Two hours of grueling birth came and went in a blur, and with one final push, Silica's child was finally born.
The ringing in Silica's ears was replaced by the sound of a child's wails, and she felt herself become overwhelmed by her own emotion at it's cry. Her vice grip on Erwin and Levi's hands released, and she finally fell back into the pillow that supported her back as her tense body went limp in relief.
"It's a boy!" Reos couldn't help her own excited smile as she wrapped Silica's newborn son in a towel after Mike had cut him free of his umbilical cord.
"I have a brother!" Amelia thrust her firsts in the air at the news, and hopped around in a circle as Reos rounded the bed to finally give Silica her son. "I have a brother!"
Everyone who was present to witness the birth couldn't help but laugh at Amelia's happy dance, and Silica couldn't contain her tears when she finally caught a glimpse at her child's face.
His hair was as black as her's, and his cheeks were a rosy hue that reminded her of Ama when she was a baby. He had a sour look on his face as he fussed, but he quickly calmed down when Silica held him close to her chest; where he could hear the familiar sound of her heartbeat.
"He's beautiful," Mike grinned as he leaned beside Silica with a gentle hand held around their son's head. "He's perfect."
Silica could only manage to nod quickly in agreement, and when Ama came up to Silica's right side to see her brother's face, Silica angled him in a way that provided her a better view of him.
"He looks just like you, Mama." Amelia said whilst rubbing the side of her finger against his chubby hand.
Erwin stood a little ways behind Amelia, smiling to himself as he watched Silica fawn over her baby. Levi stood to his right with his arms crossed over his chest, seeming just as relieved as the rest of them that baby boy was as healthy as they were all hoping for.
"He's going to be a strong boy." Erwin said, not breaking his gaze from the baby.
"Silica is his mother, of course he's going to be," Levi agreed and glanced up at him. "Especially if you're one of the people to raise him."
At that, Erwin returned his gaze with a questioning one of his own.
"Oh, please, don't look so confused," Levi dismissively rolled his eyes, tone hushed so only Erwin could hear. "You know as well as I do that you two are going to end up together."
"That's not for certain," Erwin said. "It's all on Silica's terms. I want what she wants."
"You two are hopeless," Levi shook his head. "It's only a matter of time, and we all know it."
Erwin frowned at Levi's back as he reentered the group, and Erwin was left to stand from the sidelines, watching as Silica and Mike looked down at their son with adorning looks in their eyes.
"Do we have a name for him?" Reos asked as she flipped through Silica's chart.
Silica and Mike exchanged glances, and with a nod from Silica, Mike faced the doctor.
"His name is Lucas."
"Zacharias?" Reos asked as she wrote his name down.
"Ackerman," Silica corrected. "He's taking my family's name."
Mike merely agreed silently, and at the lack of objection, Reos scribbled down his full name in the chart and left it to hang on the foot of Silica's bed.
"Alright," the doctor said," it's time to get this space and Mister Lucas Ackerman cleaned up. I'm gonna need everyone to clear out to give Mom and baby some alone time."
"Bye-bye baby brother," Amelia cooed at him and waved as she took Levi's waiting hand. "See you soon. Bye, Mama."
Silica smiled warmly at her and Levi as they left the room, gave Mike a nod after he placed a kiss on Lucas' head, and looked up to Erwin as she handed off her baby to Doctor Reos.
"You've been awfully quiet," Silica observed as she was helped by a nurse to stand while two others proceeded in changing the sheets on the bed. "Are you okay?"
"Hm? Oh, yes, I'm fine," Erwin gave her a brief, reassuring smile. "I was only worried."
"Well me and the kid are fine now, so quit being so sullen." Silica had a joking tone to her voice, but for some reason, Erwin couldn't bring himself to smile at it like he normally would have.
"I'll visit again soon, Silica," he said as he turned to leave. She offered him a concerned look. "Get some rest."
Silica opened her mouth to object to him leaving, but he was gone before her words hit the air. She stared at the doorway in which he left through, and only took a step when the nurses who held her up motioned that she start walking.
"Let's get you cleaned up, Captain," one said when she offered her a disapproving look. "The quicker you two are clean, the faster you can be together again."
Silica thus reluctantly followed along, with Erwin and her new son at the forefront of her mind.
__________
Several hours had passed since Lucas' birth, and the baby in question laid swaddled and fed between Silica's legs, fast asleep as she looked over him. She watched as his little chest rose and fell. The way his tiny brow scrunched together in a soft scowl as he dreamed. She had a seemingly permanent smile on her face as she looked at him, and thanked whoever would listen that he suffered no complications. He was as healthy as could be; a sweet, content, perfect baby boy.
