Tw❗: Mentions of self harm, suicide attempts read if you're comfortable!
Namjoon's Pov
Two days, it has been two days since he ever raised his hands on me, he hasn't said a word until then.
I don't expect him to, I'm trying to make me better here, Make myself useful.
It hurt, a lot. Knowing he's frustrated because of me. I've failed him, didn't I?
I should just die.
One swift and blood was pouring out, spilling all over the floor.
Staining the floor with it's disgusting stain. It feels nice...calm... peace. The scene in front of my eyes started to vanish as I collapsed. ___________________
A knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts. I slowly opened my eyes, humming even though the person can't hear me.
"Come in" I tiredly but loudly said.
"Oh, if I was disturbing you I can come later, sir!" Seokjin my assistant; spoke, clearly embarrassed by making sudden appearance.
"No hyung, it's alright. Come, have a seat" I gestured him to sit in front of me.
"How did you spent your Sunday?" He asked smiling as he put some files on the table.
"It went good actually, went to Eomma's place. It has been a while since we saw them"
"That's good, as you should. They're getting old, needing kid's attention and stuff. I wouldn't know since mine already died" I gave him a sympathetic smile.
Jin hyung's father died before he was even born, later when he was in junior year of highschool, his Eomma died too. I've seen him during those days, that Jin hyung reminds me of my current situation now kinda.
"So what about the date you've mentioned last night?" He suddenly asked. I sighed, not really interested in talking in this topic.
"About that, you see I had an almost argument with Eomma and Appa last night. About this..this..thingy"
"Joon, you can't even spell the word 'getting into a relationship' by yourself and you're planning to go on a blind date set by your parents?" He let out a chuckle, I don't know if it was sarcasm or not.
"They kind of forced me into this, hyung. And their logics behind this was actually debatable so I just said yes"
"Well I don't know what logic they showed you but they aren't wrong. I'm not totally into their side but not on your side either. It's been a while, don't you think?"
"Hyung..you already know it-it isn't easy for me. I know they aren't wrong and they'll stick to their side no matter what, they've been tryna get me into this for years now"
"Just give it a try, Joon-ah. Because you've been betrayed once doesn't mean there's no way for you to fin love. If this date turns out any good like your parents are saying, then maybe he'll make a change? Who knows"
"Yoongi's philosophies are eating you too, lord. How did you became this much sappy and hopeful? You weren't like this back in highschool" I shook my head, smiling teasingly.
"How dare you call my romantic side sappy? You're so rude, Boss! And for your information, I was always like this, just didn't show it so my Highschool crush wouldn't cringe"
"Whatever, Seokjin. Is that all you're here for?"
"Uh not really, I came her to tell you about this important meeting we have tomorrow. Since you've told me to reschedule your meetings for the weekend so I've finalized some things that I wanted to discuss"
"Oh okay, tell me about it more, the people we're gonna do the deal with" and then I lost myself over the Monday Work stress.
_______________________
It was heavily raining in the evening when I finished almost all of the work, now finally taking some time out of the hectic day with a cup of warm coffee.
I don't know why but I feel really good. Alive. Not to sound depressing, but it's really rare for me to feel this good about something and I don't even know what is it I'm happy about.
No matter whichever situation am I in, I never feel this kind of way. Relieved, good, fresh about something.
I watched the scene in front of me, in the glass window. The water drops were staining the glass, making thousands of patterns in it.
Man, I loved rain, still do. Rainy days always used to be my favourite. Rain means opportunity. An opportunity for something.
I've got so many memories of rain too. Good or bad, I have a memory of everything. memories such a pretty word, isn't it?
________________________
"Tae! It's literally raining outside. Are you planning to catch a cold? Come inside, honey!" I whined, stomping on the ground disapprovingly.
It's been raining outside and he's been in the yard for the last few hours doing god knows what. Him and his stupid moments. Who'll be at blame when he'll catch a cold?
"C'mon, Namu. It's raining, don't you wanna enjoy this moment?" He smiled his beautiful square shaped smile. His smile is so adorable. Makes me feel peace every time.
"We can enjoy this weather by staying inside too! You don't wanna catch a cold, love" I squinted, pouting.
"Ah, alright. I'm here, happy?" He rolled his eyes playfully, shaking his head causing water droplets from his hair to spill everywhere.
"Aish, I have a towel here. Use it, don't ruin my-" before I could say anything, he pulled me into the rain.
"What the hell-" I whispered widening my eyes as the speed of the rain increased immediately drenching me with water.
"Hehe, you don't like it?" He sheepishly smiled.
"Tae!..you know I don't like standing in the rain. I'll catch a cold, unlike you I do care for my health!"
"Okay then, let's go inside. Someone isn't available to make out in the rain" he pouted and squinted his eyes at me, something I was doing instead of him seconds ago.
He started stomping off where I gripped his arm causing him to slip and fall into my chest.
"Woah there, you don't wanna make out in the rain anymore, huh?" I smirked, whispering into his ears. I could feel him shivering, not because of the rain though.
"Hmm..?" He hummed softly.
I cupped his face with my hands. Before he could say anything I leaned into his lips.
His lips were so soft, he tasted like honey and rain which weirdly enough was a great combo. Kissing him was an opportunity. An opportunity I always want to experience.
The kiss was full of bliss, love, affection. I bit his lips, asking for entrance. My tongue collided with his warm one, he moaned under it.
I broke away from the kiss, opening my eyes seeing his face. He looked so beautiful under the rain. Pink dust sparkled over his face, strands of his silver hair shadowing his eyes.
He looked like an angel, so beautiful.
"I love you, Namu" he smiled
I smiled too, cupping his face and bumping our noses together.
"I love you too, Taetae"
It wasn't love, I've regretted it all
Author's Note
Hello, hello :)
So, this is just a filler chapter; it was raining in my area and I've been having imaginations about it so I put all of those into this short chapter.
I'm really bad at describing romantic scenes so please excuse my awkwardness.
Song Of the Chapter is Cardigan by Taylor Swift
Word Count: 1450+