"You have a ring, too."
Iniangat ko ang kamay kong puno ng pintura upang ipakita kay Liam ang maliit na singsing sa aking palasingsingan.
We're both laying on the faux fur rug because we're tired of playing na. Sobrang dumi na ng mga damit namin dahil sa iba't ibang kulay ng pintura. Our faces have paints, too.
Si Pascal ay nasa pagitan naming dalawa. Puno rin ng pintura ang kaniyang balahibo dahil nakisali siya sa amin kanina. His head is resting on Liam's belly while we're both caressing his fur.
"Kuya Hans gave me this."
I smiled as I look at the ring, like I'm looking at Kuya Hans and the way he looks at me that day.
"Vivienne!" rinig kong tawag ni Kuya Hans sa baba.
"Coming up, Kuya!" sigaw ko sa maliit na boses kaya natawa si Ate Nory sa tabi ko. She's braiding my long long hair. "Is it done?"
"Malapit na. Isang ipit na lang."
"Yay! Thanks, Ate Yaya!"
Ate Nory put so many flower hair clips on my braided hair. When it is done, I embraced her first before looking at the antique French mirror in front of me. Medyo tumalikod ako upang makita nang maayos ang buhok at hindi ko mapigilang ngumiti at mamangha nang makita iyon.
It looks so marvelous.
Dali-dali akong bumaba para ipakita ang itsura ko kay Kuya Hans. The hem of the purple dress I'm wearing sways as I ran down the stairs.
"Careful, Vivienne," Kuya Hans, with his white button-down dress shirt, said.
I grin and walk near him. Nang nasa harap ko na siya, umikot ako. "Do I look like a princess na?"
He smiled and nodded. "My princess."
I pouted because I felt a little kilig. My Kuya Hans is really sweet!
Nagpunta kami sa courtyard kasama ang mga kasambahay. Our parents aren't home that's why we can do everything we want. And this afternoon, we planned to throw a princess-theme tea party.
I'm the creative genius behind all of this. But Kuya Hans was the one who prepared the food and set up the glam stations in the whole courtyard for entertainment. Then we tell magical stories, sing my favorite song which is Mandy Moore and Zachary Levi's I See the Light, and have our faces painted.
When it's time for the cake and everyone is busy preparing it, Kuya Hans poked my cheek using his index finger.
I chuckle as I look at him. "What is it, Kuya?"
Ngumiti siya at pinakita sa akin ang isang maliit na singsing sa palad niya. My eyes widened in so much awe. It's a sparkling angel wing ring. It looks so elegant and amazing.
"Super ganda niya! Para kanino 'yan, Kuya?"
"For you."
"For me?" I asked in a childlike wonder that's why he chuckles.
"Yes, for you, my princess." Kinuha niya ang kanang kamay ko at inilagay ang singsing sa ring finger ko. "I want to give you a ring before your man will. So that you'll remember that I loved you first."
I smiled but I felt how hot tears brimmed on the corners of my eyes. "I love you, Kuya Hans."
He spreads his arms, waiting for me to hug him so I did. I felt him kiss the top of my head before saying, "I always love you, little sis."
Napangiti ako sa alaalang iyon at itinagilid ang ulo upang makita si Liam. But my lips slightly part when I surprisingly see him staring at me. Parang kanina niya pa iyon ginagawa habang nagk-kuwento ako.
Madaming pintura ang mukha niya, iba't ibang kulay, ngunit ang gwapo pa rin ng itsura niya.
"Both of our rings are given by the love of our lives," aniya.
Tumango ako. "And both of them are our best friends."
"We can be each other's best friend."
"Really?" manghang tanong ko.
"Yeah —"
Napatigil siya sa pagsasalita nang tumahol si Pascal. Nagkatinginan kaming dalawa at parehong natawa.
"He wants to be our best friend, too," tumatawang sabi ko.
"We're trio now, then."
Pascal barked again but this time, it's soft. Isiniksik niya pa ang sarili niya sa aming dalawa na tila niyayakap kami.
Nang makita kami ni Manang Terentina sa ganoong posisyon, napa-sign of the cross siya dahil ang kalat talaga namin. She hysterically ordered us to clean ourselves and we do that naman... but we can't help but laugh.
Kahit sina Ate Nory at ang ibang house helpers ay natawa na lang din nang sinimulan nilang linisin ang kwarto ko. Liam helped them, too. I also want to help them but Manang Terentina reprimands kaya hindi ko na itinuloy.