It was the early hours of the morning on base, and she found herself unbothered at the fact that she was running on no sleep. The adrenaline that pumped through her veins when her water broke felt as if it still coursed through her body as she sat there with Lucas, and sleep felt like a far off hassle that she couldn't be bothered with, not if it took time away from him, even if he himself were asleep.
Silica jumped slightly at the sound of the med bey's doors opening, and was happy to see Erwin's head of blond hair poking in to look at her.
"You should be asleep." Was the first, quiet thing he said as he entered the room. For whatever reason, it made Silica's smile widen, and she chuckled.
"I'm not tired," she said simply, and looked back down to Lucas as he shifted within his wrapped blanket. Erwin came up to her side. "I just want to watch him."
Erwin sighed as he pulled up a chair, his laced hands resting on the side of the bed beside Silica's legs as he sat down.
"Why doesn't that surprise me?" He asked, offering Silica a quick glance. She scoffed.
"What're you doing here so early, anyway?" She asked, changing the subject.
Erwin was quiet for a moment long enough to get Silica to look at him. His gaze was resting on Lucas, and a look she couldn't quite place was present on his face. She rose her hand to set it on his shoulder.
"Do you want to hold him?" She asked.
"He's asleep," Erwin shook his head without looking up. "I don't want to disturb him."
"Oh, please, he sleeps like a rock," Silica said dismissively, and leaned forward to scoop Lucas up into her arms. She held his still sleeping form out to Erwin, who still seemed hesitant. "Come on. I can tell you want to."
Erwin pursed his lips at her, but awkwardly held his arms out for him anyway. Silica smiled again at his mannerisms, and as she passed Lucas off to him, she helped to adjust Erwin's arms to hold the baby comfortably — and throughout all the movement, Lucas remained fast asleep.
The feeling that spread in Erwin's chest as he held Lucas for the first time was something he couldn't quite describe. It was a mix of overwhelming joy and fear that he may hurt him somehow. The breath Erwin held in his lungs slowly released as he looked down at his face, and Silica tucked her loose hair behind her ear as she grinned.
"That's better." She said softly as she looked at them.
"What is?" Erwin asked in a whisper, returning her stare, perplexed.
"You don't seem as tense now," she clarified. "What's on your mind? I know something's wrong."
"I..." Erwin trailed off and let his gaze fall, sighing. "I'm alright, Silica."
Silica angled her head down to catch his eye, lips pursed in doubt. "You're a terrible liar, Brows, you know that?"
Erwin shook his head at her, and gently rocked Lucas as he wiggled in his arms. Silica too sighed whilst kicking her legs over the side of the bed, and slowly slipped off to stand. She maneuvered herself behind Erwin with her arms wrapped around his shoulders, and lowered her head beside his as she tightened her grip around him. She felt the tense muscles of his back loosen.
"Can I guess, then? If you won't tell me," she asked softly. Erwin didn't respond. "You don't know where you fit in here, do you?"
Erwin chewed on the inside of his cheek, mildly annoyed at Silica's ability to read him like an open book. Truthfully, he didn't know where he belonged in Silica's life, and despite wanting to have a definitive answer, he wouldn't push her for one, not with everything she had been dealing with or what she'll still have to when she's recovered.
At Erwin's silence, Silica knelt down beside him with a hand on his cheek. She gently moved him to face her, and she smiled up at him warmly as he gazed down at her.
"I know it's been crazy," she began. "And I know I've been distracted and I appreciate your patience with... well, us. But I want you to know that I'm not going anywhere, and I hope you aren't, either."
"Silica..." Erwin's brow narrowed, but before he could finish his thought, Silica rose up and gently kissed his lips.
He leaned into her as soon as contact was made, and when they parted, Erwin's eyes stayed closed for a few seconds before they fluttered open to meet her's again.
"I know that I want you," she said, voice no higher than a whisper. "I know that I want you to be apart of this little guy's life — apart of Ama's life. You mean everything to me."
"And you, to me." Erwin replied, and kissed the palm of the hand Silica still held on his cheek.
As their tender moment came to an end, Lucas began to fuss in Erwin's arms as he awoke from his nap. Silica was quick to coo at him as she took Erwin's place in holding him, and rocked him slowly as she stood up straight.
Erwin watched with a phantom smile on his face at the way Silica talked to him. The names she called him, the way she asked him questions as if he could respond to her. Watching Silica be a mother was one of the most noble things he had ever seen. She was caring and stern and sweet, and so much more that made her so well versed in raising a child. He could only imagine how well Lucas would turn out with her guidance, and felt a warmth spread through him at the thought of being able to be there to see it all unfold.
His love for her was certain, and his love for her children was, too.