Penelope.
I was woken up by Harry's lips peppering kisses down my jaw. I blinked my eyes open slowly to see him standing over me next to the bed, fully dressed and ready to head out.
I frowned immediately, "What time is it?" My voice was raspy and tired this early in the day.
"Shh," He coaxed me, "It's fine, little past eight. Have to get to work, baby. I set your alarm for eight thirty so you have time to shower and get ready."
I let out a breath as I rolled over in his bed so I could face him clearly, "Why didn't you wake me when you got up?"
Harry chuckled, "You looked too peaceful. Really have to go now... Make yourself at home, just close the door behind you when you leave, yeah? There's coffee in the kitchen, I'll see you tonight." He softly spoke, leaning down once more to press a kiss to my lips before he walked out.
I was barely awake enough to register that the front door closed and I was alone in the silent apartment. Apparently Mitch and Sarah had spent the night at her place. I rolled around the bed a little more, enjoying all of the space and the scent of the fresh sheets Harry must've still put on last night.
I didn't remember him doing that. My arms and legs stretched under the soft duvet and I found myself half naked again, just wearing a pair of Harry's boxers. I grunted as I laid on my stomach lazily, puffing out some air to blow away a strand of hair that obstructed my vision. He had opened the curtains just a little to let some natural light in, although it seemed a rather gloomy day.
My arm reached for my phone that was on the bedside table, and I squinted my eyes at the brightness of my screen, immediately turning off the alarm that Harry had set for about ten minutes later. I was awake enough now.
I only now realized how thoughtful Harry had been this entire morning. He had set my alarm, made me coffee and let me sleep as he silently slipped out of bed. I hadn't even heard his alarm going off, to be honest. He was such a sweetheart. And I felt like a complete bitch now for not thanking him before he left.
Message to: Model Man
Awake enough now to thank you for setting my alarm and making me coffee!! See you tonight, xx
I smiled to my phone when he immediately texted me back, and I checked my clock to see that his class started in a couple of minutes.
Message from: Model Man
No problem! I'll call you during lunch. Have a good day x
I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, feeling how tight my muscles in my thighs were and I knew exactly why. Harry had left me dangling on that edge for a good hour last night and it had very much worn out my muscles. I wasn't sore or anything, but just felt like I had climbed a mountain the day before.
I padded my way over to the bathroom to brush my teeth and have a quick shower, even though we took a bath the night before. I think. Honestly, it was all a big blur to me. I just remembered seeing Harry, like he was all I could see. I didn't even remember walking around or talking much, I was just... staring at him.
He had looked angelic with the white bathroom lights shining on him, accentuating the immaculate bone structure in his face as I couldn't help but admire him. It had all felt very floaty when I was incredibly aware of his presence, and only his presence.
In just his boxers, I stood in front of the mirror. I had braced myself for marks that I had to cover up, or bruises around my thighs. But my body was left in perfect condition and it was also then that I remembered that he had hardly touched me.
That fucker.
I would've never agreed to being tied up if I would've known he was about to punish me like that. I was blinded by lust when I walked into his apartment, blinded by my trust for him and so set on an orgasm that I'd let him do anything he wanted to me.
Watching him masturbate as I was left helpless on the bed, was torture. I wasn't even sure if I had really liked it, the punishment. It had been just as frustrating and torturous as it had been pleasurable. The edge of pain and pleasure had become thinner once more until the one flew over into the other.
I had never felt such an intense amount of relief as when my orgasm finally hit me. It was too much, I almost passed out. I was pretty sure I had screamed bloody murder when I finally hit that painful peak and the tension inside of me was smashed to pieces with one, toe curling blow. It wasn't wave-like as usual, it was one big explosion.
Everything after that was a blur.
The shower was brisk and short, but long enough to energize me for the day. I still felt a little dazed to be honest, and I could feel that last night had taken a lot out of me. Especially for a weekday. I blow-dried my hair and quickly straightened it a little before applying a little bit of make-up.
I took out the outfit I had packed for today, grey slacks, wool socks, black chunky loafers and a cashmere jumper with a large turtleneck to keep me nice and cosy today. I put on some minimal jewellery and then headed into the kitchen.
Harry's apartment was so nice. I loved the style of it, and I could clearly see which pieces were his and which were Mitch's. Harry's style was very minimalistic and basic, whereas Mitch was more eclectic and cosy. Overall, with the brick wall and the hardwood floors and the dark furniture, the apartment came across as homy and rustic.
I put myself down on the couch with my coffee and scrolled through my phone for a bit as I gradually woke up. It was fun to be on my own for a bit. My house was always so busy with Dave, and him inviting literally everyone over at all times. After the night I'd had, it felt good to have some silent time on my own to gather my thoughts.
