SHIP: beomkai (beomgyu & kai)
CONTAINS: self harm / cutting / infected wounds
start:
"beomgyu go get hyucka so we can go already" Yeonjun complained as he finished putting on his shoes
"okay hyung geez" Beomgyu groaned walking out of the living room and to kais room knocking on the door "hyucka hurry up yeonjun wont stop bitching" he yelled
there was quite shuffling before a shaky "okay im coming" came from the room, Kai opened the door shoving his hands in his pockets before following beomgyu towards the door
"finally lets go im starving" Yeonjun said overdramaticlly
"calm down babe, are you three ready?" Taehyun asked grabbing yeonjuns hand and opening the door
"yea" "finally" Beomgyu and Soobin said
together as they walked out behind taejun
Kai walked out last and followed his hyungs down the road to where they were going to eat
Once they all ordered everyone began to dig in, minus kai, dont get him wrong he was hungry the food just didnt seem as apetizing as it usually was
"are you gonna eat those?" yeonjun asked pointing at the youngers fries, Kai shook his head and pushed his plate towards the oldest who gratefully began to eat the fatty food
"hyucka why arent you eating isnt this like your favorite place?" soobin asked, getting no response before speaking again "are you not hungry?"
"yeah....." Kai looked down embarrassed
"okay make sure you eat something later" Soobin smiled, the younger nodded in reply before standing up
"im gonna go to the bathroom" he said hurriedly before walking away
Once Kai entered the bathroom he turned on the sink and pulled up his sleeves, blood from earlier sticking to the fabric making the process painful, he pushed that aside and quickly rinsed his arms off before patting the areas with paper towels and rolling his sleeves back down before exiting.
"hey hyucka were about to leave do you wanna order anything to go?" taehyun asked
"uhm... no im fine" Kai practically whispered
The five boys soon returned to their dormitory
"im gonna go take a nap" Kai said before he returned to his room
about 3 hours later Kai was still asleep while the other 4 were planning on going to do something
"one of us should stay to make sure hyuckas okay, im worried about him" Taehyun said while they were planning what to do
"should we draw straws or play rock paper scissors" Yeonjun asked
They eventually ended up playing rps and Beomgyu ultimately lost, meaning he had to stay with HueningKai
around 2 hours later Beomgyu was bored off
his ass and decided to check on the younger
"hyucka" he quietly knocked on the door
"y-yes" he answered shakily from the other side
"can i come in im bored" he pouted doing voice aegyo
"n-not right now hyung im n-not feeling w-well" kai lied
"ugh i dont care come on pleaseee" Beomgyu persisted
"fine give me a s-sec" Kai said walking away from the door, Beomgyu barged in since it wasn't locked only to see Kai putting a pencil sharpener blade back in its place with his sleeves rolled up, his arms littered in cuts, blood oozing out of them.
"kai... i-i"
"GET OUT" kai screamed letting out a broken sob as he fell onto his knees
"kai please"
"GET THE FUCK OUT" he screamed again throwing the nearest thing, a notebook, at Beomgyu
Beomgyu hurriedly exited the room
around 30 minutes later he carefully knocked on Kais door "hyucka please let me in" He asked more than said
Kai slowly opened the door and allowed the older to enter
"kai.... do you wanna talk about earlier?" Beomgyu carefully asked
"i-if you think we should..." he mumbled
"how long have you been cutting"
"since trainee days but i stopped and started again last month"
"do you only cut your arms?"
"usually i-ive tried cutting my throat before though, b-but i couldnt do it i chickened out"
"do you clean your cuts after?"
"n-no"
"hyucka.... do you know whatll happen if they get infected"
"n-no wh-what"
"okay..... dont tell anyone about this" Beomgyu took a deep breath before removing his shorts and revealing a long cut around his thigh, it was swollen and purple with some green brown and red spots "i didnt clean my cuts either and this happened, now i have to wear longer shorts all the time"
"beomgyu h-hyung y-you"
"yea i know shocking right im the mood maker whose always happy and chaotic when really im this" Beomgyu looked down disappointed in himself
"h-how do i clean them" Kai asked
"just alcohol" Beomgyu said
"hyung... can you maybe not tell anyone about this"
"of course kai, but next time you cut i want you to come to me so i can help you clean them, and please i know its hard but try to quit"
"i-ill try" Kai whispered
a couple days passed by and not much changed, it was currently 2:30 in the morning and Kai begrudgingly kept his promise and silently snuck his way to Beomgyus room, when he opened the door however he saw the older doing the same exact thing he had just finished
beomgyu was cutting himself
and it was really fucking bloody
"b-beom"
"fuck! oh h-hey kai"
"hyung.... what the hell"
"im sorry i know i told you to stop but its just hard i needed to feel something other than constantly be numb" Beomgyu began sobbing
"shshshh its okay hyungie i know, lets go get cleaned up though okay?"
"m'kay" beomgyu said as he hung his head in shame
"here since its all over your thighs and such take a bath to wash first then we can use the alcohol wipes" Kai instructed as he turned on the water
"c-can you turn around"
"of course beom" Kai said quickly facing the other way and waiting for the others signal before turning around again,
Kai bent down by the bathtub and lifted one of Beomgyus legs, carefully pouring water over it before grabbing the closest antibacterial soap and rubbing it onto the area
"it stings" Beomgyu winced
"i know just relax okay?"
Beomgyu nodded as Kai rinsed the soap off and began to wash the other leg, once Beomgyu was done Kai helped him out and propped the older up onto the counter grabbing the first aid kit and getting out the alcohol wipes
Kai carefully cleaned the open wounds before letting Beomgyu down
"here let me help with yours" the older whispered as he grabbed a wipe and carefully cleaned the youngers cuts
once the two were done they returned to Beomgyus room
"beom-"
beomgyu quickly cut the younger off by pressing their lips together "im sorry i couldnt be the strong one thank you for helping me kai" he pecked the younger again
"i-its n-nothing hyung"
"if you say so.... can you come cuddle with me though" Beomgyu pouted
Kai hurriedly layed down next to the older and wrapped his arms around his hyungs small frame
"nightnight hyucka" Beomgyu said softly
"goodnight hyung" Kai said bac
a couple hours later Beomgyu woke up to Kai moving around and crying in his sleep, the older carefully began to shake the taller awake
"hyucka... wake up bubs" He said soothingly
"mmmh what" Kai said groggily
"were you having a bad dream?"
"yea" the younger looked down
"its okay kai i still have bad dreams too"
"oh... im scared hyung"
"why? whats wrong baby?"
"what'll happen if the others or someone else found out.... what if they think were disgusting" Kai began to quietly cry
"its okay love no ones gonna find out hyung will make sure of it" Beomgyu reassured
uh so yea another short angst chapter because i didnt know how to finish the smuts im writing