Penelope.
"Harry? Are you good to go?" I asked as I hastily zipped up my duffle bag and ran around the Airbnb that we had rented for the night.
Harry was in the bathroom still, shaving his stubble off. He hummed in confirmation of my question before I heard his shaving machine being turned off and he hurried out of the bathroom, "Yep, I'm done. Got everything?"
"Yeah." I breathed, glancing around, "I think so. Fuck, I can't believe we overslept that much."
"Has your dad called yet?" Harry asked as he yanked on his shoes and I put my coat on, pulling my hair out of the neckline, "Yes, twice."
"Shit." He muttered, "Alright, let's go."
It was nearing twelve when Harry and I hopped down the stairs of the Airbnb and ran outside. We were supposed to meet my dad and Nicole about an hour ago but Harry and I had horribly overslept on this second Christmas day. Also, we were both hungover and moody after having slept in a the most uncomfortable bed.
My back was sore and my head was pounding as we walked through the empty Brighton streets. Some of the snow had melted by now but our steps still sounded crunchy and winter-y as we approached my childhood home. Harry stifled a yawn as we were at the front door after pushing our bags into the trunk of his car which was still in the driveway.
Last night, the two of us, Dave and my dad had all cracked open the whisky bottle. Nicole had scolded us from the start but we had assured her we'd be fine. I was sure she'd have a field day seeing the bags under our eyes today.
Dave had the worst of it though, he was very drunk and ended up crashing on the couch at my dad's house. I wasn't sure if he'd still be there. Maybe Rory had kicked him out already.
Harry and I planned on a lunch with my dad and Nicole before we headed to Maycroft Manor and then drove back to London.
Harry lazily leaned into me when we waited for someone to open the door, him yawning once more and letting out a sigh, "I'm never drinking again."
"Me neither." I grumbled along, "And prepare yourself, Rory is never tired."
Harry whined, shortly kissing my jaw before he stood up straight. I turned my head to see him, a small smile on my lips when I saw his tired, adorable face. He wore jeans and another knitted, cosy jumper today, "You forgot a little patch." I brushed my fingertip over a couple of hairs on his jaw that he hadn't shaved off.
"No, I didn't. This is my new look." He joked in denial right before the door opened.
"Hi guys!" Nicole widely grinned as she ushered us into the house, "Come in, come in."
"Sorry we're late." Harry started apologizing, "We horribly overslept."
I shrugged off my coat and continued walking inside the house, running a hand through my loose brown hair. My dad was seated at the table with a glass of water in front of him, a tired look in his face.
"Hey, dad." I smiled, standing behind him and hugging him from the back, "How're you feeling?"
He patted my arm, "Like an old man who shouldn't be drinking that much at his age." He complained and then shook Harry's hand before turning to me, "How about you, darling?"
"Same." I sighed, "Harry and I didn't sleep at all. The bed in the Airbnb was horrible." I stretched my back as both Harry and I sat down at the table, "Please tell me there's coffee."
"Of course." Nicole smiled as she poured both of us a large cup that made both Harry and I groan in delight. She glared at my dad though, "You can get your own."
I chuckled under my breath. Nicole definitely had the upper hand in this household and she always scolded my dad when he drank a little too much. He sighed in defeat, "Can I not even get a cup of coffee on a hungover day like this?"
"Nope." She sharply responded, and then we were interrupted by my sister who ran down the stairs. Her face lit up when she saw Harry, "Hi, Harry!"
My eyes widened when she flung herself around his neck and he fell back into his chair a little as he awkwardly palmed her back, "Hey. You're very energetic."
"And loud." My dad groaned, rubbing circles into his temples.
My sister absolutely loved Harry. She was constantly raving about him, it was cute to be honest. She had always gotten along with Patrick but it was in more of a caregiver way. I felt like she saw Harry as more of a friend. She was a lot goofier and funnier around him, whereas the usually asked Patrick to help her with things.
It was just a different dynamic.
She had been glued to him all day yesterday, asking him to play football with her, asking him about his life, asking him to tell her jokes. Once he said he taught kids her age in school, she was about to bombard him with math questions. I luckily talked her out of it, explaining that Harry was on holiday and that he dealt with stuff like that enough already during his work time.
When Harry told the story about the science room explosion, Aurora had listened with wide eyes. He made it sound more heroic than it was, but I let him have his moment of fame as Aurora gasped and fawned over how he saved that one teacher. It gave me a glimpse of how Harry was on his job, and it was safe to say that he was really good with children. It made me smile. And it made my ovaries confused.
"Has Dave left a long time ago?" I asked as I drank some coffee. Nicole nodded, "Mhm. He barfed in our toilet, then cleaned it and then his dad picked him up."
"Oh god." I groaned as I palmed my forehead, "I'm so sorry."
"Classic Dave." Harry chuckled, relaxing into his chair as he sat in between my dad and Aurora at the circular kitchen table. The vibes in the house were a lot chiller today. The garden was kind of trashed but they had time to clean, and the atmosphere was very calm and ordinary. Like any other day in this household, we sat around the table to have lunch together.
