𝐑𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧
Eight months had passed in the meantime. Eight months in which I had no contact with my family. Except with Nesta.
At the beginning it was unbelievably hard. The dull pain was a constant companion. And a constant reminder that my mate didn't want me.
Because he wanted my sister.
And as the hole in my chest grew and the emptiness spread like a poison through my body, the hatred and anger towards my younger sister grew and grew-.
The first weeks I could hardly concentrate. I cut my fingers with knives, spilled potions and ointments and could hardly sleep.
But after I got to know him, it got better.
He plugged the gaping hole inside me with his easy-going, charming manner and helped me focus on my training.
And now here I was. In the middle of a large hall full of healers.
My white dress fluttered around my curvy body, blowing gently in the rising summer sun. My golden-brown waves were braided into a gentle plait and lay at the nape of my neck.
For the whole eight months I had fought for this place and got it.
My eyes shone with joy, my skin looked healthier and I finally felt like myself. Something I hadn't done since childhood. I was happy with my life, my surroundings.
By now it was clear to me that life at the night court had cramped me. This constant confusion, the constant chivvying and caring. It had thrown me into a hole I had not known about.
And I never wanted to feel like that... ever again.
"Raven Archeron."
My name echoed through the light-filled hall, sounding like a fresh breeze brushing against my skin. Slowly but surely, I stepped forward and smiled.
Also something I had never really done with my family.
The dark-skinned healer beamed gently at me and reached out his hand for mine. Without hesitation, I placed my hand in his and a slight glow made its way between our clasped hands.
Without words, the golden band wrapped itself around our hands and then like a bracelet around my fingers, my wrist.
After the glow went out, my hand tingled and the healer nodded. "Welcome, Raven!"
And the joy that crept onto my face at his words was something that made the room glow. With a slight nod on my part, I stepped down the steps and walked through the alley of older healers.
Euphoria ran through my body and if the most important healers of the entire Dawn Court were not here, I would be jumping for air.
After a while the tingling in my hand subsided and admiringly I traced the faint golden lines that were now on my hand with my other hand.
Half an eternity later, I stepped out into the open street and said goodbye to my colleagues. The word sounded surreal. Even in my head. Colleagues.
I would work with these gifted healers from now on. Even though I still had to gain experience and my probationary period was coming up, I was looking forward to the months ahead. Not just months, but years.
Humming, I walked down the sunny streets of my home, earning smiling faces. It was no secret that every year around this day the new healers were welcomed into their midst. Most people even applauded when the new healers entered the streets.
For only a few made it into the midst of these healers. And it was an honour for me to be able to move in that midst.
Strong arms closed around my middle and brought me out of my daydream. Normally I would panic, but I knew whose arms they were. Smiling, I turned to Rilo.
His dark skin glowed in the sun and I couldn't help but trace his sharp yet gentle features with my fingers. Dark green eyes looked softly into mine and a huge grin spread across his face as he grabbed my hand and gently traced the faint lines.
"You did it, darling."
And before I could process what was happening to me, I was in the air and being whirled around under the sun. A surprised shriek escaped me before I started laughing.
A laugh that hurt my stomach and made my eyes burst into flames with joy.
After a while, Rilo put me back on the floor and my head spun. With my eyes closed, I looked up at him and grinned.
Rough fingers brushed my nose and then I felt lips on the tip of my nose. Something Rilo had been doing from the beginning. But I would not complain-
Arm in arm, we walked chatting to his family home. Despite his age, he lived with his parents, as did his sister and her mate.
At first it had hurt to see his family so happy, but after a few weeks his family became my family. His parents became my confidants. My mother and father, in a sense. His sister became my sister. Their child my niece.
And I had never felt alone since I had been with them.
Of course I missed my real family, but as the saying goes: family is not always connected by blood.
No sooner had we arrived at the big, homely house than the door flew open and Reiko, Rilo's mother, rushed out with her arms open. And shortly after, she crashed into my body and together we stumbled back as Rilo's warm laughter echoed through the air.
I gave him a mock scowl, but he just grinned and then gave me a mischievous wink.
After hours, Reiko let go of me, then pressed a hearty kiss on my cheek and went into the house with me on her arm. Rilo had regained his composure and walked diagonally beside me. One arm wrapped around my back.