Sabay-sabay kaming lahat kumain for dinner habang nagk-kuwentuhan. Doon ko na-ikwento ang plano kong pagpapalit ng disenyo ng aking kwarto. Because it's a princess-like bedroom. And I find it too girly for me now.
The bed with a headboard reminds the fairy tales because of its veil. The palette revolved around light blush tones, lilac, and neutrals, with just enough pastel pinks. The bedding, curtains, wardrobe, nightstand, and other furniture are styled like the one in the fairy tale movies.
And I want something new na. Like a boho-themed room.
"Let's do that."
Lahat kami ay napalingon kay Liam. Tila imposible kasi ang gusto kong mangyari dahil kailangan pa ng permiso sa parents ko. And no one is daring to talk to them. Kaya ngayong naglakas loob na magsalita si Liam, sa kaniya napunta ang atensyon naming lahat.
"I'll try to talk to Sir Steven about that first then we'll do it right after."
Naging malaki ang ngiti ko dahil sa sinabi niya. I smiled at him and he smiled back. When Ate Nory and Ate Terry cleared their throats, I looked at them while pouting.
I don't know why they're always like that!
I don't know how Liam was able to get dad to allow me to change my room, but he did. Hindi ko rin alam kung kailan siya nagpaalam dahil hindi ko naman na nakikita ang parents ko rito sa bahay. Siguro sa trabaho ay nagkikita sila. Because Liam is on labor work in our company. He need that for experience. Kaya matagal siyang mananatili rito.
"I think we don't need to change everything. The walls are fine naman with those neutral colors. Maybe the decorations na lang," sabi ko kay Liam nang mapunta kami sa section ng paints.
We're in one of the stores in the mall to buy some stuff. It's Saturday and he planned to spend it with me. Kasama namin sina Ate Nory at Pascal rito sa loob. But they're busy looking at people kaya kaming dalawa lang ang busy sa pag-uusap.
"So how will we decorate your room? Do you have ideas in mind?"
"Yeah. Let's go to that section." Tinuro ko ang lush green couch na nakita at hinawakan ang braso niya upang hilahin siya papunta roon.
My room has key areas such as a lounge, study area, walk-in closet, walk-in shower, dresser, and display shelving. I want to center the design of the lounge around a cute couch and decorate it with plants, my favorite art pieces, and a floating vertical bookshelf. And my bed, I want a macrame to hang above it.
It's so cute if I framed prose from one of my favorite books and hung it alongside the artwork and photos on the wall, right? I want that.
Tinulungan ako ni Liam sa lahat ng gusto kong mangyari. I feel like he completely understands what I'm trying to say even before I speak up because he already knows what to do. It makes me adore him more. Isn't it beautiful when someone understands you?
At ang isa pang nakakatuwa ay wala siyang reklamo. Kahit medyo naging picky ako sa mga designs and colors dahil gusto kong bumagay iyon sa palette ng room ko. He also listened attentively to everything that I said that's why we missed nothing.
"Doon na lang po siguro sa itaas 'yan, Manong."
I giggled when I hear Liam talk in Tagalog again.
Nagtutulong-tulong sila para iayos sa van ang mga pinamili namin. Medyo pinalayo nila ako roon upang iwasan ang anumang disgrasya.
Nang makita ako ni Ate Nory, napanguso ako. 'Yan na naman siya sa mapaglaro niyang ngiti!
"Why are you always looking at me like that?"
She shrugged and chuckled. Ngunit wala siyang sinabing kahit ano. Muli akong napanguso at inilibot ang tingin sa paligid hanggang sa makita ang isang matandang lalaking nagtitinda ng dirty ice cream.
Agad kong hinawakan ang braso ni Ate Nory at medyo niyugyog iyon. "I want that."
"Hindi pwede."
"Wala si Manang Terentina."
"Vivienne Gayle..."
"Please?" I gave her beautiful eyes so she chuckles.
"Isa lang, ha."
"Thank you!" I hugged her before Pascal and I ran towards Manong Sorbetero. "What are the flavors po?"
Super marunong na akong bumili ng dirty ice cream dahil minsan ay mayroong dumadaan na ganito sa village. Kahit super dalang no'n, hindi ko pinapalagpas ang pagkakataong bumili. Mas masarap para sa akin ang dirty ice cream kaysa mga expensive na sorbetes.
"Avocado, melon, at cheese po, Ma'am."
Nahiya ako. "Don't Ma'am me po, Manong. Vivienne po ang name ko. Kayo po?"
"Dondon, hija."
