" Steve, I'm sorry to call at this time. I know you are busy with patients and the hospital... But Lesley is very sick… she was gonna attempt to ride it out but I caught on and made her go straight back to bed... I'm gonna stay with her and keep an eye on things. Could you have Monica take my load and have Dr Richards call me when he gets a chance?"
" I can arrange that for you... Has her problem come back? You think maybe the cancer has come back again?" Steve asked
" I don't know Steve, she hasn't really told me anything but that's why I need Dr Richards to call me when he gets a chance." Rick replied
" I'll let him know that you are waiting to talk to him, Rick... Don't worry about things here just take care of Lesley and tell her that as one of my top doctors she needs to get better soon" Steve replied and got off the phone
Rick headed back upstairs to check on Lesley when Lesley was trying to get into her chair but had difficulty with her port always getting in the way
" Les, sweetheart, how can I help you get better.. you have to tell me what you need...." Rick asked while helping Lesley get up into her chair.
" I want to tell you Rick, believe me I really do.... But I can't.. I don't know how..." Lesley tried to turn away
" It's alright sweetheart...." Rick started and pulled Lesley into his arms " there isn't anything I would not do for you Les... You just gotta tell me what is wrong or what has my charming yet stubborn little bug so sick like this" Rick rubbed Lesley's back alittle bit
" I'm better now when I'm with you. I wish I could stay like this with you forever..." Lesley replied and cuddled close to Rick..
Rick stayed close incase Lesley was to need him for anything but was in no rush to leave her side instead he wanted to take her temperature and blood pressure while she was able to get some sleep.'at least her temperature and blood pressure are somewhat still normal' Rick thought to himself when answering the phone
" Hello..." Rick answered
" Dr. Webber, it's Jerry Richards... Dr Hardy said it was urgent that I call you." Dr Richards replied
" Thank you for calling me back... I'm concerned about Lesley, she's been on and off again with the vomiting as well as I've started to see that she's losing weight again... I'm concerned that she may have relapsed again which is why it was important that I call you immediately.." Rick expressed his concerns
" Any other symptoms that you may be aware of other than nausea and weight loss... Any dizziness or loss of appetite?" Dr. Richards asked
" Not that I was aware of, she hasn't really told me much of anything." Rick replied
" Alright keep an eye on her for the next few days Rick. If she should start having more severe symptoms like coughing up blood then I want her to be brought in right away." Dr Richards suggested
" Thank you Jerry, I appreciate it..."
~~~
Lesley waited until Rick left for the hospital before trying again to make it on her own. She wished to God she could tell him she really wanted to but the fact remained that her fears coupled with her ability to open to him about her condition and where her progress stood. And that was that the consulting doctor with Dr Richards had decided that her treatment wasn't gonna be an option. She only prayed that she could at least make it to see Rick's birthday as well as her own in a couple of months.
" Jessie... I've been thinking about what Dr Richards said and what you did as well... I um I've been thinking about this for awhile and I think I am gonna agree to stop the treatment but not before I decide to tell Rick the truth...”
" Lesley you can get better again you've done it before... Now I don't want to hear that you want to give up" Jessie replied
" Jessie please I don't want to hurt you or upset you.... You've always been more of a mother to me than a friend or colleague... This time I think it's time that we face the one fact that Dr Richards said.... The cancer is spreading quicker than we expected and this time treatment isn't changing it... Please don't try to talk me out of this.... Jessie I just want to make the best of the time I ha-have left with the family I love...” Lesley reached for Jessie's hand in spite of the pain and from how weak she started to become.
" Lesley I am gonna be there when you need me to be but what you're asking me to do, you're asking me to say goodbye to you and I can't promise that I would be able to handle that especially.... Especially when you're the only closest one to being the daughter I have left..." Jessie had to take a moment to collect herself and calm down
Now Lesley had reached for Jessie's hand again “ Jessie... I'm gonna put up a fight you know I won't give up without a good fight...”
Lesley layed down to rest on the couch shortly before Rick had gotten home but Jessie made no effort to get ready to go home after the recent conversation with Lesley and what Lesley admitted of what she wanted to do.
" How is she feeling?" Rick asked quietly
" She seems to be okay... I gave her anti nausea medication and I gave her some pain medication." Jessie replied
" Jessie Lesley will be okay I will see to it" Rick gave Jessie a hug and helped her get her coat before she left to head home.
After Jessie headed home for the night, Rick carried Lesley carefully up to bed so she could sleep easily but made no effort to leave her side for the rest of the night.
Over the following week Lesley and Jessie were waiting for her to be seen by Dr Richards as usual and than later in for her treatment even though she knew Rick still doesn't know what's going on
" Jessie i'm okay.... Could you maybe find out from Claudia if she would like to meet us for lunch...?" Lesley turned towards Jessie
" Sure... Should I ask Rick if he would like to join?" Jessie replied
" No I think it should be a girl's time out later though I think it's time that I tell him about..." Lesley started and stopped..
