the sunset is one of the many breathtaking things in this world. the array of colors that fill up the sky. and with one look, you wish to look like those colors. because everyone seems to let a smile paint over their face while looking at it.
but what about the moon and the forever ending darkness that surrounds it? the small specs of light that fill up the sky like decorations. and the moon in the center of everything.
the sunset has always been beautiful,
but i prefer the stars.
✧༺ ༻∞ ∞༺ ༻✧
the clouds cast over the city and the white color was washed away. dark heavy clouds filled the sky showing how easily the sun could be put to sleep. not a single ray of light shined through. with a few drops, the rain began to pick up as thunder ricocheted across the sky shaking everything below it. objects rattled against the sky as lightning struck down in a pattern. with one strike it would expand it's lines letting them travel further.
not a single breeze passed through making everything to be hot and sticky. it felt like you were sweating but it stuck to your skin not moving. it was an unconformable feeling.
picking up your pace you lightly jogged to the school's entrance. by clicking a button on your key fob you made sure your car locked. glancing down at your phone you checked the time seeing you had somehow made it to school thirty minutes early.
running up to the doors you open them stepping inside. a gush of air ran towards you as it washed away that humid feeling. it replenished your body and you softly smiled at the coldness. it glided down your skin onto your clothes shaking off the stickiness.
deciding on where to go you chose the cafeteria. you could find most of the group there and you had to tell them something. especially mikasa and armin. your stomach turned at the thought. it ached as your heart started to race. your limbs felt shaky and with creased brows, you recognized the feeling. it screamed at you like a second thought.
a gut feeling. the intuition that something had gone wrong. something horrible.
letting your tongue glide against your lips you found yourself staring at the floor trying to regain your thoughts.
taking it as you were being dramatic you took a step forward only to be stopped by a voice. she was stern with her words and the attitude that leaked from her mouth made you halt in place.
"did you do it?"
turning on your heel you faced the female. her hair sat on her shoulders and her outfit was plain. raising a brow you questioned her "did i do what?" with a sigh, she looked away from you. her mind was on the fence and she couldn't help but question everything you had done. her voice wavered showing she wasn't completely sure with what she was saying "what you did to him."
giving hitch an odd look you shifted your weight onto your left leg "what are you talking about?"
her brows furrowed as her grip tightened around the device that sat in her hand "you don't know?"
"why would i be asking if i did?" you replied with a dumbfounded look.
slightly nodding her head she realized it was a stupid question. looking around the foyer she grabbed onto your arm giving it a small tug "follow me." you had no choice as she dragged you down the hall avoiding everyone in the hall. taking sharp turns she looked at the ground following the lines in all the tiles. arriving at a classroom door she pushed down on the handle.
entering the room she quickly turned around to face you "so you don't know?" slithering your arm out of her hold you shook your head. with parted lips, she nervously swallowed unsure if she wanted to show you. how would you react?
quickly lifting her phone she unlocked it shoving it in your direction. with a heavy breath, she spoke "can you please explain."
tilting your head back you squinted your eyes at how close the device was. taking it from her hands you opened the message. hovering your thumb over the black screen you pressed play. the video lagged for a second as it buffered before skipping to a short clip. you sat in an empty office with two windows behind you. the gray curtains were drawn and your fingers typing against the keyboard filled the room up.
a pink usb drive was placed into the computer and you sat contently in the black office chair. your eyes trained on the screen. the video ended and you clicked out of it to read over the message along with another picture. and you froze.
for the first time, you were left speechless. you couldn't utter a word as you kept reading over the same sentence. could this be classified as your fault? sure you left the usb drive but why would you take it if it was never yours? but why didn't you take it? if you had seen what was on it why didn't you take it so cora couldn't use it?
you should have taken hesitation up on the offer.
you should have done a lot of things and now you are starting to come to terms with that. there were different ways that you could have handled that situation and of course, you picked the wrong one.
too caught up in revenge you didn't think about what could happen. because now everything you had done was ruined. your secret was revealed.
your mind went blank reading over the last sentence.
eren.
furrowing your brows you dropped your arm to the side. there was no coming back from this one. all the odds were against you, but you didn't understand why you cared so much. your whole plan was to fuck up this school and then leave. you wanted everyone to know it was you as you walked out that door to go back to marley. so why do you feel such defeat?
the friendships you had made, made an impact on you. as much as you don't want to admit it, you liked them. sasha and connie were always by your side to whisper jokes in your ear. no matter what they followed you around like lost puppies. they loved to annoy you and they loved it more when you joined in on their rude remarks. sasha begged you every day to share your lunch. and each day you would count in your head how long it took for you to give in and slide your bag over to her.
