel his erection through his pants as he grinds against me.
A sudden knock on the door puts an end to our little playtime. I get off the table in no time, and the new girl opens the door.
"Dean, I'm sorry to bother you, but can you come help me?"
"Sure darling," he answers. She leaves, and before Dean follows her, he whispers to me.
"Stay here, Baby Girl. You owe me."
What?! I don't owe him anything. I didn't even come, and I can feel the sexual tension turning into frustration in my whole body. My shift ended half an hour ago, and I have absolutely no reason to stay. I look around Dean's office, and I put a bottle of white wine in my backpack before I leave.
***
Outside the bar I run into Luke, Nate and Hadrien.
"Hey! It's my favorite girl!" Luke yells before he runs over to hug me.
"Hey guys," I smile at them.
"Come party with us!"
"Aww, I can't. I'm on my way to Angie's to hang with the girls."
"Nooo, come party with us!" Luke begs, and Nate and Hadrien join him.
"We're much more fun," Hadrien points out.
"Listen, I'd love to party with you, but my loyalty is to my girls right now. You know that."
"I thought your loyalty was to me?" Luke pouts, and I laugh at him. He looks annoyingly cute when he pouts.
"You know I love you. But my girls need me tonight. And... I think you all know that, don't you?"
"Yeah, we just left Angie and Nancy's place," Nate admits, sounding defeated.
"So, you're here to... celebrate? Or drink away your sorrows?" I ask careful not to step on anyone's toes.
"To drink and forget," Hadrien claims.
"To drink and forget," the others join in.
"Okay, well don't do anything stupid," I demand. They're college athletes, so whatever trouble they do get into probably won't be so big that their coach won't be able to get them out of it, hopefully. As crazy and wrong as it is, there's a lot of money riding on these boys, the football team and their success, so both the local cops, the local residents and the college administration tend to look the other way when they do something stupid. Or they look out for them when they're out and make sure to cover their asses if something goes wrong. Sometimes it's like they have get-out-jail-free-cards. Luckily my guys don't make the most trouble and I've never heard or seen them do anything even remotely close to inappropriate, even when pissing drunk. They're not frat boys.
Nancy
Angie went out for a moment and came back with some beer, and then Kacie joined us with a bottle of wine. We order pizza and sit around chatting, making sure that Kacie is up to date with what happened today. We laugh a lot at the absurd situation, and it's been too long since I've really laughed. I've missed this and I didn't even know, 'cause I was so caught up with Luke. I'll never admit it, but right now I'm sort of glad that Angie forced me out of my cocoon of sadness.
"So let me get this right," Kacie begins. "You all turned down guys you actually like, cause they are acting like idiots, granted they have been idiots, except Char who turned down Nate for a boyfriend that's never around and seem like kind of an ass, and we're all now, including the guys, drinking to try and forget who we like, why we like and why we shouldn't lick... sorry, like?" she giggles.
"Sounds about right," Angie says as she takes a swig of her beer.
"They all looked like lost puppy dogs when I saw them in front of the bar. So, well done girls, you have succeeded in making them feel bad." Kacie says it in a light tone, and I don't think she means to come off as being judgmental, but I know she's just as protective of the boys as she is the girls, so I don't think she can help it sometimes. She doesn't like when any of us are sad or unhappy with each other. I know it puts her in a difficult position being in the middle like that but taking Luke back or forgiving him just isn't that simple. The room goes quiet for a bit, and I think we all feel slightly judged.
"Random question," Kacie says looking at me, perhaps trying to dispel the sudden awkwardness. "But where are your glasses?"
"Oh, I'm wearing contacts. I used to like glasses better, but I needed a change and it's also easier when I'm swimming," I explain.
"It suits you. It really brings out your blue eyes," Kacie says, and I think I'm blushing a little bit.
"Wait, when you're swimming?!" Char asks.
"I started swimming."
"Oh. I didn't see that one coming. You never wanted to swim at the beach back home."
"I know, and I still don't want to. But the pool is clean, there's no fish or anything gross like that, and I can see the bottom," I say.
Angie starts laughing. Not in a cruel way, but I don't get why she laughs.
"Sorry," Angie then says. "But are you afraid of the ocean?"
"I'm not afraid of it. I just don't like it."
"Sure... I guess I will have to take you swimming in the sea sometime." She claims to love swimming – also in open water, but from what I've seen she just splashes around flirting with everyone.
"Sure," I tell her. I'm not afraid of the water. But it's cold and the waves are big, and I just never liked swimming in the sea. Also, fish are totally gross! But I don't want Angie to make it sound like she's better than me or that I don't know anything just because I don't come from a broken home or whatever her problem is.