But I liked that Harry was here for that, and not just for the very special things. I wanted this boring, ordinary life with him.
"What time are you headed to your mum's?" Dad asked as we all ate some toast. I glanced at the clock, "After lunch probably. Still have to drive back to London as well. We're not spending another night in that Airbnb."
Harry hummed in agreement and my dad chuckled, "Well, I hope she has a good day for you, darling."
"Me too." I slowly nodded, picking at my food.
Aurora looked at me in confusion, "Your mum?"
I smiled at her and nodded, "Yeah, my mum."
She pointed at Nicole and then frowned deeper and I chuckled, "No, baby. Your mum's not my mum. We've been over this."
Somehow it got very confusing for Aurora that we were half sisters and didn't have the same parents. She looked at me like I was an alien, "Where is your mum?"
"My mum is somewhere else, where people take care of her." I softly explained and she still didn't really seem to understand, "And dad?"
"My dad is your dad." I nodded, "But my mum is not your mum."
"Huh..." My sister mumbled under her breath as she slowly munched on her toast, a thick frown embedded in her forehead. Harry had a bit of an amused look on his face as he eyed her reaction and then shot me a small wink from across the table.
Now that it was just the five of us, my dad and Nicole had the chance to get to know Harry a little better. There were so many people here yesterday that they didn't actually talk all that much, so now came the classic questions like where he grew up, what his parents were like, if he had siblings, how we met and stuff.
My dad's face lit up when he heard we were going to Amsterdam in a couple of weeks.
"Amsterdam, really? Have some fun memories there..." He mused out loud and I turned my head to see him, "You went there before? Got any tips?"
He shrugged, "Not really, it's been a very long time. But it's a great city, lots of bikers. And it has all these canals, very fun to walk around. And pot is legal there."
"What's pot?" Aurora piped up and all of our eyes widened while Nicole nearly had an aneurysm, "Ben!" She scolded sharply and my dad cleared his throat, "I, um – I meant post. Post, yeah. You can mail your letters for free, no stamps." He lied through his teeth and I bit down on my lip to keep myself from laughing out.
Harry's shoulders shook with a silent chuckle as he tried his best to keep it down and Nicole glared at my dad. Rory didn't seem to have a care in the world as she used both hands to bring her cup of milk to her lips to greedily drink from it.
It was around two thirty in the afternoon that Harry and I said our goodbye's. Dad and Nicole made me promise to visit more often, while Rory seemed more torn up about Harry leaving than me leaving. I basically had to drag him away from her and then he was gushing about Rory during the car ride.
We were on our way to Maycroft Manor by now, the trunk once again filled with our bags as we sat in the heated seats of Harry's Volvo.
"I swear, she looks so much like you." Harry commented, "And she's got some of the same mannerisms too. You'd never guess you guys have different mums, you're like twins."
I chuckled at him, "I'm not as annoying as her."
"You can be a bit of a brat sometimes." Harry teased and I squeezed his thigh harshly, "Only if you act like a dick."
His laugh rang through the car and I glanced to the side, seeing him with a small smirk on his lips as he kept his eyes on the road. He definitely looked less hungover now that we had eaten and had some coffee and I had to admit that I was feeling a lot better too.
"I'm going to be so happy to sleep in my own bed tonight." I sighed, closing my eyes for a few seconds as we were driving through Brighton. Harry softly cleared his throat as he took a turn, "Are we... sleeping separately?"
My eyes opened again as I looked at him and I fidgeted in my seat a little, "I'd prefer not to."
"Okay." He nodded, "Me neither. Your place or mine?"
I shrugged, "It's all the same. But I'd like to see Katie again."
"Your place is good." Harry agreed, "Mitch and Sarah are still with his folks anyways."
My brows quirked up, "Does that mean... an empty apartment?"
"It does." Harry confirmed as he sped up a little and I pressed my lips together in contemplation, "So... we could have sex without having to be quiet?"
Another laugh from Harry, which caused me to blush a little as he shook his head, "I've definitely corrupted you, turned you filthy."
"Maybe I was always this way?"
"Doubt it." Harry smirked, both hands on the steering wheel, "So the choice is yours, Penelope... Seeing your friends or having loud sex?"
I held my breath for a second, "How horrible of a person would I be if I chose sex?"
Harry cackled in amusement, "Not horrible at all. But we could combine the two, no? We could fuck at your place and we'll just be quiet. It's kind of thrilling to know we could get caught." His hand blindly reached up and his fingertips touched my parted lips, "Or I could gag you. I know how much you like that."
My cheeks heated up and I cleared my throat as I stared straight ahead again. My silence seemed to amuse Harry and I was sure he was about to tease me further but we pulled up at Maycroft Manor. The atmosphere in the car shifted immediately once he had parked the car, and worry and concern flashed through his face.