It was a thing I had learned early on. Rilo was a Fae who insisted on physical contact and he really wasn't shy about it.
Be it when we went for a walk or just sat together on the couch. At least one arm was wrapped around me or his family members.
When we arrived at the house, I was immediately wrapped in a hug again. This time from Kane, Rilo's father, and then from Thena, his sister.
With a big smile, I hugged them back, meanwhile taking in the delicious smell of Reiko's food.
Because this woman was a fucking master at cooking. Which was probably because the family owned their own restaurant. I tell you, it was the best food in all of Prythia!
Hours later we sat together on the sofa and told stories. The whole family knew my story, from beginning to end, and when I told them about the situation with Azriel, I had to stop Kane and Rilo from going head over heels to my family and ripping Azriel's head off. The two ladies were no better. You could tell by their faces that they were secretly planning how best to poison my mate.
The only one who had looked at me, bubbling and laughing, was my niece Rhea (pronounced Ria). At barely ten months old, she was a real angel. Only the unruly curls she had from her father.
Yawning, I lay against my best friend's shoulder and closed my eyes. The day had been long and exhausting.
Through a veil I heard Rilo brush my hair out of my forehead, then lift me up and lay me gently on my bed.
Sleepily I opened my right eye and squinted at him. A mischievous grin already on his lips. With one last look, he turned away and started to walk out of my room, but I grabbed his hand and turned him to face me.
My eyebrows were drawn together and a deep crease had formed on my forehead.
"No goodnight kiss?" Even my voice sounded sleepy and rough.
Amused, he shook his head and leaned down to me with a dramatic sigh. With his index finger, he smoothed the crease on my forehead and then breathed a kiss on my forehead. Like he did every night-
Before he left my room, however, he turned and said softly, "Be well rested. Tomorrow we'll spend the day with Rhea."
Sleepily, I could only nod and then wandered off into the land of dreams.
The next morning I was awakened by the rays of the sun. And gods how I loved it. The sun was shining beautifully in Dawn Court and the sunrises and sunsets were to die for.
Grumbling, I rose from my very comfortable bed and shuffled into the kitchen. A pleasant volume awaited me and a heavenly breakfast. With a wink, Reiko had placed the plate in front of me and said lightly, "For the new member of the supreme healers."
A slight blush crossed my cheeks at her words and I couldn't suppress a proud smile.
A kiss on the cheek drew my attention to Rilo, who was now standing beside me, stealing a strawberry from my plate. I rolled my eyes but returned the gesture without hesitation.
"When do we leave?" My words were directed at Rilo, who was already dressed. "When you're dressed, darling."
With a pointed look he peered at my clothing and for the second time in five minutes I rolled my eyes.
Three quarters of an hour later I was standing at the front door, dressed and ready, with my niece strapped to my chest. Her little hands were pawing at my collarbone the whole time, but I couldn't bring myself to remove her hands.
Rilo had a bag in his hand and held his arm out for me to hook into. Thena smiled exhaustedly at me and then waved goodbye before probably going upstairs to get some sleep with Rio.
The sun was warm as we walked down the streets, stopping at vendors in between to sample something. It was probably around lunch time when we found a small but cosy restaurant and sat down to eat.
While Rilo ordered food for us, I took a whining Rhea in my arms and looked for her bottle. Almost out of reflex, Rilo reached for it without looking away from the waiter and handed it to me.
A smile spread across my lips and I said softly thank you before concentrating on Rhea.
𝐀𝐳𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐥
For eight months my body and head had been fogged with an impenetrable emptiness. Ever since Raven left us, there was an emptiness in my chest that I couldn't fill. A hole that felt like the black infinity I felt every moment I did my job.
Even certain distractions were useless. Constantly I found myself on the precipice of a cliff. My shadows were a mess.
It was not only the inner emptiness that bothered me, but also Nesta. The otherwise peaceful relationship was destroyed, her anger at me always present. And not only at me. Her entire behaviour towards Elain had also changed drastically. She was no longer the overprotective sister. No, she was dismissive, cold and curt.
You could tell that Elain was suffering too, but I couldn't bring myself to tell Nesta not to be like that.