every day it was the same. fifty seconds.
connie always seemed to ask stupid questions that made you rethink your own choices. his funny jokes or protests to what the right answer in math was, always made you smile. the small arguments he would start with you and armin yelling that since his name started with a 'c' the answer just had to be 'c'. and after a while, you got tired of it soon falling into his trick and circling the wrong answer.
the blonde who always watched you from afar was a great addition to your daily life. throughout the day he would always text you recommending new books you should read. it didn't matter what time it was. it could be five in the morning and he was ready to give you a summary of the book explaining how he loved it or how he wanted to burn it. his ideas were always smart and that's why in a lot of your classes you partnered up with him. it was especially funny having to watch eren and connie work together.
mikasa had always been skeptical about you and that's what you loved. the two of you could glare at each other in a class all day but as soon as she would ask you for a favor you were all in. you'd help the female out with anything even if it meant having to talk to jean, trying to get him to stop messaging her. and when she asked to grab the coffee you had to say yes. just so you two could fool around in the cafe talking about pointless things.
ymir was your all-time favorite. each time in second period she sat down beside you telling you how last week she vandalized a train. or how she and connie egged histoira's house. and repaying her for the funny stories you would hand her your paper so she could copy off of you. which she thanked you every day for because she was now passing that class with flying colors.
eren.
he was different than the rest. no matter how hard you tried to hate him you couldn't. there was something about him that pulled you in like a fish to a hook. and once you got to know him you couldn't help but want to learn everything about him. at first, he was just someone you sat by in tyburs class. but he gave you a weird feeling and there was no denying how you liked it.
it was tough to come by, but you enjoyed every second of him. going to his house to bother him became a normal daily thing.
and now you knew it was coming to an end. it took some time to accept but you could confidently say you liked him.
but you weren't going to give up that easily. to just walk away from them, especially him. that would be stupid. you would be letting her win.
everything was stacked against you, and the chances were low. but just maybe they would believe you after what you had done. there was a lot to hate you for. but you weren't going to stand there and be hated for something you didn't even do. just a second more is all you asked for. just a minute more to be joking around with everyone or to be held in his arms.
extending your arm you handed hitch her phone. you were thankful she showed you the video but that didn't mean she wasn't upset with you. taking the phone out of your hand she creased her brows scanning over your face "you seem surprised."
looking over at the clock that was nailed to the wall you counted down on how much time you had "that's because i am." with a sigh you let your eyes fall back onto the female. she brought her hands up fiddling with them "you didn't do it."
giving her an airy laugh you nodded your head "and what makes you think that?"
"you seem like you had no idea what's going on. i'm on the fence about you, i'm not sure if i like you or not. but i can still believe that there's good in you." she softly spoke taking a step back. turning her head she grabbed onto the door handle yanking it open "before you walked in, i saw eren walking to tyburs class."
taking in a deep breath you let it stagger out "why are you helping me?"
smiling she lifted her hand to point at the door she held open "you can explain everything to me later. now go, if you keep standing here then who knows where he'll be next." grabbing onto the door handle harder she opened the door wider.
stepping forward you took a couple of steps before looking back at her. your brows were still furrowed and you gave her a smile "thank you hitch."
laughing she nodded her head while gently hitting you with the door "go!"
giving her one last glance you moved your feet walking out the door. turning to the right you sighed passing by students. their eyes locked onto your figure inspecting every inch. their brows creased in disgust and they couldn't help but judge how you walked. everything about you was awful.
you didn't spare them a glance, why would you? within a snap of your fingers, you could have the whole school turn on them. secrets are powerful. if you think you could spill them and say "don't tell anyone!" then you might be stupid.
your secrets become everyone's secrets as the person you trusted told their friends. and it continues that way until finally, someone speaks a little too loud. secrets are better kept to yourself. to reveal things could go either way. it all comes down to if it's good or bad. is it something so horrible or just a silly thing you did?
that's why you stuck to lies. you could make someone like you just by a couple of false sentences. you got to control who liked you and who didn't. just by copying someone's interests, you could become their friend. it's that easy.
too easy, to the point it was something that became second nature for you. but it paid off in different ways.
stepping up your pace you turned a corner running into a small group of people. creasing your brows you took a couple of steps back trying to create some distance.
looking at the two, you were met with a blonde who had a new book in his hand. the cover was deep red with gold lining all around. right next to him stood a female. her right hand was wrapped around her phone as she stared down at it, oblivious to the fact she almost ran into someone.
armin quickly stopped himself and reached his arm out to grab onto mikasa's shoulder. softly pulling her back she looked up confused about why they were stopping. dropping her arm down she turned her head to the side and let her sights fall onto you. her mouth quickly closed as she slipped her phone into her jeans pocket.
cocking her head to the side she smiled "i'm glad i ran into you, we need to have a conversation."
trying to explain this situation was going to be hard. it would take a miracle for someone to even believe you. and it didn't help that you were a liar.
nodding your head you spoke "i was just about to say that." scoffing she raised her right hand, swinging it around "really. what do you need to talk to me about?"
