Merlin blinked. He was still recovering from the Diomere healing him. He'd seen Morgana get up, not even glancing in his direction, long after the Knights and King had departed, and stumble away. Mordred had stabbed her to protect Arthur, while Merlin had lost consciousness from his wounds from when Morgana flung him into the cave walls. Mordred had protected Arthur. He had no reason to protect the King of a kingdom who persecuted magic users. Even if Arthur hadn't held many executions, it was still illegal. All these thoughts were running through his head and fleeing as soon as he thought them. He reached up to touch his temple. It still ached, but he was no longer dying, so that was something.
He had been left behind, he was certain of it now. The silence around him was deafening. Or he thought it was. After a time, he realized he must have dozed off. When he opened his eyes again, he found Aithusa watching him. Apparently the small dragon refused to abandon him. Merlin reached forward and Aithusa nuzzled his hand.
"I'm sorry for what happened to you. I should not have left you alone. I thought Kilgharrah would take care of you. Can you forgive me?" Merlin had tears streaming down his face as he sat up and leaned into the small dragon. Aithusa purred, or it sounded like a purr to Merlin. He choked out a laugh as the dragon wrapped its neck around him like a hug. The dragon helped him to his feet and they walked to find their way out of the caverns. Tools lay scattered on the ground, along with the bodies of several saxon guards. Merlin stumbled several times, but Aithusa was there to steady him. When they made it to the keep and saw it empty, Merlin let out a shaky breath. They had actually left him. Forgotten him. Would they even ever remember he was missing? Would it be soon? Hours? Days? It had taken them over five days to reach the keep, would they figure it out before they reached Camelot? Ten years. Ten years Merlin had dedicated to Camelot and Arthur. He didn't hold it against Arthur, the King had been injured badly by Morgana. But, Gwaine? Percival? Leon?
Merlin couldn't hold back the sob that choked it's way out of him. He covered his face with his hand as if that could help him hold back the emotions that flooded through him. Aithusa leaned against his legs as if the pressure could reassure Merlin. After a few moments, Merlin was able to get his composure mostly back.
"I guess it's just you and me now, eh?" Merlin said hoarsely. "Come on then, we've got a lot of ground to cover." Merlin touched the dragon's head and let some of his magic run over the disfigured body. Aithusa shuddered as some of the aches eased. The dragon keened as the formerly damaged wings stretched out for the first time without pain. Merlin smiled. "It isn't much, but I promise I'll help get you well again. I'm not great at healing magic, but I think if we work together that we can get you back in shape. Is there anywhere you'd like to go? I know they left me, but I am still needed in Camelot. I'd like to be close in case they remember." Merlin grabbed a few of the furs that had been left behind and shoved a cap over his head to try to protect from the cold. As they walked, he would reach over and occasionally trail a finger along Aithusa's scales and send some comforting magic over. They made it away from the snow and ice after the first day, so they were able to find wood and have a fire to keep them both warm. Merlin would lean against a tree or a log and Aithusa would curl around him. Merlin couldn't explain what it was, but Aithusa made him feel more complete. Closer to being whole than he had felt in a long while. Like something had been missing but he hadn't known what it was until now. He would murmur softly to Aithusa until he fell asleep.
They had managed to make it most of the way back without encountering anyone. Merlin didn't want to press his luck. When he made it to the lake where he'd sent Freya, and later, Lancelot, to rest, he stopped. He used his magic and constructed a three walled structure. It resembled a house without the front wall. He made a small indention in the ground as a sort of bed in the dirt for Aithusa to curl up in. The dragon watched as Merlin moved each piece into place and once the bed had been dug out, the dragon bounced over to it and circled around in it, much like a cat, before laying down. The dragon looked up at the dragonlord and Merlin could see the smile. Already the color was coming back to the pale colored scales. The brightness was showing, edging out the dull tones. While the wings had mostly healed from the disfigurement, Merlin was having trouble with the dragon's legs. He could ease the discomfort and joint pain, but the bones were fighting him. Merlin sat next to Aithusa and ran his hands along the misshapen leg, hoping to feel if there was something he was missing. But once his hands circled the leg, he knew there was nothing to be done. He could fix the other smaller injuries, but he could not reshape the bones that had grown incorrectly. Aithusa didn't seem to mind.
Da
Merlin jumped, surprised at the sound.
"Aithusa?"
Da!
"Aithusa! You're speaking! That's wonderful love!" Merlin exclaimed, placing a kiss on the dragon's head. They sat together then, just watching the water and the sun crawl across the sky. Merlin had begun humming after a while, as he stroked a hand over the rough dragon scales. After a while he started singing. He sat with Aithusa and sang, just reveling in the feel of the sunshine and the fact that he didn't have anyone who expected anything of him right now. Right here he was free to be himself. At one point as he sang he thought he caught a glimpse of Freya watching him from the shallows of the lake.
Da
"Hmm?" Instead of an answer, Merlin heard Aithusa's stomach rumble, and his own echoed shortly after. "Ah. Alright, let me get some food. You stay right here love, I'll get something to eat." Merlin put some wood together in a small pit in front of the dragon-hut. Aithusa blew flames at it to get it started and smiled at Merlin proudly once they were crackling away. "That's fantastic." Merlin reassured the dragon. He didn't take long catching a few rabbits and a pheasant. Merlin tossed one of the rabbits towards Aithusa who snapped it up in one gulp. He dressed the remaining rabbit and pheasant to make a stew with the herbs he'd also collected. As he sat there he started singing again. Aithusa seemed to enjoy it and would hum along with him. He ate and settled down in the small hut next to Aithusa as the stars came out. Aithusa's head settled in his lap and he lay his hand protectively over the lean neck.