I smiled. "Manong Dondon, bili po ako. Lahat ng flavors po sa cone ko. And sila po, give them... What flavor do you want, Ate Nory? Sina Liam at Kuya Jomar din. Wait, I'll ask them."
Habang nags-serve si Manong Dondon, nilapitan ko sina Liam at Kuya Jomar. Pati na rin 'yung mga staff ng store na nag-aayos pa rin ng gamit sa van.
"Do you want some dirty ice cream, Liam?" tanong ko nang makalapit sa kaniya.
Pero hindi siya sumagot dahil may tinitingnan siya sa malayo.
Sinundan ko ang tingin niya at nakita ang isang babae sa kabilang side ng kalsada. She's smiling while talking to a group of people, probably her friends. She's wearing a black baby doll dress and platforms. She looks so lovely.
Itatanong ko pa lang sana kay Liam kung kilala niya ang babae nang makita ko si Alex. Tumatawa siya kasama ang isa pang magandang babaeng mukhang modelo. She looks quite intimidating, though. But she's familiar; I think I saw a picture of her in Liam's album.
"Shala! Si Liam ba 'yon? Girl, si Liam nga!" kinikilig na sabi ng isang babaeng kasama nila kaya lahat sila ay napalingon sa direksyon namin.
Nagkatinginan si Alex at 'yung babaeng parang model; tapos ay parehong napangiti bago lumapit sa amin. 'Yung babaeng tinitingnan naman ni Liam kanina ay natigilan ngunit agad ding nakabawi. She fixed herself first before walking with her friends towards us.
"Liam, sa'n kayo?" tanong ng isa pang babae.
Ang dami nilang babae... at halos lahat ay nakangiti kay Liam.
I smiled. They look so cute admiring him. Super halata iyon sa kinang ng mga mata nila.
"We just bought some stuff. Kayo?" ani Liam.
"Meeting ng org." Napalingon sila sa akin kaya nginitian ko sila. "Uy, sister mo?"
I chuckle. Liam chuckles, too. Ganoon din si Alex at 'yung babaeng mukhang modelo.
"My best friend," si Liam.
Napanguso ako nang tumingala sa kaniya. I saw him glanced at me but it didn't last. Still, ramdam ko ang paglundag ng puso ko sa sobrang saya nang marinig iyon mula sa kaniya.
Best friend na talaga kami.
"Hello, Vivienne!" si Alex.
"Hello!" I waved a little so he chuckles.
Nang mapatingin ako sa tabi niya, ngumiti siya at isinukbit ang braso roon sa braso ng babae. I think, super close nilang dalawa.
"Ito si Jezra, girl. Friend din namin. 'Yung laging bukambibig ni Tristan no'ng pumunta kami sa palasyo niyo!"
I didn't know why they keep on saying that our house is a palasyo but I just let it be. Because I started looking at the features of Jezra.
She's fair. Her tall height is perfect for her slender body. Her straight jet-black hair is until her tailbone, she looks so elegant and sophisticated on it. But she looks quite intimidating because of her slightly chinita eyes.
I smiled at her. "Hello. Super ganda mo po. You look like a model."
Jezra's face softened. "Thank you, Vivienne. But don't use po on me. We're like same age lang naman."
Tumango ako at nahihiyang ngumiti.
"And this is Francine. Liam's... I mean, friend din namin," tumatawang sabi ni Alex matapos siyang kurutin sa tagiliran no'ng babaeng tinitingnan ni Liam kanina.
"Hello, Vivienne," ani Francine. Malumanay at sobrang ganda ng boses niya. "Nice meeting you. I never heard him introduce a best friend before so I'm glad that he has now."
Magsasalita pa lang sana ako nang agad sumingit si Alex. "Pero girlfriend, sis, wala pa siya."
Napailing si Francine ngunit pinamulahan siya ng pisngi. When I looked at Liam, he's smiling slyly. And his ears are getting red, too!
Oh, my god. Liam is feeling kilig ba?
I couldn't help but suppress a giggle while listening to their conversation for the whole time. They just catch up a little bit. At nagpaalam na rin sa isa't isa kalaunan.
"You like Francine, don't you?" tanong ko habang kumakain ng dirty ice cream.
Magkakatabi kami nina Liam at Pascal sa gitna ng van habang si Ate Nory ang nasa shotgun seat.
Ngumiti siya nang maliit ngunit hindi nagsalita. He's also eating ice cream Ate Nory bought for us earlier.
"Come on. We're best friends naman. I won't tease you. In fact, I'll support you."
"Yes. I like her."