Cassian was the only one she "trusted" and who could reassure her.
Five months after Raven left, Feyre had told us she was pregnant. Fear and joy were our constant companions from then on until she gave birth.
And now, as she was in her fourth month, we stood in Dawn Court. She was desperate to tell her sister.
And I had no doubt that Feyre's pregnancy was not the only reason to visit her eldest sister. No! Because Feyre wanted her sister back with her. With us in the night court.
My head didn't really want to wrap around the idea that we would soon be seeing my mate. Even though this would probably have a not so nice ending.
And so we walked along the sunny streets, stopping now and then.
I was jolted out of my thoughts by an abrupt stop.
Curious, my shadows slithered in the direction everyone was looking. And what they said sent ice-cold shivers down my spine. As fast as I could, driven by my instincts, I stumbled to the front of the group and my eyes widened.
There, a few hundred metres away, sat Raven. With another man and a child.
Her skin and hair glowed and you could see the joy and relaxation on her face. The sight ached in my chest, the mate bond coming to life. The faint glow a reminder of what I had fucked up.
But it wasn't just pain that drove me crazy, jealousy did too. It settled over my eyes like a red veil, but before I could do anything I felt a gentle hand on my arm and looked down at my High Lady.
Feyre just shook her head and then nodded wide-eyed in Raven's direction.
Arm in arm, she walked with the man in our direction and froze when she recognised us. The joy was wiped away and despite the distance I could tell she was starting to shake.
The man only pulled her closer, causing a deep rumble to come from my chest. The child in Raven's arms seemed to be asleep, for she gently stroked her head and then whispered something in the young male's ear.
And then they came towards us. But her eyes never turned to me.
A few metres in front of us she stopped and said without any greeting, "What are you doing here?"
Speechless, I stared at her, not noticing the male staring at me as Raven ignored me.
Feyre took a step forward and before she could say anything Raven jumped out and said calmly and without emotion, "You're pregnant. So what are you doing here?"
This time it sounded less like a question and more like a command.
My High Lady put a hand on her stomach, took a deep breath and began. "We are here because we want you back. I want you to come home with us again."
Wordlessly, Raven stared at her, put a hand on the girl's head to shield her from the sun and shook her head. My eyes narrowed and I stared at the faint golden lines. Apparently I wasn't the only one doing this, because in the next moment Rhys breathed, "You're one of the top healers."
A proud smile spread across her lips, as did the male who looked down at her lovingly.
Spikes of jealousy prickled my body and I was on the verge of tearing his hand from Raven's body.
"I have found my home, Feyre. Nesta understands that. I will not come with you." Raven's words were gentle, but you could hear her determination in them.
You could feel the sadness and anger emanating from Feyre and Rhys.
𝐑𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧
I knew I was being unfair, but I would not give up my life to go back. I wanted to live here. With my new family I was happy. I was happy and proud that my youngest sister would become a mother, but I would not go back. Rhysand and Feyre didn't seem to like that, because I could literally feel their feelings. The anger and sadness hit me hard, but Rilo only tightened his grip around me and the warmth his body gave me was enough to calm me down.
I skilfully ignored Azriel. Because if I looked, I was sure I wouldn't be able to withstand his gaze.
Slowly I nodded and turned to my sister. Her tears ran down her rosy cheeks and I said softly: "I will be there for you. If you need anything, write to me. But I will not come back. I have found my life here. Please accept that."
Slowly and carefully, without provoking Rhysand who was watching my every move, I stepped forward and put my hands to my sister's cheeks.
My fingers were rough against her cheeks as I brushed away her tears and whispered, "I'm so proud of you."
And with those words, I turned and walked away arm in arm with Rilo.
With silent tears running down my cheeks.
so I thought this is the dress Raven is wearing, just in white ;)
sorry I didn't update in this long, but I was out of motivation to write something and then I got my wisdom teeth out, blah blah blah....
but here is something and I am pretty satisfied by it :)
whatever ideas and Suggestions for improvement are welcome. and comments.
and what the fuuuuuck? Over fucking 2.9 Reads???? This is insane, thank you sooooo much for reading and voting <3
Love y'all <3 see you *waves in friendly*