I quickly toasted some bread and put on a bit of jam, popping the last bit in my mouth as I closed the door behind me. I chewed the last of my breakfast while taking the elevator down to the ground floor. I had parked out on the street and not in the underground parking garage this time, so my car was cold and sputtery when I turned the engine off.
I arrived at the office nicely on time, waving at a couple of colleagues as well as Carlo, who was already holding his head in his hands at this early hour.
It promised to be a busy day.
Harry did call me on his lunchbreak, and I lounged back in my desk chair as I answered his call, "Hey."
"Hi, am I interrupting?" He asked, slightly out of breath. I heard chattering behind him and smiled, "Not at all. How's your day?"
"Nothing out of the ordinary. It's cold though. Didn't have any issues with your car this morning, did you?" He asked and I shook my head, "It was fine, a bit slow but I'm used to that by now." I joked.
Harry breathily chuckled on the other end, "What time do you think you'll get off today?"
"Probably around six. Do you need me to go by the grocery store or something?" I asked and Harry paused for a bit, "I was thinking... Now that we're dating, right..."
"Right..." I smiled, urging him to continue, "Maybe I should take you on a proper date, then?"
I giggled into the phone, biting down on my lip, "I'd like that. What'd you have in mind?"
"Maybe... we could go out to a cute neighbourhood? Grab a meal together..."
I fake gasped, "A meal?! Wow..." I teased and Harry snickered, "Alright, alright..."
"Where do you want to go?" I smiled and Harry hummed in thought, "Hmm... It's been a while since I've been to Camden. It's nice there, used to go there a lot last year. I know a couple of places there that aren't that tourist-y."
"I've never gone to Camden much, sounds fun." I spoke.
"Should I pick you up at your office then? It's kind of on the way." He explained and I nodded, "Yep, sounds good. I'll leave my car here and take the tube to work tomorrow."
"Alright. Or maybe we can pick it up afterwards, we'll see. Text me when I should start driving down."
"I will." I grinned, "Have a good day, Harry."
"You too, P- um, Cinnamon. Bye."
I frowned at my phone as he suddenly hung up, but then it dawned on me that Dave was probably nearby and he didn't want to give anything away. I snickered to myself and continued working for a bit until Felix appeared again with our salads in his hands.
He had ordered us lunch since it was another day of no breaks and eating and working at the same time.
***
I smiled at Harry when he pulled up in front of my office. It was mostly dark already and I had been shivering on the curb for a bit as I waited for him. I assumed he had been stuck in traffic for a while since it was rush hour on a Thursday, but none of that mattered when he slowed down in front of the office doors and I quickly jumped into his car.
"Hey." I grinned, leaning over the console to quickly peck his lips. He smiled back, "Hi. How was your day?" He started driving again as I buckled up my seatbelt, "Fine, nothing special. Carlo was moody again."
"So really nothing special." Harry chuckled, already familiar with my boss' usual moods, "I brought your blazer by the way, it's in the backseat." Harry pointed behind him and I sighed, "Thanks, life saver. It's really quite cold today."
"Hmm, we'll be warmed up soon."
I relaxed in the comfortable seat of Harry's car as the traffic lights in front of us all turned red from people stepping on their brakes. I leaned into his side a little when Harry placed one hand on my thigh, squeezing gently as we continued our mindless chatter.
It felt like a proper date already, even more so when Harry insisted on opening up my car door for me once we were parked. I giggled at his playful mood as he courted me and even helped me put my coat on. I linked my arm with his as we walked the sidewalks of Camden town. I hadn't often been here since it was quite a drive away from Richmond and I never worked or studied in this area. I also didn't really have friends who lived here or anything, so I never had an excuse to come here.
It was rather crowded, but the cosy kind of crowded. We alternated in me having my arm linked in his, or him having his arm around my shoulder as we walked in sync and talked about random topics.
The city lights were nice and cosy as we made our way through some of the smaller streets. I let Harry guide me around mostly as I didn't know this neighbourhood at all. We eventually came to a stop in front of a small, cosy Italian restaurant. I let Harry take the lead as he walked up the few steps leading up to the door and we were met with a cosy warmth and the overwhelming heavenly scent of basil, garlic and tomatoes.
"Hi," He smiled at the waiter, "I called about an hour ago to book a table for two? Name's Harry Styles."
The waiter checked his little book by the cash register and nodded, a thick Italian accent lacing his voice, "Si, signore, signora, table is this way." He motioned his hand to the back of the restaurant and I followed him and Harry through the multiple small tables. It was crowded here, but the place was so small that it didn't feel too busy.
Our table was in the corner against the back wall and I shrugged my coat off to hang it over the back of my chair before sitting down with Harry. I glanced around the small restaurant, "This is so nice..."
"You like it?" Harry asked, "I used to come here sometimes with, um..." He stopped himself suddenly and I raised my brows, "With your ex? Harry, it's fine." I chuckled, "I don't mind if you talk about her."
