And so, we sailed on. We sailed until we reached a point in which the sea seemed to turn white. From there, Lucy, Eustace, Edmund, Percy, Caspian, Reepicheep, and I continued in a longboat. It turned out, the water was covered in white lilies. Smiling, I reached down and drew one out of the water.
It was the sweetest smelling flower I'd ever smelled in my life. My eyes closed as I held it. Memories flowed through my mind. Stumbling upon the wardrobe as a child, barely able to reach its knob. Entering it the first time and finding myself in a land of trees that danced. Catching a little star who'd fallen from the sky. Helping return it home and meeting Aslan. I remembered dancing with dryads, swimming with nymphs. I remembered waking in a frost covered world, meeting Lucy and her siblings.
Our battle against the White Witch, watching each other grow up. Falling in love with Peter, our first kiss, the night he proposed. I remembered our wedding day and the happy year that followed it. I remembered Percy's first breath and the first time he opened his precious eyes. His first giggle, his first words. And then the pain I felt when I lost him when we returned home.
The confusion and listlessness of those months until we returned. Meeting Caspian, our first defeat, facing the wickedness of Miraz' reign, the kindness of Alias and Miraz' wife. My pain and loneliness when the Pevensies returned to England and I could not go. Raising Percy with Caspian's help. This whole adventure.
A hand on my arm brought me back to the present. I opened my eyes looking up to see Percy watching me curiously.
"Are you alright, Mother?" he asked.
"Yes," I smiled, leaning down and placing the lily back in the water.
We lapsed into silence briefly. It was peaceful as Caspian and Edmund took turns rowing us throw the seemingly endless flowers.
"So what was it like?" Edmund broke the silence looking to Eustace, "When Aslan changed you back?"
"It was strange," he admitted, a thoughtful expression forming on his face, "That cuff had just kept getting tighter and tighter. And no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get it off on my own. Then he came toward me and removed it with surprising ease. He began to scratch away the scales after. It hurt, horribly so at some points, but it was a good kind of hurt. Like pulling a thorn out."
We all nodded in understanding, warm smiles on each of our faces as he recounted the tale.
"Being a dragon wasn't all bad though. I think I was a better dragon than I was a boy really. I'm so sorry for being such a sop," he continued.
"It's okay, Eustace," Edmund said, "You are a pretty good dragon."
"I'm glad you learned from this experience. What you felt? That good kind of pain? Many will experience when their time comes. Transformation is not an easy process, but with Aslan, all things are possible," I said slowly as they all looked to me, "When we turn from our old lives, we become a new creation and leave our past selves behind. Now that you have felt the relief and the comfort of the transformation, you can guide others and empathize with them."
He nodded.
"I plan to. I think everyone should have a chance to experience this newness," he agreed.
"Everyone," Reepicheep called and we all turned to the mouse, "We have arrived."
Before us, a small strip of beach lie. But what was just past the beach was what was truly awe-inspiring. The water flowed straight up into the air creating a barrier through which we could not see. My heart swelled with joy.
We reached the beach and left the boat. From the beach, we could just see glimpses of what lie beyond the water. Something in my heart wanted to go there, but I knew it was not yet time. We began walking toward the water, slowly to allow Percy to keep up with us.
"Aslan," Eustace breathed catching everyone's attention.
We all paused, the boys turning to give him a questioning look. But Lucy and I immediately looked back.
"Aslan," I breathed with a bright smile.
"Welcome children," he greeted smiling as well, "You have done well. Very well. You have come far and now your journey is at its end."
Percy gasped beside me. I looked over to see him looking up at me unsurely. I nodded confirming the question in his eyes.
"Is this your country?" Lucy asked gesturing to the beach we stood on.
"No, my country lies beyond," Aslan answered nodding toward the wall of water.
"Is my father in your country?" Caspian asked.
"You can only find that out for yourself, unfortunately," Aslan answered.
Caspian looked back to the wall of water.
"But you should know," Aslan warned, "That if you should continue, there is no return."
We watched as Caspian walked forward. He waded into the water and reached out. His hand dipped into the wall slowly. He stood gazing at it in silence for a moment. Then he turned away and returned to us.
"You're not going?" Edmund questioned looking surprised.
"I don't think my father would be very proud that I gave up what he died for," he answered slowly, "I've spent too long wanting what was taken from me and not appreciating what was given. I was given a kingdom, people..."
He turned to Aslan, resolution in his eyes.
"I promise to be a better king."
"You already are," the great lion nodded.
Aslan then turned to us.
"I guess it's time we get home," Edmund remarked with a smile.
Lucy's face fell and she turned to him. "But I thought you loved it here?"
"I do," Edmund nodded, "But I love home and our family as well. They need us."
She stepped back thinking about his words. Then she slowly nodded.
"You both will return to an age appropriate for your situation," Aslan said to Percy and I.