"i want to explain-"
not wanting to hear the rest of your sentence she took a step forward pointing at you "explain?! I think you've done enough explaining with the shit you just pulled! i thought we had a promise we agreed on, y/n."
raising a brow you tried to reason with her "did i not keep that promise? i was the first one to snap back at cora for sending eren that video. what did you do?"
shoving her finger into your shoulder she pushed it harshly, making you step back "who cares what you did. you ruined it the second you released that about my brother!" shaking her head she pushed you back again "i trusted you y/n. i did! but that was all a part of your plan wasn't it?"
your lips parted to correct her but she was quick to speak again "the plan was to come in here make friends with everyone then turn around and stab them in the back. you are the definition of pathetic! you-"
armin furrowed his brows looking between you two. setting a hand on mikasa's shoulder he interrupted her rant "i think we should hear her speak."
the raven-haired girl whipped her head to face the male "excuse me?"
sighing the blonde nodded his head over to you "we should hear y/n out." slapping his hand off of her shoulder she pursed her lips "for what? so she can feed us more lies and we can believe them?!"
seeing as the female was starting to get defensive he took a step back putting his hands up, trying to show he meant no harm "mikasa that's not what i'm saying-"
"that's exactly what's you're saying!" swallowing she turned away from him to look at you "this will be your final warning. stay away from eren." not giving you or armin another glance she walked off. she ignored the male's shouts as he pleaded for mikasa to stay for a couple more seconds.
clicking your tongue you watched mikasa walk off. her figure getting further with each step. and with each step she took, you let your body fall in defeat. things just got a lot harder. lifting your hand you ran it through your hair. "i know you didn't do it."
furrowing your brows you looked over at Armin. he stood still and his fingers picked at the book that sat in his hands. nodding his head he shifted his gaze over to where mikasa once was "nothing adds up. plus you don't do things that messily."
letting out a breath you smiled "thank you."
looking over at you he returned the smile before walking off to catch up with mikasa. he placed the book under his armpit holding it against his body while grabbing onto his phone. his thumbs nervously tapped on the screen while he sucked in his lower lip chewing on it.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
the one thing you could hope for is that eren would be in tyburs classroom waiting behind the door. you could only hope he didn't go home or decided to skip the class. but if you were put into his situation you would make it your number one goal to avoid you.
your hand clasped around the door handle just like every day. only this time you wouldn't be walking into the class to see your friends smiling at you, and waving you over so they could tell you something stupid. this time you had to defend yourself.
pushing down on the handle you listened as the door clicked open and you pushed it forward. stepping in, you let the sound of your shoes hitting the ground echo in the classroom.
you walked into the middle of the room and turned your head to the left. looking over you scanned the desks. a figure sat in one of the seats as he rested his head on the palm of his hand. his eyes left the floor and he let them travel up your body stopping at your face.
smiling he let out a small yawn before speaking "well look what we have here."
blue jeans were placed on his legs and a brown belt held them up. a plain white shirt sat on his torso and his so-called beard was just stubble. his ashy hair was well styled.
giving you a dirty look he let out a dramatic sigh "this is great." momentarily stopping he lifted his hand to point at himself then you "well it's great for me, not you."
setting both of his hands on top of the desk he smirked looking at the seat next to him "you must be wondering where eren is." giving you a side glance he beamed at the words spilling from his mouth "i told him you were on your way over here, and he happily left the room."
crossing your arms you shifted your weight to your left leg "what are you trying to get at jean?"
"isn't it simple? he doesn't want to talk to you. i was just helping the guy out. i mean what you did cross the line don't ya think?"