Merlin couldn't remember the last time he'd slept so soundly. It was like he had needed Aithusa to chase away his fears and stress all this time. When Merlin cracked his eyes open in the morning light, it was to find a confused knight of Camelot staring at him. Merlin blinked several times to make sure he wasn't seeing things.
"Gwaine?"
"Merlin."
"Uh, hello ...", Merlin's voice was still deep from sleep and he didn't want to wake Aithusa.
"Merlin, where have you been? And why are you cuddling a dragon?" Gwaine asked warily.
"Where have I been?" Merlin actually scoffed, which woke Aithusa. Merlin shuffled out from under the dragon and stood to face the knight. "I was walking back from Ismere. Imagine my surprise when I woke from being nearly killed by Morgana to find everyone gone. Saxons, gone. Morgana, gone. Knights and King of Camelot, gone. I know I'm a servant, and I know that Arthur was injured and the priority would have been to get him to Camelot as soon as possible, but call me naïve for thinking that someone, anyone, would have noticed me missing. I've only been by the man's side for ten years." Merlin paused, still standing between the Knight and the dragon. Aithusa was watching him warily, picking up on his anxiety.
Da?
"I'm fine, Aithusa." Merlin turned to look at the dragon, to try to reassure that he was ok, though he knew how anxious he really felt. He turned back to face the Knight. "The dragon, Aithusa, is mine. It's a long story, not that it matters, but I planned to make sure that Aithusa was safe and had a home before I attempted to see if I was still needed in Camelot. What are you doing out here? How did you find me?"
"Merlin, first, I noticed you were missing, but we were already to the city before I did. I'm sorry. I should have noticed sooner. The others should have noticed, but they were all worked up about the King and the boy who helped him escape."
"Mordred." Merlin said the name with no emotion.
"Yes. Anyway, Arthur is still confined to his bed, per Gaius' orders. To say he was upset that no one had seen you, is an understatement. A couple of us volunteered to run a patrol and search for you. I can't say how I found you. I've never seen this place before. Felt drawn here. Can't really explain it. It's nice though." Gwaine said and went closer to the hut and sat down.
Da?
"Why do they call you that?" Gwaine asked.
"Da? Oh, uh, well, I, uh, hatched Aithusa." Merlin said softly. "I'm a dragonlord."
"Mm. Makes sense, I suppose. How are you, little one? Looks like your Da fixed you up a lovely home." Gwaine said, looking like he really wanted to pet the dragon. Merlin rolled his eyes and gave Aithusa a look that said, go on. Aithusa's head leaned over toward the Knight, who scratched at the scales on the side of the dragon's neck.
"You're not ... I don't know, mad? Angry?" Merlin asked.
"Merlin, I'm not from Camelot. I grew up in Caerleon. Magic isn't illegal there. I take it your father was a dragonlord?"
"Yes."
"Mm. Well you are lovely, deary. You look much better than you did when I saw you last. Has your Da been healing you?" Gwaine asked.
Da!
Aithusa practically shouted with excitement. Gwaine laughed softly, and smiled at Merlin. Merlin grinned back.
"You won't tell Arthur, will you?" Merlin asked quietly.
"Merlin. I came to Camelot because of you all those years ago. I stay because you make me want to be better. I think if we work together we might be able to get the King to broaden his views on magic. Would you like me to help you with that?" Gwaine was looking at him with such sincerity, that Merlin's jaw just hung open. He felt like he momentarily forgot how to speak. Gwaine stood up and closed Merlin's mouth with a finger under his chin. Before the warlock could react, Gwaine leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. Merlin felt like he might pass out. He could swear he heard giggling coming from the lake. Freya. Of course she would find this amusing.
"So, how long do you plan to stay here? I can send word back that you were needed to help a sick family member and won't return for at least a few days. You should probably send a note though too. Don't need the King all riled up."
"I'll need a few days at least. Just long enough to get Aithusa settled. I know Freya will be a good caretaker, but I want to make sure Aithusa knows this is a safe place."
"Freya?"
"The Lady of the Lake." Merlin answered, as if that explained everything.
"And why would a mystical Lady of the Lake watch a dragon for you?"
"Because she loved him and he loved her." A voice called from the water. Merlin smiled and looked at her longingly.
"Freya." Merlin breathed her name and she smiled at him. In the blink of an eye she was gone again. Merlin sighed.
"Holding out on me, eh, Merlin?"
"No. Not really. She died. Years ago. I put her to rest here and the Triple Goddess made her the Lady of the Lake."
"I'm sorry."
"Not your fault. I've lost all those that have known about even parts of my gifts. Part of why I've hid it all for so long. Anyway, it's not important. We can talk about it over the next few days, if you plan to stay, that is?" Merlin questioned.
"Alright. Give me a few hours and I'll be back. Then you can tell me about your Lady of the Lake or not. Maybe you can teach me a little magic." Gwaine winked at Merlin and then headed towards a horse that Merlin wasn't sure how he hadn't heard them when they arrived.
Da.
"I know love. Breakfast." Merlin sighed and watched the long haired knight disappear. His life was suddenly much more complicated than he'd thought it could get.