TRIGGER WARNINGS:
EXPLICIT LANGUAGE
SWEARING
SMOKING/ALCOHOL
I was dreaming. About Lira walking down the aisle. Seeing her dressed in white. I was dreaming about her laughing, her dark hair flowing behind her as she ran to me. She grabbed my hands and I felt my knees go weak. My arms were like jelly and the smile I had on was so fucking wide it was unrealistic. I was dreaming beautifully. It was like magic.
Until my body was hit with freezing cold water and chunks of ice. I gasped and shot upright in my soaking wet bed, the water chilling me. Raf was standing over me, a wide grin on his face and a bucket in his hands. "You mother fucking dipshit." I growled wiping my face with my hands. He only laughed and tossed the bucket aside. I heard my dad laughing, he too being in the room.
I glared at Raf but he was too busy now going through my wardrobe. "We have approximately five hours to get drunk because Enzo, you're not getting married without going to a club as a single man." He grinned trudging back to me with a shirt and trousers in his hands. I stared at Dad, my shoulders slumping. Instead of protesting which wouldn't work, I showered and changed.
When I walked into the living room, I saw everyone staring at me. Uncle Kaden, dad, uncle Mariano, Ramsay, Admir, Asim. Esad was also here as well as some of my friends. Raf grinned walking up to me, placing his arm around my shoulder. "Tonight my brother is a free man so let's get out there and get fucking drunk. Let's give him a send off." Raf grinned before ruffling my hair. I shook him off me.
We all drove in four different cars to a club. Women, alcohol, smoking and a shit ton of fun was about to go down. I was well aware that Asim was with us. I know that Lira would protest to him being here with us but he was stolen of a childhood, so he knew about many things already. And besides, Admir was here to keep an eye on the boy.
The club almost fell silent with most faces turning to us, their eyes dragging, assessing us. It would be more fun if Lira was here. She was phenomenal. I missed her a great deal. A whole week of not seeing her, touching her, kissing her, it made me want her more.
Some days I am busy with work or I've gone out for business so I hardly see her but I would always sleep in the same bed as her when night fell. My bed was now full with her in it. When I do see her, it will be tomorrow when she does walk down the aisle towards me. To forever be mine. No matter how much she loves me, I love her more. She was perfect for me in every way. She knew the mafia. She wasn't afraid to get her hands dirty. She commanded respect and knew how to survive. She would never be my downfall but my greatest strength.
She never wanted more of me, never expected more. If I went away for business, she understood. She never questioned my motives but she did challenge me a great deal. And I needed that. Someone rational to listen to. Someone whom I fully trusted to help me. My mafias took a lot out of me but in the time that I've known her, she's helped me. She's helped my family. She saved Isabella, throwing herself in front of a bullet to save her. She saved Emily for Mara. There's nothing she wouldn't do for my family, our family.
I want to one day give her the family she's always wanted. I've never voiced it to her but sometimes I thought about our future. Our children. Because she wanted a family and she would make a great mom. I wanted children too and not just to rule my mafia, but because they would be like Isabella. Small, inquisitive and annoying.
I turned to look at dad who was smiling. He smiled a lot more. Maybe he was happy. I knew he was happy for me. It must be elating for him and especially because he loved Lira. We have been out a couple of times with just dad, and I know he likes her a lot. He sees what I see. A strong, capable woman. The fact that I was getting married so young was a bit odd for dad and mom to understand but they know how much I love Lira. They were happy for me and I was happy for that. Their blessing meant the world to me.
Everyone got seated into a booth, the clubs loud music blared and drinks were everywhere. Strobe lights flickered around, the atmosphere being rowdy and boisterous. Glasses clinked when drinks were poured. Whiskey, vodka, cocktails, spirits. Shot after shot. Drink after drink.
Raf sat twirling the little pink umbrella in his orange vodka cocktail. He had far too much to drink but he didn't seem out of it just yet. Dad was laughing with Admir and Ramsay as they smoked and drank, more moderately than Raf and I. Uncle Kaden and uncle Mariano were drinking at the bar, with uncle Mariano flirting with the brunette bartender.
"Here. This was hard to source but I managed it." Esad flashed a smile, holding onto a bottle of alcohol. The clean shaven man took a seat beside me and began to twist the lid of the Rakija, a traditional Albanian spirit. He poured out several shots of the apricot based liquid and we all picked up a glass, clinking them together. "To Enzo and Lira..may you both live happy lives." Esad toasted. We all knocked back the drinks and by now I couldn't feel the burning down my throat but I could taste the sweet apricot.
Two hours later, Raf was off talking to a girl and so were most of my friends. I was still in the booth relaxed back, sipping on my drink, watching everyone act like idiots. It was nice. They all wanted to give me a send off even though I wasn't going anywhere. I was only getting married. A big - no a huge deal in itself.
I turned to my left to see Asim who slumped down beside me. He was the only one not drinking of course but he seemed to be enjoying himself. He sipped on his lemonade, the lemon and lime slices inside clashing with the ice cubes. "You ever want a girlfriend Asim?" I asked with a coy smile. This was definitely the drink talking.