I realized that this was one of the things that I loved so much about him. He could go from sexual teasing to being the world's best boyfriend in about two seconds. Nothing was off limits with him and he was perfect in every way. I knew he was worried about me seeing my mum, to see what state she'd be in. He knew how hard it was for me to see her sometimes.
His hand reached for mine, "Are you okay, baby?"
I shot him a forced smile, convincing myself in the process, "Yeah. Let's do this."
The white, hospital-like halls of Maycroft Manor had been decorated for the holidays. The place still felt dreadful to me but it was less bald and empty this way. I smiled widely when I noticed Skylar behind the desk and she immediately got up to her feet with an equally big smile, "Penny!"
"Hi." I grinned, pulling her in for a short hug, "Happy holidays, Skylar."
"You too." She murmured back before we untangled. Skylar was my mum's main caregiver and I had known her for years. We had quite a few phone calls and she had sat consoling me in one of the empty rooms so many times that I honestly considered her a friend by now.
"Sky, this is Harry, my boyfriend." I motioned to Harry and they shook hands, "Nice to meet you." She smiled at him and he returned it, "Likewise."
"Harry, Skylar is my mum's main nurse."
My smile faltered a bit as nerves flew around my stomach, "How is she today?"
Skylar cleared her throat, "She's not lucid. But she's in a good mood. I think she's up for visitors, your aunt was here yesterday and it went well. She had a bit of a freak out on Friday because we left the calendar up in her room and it said the year was 2021 and she's convinced we're in 2005."
"2005..." I frowned, "So I'm seven?"
"Yes." Skylar sighed, shooting me a small sympathetic smile, "She'll have no idea who you are but you can talk to her if you like."
I slowly nodded, feeling Harry's affectionate hand on my lower back as if to silently soothe and comfort me, "Okay."
I knew this was foreign to him. He wanted to be there for me but didn't know how, yet his presence was more than enough for me to feel safe and supported. Skylar led us through the familiar hallways as she explained some of the decorations to us. She always did this, going in first to check with my mum and tell her she had visitors. My mum would then decide if she wanted to see us or not.
I anxiously waited outside the door that said 'Susan Martin' on it, the door where I had been standing in front of so many times throughout the years. Harry noticed my restlessness, brushing his fingertips over my jaw, "We can leave whenever you want, baby."
"I know." I breathed, shooting him a small smile, "I just hope I don't fuck it up."
"What do you mean?" He frowned.
"If she's in moods like this, I can't let slip that I'm her daughter or that she's my mum. She'll freak out because the timelines don't add up and she gets in a panic. So I basically have to pretend that I don't know her either and it gets difficult sometimes."
Harry's eyes flashed over in sympathy, his other hand slipping into my open coat so he could hold my waist, "I can only imagine... You're an angel for doing this, you know? Strongest person I've ever met."
I quickly pecked his lips, calming down so much whenever he was with me. His scent felt so familiar, the warmth of his palm through my clothes felt like the most comfortable blanket and his eyes were my favourite colour. My heart was overcome with love for him, an emotion so strong it could make me cry and laugh at the same time.
I love you just didn't cut it with him. There weren't enough words in the English language – or any language – to explain how much he meant and it felt frustrating that I'd never be able to properly express it to him.
I was drowning in the sage green shade of his irises when the door behind me opened again and Harry and I broke apart. Skylar shot us a smile and a nod, "She's ready for you."
I took a deep breath and nodded, "Thanks, Sky."
"You know where the bell is if you need anything." She squeezed my shoulder shortly and then walked away. Harry was right behind me when I knocked on my mum's door and then opened it.
"Yes?" Her voice sounded a little confused as I opened the door and she was in her chair by the window again, knitting as usual. There was a small wrinkled frown on her forehead as she eyed both Harry and I, "Hello, there."
"Hi." I smiled, trying to keep my emotions under control. Part of me wanted to fling myself at her and hug her tightly and sob into her neck, but I kept a fair distance, "I'm Penny and this is my boyfriend, Harry. Can we sit with you for a bit?"
My mum carefully looked at us, up and down and then back up again. She eventually slowly nodded, "Alright. Do you two want some tea?"
"Yes, that'd be nice." I nodded, shrugging my coat off and Harry following my example. We decided to sit in the double couch opposite her. I could feel her eyes on me, a puzzled look on her face. She always looked at me like that and I knew I had to be somewhat familiar to her, but she would never remember where she had seen me before.
"What did you say your name was, dear?" She asked after a silent minute. I shifted in the couch a little, "Penny, and this is Harry."
She hummed and nodded, "I have a daughter named Penny."
My face lit up a little and I felt Harry squeezing my shoulder, "You do?"
"Yes." My mum sighed, "She's a handful. And her name is actually Penelope but she insists on calling herself Penny." She spoke with an eyeroll and Harry snickered from next to me while I slightly smiled as well.
"She's about to turn eight." My mum continued, "I'm sure she's off somewhere with my husband right now, checking out birds or something. Ben is quite into that."