I nodded. Percy's brow furrowed, however. Aslan turned to him with a smile.
"Yes?"
"Does this mean I'll be a baby again?" he asked.
"Most likely," the lion nodded, "But do not fear. You will retain all your memories of Narnia so long as you continue to believe."
Percy smiled nodding, "I will."
"Good," Aslan chuckled.
Reepicheep cleared his throat stepping forward. We all looked down to the mouse warrior as he scampered forward.
"Your Eminence," he bowed to Aslan, "For as long as I can remember, I have dreamt of seeing your country. I've had so many great adventures in this world, but nothing has dampened that yearning. I know I am not worthy of such an honor, but with your permission, I would lay down my sword for the joy of seeing your country with my own eyes."
"My country was made for noble hearts such as yours. No matter how small their bearers be," Aslan answered.
Pure joy alighted the mouse's face. He swept a low bow.
"I do not believe there is anyone in all of Narnia more deserving of this honor," I said gently to the mouse, "Though I must say, it will be difficult to say goodbye, dear friend."
He bowed to me and the others, his smile only growing. Lucy knelt in the sand in front of him.
"May I?" she asked.
"Well...I suppose," he nodded, "Just this o-oh"
She cut him off with a tight hug. Despite his reservations, the mouse smiled and hugged her back.
"I will miss you greatly, Queen Lucy," he said softly.
He then turned to Eustace who had begun to cry. The boy, who had grown rather attached to the mouse even in his short time being here, moved forward and knelt down.
"Don't cry," Reepicheep called gently.
"I don't understand," Eustace stammered, "I-I won't see you again? Ever?"
Reepicheep gazed softly up at him.
"What a magnificent puzzle you are," he remarked, "And a true hero. It has truly been my honor to fight alongside such a great warrior and friend."
He then bowed and hurried to the water. There, a small canoe awaited him. He removed his sword, sticking it in the sand, and pushed the boat toward the wall of water. We watched with teary smiles as he paddled up and over the wall, vanishing from sight.
Percy hobbled over and put his arms around Eustace's waist. The boy smiled weakly at his younger cousin and returned the hug.
"This is our last time here, isn't it?" Lucy asked Aslan.
"Yes," he nodded walking toward us once again, "You have grown up, my dear one. Just like Peter and Susan."
She placed a hand on his cheek.
"Will you visit us in our world?" she asked.
"I shall be watching you always," he promised.
She sniffed, tears beginning to course down her cheeks, "How?"
"In your world, I am known by another name. You must learn to know me by it. That was why you were brought to Narnia to begin with. That by knowing me here for a little, you would know me better there," he explained.
His eyes met mine. I walked toward him slowly. My hands carded into his mane as I fell to my knees and pressed my face into the soft fur. I felt his paw press gently to my back. Silent tears slipped down my cheeks, but they were not of true sadness. It was more of a bittersweet feeling. A feeling of completion and longing all at once.
"I am more proud than I could ever put into words, my child," he spoke lowly, his words washing over me like a comforting blessing, "I have watched you grow into a beautiful young woman and seen you put into action all I have taught you. Your role in Narnia was a special one, my dear, and Narnia will forever be changed because of you. Your undying faith has saved the lives of thousands. I wish you would join me in my country, but I know it is not yet time."
I drew back to look him in the face.
"Yes," I nodded, shakily, "I still have so much to do."
"You have done so much, my child. You will always be my child. I love you, Aewryn," he said gently.
"I'll always love you, Aslan," I cried hugging him tightly one last time, "Until we meet again."
"Until we meet again," he echoed.
He turned and roared. The waters parted forming a tunnel. Caspian turned to the five of us, a somber expression on his face.
"You are the closest thing I have to family," he said, "That includes you, Eustace."
The boy looked surprised but smiled gratefully. "Thank you!"
Edmund and Caspian then embraced, both holding back tears. Lucy practically leapt into Caspian's arms, making him chuckle lightly as he hugged her. He then turned to Percy and me. I stepped forward hugging him tightly.
"Thank you, for watching over us and for helping me raise my son," I whispered in his ear, "I could never repay you for all you have done for my family."
"Knowing you will all be reunited is enough for me," he laughed softly, "Goodbye Aewryn..."
I drew away wiping tears from my eyes. Percy stood still for a moment. Then he launched himself into Caspian's arms, burying his head in the young man's chest. Caspian held onto him tightly, a tear slipping down his cheek.
"I've loved you as if you were my own son," he said gently, "And I hope one day to have a son like you. Be good to your mother and take care of her."
"I will," Percy nodded, his voice cracking.
The two drew away, their eyes shining with tears. Caspian nodded toward the rest of us with a smile.
"Are you ready?" I asked holding out my hand.
Percy grabbed it tightly, a bright smile on his face.
"Yes!"