He turned to face me with a grin. "Nah girls are annoying." He scoffed before taking another sip of his drink. "Good answer. You know I had my first girlfriend when I was sixteen. She was nice but she wasn't Lira." I sighed. No girl compares to her. I don't know what I was searching for when I was younger but it was her. Now I knew it was her.
Asim let out an amused breath of air or maybe a scoff, I couldn't tell. My back wasn't straight against the booth anymore, I was leaning. "I don't think I want a girlfriend." He ruffled his hair and looked around the club. "Yeah I used to say that. But then you'd be missing out on all the sex." I blurted before slapping a hand onto my mouth. What the fuck was that?
Asim laughed, not half heartily, but a real massive laugh. I laughed, feeling embarrassed more so. Thankfully no one was here witness to what I had just said. When he was done laughing, he grinned looking at me and at the table which was clustered full of half empty glasses. "Shit sorry Asim. I shouldn't have said that. I forget you're twelve." I muttered an apology. He shook his head. "Don't worry about it. And I won't tell anyone." He grinned widely.
It was nice that he trusted me. His brother in law and in some ways, I think he found comfort in talking about certain topics with me that he couldn't with Lira and Admir. Although I'm sure they both would listen and advise.
I felt a hand snake down my chest and suddenly the drinks in my stomach turned to lead. Manicured nails ran down my shirt and a voice spoke out. "Hey gorgeous, want some company?" The girl spoke before settling into the booth beside me. Another girl settled beside Asim. I stiffened and pulled away so that she removed her hand and she did.
"We don't want any company thank you." Asim said loudly, above the music. The girl beside him, her dark hair in a long whip like plait, chuckled. "Oh sweetie, everyone needs company." She purred affectionately. My eyes strained, my hands getting clammy. I'm fucking drunk. I tried to tell them to leave but my voice came out jumbled. Shit.
The girl beside Asim tried to wrap her arm around him but he stopped her. "I'm a literal child and he's getting married tomorrow. Fuck off." He stared at them with that unnerving coldness that could scare any grown man. He's got it. That look, that tone, that would make him into somebody who would be respected and feared in a mafia. I could see it.
I nodded at him appreciatively when both women left us alone. The boy smiled and then began to ask me questions about what it felt like to have sex and I told him. The words just slipped from my lips, my own mind betraying me. I was happy and that was also fogging my mind. 'He is twelve' I had to keep repeating that every time I tried to speak to him like he was Raf.
"Admir is going to give a little speech at the wedding. He asked me if I wanted to but I don't know what to say. I don't know Lira like he does." Asim sighed after a while and stirred the straw of his forth lemonade. I was also sipping a lemonade, trying to fight off my hangover before it began. "You do know her and anything you say could..make her happy. Why don't you talk about how you feel..being with her and Admir. I don't know." I stumbled over my words. He nodded and said something about going to the men's room.
"Enzo." Dad spoke up breaking my daze. He sat down into the booth beside me, crossing his legs, cigarette in between his fingers. He looked at my disheveled state but didn't comment on it. "When I got married, it was rushed. I didn't have a party, not like this and I doubted I would have had one. It was different you know. I was told I would be marrying your mom and that's it. I wasn't happy about it, not at all. It was like I was giving up my freedom." He spoke before I interrupted him.
"But you weren't." I sighed. He inhaled his cigarette and blew out a breath. "No but it felt like it at the time. In the mafia, a man is expected to have a docile quiet wife. He's supposed to control her and your mom, well she's too strong to be just my wife so we worked it out. And she is the greatest thing to ever happen to me, just like you are." He sighed softly, looking at me. "I can't believe you're getting married tomorrow, seems like just yesterday that you were born. I remember just holding you. Your mom was asleep at the time and I just stared at you. You're my world Enzo, I hope you know that."
I felt my cheeks heat up and my eyes brim with tears. A single tear rolled down my cheek. "You know you're my world too dad." I smiled. There was so much more I could say but dad and I didn't need words to communicate, we just knew.
It was a while later that we were all seated on a private plane heading home to America. Everyone was in various stages of drunkness or being hungover. Dad was the responsible one, having handed out water bottles to everyone. Across from me sat Raf, asleep. Asim was beside me, with Admir being opposite him.
I tapped my phone screen, looking at Lira's picture. I will have to change it to one where she's in her wedding dress. I looked up to see Admir smiling softly at me. "You nervous?" He asked. I shrugged my shoulders. "Yes and no." I replied and he gave me a look which meant I had to explain myself.
"I'm not nervous in the sense that I love her and I know it will be the best day of my life. I'm just nervous because the day has finally arrived." I gulped feeling my stomach flip wildly. She still makes me nervous and I wouldn't have it any other way.
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I just love how whipped (as everyone says) Enzo is. As much as I tried to create a cold hearted man, he's just too cute. #sorrynotsorry
Fun fact: There's a national walnut day on May 17th and a walnut tree can live up to 250 years. 🌳