Atsumu's POV
Please.
"I'm the twins' real father."
After that, it was just ringing in my ears. My body went into some kind of shock; making me unable to move or anything. I couldn't hear anything else when I saw Omi reaching out for me and I instantly avoided it, he looked shocked and hurt. He was saying something but it was all incoherent to me. My heart was beating so much that it was getting hard to breathe. I stood from Omi's lap. Looking around, for anything! For an escape!
Atsumu: "I- - I need to get out of here..." I was hyperventilating. I saw that Omi was trying to get close again but I was still not hearing him just deafening ringing that just won't stop. My body was moving on its own instinct, backing away from touch that gave me love and comfort. I couldn't think straight when my back finally hit the door. "I- - I need..." My hands desperately looked for something to grab onto when it finally found the cold steel door knob, quickly twisting it to open the piece of wood that was encaging me in this room. "I need to go." I bolted out of the company and just went straight to the twins' school and pulled them out in the middle of class and just took them home.
I cried on my bed as I still couldn't hear anything other than the ringing. Even with the comfort of my two sons, I couldn't calm down. I was just thankful at how amazing my children were, just taking care of me. Aito covered me with a big fluffy blanket while Akio ran downstairs to the kitchen to get a small box of chocolate milk from the fridge. Now, here I am, rolled up in a big fluffy blanket, drinking chocolate milk through a bendy straw, while my kids cuddle me.
I feel a bit broken, confused, and hurt. I didn't want to leave the house. I didn't want to meet or talk with anyone, not even my brother but that didn't stop him from coming by anytime he wanted. I turned off my phone and isolated myself in my house.
Omi being the twins' real father was my worst nightmare. I prayed so hard that the man I shared that night 5 years ago wasn't him. It feels like it changes everything that we have right now. All the built up trust, love, and happiness was just shattered before my eyes, leaving me scared and empty. Why is this happening?
I have finally moved on from that heart wrenching pain of 5 years ago only to be pulled back in this endless pit of pain and mental torture. I have done nothing but be strong up until now. I have fought so many demons inside of me not wanting to break again because I have two sons that I want to protect this time. I thought this time was different for me. I thought I could handle anything , face anything but it would seem that I could only do all those things when you're beside me... but what happens when you're the reason why I am so hurt right now? When you're the one I have to face? Who's with me then that gives me the strength that I needed? The one person who I'll trust because I know how weak I am.
I am insecure about a lot of things. I was always uneasy whenever I thought about Omi being the real father of my twins, having the thought that if he didn't want them then, why would he want them now. He might be happy now but what if over time, he slowly realizes that he had made a big mistake? That he was better off without us in his life?
No.
Omi said that he loves us and I need to trust his words. I want to trust his words... I want to trust him because if I didn't... then there's no future in our relationship. Even I, know that love isn't enough anymore... We needed to talk. I wanted to hear what you have to say but then Rin said that you've given me time off from work... until I was ready again. I felt my heart sink. You didn't want to see me, you didn't want to talk to me, you didn't want to fix this...
Were you giving time to prepare myself for when you finally break up with me?
I was just a mess for the past week, thinking of all these awful things that my family is heading towards. Was our together not enough for you to stay with us? Did our mistake from 5 years ago, that big of a trauma for you, that you'll just throw away our family?
I couldn't bring myself to open up my phone and call you or even just text you. I was afraid that you might have already ended things between us through text and I didn't want to see those horrible words because I know that I'll be reading them over and over again for the rest of my life, thinking and asking:
Where did it all go wrong?
What do I say to the kids then? How would we move on from this? How will we ever learn to trust someone again? To love someone like we did with you again? Because if I have loved you 5 years ago without even meeting you and then falling in love with you again after all the years of pain, I don't think I'll be capable of loving someone else again. I believe that we are destined to find and be only with that one special person, and I am sure you were mine...
But was I yours?
Between the two of us, I knew I was the one who got lucky with you. In our relationship, you were the one who was out of my league... I could never compare to you and because of that, I could never come to you first... I could never demand anything from you... I am too afraid. All I can do is wait but another week has passed and Omi is still not here nor has he said anything. Were we really over? Was this his answer?
I feel so stupid that it was laughable. It was pathetic that I was willing to wait for someone who might not want to be with me anymore. I am so hopelessly in love that I am hoping for a man that was hurting me at this moment. I wanted to see you, to talk to you, run to you and just hug and kiss you.
I miss my Alpha...
But all I can do is wait.
Akio: "Mama..." I looked at them. "Where's Papa?" There it was, the question that I have dreaded to hear. I couldn't blame them since it has been a week since they last saw their father. They have been patient with me since I look a bit unstable.
Aito: "Is Papa mad at us?" They looked down with teary eyes. I am so stupid to not notice how they were as uneasy as I was. I feel like such a bad mother. "Mama, pwease don't cry..." What do I say to them? How do I face this?