"Her name is Penelope too." Harry nudged his head in my direction and my mum raised her brows, "Yet you go by Penny? My dear, why would you do that? Penelope is such a nice name."
I felt the need to roll my eyes at them bonding over my full name and I just cleared my throat, "It's too long and I don't know... Penny is just easier."
My mum scoffed a little, continuing her knitting, "You sound just like my Penelope. But she'll get it when she's older. No lawyer's office has the name 'Penny Warren' on it. 'Penelope Warren' sounds so much... better." She concluded.
"She's going to be a lawyer?" Harry carefully asked as I felt a little uncomfortable in the couch. It had always been my mum's dream for me to continue in her footsteps and become a lawyer like her. I often laid awake at night wondering if she'd be disappointed in me if she knew what I did for a living now.
My mum eagerly nodded, "Well, yes. She'll take over my practice. Ideally, her last name was Martin as well but Ben protested against that for some reason." She sighed while shaking her head, "That man can be so traditional sometimes."
Skylar knocked on the door, coming back in with a tray of cups and steaming hot water for the tea, "Here you go, Susan." She smiled at my mum who just nodded, "Thank you, Sky."
"So, tell me about you two." My mum spoke after Harry had poured all of us some tea. We glanced at each other when we were back on the couch, and my mum's eyes lingered on Harry's arm around me.
"Well, I'm a teacher in grade school and Penelope works in fashion. We both live in London." Harry briefly explained and my mum nodded, "Mhm. And how long have you two been together for?"
Harry and I shared a look, both clearing out throats. That was always a tricky one. Technically we had only been together for like a week.
"A couple of months." Harry responded vaguely but my mum didn't seem to mind, "And how old are you?"
"I'm 23 and Harry's 25." I smiled and she gasped, "And you're not married yet?"
I fought the urge to roll my eyes, "No, we're a little too young for that."
My mum huffed, "I was long married at your age." She then turned her head towards Harry, "Young man, you better put a ring on that."
Harry chuckled from next to me, "I plan on it."
I blushed fiercely on the couch, softly elbowing him in the ribs, "Let's just... take it slow."
"Why?" My mum sounded confused as she looked at me, "He's a catch, isn't he? I can only hope my Penelope would come home with a man like him one day."
I flicked my eyes to Harry, who fought his smile. Subconsciously, this was my mum approving of him and we both knew it. I squeezed his thigh softly, shooting him a smile as well. He visibly relaxed after that, knowing that in one way or another, my mum thought he was a right fit for me even if it was just the one short sentence.
The three of us simultaneously took a sip of our teas before my mum talked again, "I should advise you not to have kids too early though."
I stiffened on the couch a little, knowing full well what was to come. It was never a secret that my parents had me by accident. My mum definitely didn't plan on falling pregnant with me at the age of 26, especially since she was just starting out as a lawyer and put her career first.
"If I could've chosen the timing, I would've waited with having Penelope until... now or something." She continued, "It definitely put a strain on my career."
"What's she like?" Harry questioned and my mum's lips twitched up in a small smile, "I love her a lot."
I felt my eyes growing glossy at my mum's clear affection for me. I wished I could tell her, I wished I could tell her I was her, that I was her daughter. That I could see that flash of recognition in her face and that we could reunite and hug and cry. It had been years. Even the last time, she didn't really recognize me and was out of it by a couple of years.
I wanted her to know me, who I was right now.
"She's very funny, and quite loud. She takes after her dad quite a bit, which is good I think. He raises her for the most part. Ben is a really good dad, I just get stuck in the office often so I don't spend as much time with her as I should." She shrugged, "But she's good. She's patient and kind and gentle with the people she cares about."
There was a tight lump in my throat as I forced a smile and my mom shook her head to herself, "I can't wait to watch her grow up, I'm really curious to know what she'll be like as a teen or an adult. It's kind of great to watch the mini version of yourself grow up."
"Excuse me." I choked out, "I'll be right back." I stammered a little, quickly getting up my feet and bolting out of the room. I felt both Harry's and her eyes on me as I hurried out, gasping out choked breaths once I was in the hallway.
People were walking me by as I leaned against the white wall of the hallway in Maycroft Manor, wondering once more why this would ever happen to us. It was times like these that I felt so completely hopeless and powerless. My mum was there but she wasn't really. It's like I wanted to shake her shoulders and tell her to wake up. I hated her looking at me like I was a stranger. There was always some recognition there, like she remembered me faintly from some time in the past.
But there was never a time where I popped my head in and she was excited and enthusiastic to see me. It was always careful, having to get to know each other all over again. She introduced herself as if I didn't know blindly who she was.
I yearned for my actual mother.
Silent tears streamed down my face as I took a breather. I was thankful Harry was with me and that he could stay and occupy my mum while I was having a breakdown. Hearing her say she wanted to see me grow up, broke my heart. Because she never did. She knew parts of my childhood but her Alzheimer's kicked in so early and there were definitely a lot of holes in her memory. I'm pretty sure that the time she's talking about – around the year 2005 – are her final clear memories.