"Moving on to something completely different," I begin. "Char, have you told Andrew about Nate?"
"No..." she mumbles.
"Well, don't you think you should?" Kacie asks.
"Yeah, no, I just... nothing really happened between us, and it didn't mean anything..."
"And you don't wanna upset Andrew?" I guess out loud.
"That too," Char smiles.
"Okay, but seriously. Either nothing happened OR what happened didn't mean anything," Angie says teasingly. "Which one is it?"
"We all know you two were glued together on New Year's, and you were hella cute together," Kacie adds.
"I know, I know. And Nathan's a nice guy, but normally I would never kiss someone else, and all I really wanna do is forget all about it," Char says. She's blushing, and I wonder if it's just because she has to talk about her feelings, or if she secretly wants to be with Nate. I know both Angie and Kacie really like him, and honestly; he cannot be any worse than fucking Andrew! I'm sure she'll tell me when I get some time alone with her.
***
After a few hours the beers are gone, and only a little of the wine remains. We all realize that Valentine's Day is coming soon, and with what happened earlier today it feels like anything can happen.
"So, Kacie is obviously going out with Dean," I say. "And Char is obviously NOT going out with Nate."
"Well, obviously!" Char adds. "And from how Angie lights up when she sees Hadrien, she won't be able to stay mad at him for long."
"I do not light up when I see him!" Angie protests.
"Then what is that smile on your lips? Is that from just thinking about him?" I tease.
"Or from hearing his name?" Kacie adds.
We tease her, and she hides her face in her hands.
"What is happening to me?" she mumbles from behind her hands.
"You're in love," I tell her.
"Bah," she answers like a child.
"By the way it's not obvious that I would go out with Dean," Kacie says saving Angie. "We're fooling around. We're not dating."
"But would you go out with someone else?" I ask her.
"The question is: Would you go out with someone else?" she asks back.
"I would never go out with Dean in the first place," I say.
"No silly, someone other than Luke! I really think you should, you know."
"I don't know... I'm not ready." The truth is that I don't want anyone else. And if Luke asked me out on Valentine's, I'd probably say yes. Thinking about that romantic night when we went ice skating, I actually very much want to spend Valentine's Day with Luke. I've wanted to since I was 12. Always wishing for a Valentine's card from him, but of course never getting one. Yes, if Luke asks me out this year for Valentine's, I'd definitely say yes. Even though I shouldn't. And I'd never admit it to the girls. This whole "getting over Luke"-thing is going pretty well, and I don't want to seem weak in front of my friends, but it's Luke Parker! What can a girl do?!
I've zoned out for a minute, but now the others are trying to think of someone to set me up with. I think we're all a bit drunk at this point.
"What about Justin?" Kacie asks.
"He's just so boring..." Angie replies.
"Then what about..." Char begins.
"Hey, what about Fratboy Stephen? He was nice, wasn't he?" Angie suggests looking at Kacie.
"That could work. He was actually nice, and very good looking too!"
"Hey, come on! I'm not going out with a frat boy," I protest.
"But he's not that frat boy-ish," Kacie points out. "I had fun with him. He's a pretty good dancer, and he made me laugh. And he's a great kisser."
"It might be good for you," Char joins in. "Focus on someone else for a while. You don't have to marry the frat boy, but a bit of fun won't kill you."
"I guess," I say. There's no getting out of this one. And after tonight there's no point in hoping that Luke will ask me out again.
Nathan
We've been drinking beer and weird shots for hours, and I almost forget why we went drinking in the first place. Moments closes and we take an Uber to a bar in downtown Seattle. Hadrien takes us to a gay bar where he apparently hangs out a lot.
"It's not a gay bar," he insists and hands both me and Luke another beer. "It's queer friendly."
"Same, same," Luke says. He's not homophobic or anything, to Luke it just doesn't matter. And if it doesn't have vagina, he ain't interested.
We sit down on some red velvet chairs next to an old piano. Hanging from the ceiling are several stilettos. Man-sized. There are maybe a handful of men in wigs and in full drag, and Hadrien knows half of them by name. Standing by the entrance are two very pretty women – I'm pretty sure they're women – in their 30's drinking wine but I try not to look at them too much, I don't want outside company tonight. I just want to hang out with my boys.
"So, why do you even know this place?" I ask laughing.
"I like the atmosphere." Hadrien shrugs his shoulders. "Everyone is welcome here, and I like that."
Luke mumbles something under his breath about what he would like and looks at his phone, but I can't hear it over the show tune music currently blasting through the speakers.