Atsumu: "I- - " *Hic *Hic. I could only cry and the two confused kids could only comfort me.
The next day, I woke up without my two adorable pups beside me. For once in a long time, I felt my bed to be too big, it felt empty and cold with just me in it. I got up, not wanting to stay in bed any longer because I know it will only drag me into depression. I started looking for the pups only to find them in the living room by the window... just looking out, like they were waiting for someone.
Atsumu: "Dumplins'..." My voice came out small but they heard me and turned to look up at me. They looked a bit down so I sat next to them. "What's wrong with my babies?" I wrapped my arms around them and their eyes started to get glossy.
Akio: "When is Papa comin' home, Mama?"
Aito: "We miss Papa..."
Atsumu: "I- - I miss him too..." I can't lie to them anymore, especially now that they're being so considerate of me. "I don't know where he is?" I cried.
Akio: "Did he leave us?" My eyes widened as my heart dropped at the idea. He saw my reaction and started crying as he buried his face on my chest.
Aito: "No!" We stopped and looked at Aito. "Papa wouldn't do that! Papa loves us!" He cried his heart out, clenching his shirt by the chest. "Papa pwamis he would never leave us..." Looking at Aito, he truly has changed. Omi really made an impact on the two, especially Aito. No wonder I see so much of Omi in him, strong, lovable, dependable, and hard working.
Atsumu: "Yer right, Dumplin..." I wiped my face. "Papa wouldn't leave us..." I started wiping their faces, calming Akio down. "A lot is just happenin' right now... But I'm sure Papa is handling it right now. " I kissed them both on their forehead.
I was prepared to wait for Omi with a heavy heart that was full of pain, bitterness, and self hate... but now it is different... Now, I'm waiting with our kids. Now, I'm waiting impatiently with a heart full of hope, love, and new resolve for us. So Omi...
"Please come home already... We miss you."
Another week has passed and there was still no sign of Omi but I didn't let it get to me. I needed to be strong not just for me but for our kids. But I wasn't going to lie and say that it wasn't hard, when each passing day that you didn't show made me doubt myself but it only made me realize... how much I really do love you. Now, I stood here just looking at the engagement ring you gave me and for the first time in two weeks, my heart finally felt light for some reason. I guess I finally have my answer.
Akio: "Mama, we're hungry..." I felt a tug on my pants and saw two adorable puppies.
Aito: "Food, pwease..." They looked so adorable with their puppy dog eyes and I just chuckled.
Atsumu: "Alright..." I crouched down and picked them up. "How about I make yer favorites?" I placed them on their chairs by the dining table.
Akio: "Yaaay!" He cheered.
Aito: "And Papa's favorite!" I don't know what it was, but... today felt different. Today I wasn't uneasy, I wasn't restless... I feel carefree today. I smiled at the two.
Atsumu: "Of course!" I beamed. "We don't want Papa to feel left out now, don't we?" They cheered again and I started cooking their favorites and putting out plates and utensils. After cooking, I gave the twins' their food. And when I got to Omi's plate I finally noticed the man standing by the doorway... just looking at us... crying.
Kiyoomi: "You're still here..." He ran up to the kids; picking them up and hugged the three of us.
Atsumu: "O- - Omi...?" He pulled away a little, I was shocked, my eyes started to sting.I cupped your face, still not believing that you were finally here. "Yer here..." Your voice broke. "It's really ya..." My heart was pumping too much and I couldn't take it anymore and just kissed you and just like that everything was okay again. "What took ya so long!" I lightly hit your arm.
Akio: "Where have ya been Papa!?"Our two adorable little pups were in tears as they gripped Omi's shirt, afraid he'll disappear again.
Aito: "We missed ya Papa, ya meanie!" He puffed out his cheeks but Omi looked a bit confuse.
Kiyoomi: "Ummm... Dumplings..." The three of you looked at each other. "Can you guys give me and Mama some privacy for a minute?" They just stared at their Papa for a while before nodding. You kissed their foreheads before letting them down and ran off to the living room. You finally turned to me, looking a bit shy and embarrassed. "Love..." You opened my arms with desperation in your face. Looking at you right now is just melting my heart. I have waited for you for so long. Thinking and imagining how I'll be able to face you again but none of those matter anymore... I just wanted to be in your arms again. "I'm sorry..." The ringing in my ears had finally stopped. I can finally hear you, see you, touch you.
I thought I wanted to hear an explanation or something. I thought you would say something grand or profound to make things all better but this was all I needed.
You were all I needed.
Atsumu: "Ya have a lot of things ta do ta make it up fer us..." I just hugged him tighter and for once I was the one you could cry on. This time, it was my turn to be the stronger one.
Kiyoomi: "I will... just please...stay with me..."
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tbc