She didn't get diagnosed and admitted here until I was around 13 years old, but the years before that weren't good either. My dad kept me away from her a little because he didn't trust her around me. He actually feared she could hurt me in a panic when her mind went blank.
It was heart breaking to know that she wanted to know me and I wanted to know her, but it would never happen. It couldn't.
I wiped my cheeks to get rid of the tears while I tried to control my breathing. I didn't want her to notice I had been crying, because she'd ask and I couldn't explain. Not without freaking her out.
I stayed in the hallway for a little while, just trying to calm myself down. I heard laughter from inside the room sometimes and I just knew Harry was charming the shit out of her. My mum always liked Patrick whenever she had a lucid moment and I mentioned him. He never actually saw her. He never came here with me, he didn't think it was important since she wasn't lucid. On the other hand, he'd scold me for not visiting her enough.
My mum only knew him from stories I told and she was crazy about him, much like Rory was. I guessed on paper he sounded like the perfect match. A high degree, a wealthy family, good manners. But hearing her laugh with Harry meant so much more to me.
She loved him. He was so easy to love.
I pushed myself off of the wall and took a deep breath before heading back inside. Harry's face contorted in worry when he eyed me and I forced a smile. I was sure he could see right through me but my mum didn't seem to notice anything, "Everything alright?" She checked.
I nodded and she left it at that, "Harry here was just telling me how the two of you met. As I understand, it's had to do with a lot of sex."
My cheeks blushed furiously as I sat mortified on the couch, "W-What?"
My mum smirked, "Not to worry, dear. We've all done it."
"Oh god." I winced in cringe, really not feeling the need to hear her talk about her sex life to me. I knew that to her I was just a stranger so it wasn't that strange of a topic. I supposed Harry figured it out as well, which is why he told her in the first place.
Harry's thumb rubbed gentle circles in my shoulder as I relaxed on the couch again. My mum had started mentioning anecdotes from me at the age of seven. I was a hilarious kid, so it seems, and apparently a lot like Aurora was now. I tried to push it to the back of my head that she was actually talking about me, that these were real memories for her.
Most of that stuff, I couldn't remember at all. The three of us were laughing and joking constantly until it grew dark outside and it was around five in the evening. Harry and I shared a look and both nodded. He cleared his throat, "Well, Susan, it was really nice to catch up with you but Penelope and I should get going now."
"Oh." Her face dropped a little but she nodded, "Of course, the two of you need to get back to London. I suppose my Penelope and Ben will get back here soon as well, can't see many birds when there's no light." She joked.
I got up to my feet, dread filling me upon realization I had to leave her. Again. I shifted on my stance a little, unsure of whether to hug her or not. I'd only do it if she invited me to, or if she initiated it.
But she didn't. She just nodded at us from across the room, still in her chair as usual while the dark blue knitting was on her lap. Harry's hand was on my back again, softly resting in between my shoulder blades but constantly reassuring me that he was here and he was with me. It felt like support, and it felt like I needed it more than I realized.
We said our goodbye's to my mum and I hesitated before walking out, nibbling on my lip. There was so much I wanted to say, so much I wanted to ask. Eventually I let out a breath, forced one more smile her way before I turned around and followed Harry out.
My shoulders dropped the second I left the room and closed it behind me, and Harry turned around with worried eyes. I couldn't keep it in. My bottom lip quivered and his arms were around me before I even realized I needed it.
"Fuck." I whispered as I circled my arms around his shoulders and buried my face in the crook of his neck, sniffing as he stroked his hands up and down my back, pulling me tightly into his chest.
I sobbed for a short moment, just finally letting out all the emotions. I always felt like this whenever I visited my mum. It was the main reason I didn't do it all that often, because it was so hard on me and felt so draining. I was absolutely exhausted now, mentally.
Harry softly shushed and coaxed me, his palms fully engulfing me and making me feel so safe that I could let it all out in the hallways of my mum's care facility.
I pulled back after a minute, ready to apologize to him for breaking down like that but I refrained myself. He wouldn't accept my apology anyway, he'd actually make me say I was not sorry and he'd reassure me it was a normal reaction and I wasn't being overly dramatic or emotional.
Care and sympathy dripped from his face as he cupped my cheeks and pressed a short kiss to my lips, "I'm so proud of you."
I slyly smiled and sniffled again, swallowing away the lump in my throat, "Thank you." I whispered back, squeezing his shoulders before I took another breath, "Can we go home now?"
"Of course." He nodded, assisting me in putting on my coat before he held my hand and we walked out together. We said our goodbye's to Skylar and the rest of the staff at the front desk, and the cold, fresh air felt nice to my lungs as we hurried back to the car.
