Hex left for work before I woke this morning. I felt the briefest of kisses being pressed to my forehead and it eventually woke me but by the time I had opened my eyes the front door had clicked closed.
I lie in bed for a while thinking about last night; or early this morning. I still don't know what time it was but it doesn't really matter.
Hex had fallen asleep quickly after lying on me as the residue of his tears sat on my skin. I wish he would have taken today off, there's no doubt that he's over-worked and I think Clyde would have let him. It had taken me longer to fall back asleep though, the sight of a distraught Hex standing in the bathroom had kept me awake for hours. I hadn't ever seen him like that before. So emotional, so upset and so confused on what to do next. Whatever Harley had said to him had really messed him up and I knew it couldn't have just been a normal conversation about Wyonna.
I roll out of bed and crawl into the shower, hoping to wake myself up with the intention of talking to Harley on my mind.
"Good morning" I jump as mum enters the kitchen, I hadn't heard her door open or her feet walking towards me. "Did I scare you? Sorry, honey" she places a kiss on my cheek before beginning to make a coffee for herself.
"Morning mum" I reply back, my voice still thick with sleep. It was noticeable that I hadn't got much sleep last night, my red eyes and constant yawning is proof of that and mum picks up on it immediately, like only a mother can.
"You okay, honey?" She asks as I take a seat at the kitchen island and start to eat my breakfast while she leans against the kitchen counter and sips her coffee. She's still dressed in her pyjamas and hadn't brushed her hair yet, something she would have never done while living with dad.
"Yeah, just didn't get a lot of sleep last night" I explain as I rub my hands over my tired eyes as they sting. The toast that I'm eating is hard to swallow and makes my stomach roll slightly but I know I'll struggle at work if I don't eat.
Mum doesn't answer me and when I pull my hands from my eyes the look of concern on her face surprises me.
"I heard Hex last night" she states. Her concern makes sense all of a sudden. "Is he alright?" She asks and takes another sip of coffee, blowing over the rim of the mug to cool the liquid.
"Yeah" I reply quietly as I look down at my plate. "He's having a hard time coming to terms with Wyonna being sick" I explain and look at mum again. I see the sadness in her eyes for Hex, and I have no doubt mine reflexs hers. "I don't know how to help him" I whisper helplessly because I know that if I talk too loud my voice will break.
"There's not much you can do for him, honey" mum pushes off the counter and leans on the other side of the island to look me in the eye. "Just make sure he knows you're there for him and everything will work out the way it's meant to" she makes her way around the island. "You can't change what's written in the book" she gives me a hug of comfort, it does little to make me feel better.
*
"Hey, what did you talk to Hex about last night?" I question Harley as Sarah goes out the back to grab extra beverages that we had run out of at the bar. I had been waiting all morning to finally have a word with Harley one on one without Sarah around or any customers and the opportunity had finally presented itself.
Harley turns to look at me, first with a blank stare and then it slowly turns to confusion. "Hex?" She questions to which I nod, urging her to tell me. "He didn't call me last night" she says as she places a glass down and faces me, turning her full attention to me.
My mouth opens like I'm going to say something but nothing comes out.
"He said he called me?" Harley questions for clarification. I nod again, the words stuck in my throat. Why would he lie to me? "What time?"
"Like, I don't know, in the middle of the night" I stutter out, unsure of the time I had awoken to an empty bed.
Harley takes out her phone and I watch as she goes through her call log, I pray that she somehow missed his call but she shakes her head while sliding her phone back in her pocket.
"Nope, didn't call me. Besides, any time after eleven and I was out like a light" she exclaims and picks up the glass again.
So that means that it wasn't something that Harley had said that upset him at all. Was it even about Wyonna or had he lied about that too? Harley notices my distant mind as I continue standing in place.
"Why? What happened?" She asks, her eyebrows pulling together in concern.
"N-no, nothing" I spit out and turn around to grab a glass off the shelf and start to wash it, even though its already clean.
Harley comes up to me and grabs my arm, pulling me away from the glass. "What happened, Poppy?" She asks again, her voice becoming firm with worry.