" I'm proud of you Lesley because I know it's gonna be the hardest thing that you will have to tell him... Just like it's the hardest thing as a mother to see you have to go through this.." Jessie hugged Lesley before stepping out to make a few calls.
Lesley and Jessie sat in with Dr. Richards during her appointment as usual before eventually Jessie was to take Lesley home.
" The Consulting Oncology Specialist is gonna want to evaluate within the next week or so to determine whether you can continue Chemo and radiation. So far it seems to be responding however, based on the aggression is where it will be determined on whether treatment would no longer be an option for you." Dr Richards explained
" You said that I'm responding to the Chemo, wouldn't that mean that treatment could still work?" Lesley asked
" Theoretically speaking we would like to think so but in your case and where the masses are located, Lesley we can't operate to remove anything even if we were to have detected this at stage 1 or 2 I wouldn't be able to operate because of the location. I'm sorry Lesley."
" But doing the radiation and the Chemotherapy, that is responsive and it's working." Lesley said
" For the time being, yes you have started to respond with the Chemo."
"And what does that mean" Jessie spoke up.
Dr Richards explained the whole situation without leaving any detail of Lesley's case and what it boiled down to as from the beginning that he had told her that she was in fact terminal this time and treatment was not gonna be successful this time.
“ Please… I don't want to give up until I get the chance to break my husband's heart. Jerry please I have to tell him before we stop treatment.”
~~~
Rick had just finished in the O.R when he ran into Steve and Audrey up in the ICU for a brief period.
" Hi Rick... How's Lesley..?" Steve asked
" She seems to be doing better but sometimes I feel that she's been holding back on something she wants to tell me but can't seem to be able to say it... And what bothers me more is it could have something to do medically rather than emotionally." Rick replied
" Oh why do you say that?" Audrey asked alittle confused
" Because the other day she was frantic about me not setting an appointment with Dr Richards again.." Rick said
" Are you worried that the cancer maybe has come back?" Steve asked carefully
" Steve I don't know what to think or do I just wish she would come to me and open up about what's wrong."
Lesley tried her best to wait up for Rick when he was to be home but as soon as she got home from the hospital, Jessie immediately saw just how tired and weak Lesley started to become and had made her go lay down.
" Jessie.... I got home as soon as you called... Is Lesley alright?"
" She's hanging in there. I've been watching her fever on and off so far it hasn't been real high but she's been okay for the most part...." Jessie answered.
Rick went up to see if Lesley wanted anything but was concerned with how pale and lethargic Lesley had become
" Jess... I'm gonna take her to the hospital. She's hardly breathing and she might have developed an infection."
Jessie didn't hesitate to call for an ambulance and then moved to try to get Lesley to wake up
" Lesley it's Jessie I need you to wake up... Come on Lesley please wake up"
Rick carried Lesley carefully out just in time for the ambulance when it had gotten to the house " Lesley Webber she's 47, respiration is very low BP is 56/40.. possible infection temperature is up 104."
" Is the patient on any medications or allergic to anything?"
" She's on anti-rejection medication. She's a transplant patient and she's also a cancer patient but has been in remission.."
Rick rode with Lesley in the ambulance as Jessie followed hoping that Lesley was gonna be okay but as Jessie followed by car she knew the truth all along with the situation and the fact remained Lesley's condition wasn't good.
“ Lesley you hang in there and you fight like hell don’t you leave me.” Rick said in her ear but stayed by her side up until they made it to General Hospital and Steve asked for him to stay in the waiting area.
Noah and Steve looked thoroughly through her recent blood workup and scans which was done earlier in the week when she had her last appointment in with Dr. Richards. “ Steve right there… We should page Dr. Richards. Find out what's the best way to treat this if it’s treatable.”
“ We need to get her temperature down first, before Lesley gets any worse. I’ll step out and talk to Rick and Jessie.” Steve answered while Noah was starting a full workup again to confirm his suspicions.
Jessie stood up while Rick tried to go get some air “ Steve what is it….. I know that look and it isn’t good so just tell me straight.” Jessie said straightforwards at steve
“ Lesley had a seizure shortly going into the exam area…” Steve started “ You mean it could have spread now to the brain?” Jessie spoke up
“ Lesley’s cancer is back?” Steve asked stunned as he wasn’t aware that Lesley was diagnosed a third time and was then told that time that treatment wasn’t gonna do much of anything.
“ Jerry confirmed that the last time she had her pet scans, He thought that we had gotten it all before when she had appeared to be in remission but it wasn’t caught until it…… until it was too late to be able to consider to do anything about it.” Jessie explained to Steve just as Rick was about to come back. “ Steve one more thing before Rick comes in, Lesley doesn’t want him to know anything about it… until she can try to tell him herself that she's terminal.”