Twenty three days after the snap, Bucky found a small glimmer of hope in the hell he had been living. He had thought Tony was gone. Everybody did. They had given up any hopes of finding him a week ago. He felt the building shaking from within Catherine's bedroom. He had been lying on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. When he heard voices rising he left the room to investigate. His stomach dropped when he saw Tony standing there with a blonde woman and a female...robot?
Tony looked terrible. He had lost a significant amount of weight. His face was thin, eyes sunken in. An IV was taped to his hand dripping some sort of liquid into his hand. At first, Bucky didn't think Tony saw him. When he did, however, Bucky knew if Tony had the strength he probably would have jumped across the table and tried to strangle him. His eyes flickered to the side of Bucky at the empty spot where his sister should have been standing.
"W-Where...is...she?" Tony barely managed. He knew. Tony knew that Catherine was gone. If she hadn't been snapped she would have been one of the first people to see him.
Bucky swallowed dryly. "Gone."
It was the only words Bucky could muster. He watched as Tony's eyes glazed over with tears. His hands starting shaking. His boney chest rose and fell rapidly. He was trying to keep himself from falling apart in front of everyone. His sister was gone. Tony turned his head away from Bucky, not being able to bear the sight of him. Catherine should be there. Not him.
Bucky kept in the back of the room, body leaned against the wall. He just stared at his now brother-in-law. He didn't react when he got angry and decided to rip the IV out while everyone else tried to formulate a new plan. The only thing he did was assist Rhodey in carrying him to a hospital bed within the compound. He stood in the doorway watching as Dr. Banner read-ministered the IV this time with a sedative.
He glanced at Pepper, at least that's what he thought her name was. He knew Catherine had mentioned her before, but sometimes his mind messed details up still. She had one hand around Tony's hand. She was looking at him with sympathy, but he could tell that she was thankful he was alive. She was pregnant. He had heard her tell Rhodey only days ago. She had broken down, not knowing how she was going to raise a child without Tony.
Someone touched his shoulder. Bucky turned his head to see Steve standing there. "Ready?"
"Yeah." He said quietly, not wanting to disturb Pepper.
Catherine would have loved going to space even if it meant seeing Thanos again. She would have loved seeing the stars. She would have loved looking at the different planets in awe. He could picture her wide brown eyes looking out the window. She would have hated that they lost, again. Thanos had destroyed the stones. Now, there was no chance of ever bringing anyone back.
Bucky was angry. Furious. He wanted to kill Thanos with his bare hands, but Thor took care of that for him. The grieving process started all over again. He had hoped their plan would of worked. He hoped that he would see Catherine again. It didn't and yet again, he was a broken man. He locked himself back in Catherine's bedroom for the night and quietly cried just like he did the night before.
He felt hungover the next morning even though he did not have a drop of alcohol. It was a feeling that Bucky had not experienced in a very long time. He walked into the kitchen before the sun had even risen. Food would make him feel better. Possibly. He stopped when he saw Tony standing there cooking over the stove. He looked better than the days before. Not as lethargic.
A carton of eggs sat next to the stove. Vegetables that had been chopped up sat on a cutting board. He was cooking himself breakfast. Bucky wasn't sure if he should even be up, but he was not going to be the one to tell him to sit down. Finally, Tony looked at him. His jaw clenched. He looked like he was going to say something negative to Bucky, but he didn't.
"Want some?" Tony asked.
Bucky eyed the two omelets cooking in a pan. He was going to need more than that. "I, um, I'll make myself something. Thank you."
"Super soldier serum. I forgot. You probably could eat ten omelets." Tony said while continuing to cook.
"Well, maybe not ten." Bucky told him. He walked over to the pantry and pulled out a few packets of oatmeal.
The awkwardness hung in the air like a thick smog. At any second, Bucky expected Tony to throw something at him. He could still feel his arm being blasted off from his suit. It wasn't exactly a pleasant feeling. The two of them didn't speak. Tony sat down at the table just as Bucky's oatmeal finished.
He grabbed his bowl, ready to go eat in Catherine's room, when Tony stopped him. "You can eat in here. I don't bite."
Why the hell was he being so nice to him? Maybe Tony felt guilty. Maybe he had an epiphany up in space. He didn't protest though. He just sat across from him. They ate in silence for a few moments before Bucky's eyes landed on the wedding ring on his left hand. He realized Tony didn't know that they had married. He wrestled with telling him. Could Tony hear that kind of news?
"I married her." Bucky spoke quietly, not even looking at Tony.
Tony sat his fork down. "What?"
Why did Bucky have to speak? He could have returned to Catherine's room, packed up any belongings and leave the compound. He would never see Tony again. Catherine would have hated him running. He knew she wanted Tony and him to get along. Bucky glanced up at Tony.
"Catherine and I, we got married, in Wakanda. Just before...Thanos." He reiterated.
Tony took in the information for a second. His sister had married the man who killed their parents, the man who had kidnapped her. He knew she wanted too, but he didn't think she would actually do it.
"What did she look like?" Tony asked.
The question stunned Bucky. He half expected Tony to yell at him.
"Beautiful. She looked...beautiful. The children made her a crown out of flowers. I told her we should wait, but she insisted. I wanted her to have a big wedding with everyone she cared about there." Bucky explained.
Tony could see the smile he was suppressing as he spoke about Catherine. He could see the love in his eyes. Like he was looking at a prized piece of artwork.
"Catherine liked to march to the beat of her own drum. I found it better to let it be done her way. Her way was usually best." Tony spoke.
He realized he was speaking about his sister in past tense. Because she was gone. Because that damn alien snapped her away. He could feel tears forming in his eyes and he blinked them away.
"She never ceased to surprise me with her intellect. She was wise beyond her years. When she got angry though, that's when she terrified me the most." Bucky admitted.
Tony chuckled. "Oh yes. I wouldn't want to cross Catherine Stark when she was angry. Well, I guess it's Catherine Barnes now."
"I loved her." Bucky told him clearly. "I would have...I would done anything for her. I just want you to know that."
"I know. I can see it when you speak about her. She loved you, more than anything. Probably more than me." Tony told him.
"I'm sorry, Tony." It was the first time Bucky had ever said his name. "I'm sorry about what I did. I would take it back if I could."
"Catherine said you were under some sort of mind control? I'm going to hold you to that, because my father knew you and Steve knew you. They never said a negative word about you. Neither did my sister. I don't think I'll ever forgive you for what happened, but I like to think we could be amicable."
"Catherine would have liked this. It's a damn shame she couldn't be here to see it." Bucky said.
"Yeah. She would have."
"I miss her. God, I miss her." Bucky's voice broke. It was true. He missed Catherine every day, every moment. He longed to hear her voice. He wanted to feel her touch again. He want to see her face. "And the worst part is, there's no body. There's no way to bury her or memorialize her."
"If I could find a way, I would. I miss her too." An idea appeared in Tony's head. It was way a to help them both. "I've got some old home videos of her if you want to watch. It's not much, but I could also look through the internet. She's spoken at events and court hearings before. At least then we could hear her voice."
Bucky nodded. "I would love that."
It took Tony a few minutes to find the old videos and set it up, but once he did, Bucky was immensely grateful. He smiled as the videos played of her as a baby. Her first Christmas. Her first time walking. Her attempting to play the piano. She always had a mischievous grin on her face even as a child. He would occasionally sneak glances at Tony who sat only feet away and he wondered what Catherine would think if she saw the two of them there together.
A/n: I think I'm going to do one more part regarding this one shot. After this, I'm not sure how many more one shots I'm going to do. I've got three other stories that aren't even published yet that I want to write. Thank you for reading!