"i have to ask, where is this sudden burst of confidence coming from?" you questioned.
shrugging his shoulders the male leaned back into the seat "how does it feel being beat by cora?" raising a brow you let out a small laugh "you think Cora beat me?"
turning his head to the side he slowly nodded his head "didn't she? i mean look at the predicament you're in."
taking a couple of steps forward you walked in between the desks. sticking your arm out you let your pointer finger run across the metal surfaces. your eyes latched onto your finger watching your skin glide over drawling and engraved symbols that were placed on the desk. "who do you think made cora?"
stopping your movements you stood still, letting the palm of your hand rest on the desk "i did."
turning to the left you walked down a row of desks "if I was the one who gave cora information and i taught her how to do things, do you think she could outdo me?" stopping in front of the male you let out a laugh shaking your head "of course she could! that's what you said right?"
setting your hands on the desk you leaned down to look him right in the eye "cora is a walking failure, someone who isn't capable of knowing right from left. but if you must disagree i would love to know your thoughts." rocking your body forward you inched closer to his face "i'm dying to know how i could up my game and beat her." tilting your head to the side you smiled "so tell me since you have all the answers."
the male slide further down his chair as your gaze was stuck on him like glue. nervously swallowing he adverted his eyes to the side not being able to have direct eye contact with you. his lips parted and inaudible words left his mouth. sucking in a breath he closed his lips giving you a small glance. seeing that you didn't hear him he quickly spoke "you're right. cora isn't good at doing things smoothly."
pushing yourself back up you cocked a brow up "are you sure? you had a lot to say earlier."
nodding his head he looked down at the ground "sorry, i didn't mean it."
letting out a hum you walked over to your seat. placing your bag on the floor you sat down next to jean. getting comfortable you crossed your legs waiting for the rest of the class to arrive. your eyes stayed on the classroom door waiting for him to walk in.
each time the doorknob rattled you snapped your head over, but it was just a random student. never once did he or anyone from the friend group step in the room.
the tardy bell soon rang and you looked around the classroom, maybe you had just missed the male walking in. but you didn't, your eyes had been glued to the door.
jean sat in his seat and only looked up once. histoira and cora sat in the corner of the room. the brunette raised her hand offering him a smile while waving her hand in the air. she signaled for him to come over and that's when historia patted a seat next to her.
swallowing he looked at cora shaking his head before dropping it back down to the ground.
you could never understand why jean seemed to never learn his lesson. but maybe this was the last time you had to snap back at him. the last time you could even taunt him.
the last time for everything.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
the class was dismissed as mrs.tybur sat down in her black office chair. she rolled over to her desk trying to gather all the scattered papers that layed on top of her desk. once they were all collected she placed a paper clip on the stack to keep them together.
movement was heard as she listened to the feet of her students leaving the class. they stomped on the ground zipping up backpacks and talking loudly trying to catch someone's attention. looking up she creased her brows while clearing her throat "y/n class has been dismissed."
hearing a voice speak you turned your head to look over at the brunette. her hands were clasped together and sat on top of a stack of plain papers. the classroom became emptier with each second as people walked out trudging to their next class.
getting up from your seat you grabbed onto your bag. pursing your lips you smiled at her "sorry, i didn't notice."
returning the smile tybur dropped her head back down. she continued to organize her desk placing things into the correct order.
taking that as her response you walked out of the classroom and searched through your pockets for your phone.
finding it you typed in the 6-digit passcode and scrolled through your contact list. running your thumb down the screen you searched for her name. while walking through the hall you occasionally glanced up not wanting to run into anyone. you also decided to skip your second-period class to make this call.
clicking onto the familiar name you dropped your hand to the side. taking a left you jogged up to the bathrooms pushing the door open and finally letting out a breath. but as you did, you were met with a female.
her bag was laying on the counter right next to the sink. a crumpled brown paper towel sat in her hand with wet spots all around. her hair was messily tied up in a ponytail. hairs were misplaced and the glob of hair started to slide down making the hair tie loose. her eyes were puffy which hid her red eyes. dried tears were on her cheeks and when she blinked a couple of water drops slid down her skin.
sucking in the breath you had just released you furrowed your brows unsure of what to say.
sasha frantically grabbed her bag off the counter tossing it onto her shoulder. she looked away from you as she kept her gaze on the floor. your lips parted to spill a gallon of words but she was quick to leave.
she walked out and let the door slam behind her. You turned around raising your hand to swing it open to chase after her, but you stood still. looking down you clicked onto a button letting the ringing fill up the silence. you walked further into the bathroom waiting for the line to connect.
stopping in front of the white smooth sink you looked up to inspect yourself in the mirror. staring at your reflection the phone finally stopped ringing "tell me everything."
placing your free hand on the black countertop you let out an airy laugh. doing what you were told you began to explain everything to yelena. you didn't leave out a single detail telling her what went on yesterday. and she listened carefully making sure not to get words confused.
once you were done talking she sat in her seat trying to think of a solution. letting out a sigh she finally
spoke "i'm not quite sure what to do. let me figure something out. until then don't do anything dumb. act out on facts not emotions."
nodding your head you cocked it to the side. your eyes traveled all around your body "i suppose it was stupid to think nothing would go wrong."
a chuckle emitted from the phone as the blonde smiled fiddling with her lip ring "i guess we jinxed it when we had that conversation."