"I-I don't know, Harley" I say and drop the glass completely, it falls to the bottom of the sink with a dull thud. "He was on the phone and then came into the bedroom so upset. So, so upset. He said he was talking to you about your mother" I explain, trying my best to hold back my own tears as I watch Harley's eyes well up at the mention of her mother. "He was crying, Harley" I whisper, hoping it stops my voice from cracking like it did this morning but it doesn't work.
"R-right" Harley's voice shakes as she speaks; it causes her to clear her throat. I manage to hold back my tears as I turn back to the glass and Harley turns back to her own glass. "Well, he didn't call me" she states quietly from behind me.
It's silent between us for a while. Not an awkward silence, more of a 'getting our heads wrapped around what is happening' kind of silence. I don't know why Hex lied to me; I don't feel any kind of panic or betrayal, just confusion. And I don't think he did it out of spite or to hide something, the feeling in my gut is telling me that.
"Hey, is this it?" Sarah shocks us out of our thoughts as we both jump in sync. I see her look of confusion as her eyes move between the two of us while her hands hold two bottles of scotch.
I spend the rest of the day running on auto pilot and I can tell that Harley's mind is elsewhere too. I serve customers and clean up. I'm so consumed in my mind that I completely skip lunch and I don't even feel the hunger until late in the afternoon. Time flies by and before I know it, I'm walking in the front door of my home.
The apartment is empty when I arrive and the note on the kitchen table from mum informs me that she's down at the shops and will be back soon. I go through all the cupboards, snacking on anything that sounds good until I'm full and then I make my way to the bedroom. I pause briefly and wonder if I should shower but decide to do that later as I crawl into bed.
"Baby" I have no idea what time it is or how long I've slept when Hex wakes me. It's dark in the bedroom so either its dark outside too or Hex had closed the curtains before waking me. He leans over me, his face above mine while he's still dressed in his work clothes. He has grease smudged on his cheek and I resist the urge to wipe it away. "Are you okay?" He asks, his face twisted in concern. He holds the back of his hand to my forehead, checking my temperature.
"Yeah, just tired" I say quietly and then purse my lips for a kiss. He bends down further and connects his lips to mine.
"I love you" he murmurs against my mouth, the words have a positive effect on my body and my heart pounds.
"I love you too" I reply. Hex pulls back and smiles. I become googily eyed, loving the smile that rises on his face.
He empties his pockets onto the bedside table as I roll onto my side and watch him closely. There's no sign of the man that needed my comfort last night, there's no sign that ever happened and I can't decide if it's a good thing or not.
"I'm going to shower and then we can make dinner, yeah?" Hex asks as he uses his hand to push back the hairs that had fallen over my forehead while I was asleep.
"Yeah" I agree and watch him walk into the bathroom. He pulls his shirt over his head, his tattooed muscles rippling underneath before the door closes behind him.
I think about joining him in the shower but I know if I do that I'll get my hair wet and I can't be bothered washing it or dealing with wet hair tonight. Besides, it's not hair washing night.
I roll onto my back and gaze at the ceiling, the light from under the bathroom door allows me to see some of the bedroom. Hex had indeed closed the curtains to the outside world but I can see through the cracks in the side that it is dark outside anyway.
I need to somehow confront Hex about the call last night. Who was it he called and why did it upset him so much? It had shaken me up to see him like that, to see a grown man cry. I had seen him tear up before but never had I ever seen those tears fall, he didn't even cry at being sent back to prison.
I hear the front door open and I know mum is home as the sound of her feet can be heard walking into the kitchen and I hear her drop bags of food onto the island. I have no idea how long she had been out but I'm glad she's getting out of the house and doing whatever she wants now.
The shower in the bathroom turns on and then seconds later I hear the sound of the water pattern change as Hex steps underneath it. I have to push the images of the water running down his body from my mind.
A buzz grabs my attention and for a second I'm confused on where it's coming from but the light that illuminates the room directs my attention to the bedside table and to Hex's phone that had just received a text message.