The drive to London was easy and rather short in comparison to the drives we'd had in the past couple of days. A mere hour later, Harry pulled up in the driveway of my house. I saw Katie's and Liam's car here and I suspected Dave was still in Brighton. I had tried calling him today but he didn't answer his phone and I figured he was still sleeping off his hangover. He'd probably get here tomorrow.
I had let Katie know that Harry and I were coming home, just to make sure she and Liam weren't naked on the couch or anything when we walked in. My spirits were lifted by the time I slid my key into the front door. I always managed to put these visits with my mum into perspective after having my first initial emotional reactions. It always happened in the same way.
I could see how privileged I was to still be able to visit her, and I could see how nice of a visit it had actually been. She seemed happy and relaxed, which was a vast contrast to how panicked I had sometimes witnessed her in the past. Even though she was years and years out of it, it had been nice to chat with her and hear her talk about me and my dad.
It felt both crushing and uplifting.
"Hey." I smiled at Katie and Liam who were on the couch – with clothes on. Their faces lit up upon seeing Harry and I walk in and Katie immediately pulled me in for a hug, "Merry Christmas!"
I giggled as I hugged her back, "Merry Christmas. Missed you, how was your holiday?"
I put my scarf on the coat rack, Harry following my example as I kicked off my shoes and inhaled the familiar scent of my home. It always smelled like cookies and lavender here whenever Katie was around. I grinned at Liam and hugged him too while Katie responded, "Good! Liam and I got back here around noon."
Soon, we were all eating some leftovers on the couch while sipping a beer.
"Penelope called my mum Mrs. Styles." Harry was laughing again while Katie and Liam joined in with his cackles, leaving me to glare at him on the couch before I cleared my throat, "Harry had an orgasm in the hot tub and blamed the filthy water on his sister."
Katie's jaw dropped before she burst out in laughter again and it was Harry's turn to blush and feel embarrassed. Liam's shoulders shook in chuckles, "Really? What did you say?"
"He said she peed in it." I snorted, "and she was kind of drunk so she doesn't remember, so she takes his word for it."
"Oh my god." Katie laughed, her hand resting on Liam's thigh, "You guys had very eventful holidays."
"How'd it go with your sister?" Liam asked me and I snorted, "She loves Harry more than I do. She was literally more sad that he was leaving than that I was leaving."
"Ah," Harry teased, "You've been replaced as her favourite person, huh?"
"There's literally only one criterium for her to like you, and it's that you're not Dave." Katie chuckled and I laughed along, "True. She really hates him for no good reason."
"I think we could all come up with a couple of reasons to dislike Dave." Liam joked and Harry immediately rolled his eyes, "His medieval stance on sex. He's one to talk, honestly..."
We all softly snickered and nodded, and the evening went by pleasantly with the four of us in this house. Soon, we were all yawning though and I felt my eyelids growing droopy. It was around ten in the evening and Harry caught on to my sleepiness.
"I think we're going to bed." He chuckled when he felt me resting my head on his shoulder. I hummed lazily in agreement and Katie and Liam both nodded as well, "Us too, I think. Been a long couple of days."
"You guys go ahead, we'll quickly clean and lock up." Liam assured us. I didn't need to hear that twice and I was quickly up on my feet and heading towards the stairs while Harry decided to get the bags from the car with our stuff in it. I was already in my pyjamas by the time he joined me in the bathroom, and we both got to brushing our teeth.
I convinced Harry in doing some skincare with me, and he sat down on the countertop while I put some products on his skin. He didn't complain even though he had never been much into that stuff. He had insanely good skin on his own – something I despised about him – and I explained the different serums and moisturizers to him and he hummed to let me know he was listening patiently.
Soon enough, we were both underneath the covers of my bed, engulfed in darkness and clung to one another.
We were on our sides, face to face with my one leg draped over his hip. The position felt incredible for my back and after the night we'd had with the horrible mattress, it felt good to lay down like this.
His lips were against my forehead as he felt my eyelashes fluttering against his chin each time I blinked.
Harry's fingertips danced over my spine after he had convinced me to sleep naked with him, both of us just wearing some underwear. There were few things that Harry loved more than having me so close to him and being able to feel my bare skin. The softness and the warmth of me brought a sense of comfort that he couldn't really explain.
It felt familiar to feel him touch every dip and ridge of my back, his fingertips following my spine up and down and tracing over my ribs. My arm was snugly and tight around him as well, my palm flat against my shoulder blade and my thumb tracing back and forth.
"What are your plans for New Year's eve?" He whispered in the darkness.
"We usually celebrate at Steve's. Nobody really wants to host and open up their homes, so we just go there and party a bit. Nothing too crazy." I softly explained.
He tightened his grip around my form and pecked my forehead, "That sounds nice."
"You're coming too, right?" I asked in clarification and Harry softly chuckled, "If you'll let me."
I smiled against his clavicle, "Of course."
"Can I say something really sappy? And you have to promise you won't make fun of me?" Harry asked after a silent minute. I frowned a little as I nodded, "Okay."