"there is no 'i guess', we most definitely did."
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
flashback 1 year ago.
looking around, you watched a group of kids run across the field. their laughter filled the air as they playfully shouted at each other. throwing jokes around, a girl with red hair tossed a ball in the air. her pigtails waved in the wind as a blonde boy caught the object, soon cheering in success.
sighing you looked away to lean back on the uncomfortable bench "what happens if something goes wrong?"
the blonde beside you rolled her eyes. this had to be the tenth time you asked that question and her answer was the same, like always. you were worrying for nothing and yelena tried to make those doubting thoughts perish "you'll be fine. everything will go smoothly."
pressing your lips together you looked back over at the group of kids. you watched the ball being thrown back up into the air. "there's always a possibility that i can mess up."
the female turned her head looking at you. raising her hand she landed a soft slap on your shoulder making you jolt up "you're going to be fine trust me. if i thought you would do shit then i wouldn't let you go to paradis."
bringing up your hand to rub at your shoulder you inhaled nodding your head. finally, the reassurance set in and you were confident you could pull this off. you've done it time and time before but this was a whole new town.
the blonde looked away acting as if she didn't just slap you "the worst thing that could happen is if you fall in love. that would be horrible, you'd be following in pons footsteps!"
laughing you shook your head. putting your left hand on the bench you pushed yourself up while looking around the small park "well let's go find hange, i want my food."
end of the flashback.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
after saying your goodbyes you hung up the phone setting it on the black countertop. bringing your hand to the soap dispenser you let the white foam fall into your hand and rubbed it together. there was no reason you were washing your hands, you just felt like it.
the water was cold as it dripped off your hands. reaching for a rough brown paper towel you began to dry your hands off. while doing so your phone buzzed three times signaling you had a new text message.
crumbling up the paper towel into a ball you tossed it into the trashcan. leaning over the counter you looked down at your phone reading the message that popped up on the screen.
ymir
want to talk to me now?
i'm sure you do, meet me
outside.
stuffing your phone into your pocket you gave yourself one more glance in the mirror. you had always wondered why in any given situation you would have a blank stare. and it was because you were always processing too much at one time.
looking over at the pale wooden door you closed your eyes trying to prepare yourself for what may happen. you weren't sure what ymir's intentions were but there was only one way to find out.
taking a step forward you placed your hand on the bathroom door. pushing it open without another thought you started to make your way outside. you walked in the hall moving out of peoples ways. swerving around them trying not to bump into a group of egotistical boys.
in came the view of double doors and you quickly rushed over pushing the metal handle. when you walked out you felt a rush of air cast over you. it was thick and humid but still had a small breeze to it. the sky had gotten drastically darker as the clouds were more linked up. at any second it could start raining, pouring even.
looking around the courtyard you saw gardens left and right. trees were overgrown as they towered over picnic tables and benches giving them shade. bushes were trimmed to a perfect size while flowers filled open spaces.
right next to the tan brick wall sat a metal bench with two people placed on one side. going over you looked down at the concrete to see the wind rustling with the leaves making them scrape across the pavement.
setting your bag on the long bench you took a seat in front of the blonde and brunette. they both stared at you which felt like hours, days even. until ymir spoke up "what's going on?"
raising a brow you looked at the female as her hair flew around sticking to her face "what do you think is going on?"
nodding her head she leaned her body onto the table "i'm not quite sure, i have my assumptions but i want you to make it clear."
looking at two figures that sat in front of you, you released a breath getting ready to tell the rundown of the story. "for starters i didn't post that shit about eren."
a smile carved its way onto armins face as he beamed brightly "i knew you didn't!" relief washed over the blonde as he was hoping this was how the conversation would go. he wanted to prove mikasa wrong and show that you were trustworthy, that you didn't do it.
and so again you explained what happen. to when you met up with floch to talk about a plan to when cora showed up in the office unexpectedly. you didn't leave out a single detail, it was better to just lay it all out on the table. and they listened to each word that dropped from your mouth. they listened closely scared if they didn't they would get the story twisted.
the brunette scrunched her face up letting her freckles crease with the skin "so it was cora?" scoffing the female waved her arm around "who the fuck does that?"
armin sat in his seat looking down at the table. he ignored the conversation that went on between you two, only focusing on thoughts that bloomed in his head. both you and ymir went back and forth talking about the brunette and why she would do such a thing. and the blonde interrupted "what are you going to do about it?"