I put my hands on my mouth to cover it and giggled. Natawa siya sa reaksyon ko at bahagyang nailing. But I couldn't help it. Super natutuwa akong may love life pala siya.
"I'm so so happy for you, Liam! Super bagay kayo ni... what's her name again? Francine?"
Tumango siya at ngumiti. And his smile is not his ordinary smile. It's something. Like he's feeling kilig, too!
"Yup. Francine Magallanes."
"You like her since when? Matagal na kayong magkakilala? Are you courting her? Tell me about her! I want to know my best friend's girl!"
Napahalakhak siya. He leaned his head on the headrest sideways to look at me. Kaya ginaya ko ang ginawa niya, inihahanda ang sarili sa pakikinig.
"She's... beautiful."
I agree. When Francine was in front of me earlier, I saw her features and I could say that she's really a beauty. She's tall and petite girl, super bagay talaga kay Liam. She has fair skin, long wavy hair, a pair of light-brown eyes, and a pointed nose. And maybe her soul is pretty, too. Because Liam wouldn't like her if she isn't.
"I like her since I was thirteen, in my second year of high school. But I first saw her at a modeling workshop. Dad was a photographer there and I've accompanied him once. Hanggang sa nakita ko si Francine at piniling sumama araw-araw para lang makita siya..."
I smiled. That's so cute of him.
"... It sounds so cheesy but when I saw her, a moment of slow-motion just like in every corny romantic movie I had ever seen happened. I couldn't help it. I was struck. I could've stared at her until I dropped dead."
He chuckled so I chuckled, too.
"Since that day, I couldn't help but be cheesy. That's when I start to believe that there's no such thing as planning to like someone in specific. Because I don't know why I like her. Yes, she's beautiful. She's kind. She's everything a man could ask for a woman. But I couldn't find words to describe exactly why I like her. I just like her. I know I really really like Francine."
Super saya niyang panoorin ngayon. Because his eyes were twinkling with so much glee and admiration as if he's seeing the girl he likes in front of him right now. As if Francine is here with us.
Sa sobrang saya ng mga mata niya, pakiramdam ko ay hindi lang pagkakagusto ang nararamdaman niya sa babae. I think he's in love with her.
"I persistently create scenarios in my head of how I would tell her I like her. I always encouraged myself to tell her how I feel. But when I'm closer to it, my tongue is tied. I couldn't tell it to her directly. I couldn't pull myself to ask her out. To date her. To court her..."
"Why?"
He clicked his tongue and slightly shook his head. "I don't know."
Napanguso ako. "I don't know what to say because I never experience confessing to someone. But maybe, it's really hard to confess 'no? I mean even outgoing people like you feel shy when it comes to the person they like."
"Yeah..."
"But don't worry, Liam. With a little more confidence, you can confess to her na. For now, build it up muna. Take it slowly. Take every little time in the world to overcome that feeling of little apprehensive. It's pretty normal to be nervous naman. It's nothing to embarrass about. Because it signifies that you're calculating things pa. You're making sure you're certain with your moves. Right?"
"Right."
I clapped my hands in glee. "We're gonna work on that. I'll help you out. We won't be best friends for nothing."
Hindi siya nagsalita at nanatili lang na nakangiti sa akin kaya nagpatuloy ako.
"There are boundless things that we can't conquer but that shouldn't fail to see the fact that there are also things that we can do and we should at least try. You know what, I feel like happiness is abstract; like the sky without definite boundary; like water without certain motion... but that doesn't mean we can't make it flow into our lives. So maybe we should start doing things that we can do and not let the things we cannot do stop us."
"That's the exact words you need to tell to yourself."
Kumunot ang noo ko kaya humalakhak siya nang bahagya.
"The world ain't always sunshine and rainbows as you already know, Vivienne. It's a vile place for someone innocent like you. So fight for what you really want with a brave heart. You don't have to live your life the way you're living now because the people around you want you to live like that. Life is too short to live for other people's life."
"You're talking about my dream."
Tumango siya. "I am."
"But it's not that easy, Liam. Dad doesn't believe that I can do things like that."
"People will believe when you make them believe. So believe in your dream if you want people to believe."
"It's... it's... scary."
"It's scary, but at some point, you have to face what scares you the most. Face your fears because nothing will ever happen if you keep running away from it."
Marahan akong napatango, sumasang-ayon.
"We both have fears and doubts but that doesn't mean we're weak. We're human. We're allowed to feel those things."
I nodded. "There's bravery in being soft."
"Am I soft?"
I nodded so he chuckled.
"Let's be afraid, Vivienne. Be afraid but do it anyway."