His hands gripped her tightly, trembling as they broke apart. He didn't want to open his eyes, scared that she would disappear. He could feel the tears running down his cheeks, trying to hold back a sob as he kept her close to him.
"I'm so sorry," his voice cracked as he fell to his knees in front of her. "Please forgive me. I should've known better."
Getting down to face him, Vanessa took his face in her hands. "Pelle, you have nothing to be sorry for. I'm not, nor have I ever been, mad at you. If I was you I would have thought the same thing. Please, don't be upset."
His head snapped up, his blue eyes bloodshot as the tears ran down his painted face. So many emotions showed in his eyes; relief, fear, regret.
For so many years he had tried to be strong, to show that no matter what anyone thought or heard, he was just as dead as he let on; that there were no feelings in his black heart. Everything he tried to convince people of had become undone in a matter of minutes. The man they all thought of as unfeeling was now a sobbing mess on the floor. Everything he had done on stage to show that he could care less about anything around him, including himself, now meant nothing.
In front of him, he could see the annoyed faces of some of the fans as they watched. Part of him wanted to feel bad to some degree. They had paid to be here, looking to spend time with the bands and just have fun. As much as he wanted to feel bad, he couldn't have cared less. He had put on a show for them long enough, now it was time for him to be a little selfish for once.
"I've waited so long for you," he managed. "I can't count how many times I told myself that I'd never see you again just to make the pain stop. I tried being with other people, I tried everything to put you out of my mind because I was mad at myself for ever losing you to begin with. I tried so hard to find you, I looked on everything I could think of, every social media platform that there was...but you never came up. I'm sorry I ever let you go."
"Pelle, I'm not mad at you. I don't want you to feel bad anymore. The important thing is that we're here together now. I love you and always will no matter what happens."
"I'm never letting you go again. I won't let you out of my sight again."
"I won't leave you," she whispered. "I promise."
Standing once again, Dead pulled her into his arms, his head resting against hers. He didn't expect her to want to stay at the party, hell, even he didn't want to stay for it; but he had to stay for a while at least.
"We can leave soon if you want," he pointed out. "I know this isn't exactly ideal."
She shook her head, smiling softly at him. "We have all the time in the world to talk about everything later. I don't wanna make people any more annoyed than they already are."
"Are you sure? If you change your mind just tell me and we can leave."
"I'm sure."
Glancing over her shoulder, Vanessa motioned for Valerie to come join them.
"Pelle," she started. "This is my sister Valerie."
Dead nodded once in her direction, still keeping a tight grip on Vanessa. "It's nice to meet you."
Valerie made an awkward wave. "It's nice to meet you too. I'm glad that you two finally are back together. I really hated seeing my sister so upset. I know seeing that creep didn't help anything."
Dead made a face, quickly looking down at Vanessa. "Creep?"
She let out a sigh. "I wasn't going to mention it tonight, but I had run into Varg not too long ago. I asked him to help me get in touch with you and he flat out refused saying that I was only doing any of this to live out some kind of fan-girl dream."
Dead scowled, his grip becoming almost painful. "He never said anything about talking to you."
"Don't worry about it right now," she pleaded. "Let's just enjoy tonight."
It took a minute, but eventually he gave in, loosening his grip on her. "I'll show you where we go and hang out. Varg won't be there but Fenriz and Frost will be. I'm sure Necro and Hellhammer will be happy to see you again. Oh, and someone else might be happy to see you too."
Vanesssa turned to Valerie. "Do you want to come with us or head back to the hotel?"
Valerie smiled. "I'll hang out for a little while. Might be fun."
"Might meet someone that actually has good taste in music," she joked.
Valerie rolled her eyes. "There's nothing wrong with my music."
Following Dead to the back of the room to the bar, Vanessa could see the familiar faces of Necrobutcher and Hellhammer standing beside Euronymous, along with another woman that looked vaguely familiar.
"Dead!" called Necro. "You killed it tonight!"
His eyes moved to where Vanessa stood, clinging to his arm. It took him a moment to recognize her, but once he made the connection a mix of emotions flashed across his face. Vanessa could see the happiness in his eyes as well as what she could only call confusion. The latter was quickly replaced with happiness.
"Welcome back!" he smiled, patting her on the back as they reached the table. "Pelle hasn't stopped going on about you. Maybe now he'll find something new to talk about."
Vanessa smiled awkwardly, not sure how to feel. "I'm sorry about how things were handled. I should have told you guys sooner about everything."
"Water under the bridge, sweetheart," Necro smiled. "I'm just glad you two can be happy again. Jan! Bring Mel over!"
Vanessa's eyes widened as the woman walked over to them, finally recognizing her.
"Melanie?" she asked excitedly. "It's so good to see you!"
Melanie gave a soft smile. "It's great to see you too, Nessa."
Vanessa motioned towards Valerie. "This is my older sister Valerie. Valerie, this is Melanie. She was my closest friend when I was with Pelle."
Melanie furrowed her brow slightly. "Not close enough to know what was going on though."
"Mel," Necro started.
"No," Vanessa cut him off. "She's right. I shouldn't have kept it from you guys. This whole mess probably could have been avoided if I had just come clean in the first place. Melanie, you were my best friend and not telling you was wrong. I know that doesn't change anything and it certainly doesn't make us best friends now, but I hope we can start over."
Melanie nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that. Besides, if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be with Jan or having his kid."
"I'm so happy for you!"
"Yeah," Euronymous ground out. "We're all happy for them."
Vanessa could feel Dead's grip tighten again, watching as Euronymous walked over to them. The anger in his eyes was all too apparent from where she stood.
"Euronymous," she started.
He quickly cut her off. "Save it. There's not a damn thing you can say to make what happened okay. Because of you, there's a ban on going through time at all. Because of you I couldn't go back and save the one person I actually gave a damn about! I could forgive not telling us until later, I can forgive you focusing only on saving Dead for whatever reason you had, but I can't forgive the apparent negligence. I get that being sent back wasn't your fault, but if there was a system put in place to keep people from going missing and causing a damn panic you should have used it! I know it's not all on you and that plenty of people came back just as guilty, but you were the straw that broke the camel's back!"
"Lay off, Øystein," Dead growled. "She didn't do it on purpose."
"How did she not? She knew the rules and just up and left! How is that not on purpose?"
Vanessa could only stand there and listen, her voice caught in her throat. Euronymous had every right to be angry at her. Good intentions or not, she had played a part in taking away the chance for him to get his own happy ending.
"I'm sorry," she cried. "I can't change what I did but I can talk to the people who put the ban in place and try to fix it. I can't promise anything, but I can try."
Euronymous glared at her, his eyes closing for a moment before nodding. "This doesn't mean I forgive you, or that we're friends."
Valerie stepped closer, her eyes almost challenging. "She said she'd do her best. I don't know exactly who you are, but I think you need to cut her some slack. None of this has been easy on her either. I've had to literally watch her lose weight because she was punishing herself for everything. Why don't you follow your friend's advice and lay off."
For a moment, the guitarist seemed taken aback. Raising his hands in mock-defeat he took a step away from Valerie. The anger still showed in his eyes, but Vanessa could also see a small hint of respect. Very few people ever stood up to him, even when they did most times he still got his way. Whatever the reason for him backing down, she wasn't about to argue it. The only thing that mattered now was Dead. Snuggling against his chest, she watched as he interacted with the fans, laughing every now and again at a joke or a story. Finally, things felt right again. She was finally back in his arms where she belonged.