He paused for a second, exhaling a deep breath, "You're the best thing that happened to me this year."
I felt like my heart was in my throat, trying to claw its way out of me and jump at him when his words hit me. Harry felt me freezing for a bit and let out a breath, shortly kissing my forehead again, "Told you it was going to be sappy."
I shook my head as I untangled myself slightly to be more on eye-level with him, and then I cupped his cheek and firmly kissed him. Our lips were pressed together in a hard, long kiss and Harry dug his fingers into my back to pull me closer.
I love you, I love you, I love you.
I repeatedly kissed him until he was smiling so wide I was kissing his teeth. The faint light coming through my window lit up parts of his face and his eyes were lazy and glimmering. Even though we were half asleep, there was a part of him that was very awake and it was pressing against my thigh.
It seemed like my ways had rubbed off on him, because Harry too grew horny from intimate moments like these. Hearing the other talk like this, did it for the both of us.
"Hello, there." I teased and Harry snickered, "Don't worry about it, I know you're too tired."
I pouted slightly and brushed his hair back, tightening my leg around his waist to pull him closer, "But I want you."
Harry's smile dropped a little as he flicked his eyes down to my lips, stroking his palm up and down my naked back until he lowered it and it was resting on my ass, "Yeah?"
"Yes." I confirmed in a whisper, "Feels too good, always want you." I spilled, softly kissing his parted lips. First the top one, then the plump bottom one before I briefly licked along his bottom lip. Harry didn't do anything as I took it between my teeth gently, pulling a little until releasing and it snapped back into place.
"You want to feel my love, sweet girl?" Harry whispered, nudging his nose against my jaw until I tilted my head back and he had access to my neck. I hummed at his words, running my fingers through his hair as he nipped on my throat and peppered kisses on the arch and up to my ear, "Got a lot of emotions I'd like to show you. Not sure how to say it though."
I smiled to myself, my eyes fluttering close as he nibbled on my earlobe and I felt him panting against my neck, "Maybe body language is the answer."
"Maybe." I coyly answered and we both chuckled. Our smiles faltered when Harry brought his hand between us, softly touching me over my underwear. I was sure he could feel the wettened fabric beneath his fingertip and he gasped in a breath, "Always so ready for me." He praised and I closed my eyes when he traced his fingers up and down my slit through my underwear, "A-Always." I responded mindlessly.
"Love feeling you like this, baby. When you're waiting and aching for me, needy for my cock. So needy that your tight little cunt gets soaked." He hotly whispered and I felt the familiar shivers running up and down my spine from his filthy words.
Harry bent his legs around a little, sharply pushing his centre up into mine to make me feel the hard bulge in his boxers. I wasn't the only one who was aching. His fingers continued to brush over my core until I whimpered, "Harry – please... touch me..."
He hummed at my desperation but gave in immediately, twisting his fingers to crawl under the seam of my knickers and feel me without restriction. My back arched immediately at the contact. His fingers were a little cold and I was very hot. Harry spread my wetness around, panting against me as he mindlessly shifted his hips around to the rhythm of his fingers stroking me.
"So fucking wet." He breathily mumbled, "all for me, kitten? Tell me what I do to you."
I fisted his hair, bucking my hips up for more but Harry didn't oblige this time, keeping his touches superficial and delicate while I was burning up. I licked my lips, "You drive me crazy." I admitted, "ever since that first time you touched me, got me hooked immediately. Never want anything else."
He groaned into my neck, finally slipping two fingers in. I keened at the touch, sighing out in relief as Harry pumped in and out, "God, I love you so much."
I smiled and hummed, "I love you t-too," my brows scrunched together when he curled his fingers, "fuck... just like that."
Another growl in my neck as he licked and kissed my skin, "Need you, need you, need you..." He whimpered, removing his fingers from inside of me and hastily yanking his boxers down to free himself. Only a second later I felt him pushing himself inside of me. I bit my lip and gasped at the sudden contact, feeling him stretch and fill me to perfection as always.
My toes curled, my heel digging into his ass as he slowly but surely filled me up completely until his thighs met mine. We kept still for a second, getting used and relishing in the feeling of being this close. Our lips met, tongues darting out and roaming each other's mouths as we hugged one another tightly.
I felt him pulsing inside of me, my pussy tightly gripping and welcoming him. We were tired and lazy, but the urge to feel him was always so overwhelming to me. There wasn't a feeling in the world that topped this, to have him touch me like that.
Harry grunted against my lips, "Fucking made for me... so tight and warm." He sighed, nuzzling his nose against my jaw before he slowly started moving. Our panting filled the air, bodies slowly rolling together as he pushed his hips up into me before sliding about halfway out.
I was quietly moaning, my fingers tightly in his hair as Harry clawed at my back to get me even closer. I liked the position more than I cared to admit. With my leg hooked over his hip, it gave Harry room to move while we had the intimacy of eye contact and the comfort of both lying down. He bent his top leg a little in between mine, giving him more leverage to thrust a little deeper.