hearing the male speak you dropped the sentence you were saying, and stayed quiet. you blankly stared at him unsure of what to do. that was the whole reason you called yelena. "i'm not sure."
looking away from the blonde you looked around the small courtyard again "but if i do figure anything out i'll tell you guys."
armin nodded his head with creased eyebrows. of course, he had ideas of what you could do, but he wanted you to figure it out. it's not that you couldn't, you just needed time to think and plan.
gathering his things he slipped on his bag looking at you "i'll try to talk to the rest of the group, and explain the situation." throwing his leg over the bench he plopped his feet on the pavement standing up "but i can't guarantee that they'll believe me."
following along ymir quickly stood up. armin had begun to walk away looking for his friends that were scattered across the campus. but the brunette stood in front of you. catching your gaze she softly smiled "no one hates you y/n, we're all just upset and confused."
starting to back away she lifted her hand giving you one last wave. turning on her heel she followed after armin, going past the flowers that bloomed and trees that towered over everything.
your arms rested on the table and after a while, you started to feel specs of water land on your skin. looking up you could feel the small dots falling on your face. even though they were tiny drops you could feel your body shiver. but at the same time, it felt refreshing since it was hot outside.
a bag was suddenly tossed on the table making you straighten your head to look at the unknown person. her pink bag sat on the table as she graciously sat down making sure her skirt wouldn't rise. looking down at her outfit she smoothed out her shirt getting rid of wrinkles before looking at you with a smile.
raising her arms she did jazz hands "surprise!"
blinking you removed your arms from the table letting them rest on your lap. the brunette only cocked up an eyebrow at your silence "what's wrong?"
a smile etched its way onto her face "nothing to say?"
"what do you want me to say? would you like me to pat you on the back and say 'thank you?" you upbraided with a small scoff.
cora liked how defensive you got and she just kept clawing at you in hopes for your anger to rise. "that would be appreciated." turning her body to the side she showcased her back "whenever you're ready."
you sat still showing no sign that you were going to lean over the table to pat her back. she turned back around sitting correctly while looking at the scenery that surrounded you two "you know my mom always use to tell me that when you love someone, the heartbreak would always be hard."
her eyebrows went downwards as she tried to think of the sentence. "i think the actual quote was 'the stronger the love, the harder the heartbreak'." nodding her head she smiled "yup, that's what it was."
you let her words go straight through your mind. not listening to what she was trying to explain because it didn't matter. resting your cheek on your hand you examined the girl in her happy state "are you done yet?"
chuckling she leaned forward "you know what i think this means?"
grabbing onto your bag you shrugged "not sure."
"i think it means i win. and finally you'll be gone for good. you know y/n it's quite hilarious. don't you feel stupid for doubting me all those days? and now look at this! look at it! me... ME! i beat you at your own game." her eyes were wide in shock as she reviewed the words in her head.
"i beat y/n l/n at her own game. you'll be left with nothing!" she expressed with a glad smile.
quickly closing your eyes you shut them tightly. you took in a deep breath holding it for a couple of seconds before releasing it. it took everything out of you not to react. just a sentence or a fist could do justice but you kept quiet in your seat.
you cant cause a scene that would make your situation worse, you would have to wait. so before anything could escalate you got up from your seat cutting off the female who couldn't stop spewing words.
creasing her brows she watched you grab onto your bag while standing in front of the table. you looked around making sure you didn't leave anything before turning towards the set of double doors. "where are you going?"
your phone felt heavier in your pocket. it felt like it weighed down your pants and each step you took nailed you to the ground. but maybe that was because you were desperate for him to text you. "i'm leaving, is that not obvious?"
cora remained sitting as she cleared her throat getting rid of whatever was blocking her words to come up "what you don't want to sit and talk?"
raising a brow you turned your head to face her "why would i do that? you won, so i doubt you would want to talk to a loser like me."
looking back at the doors you smiled "i congratulate you. for winning that is." walking away you went down the paved concrete path not sparing a glance to look at cora. she sat still in her seat with her brows furrowed. her lips were pursed not understanding what had just happened and now she watched you walk away getting closer to the doors.
was that it?
that was her big party of finally overthrowing your own game? it didn't seem to make sense. why do you just carelessly get to walk off? bringing up her fist she brought it back down hitting the table. a small thud was made and now her hand began to hurt. a sharp needle wrapped itself around her flesh as she banged the table again.
noticing that people were starting to stare at her, she stopped. placing the palm of her hand onto the table she smiled brightly shaking all of the thoughts out of her head.