"No!" I say way too loud, as the show tune music suddenly stops, causing a few of the patrons to look over at us with alarm and slight outrage. "No phones and no moping over girls tonight." I say lowering my voice.
"That's right," Hadrien agrees. "A deal is a deal. We're here to have fun."
"Well, what should we do, then?" Luke is getting impatient just hanging out, doing nothing. He doesn't like staying stationary for long periods at a time. It makes him restless. I've only seen him stay in place whenever Kacie falls asleep on him on our couch or when he is around Nancy. Even playing PS5 he'll leave in the middle of a game if it takes too long to finish. Nobody wants to be on his CS-team when we have the guys over. The last time we did, he got a text from Nancy and got up and left right away leaving his teammates to be slaughtered by my team.
"I suppose I can't get any of you to sing a song?" Hadrien nods towards the piano. "On quiet nights I usually play something."
"Of course you do!" Luke laughs. "Just like you always happen to find a guitar at parties so that you can impress the girls with your hair hanging down and your rusty voice. You're not Harry Fucking Styles, you know."
"That's not why I –"
"Yes, it is. Admit it," I say. "And how is Coco, by the way?" I grin.
"Shut up!"
We all drink. I look around the place, and I guess Hadrien is right. Everyone seems to be welcome here, and I get why he likes it. Personally, I wouldn't come here alone. I might end up being eaten by one of those wigged men.
"I know what we can do! Let's get a tattoo!"
"Sure," Luke says leaning back in the chair like he doesn't care at all.
I don't want a tattoo. I don't have any tattoos and I certainly don't want one now!
"Let's go, I know just the right place." Hadrien gets up, and Luke follows.
"Hey guys, stop for a sec," I say, and I can hear the panic in my voice. "I don't want a tattoo!"
"You don't have to get one," Luke smiles. And of course I follow them to the street where we start walking.
"You only have one, right Pretty Face?" Hadrien asks.
"Yeah, I got a bear on my arm," Luke says sounding proud.
"Why a bear?" I ask.
"It's strong and fierce, and there are bears in the woods surrounding my hometown."
"I thought those were actually werewolves..."
"Oh, shut up. I'm so sick of vampires and werewolves."
"And you?" I ask Hadrien. "What about your tattoos?" It's not that I don't like tattoos, I find them quite fascinating, I just don't want any on me.
"Oh, I've got a few."
"You got more than a few, dude! But what are they?"
"Lot's a different stuff. Zahir and I used to get tattoos together. There's not that much to do in Montana once you've tipped over all the cows, you know?" He winks at me. I'm starting to feel uncomfortable. It's not like they would normally put pressure on me like that, and I know that I won't be getting a tattoo tonight. But still.
"What should we get though?" Luke wonders.
"Another bear?" I suggest.
"A Care Bear!" Hadrien chuckles. "That could be fun!"
"H, are you seriously suggesting that we all get a teddy bear with a heart on its tummy?" Luke says and I can't help but laugh at the image. Also, I know a little bit about Care Bears.
"You guys, there are different Care Bears. The one you mentioned is Tender Heart Bear, Luke."
They both look at me like I just confessed that I prefer hockey to football and I'm considering changing sports.
"I have a little sister, okay?!"
"What kind of Care Bears are there?" Hadrien asks with something that sounds like genuine interest.
"Well, there's Share Bear and Friend Bear and Funshine Bear and Daydream Bear and... I don't know man, there's a lot of bears." He laughs at me. Loud.
"Daydream Bear. That's totally you, Nate."
"Hey, is there a Sunflower Bear? You should get that one," Luke says chuckling.
"I'm not getting a tattoo, guys!" I insist once more.
"Sure thing. And H, you should get Pretentious Bear," Luke continues and laughs at his own joke.
"Oh yeah? Well, you should get Skanky Bear then!"
"Or Fuck-up Bear," I contribute mocking Luke who just laughs it off.
"To be honest," Hadrien laughs, "we should all get a Fuck-up Bear!"
"Yeah, and you could just as well get Skanky Bear as me, H." Luke laughs lightly shoving Hadrien's shoulders.
We go on like that until we get to the tattoo parlor. And then I keep quiet, hoping they'll forget about me. There's a little voice inside me that tells me that if I should ever get a tattoo, a sunflower wouldn't be the worst idea ever.
"Hi David," Hadrien greets the tattoo artist.
"Hi guys. What can I do for you tonight? I'm just finishing up here, and then I'm all yours." He's working on a huge guy's arm and the sound of the tattoo gun makes me dizzy.