"Yes – right there!" I whimpered when I felt him hitting me so perfectly, like always. Euphoria was coursing through my body when I felt my climax slowly building up. Harry breathed into my neck, "Yeah? Right there?" He thrusted sharply and I jolted up on the mattress, gasping in a breath in response.
Harry moaned against my skin, "Being inside you is my fucking favourite thing – never want to stop... My angel, fuckin' perfect." He slurred lazily, rolling his hips into mine. I cupped his cheeks to kiss him again, growing frustrated that I couldn't move around more.
I pushed against his shoulder, making him roll on his back as I rolled around with him. We stayed connected as I was now on top, straddling his hips and gaining all the control. Harry smirked at me as he laid down on his back, head relaxed into the pillows. His palms slid down my sides until he reached my ass and I hovered over him as I grinded back and forth.
One of my hands grabbed the headboard as my jaw dropped from the new angle, "Oh god..." I moaned, causing Harry to sharply slap my ass once. The smack made me jolt up and bite down on my lip and he smirked arrogantly before moving both hands to my hips to help me move on top of him. The smirk was quickly wiped from his face when I sat up straighter, feeling him curve inside of me in a completely different way.
My head rolled back on my shoulders when I felt him pushing into my g-spot, and I started moving up and down. My thighs burned from the workout but Harry screwed his eyes shut and parted his lips. I could see his abs flexing, could feel his fingers digging into my thighs as he throatily moaned, "N-No, baby – you're going to make me cum too fast." He rushed out and I slowed down a little.
I caught my breath as I went back to grinding, resting my palms on his chest for balance as I rolled my hips back and forth. The slick sounds of me working myself on top of him, filled the room and was yet another indication of how fucking wet I was.
"Pen – fuck," Harry gasped, "I'm not gonna last..." He seemed to hold out his own orgasm to a painful extent, edging himself and desperate to have me come first. I hummed at his words, "Hmm, want to feel you come inside of me... feels so good." I moaned out. It was true though. Feeling him release himself in hot spurts inside of me was one of the best things ever. It felt so intimate and raw, just our bodies reacting to one another.
He moved one hand, pressing his thumb against my clit which made me mewl and tense. The added stimulation made me near delirious, and I leaned my palms back on his thighs behind me, arching my back out as I snapped my hips forward.
"Please..." I pathetically whispered, unsure of what I was actually begging for. Harry sped up his thumb and used more pressure and I cried out, "Harry!".
His other palm slapped my ass once more, "Love it when you scream my name, kitten. Come on, cum for me."
As if I was an animal doing tricks on cue, I did. I came. My nails dug into his thighs as I tensed up, mouth open in a silent scream and eyes wired shut as my orgasm surprised me. Harry continued flicking his thumb over my clit as my thighs trembled and I clenched around his length. He grunted at the feeling, "Fuck, fuck, do that again!"
I did as he asked, tightening my muscles around his cock, feeling him throb inside of me. Harry's hips shifted beneath me, pushing himself up as his eyes rolled back and his jaw clenched, a harsh orgasm taking over his body. His cock twitched when he shot his load inside of me while I attempted to calm down on top of him.
My body was exhausted, and my limbs shook as I dropped down on top of him. He was still inside of me and my forehead was leaning on his shoulders. His heart was rapidly beating and I kissed over the skin of his chest repeatedly as he softly stroked my back.
"Jesus christ." I murmured tiredly and Harry's body shuddered in a chuckle beneath me, "My horny girl."
I hummed and smiled into his shoulder, "Don't pretend like it's a chore to fuck me."
"It's definitely not." Harry assured me, "told you that being inside of you is my fucking favourite thing to do."
I giggled and lifted my head to see him, biting down on my lip as we shared a soft, lazy kiss.
I winced a little as I lifted myself off of him and he slipped out of me. I was about to crawl off but Harry held onto my hips, keeping me steady in hovering over him. I cocked up an eyebrow and looked at him, seeing that he was intently staring back into my eyes with a soft smirk on his lips.
I swore I could see his eyes darken when his cum started dripping out of me. Our releases mixed together dropped down on his softened dick and belly. Harry made no attempts to move me, instead kept me in that very position until a pool of our releases was on his skin. He licked his lips and flicked his eyes down to mine, "I swear you're about to get me hard again."
"I'm not doing anything." I smiled and he hummed, "You don't have to." His eyes shortly glanced between us to see the pool of come on him, "that's so fucking hot."
I chuckled, "You can be on top if you want to go again, I don't think I have the energy to move anymore."
Harry's smirk grew and I knew he immediately took that as a challenge. His hands kneaded my hips, "I'm sure I could get you there again, baby. I'll have you begging for me in no time."
I squealed in surprise when he rolled us over and hungrily pressed his lips on mine, tongue immediately slipping out to roll around my mouth as my back rested against the mattress and he was on top of me.
I was definitely up for a long night.