you could hear the bangs in the distance. you could assume she was having a breakdown and hopefully banging her head on the table and not her hand. but she wasn't that stupid.
checking the time you brought out your phone looking over the big font numbers. your thumbs had a mind of their own as they hovered over the screen pressing a variety of different buttons and apps. which only led to you opening up erens contact.
the horizontal blue line blinked waiting for you to type something. it stared back at you taunting you to just run your fingers over the screen, clicking letters. so you did.
you typed out a small sentence. nothing too big just a small 'can we talk?'. glancing up you realized you had been standing at the doors. cringing you pulled one open and stepped inside. your thumb hovered over the blue arrow and you decided if you should send it or not.
if you did would there be consequences?
you pushed that aside and looked up to walk around the halls and maybe you would decide on an answer on your small walk.
you looked to the side only to see two people walking your way. her hands were stuffed into her jacket pockets as her eyes were trained on the ground. she counted each step she took while watching the lines on the tiles. her partner in crime stood next to her. he held his head up high as his mouth parted to try and reassure sasha that everything would be okay.
looking away from the aburn-headed female he took a couple of long strides to get ahead of her. looking over at the double doors he let his face drop. you stood right next to them with your phone in your hand.
sensing the shift in connie's attitude, sasha looked up only to drop her head back down, with furrowed brows. swallowing she shook her head rushing to get out of the doors. the buzz-cut male followed behind her not fazed by how she was acting.
passing by you he muttered something under his breath. he did it in the right tone to where only you could hear "bitch."
forcefully pushing open the door you listened to it slam into the brick wall. looking back down at your phone you swiped out of the text message and began to walk to class. you took that as your sign not to text eren.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
you had spent the whole day running around the school. after coming back in from the courtyard you didn't run into anyone else. which is why when you had time you checked every classroom, hall, and good hiding places. but of course, you never found him.
earlier you had worked up the courage to send him a text but you were left on read. but at least he saw it?
but it didn't matter. you had looked in every class and there was no sign of him. your hope was running out and the weather couldn't help but agree.
the clouds had gotten drastically darker and thunder had begun to rumble. it hid behind the clouds only becoming louder with each lighting strick. the sound echoed in the empty parking lot and bounced off the building while also shaking it.
student's footsteps clattered against the wind that started to pick up. the cool breeze whipped your hair around making it hit your face multiple times. you spent half the walk to your car trying to swipe the hair out of your face.
play 'honest' by the nbhd
pulling out your keys you looked around the spacious parking lot and stopped in place. not caring about driving out of the school and finally getting a break to think at your house, you stuffed your keys back into your pocket.
your legs picked up the speed as you started to jog on the paved black road. the small water drops got bigger, just slightly. they still sprinkled over your skin and the air made the cool breeze worse. the wind would blow hard and goosebumps would rise and you tried to help the situation by running your hand up your forearm.
finally stopping in place you let out a couple of breaths trying to regain them. your chest raised and fell back down, and you could feel your body become weak. the shuttering feelings rushed through your veins as your hands started to shake.
you were nervous.
closing your eyes you shook your head and spoke,
"eren."
his head whipped around at the sound of his name. but this time when he looked at you there was no joyful smile, that said he was happy to see you. it was replaced with a distaste one.
scrunching up his nose he rested his hand on his car door. his finger hung off the edge as he let out a short sigh "what y/n?"
his voice was different, it wasn't the tone you had been used to every time you two conversated. it was laced with frustration and you could tell with each word that slipped from his tongue. it was obvious he didn't want to talk to you, but that didn't matter to you. not everyone gets what they want.
you didn't want to be disrespectful, so you kept your distance by moving a couple of a steps back "can we talk?" raising a brow he dropped his arm down to his side moving his body to face you "aren't you talking right now?"
"i just want to explain" you expressed.
his mouth opened but soon closed and you watched as his jaw clenched. he didn't want to blowout on you but it was becoming difficult not to do so. "there is nothing to explain. you did what you did, there's no taking that back."
quickly shaking your head you interrupted him before he could continue "that's what i'm trying to say i-"
looking to the left he tossed his keys into his car letting them land on the black leather seats "trying to say? y/n you made me believe something was going on between us and then released personal information about me. what is there possibly to say in this situation!"
regaining the step you took back, you stepped forward raising your right hand "if you would just let me talk eren i can-"
his hands shot up in the surrendering motion "no, i'm not going to stand here and listen to whatever shit you're going to tell me. i liked you y/n, i did! you were beautiful, listened to me when i talked, comforted me, you were nice, kind. everything a person could hope for!" squinting his eyes he looked away from you letting his eyes travel somewhere else "but you had different plans."
lighting struck down lighting up the dark sky. the small specs of water started to pick up as the drops got bigger. thunder echoed in your ears making you flinch at the loud sound. each drop that hit your skin started to become bigger. the wind blew right at you letting its whistling sounds enter your ear.
swallowing you tried to make him look back at you "eren i didn't do it."
his eyes never went back to your figure and instead fell to the ground. he watched the water glide down the street dripping into the cracks and forming small puddles. by the minute his body became wet and cold as he could feel his clothes absorbing the water "i wish you could be honest."
"can you just let me explain!" you yelled out, tired of the constant interrupting. this could all go by much faster if he just let you talk. but he was dedicated to keeping you silent.
chuckling he shook his head looking up at the sky. the drops of water felt refreshing as they kissed his face "i regret it." he whispered. it seemed he was talking to himself as he nodded his head at his own words.
his head fell back down to look at you. his eyes fell over your face scanning over your features one last time. this time he didn't try to memorize them. he tried to forget them by failing to know where your features went. scratching out the most recognizable things that made you pretty and the kind words you would tell him. your hands running through his hair as you softly hummed letting him drift off into slumber.
his throat tightened and he bit his tongue at the familiar feeling. it stung and he knew it was going to be hard to get this sentence out. "it was my mistake for trusting you and following you blindly. i regret everything. i regret you." throughout speaking his voice would occasionally crack.
your breath felt like it had been knocked out of you. it felt like when you were younger. you would freely swing on the swing set trying to jump off and stick the landing. but it was a simple wrong step and you fell onto your back knocking the air out of your body leaving you to gasp, begging for it to re-enter your lungs.
your chest dropped and it fell to the street as once again you were sliding against a wall, only this time there wasn't going to be anyone to help you back up. you were out of reach. someone who was deemed as just a controlling person.
you could only stand and stare at the brunette who didn't dare look at your face after saying that. he turned around on his heel towards his car. shaking your head you let out a shaky chuckle "eren?" you questioned watching him lean down sitting on the driver's seat. his left leg was still planted on the ground as he reached for the door handle to close it.
creasing your brows you took another step forward "eren don't you dare, you didn't even let me speak?!"
he stopped in his movements, pulling in his leg only gripping onto the door.
cocking your head to the side "are you serious?
he threw his head back letting it hit the headrest and worked up the strength to express his last words "i hope you can become a better person y/n." with a quick pull the car door slammed closed. as soon as it did his foot pushed onto the gas letting the car move forward without a second thought. no hesitation.
you wanted to yell, scream for him to turn back around. just for you to elaborate on what had happened, but it was over. it had been knocking on your door. the hard pounding that was created by flesh as it hit the wooden door. but you always refused to listen to it. maybe you should of. because if you did you could have heard the shouts and yells. it screamed out your demise.
it was hard to deny that it wasn't fun to be here. the memories you had made were ones you would never forget. letting out a laugh you shook your head feeling as the familiar drops ran down your cheek. they mixed with the rain rolling down your chin. turning on your heel you looked at the brick building that stood tall. the school colors were everywhere as the flags flew widely in the air.
you knew what was coming. and you were right as you could feel your phone vibrate. letting out a choked-out cry you grabbed onto the device. not bothering to look at the caller id you brought it to your ear. the line connected and their voice spoke out in a soft tone. a tone that you hadn't heard in forever. i guess you hear something new every day.
"y/n it's time to come home."
the tears busted out of your eyes and you were glad it was raining. the crashing sounds of water hitting pavement casted over your tears and the small cries that managed to escape your throat. your thumb tapped the red button hanging up. with a smile, you began to walk back over to your car.
the memories, friendships, jokes, laughs, arguments, were great. you were glad you got to enjoy it while it lasted. you were glad you got to hold him in your arms when you could. he was something you wouldn't forget. he would be stuck in your mind like a catchy melody, but so would his words.
regret. you regretted a lot of things too, but eren would never be one of them.
letting out a sigh you opened your car door. before sitting down you let the rain soak you just for a couple more seconds as you looked around the empty parking lot. you took in a deep breath trying to let everything soak in. you counted to ten just like you did on new years.
but this time you didn't receive a kiss.
once you hit one you exhaled letting out a strand of words "i guess this is my final goodbye."
plopping down into the leather seat you closed the door having enough of rain splashing on your body. you started your car, quickly turning on the heater wanting to warm up fast as possible. it was going to be a long ride back to marley.
it was funny how the world worked.
becuase,
how could a simple 'hello' soon turn into a 'goodbye'