He dropped his eyes a little, "Sorry, just thought it would be awkward."
"I talk about Patrick sometimes too, it's fine." I reassured him with a shrug and he nodded, "You're right. But yeah, me and Kiara used to come here sometimes."
"Did she live around this neighbourhood?"
"Mhm, she's from Camden." Harry confirmed.
"Ah, so that's why you know all the nice places here." I teased and he chuckled, "Haven't been here in a few months though. Think they changed owners, don't recognize any of the staff." He frowned slightly as he looked at the waiters walking around the restaurant.
"Thank you for this, by the way." I smiled, "This was a really good idea."
His face lit up a little as he beamed, "Yeah? Figured I should take you out on a real date."
"Mhm, it never dawned on me that we've never actually gone anywhere together."
"Well," Harry shrugged, "The office party. Let's be honest, usually we're stuck in bed."
I blushed slightly at his words but couldn't help but nod. He wasn't wrong.
"Did you sleep well?" He asked and I nodded, "I did. You?"
"Mhm," He smiled back, "You crawled on top of me immediately. I like it when you're in a cuddly mood."
"I was in a weird mood." I snorted and Harry tilted his head, "I think you were in your subspace?"
"Really?" I raised my brows, "What's that exactly?"
"I think it's experienced differently by everyone. It makes a person quite emotional and very aware, kind of like a trance-like euphoria of really intense emotions." Harry explained and I slowly nodded, "I don't really remember much. It sounds weird but... it's like you were the only thing that existed? I don't know, it's like I couldn't hear or see anything or anyone else."
Harry softly smiled as he reached his hand over the table, tracing his pointer finger over my fingertips that were next to my glass of wine, "You stared at me a lot. Like... admiring me."
"I'm always admiring you." I snickered, "I was really dazed and like... out of it. I couldn't really feel anything, no pain or frustration or annoyance or anything. Just... floaty and dizzy." I tried to explain and Harry hummed, "You were very out of it. Had me worried for a bit."
"Did I say stupid stuff?" I asked in confusion and Harry licked his lips, "Not stupid stuff. You didn't say anything for a while, and the things you did say didn't make much sense. You were just... staring a lot. And then we were in the bath and you came back a little, started saying I saved you." He chuckled as if it was a joke and I smiled along for a bit until it faltered, "You did, though. In a way."
"Think you saved yourself." Harry shrugged, "Told you that last night as well."
"I did save myself." I nodded, "At least a part of me. But you definitely helped. I don't know how to explain it without sounding incredibly sappy. But you, um –" I swallowed thickly, "you're really important to me, Harry. You mean a lot to me and you... How do I say this..." I muttered to myself as I searched for the right words, "you make me feel so free? And alive and just... happy."
Harry didn't say anything, just stared at me while he softly rubbed his hand against mine. I cleared my throat, "It's hard to put into words. I just feel good when you're around me, like I'm making sense? Like it just... clicks."
It did click. I wanted to say so much. I wanted to say that I knew when it came to him. I just knew. I felt it, it called me from the marrow of my bones, from the centre of my soul, it haunted me and begged me for more. I yearned so much to be loved by him. And what Harry brought for me was deeper than anything I thought was ever possible.
It went beyond everything. It's like he had always been a part of me, like we had always known one another. Even before we met, it was him like we had spent many lives together. Lifetime after lifetime.
Harry seemed to blush slightly as he smiled down, licking his lips, "I feel good when you're around me too."
We fell quiet again for a bit as we both sipped our drinks. Harry cleared his throat, "But, you weren't too tired for work or something today? Felt a bit guilty, seeing how heavy it was for you."
"You should feel guilty," I scolded slightly, "tricking me into something like that."
He laughed, squeezing my hand and I smiled along. Both our eyes flicked to his phone when it lit up, and I faintly saw the word 'Mum' from the upside down position. Harry glanced at it and let out a breath before turning over the screen.
"You can answer if you want."
He shook his head, "No, it's fine. I'll call her tomorrow."
"How did it go, by the way? When you visited? Was she happy to see you?" I asked as I took a sip of wine. I remembered him driving down to Cheshire a couple of weekends before. Once Gemma had visited him – even though I tried to forget that dreadful morning where she walked in – Harry had promised to go visit his mum before the holidays.
"Yeah," He nodded, "She's always happy to see me. She's been... clinging to me more again."
"How do you mean?"
Harry licked his lips, "Um, my stepdad died. A couple of years ago."
My lips parted as I stared at him in shock, "Harry... oh my god, I had no idea... I'm so sorry." I squeezed his hand back and he let out a breath, "No, I mean... I've grieved and worked through that. But my mum's been a bit lonely ever since. She adopted like... four cats since then." He chuckled.
"Cats are good company." I smiled back and Harry nodded, "Mhm. It just feels like I'm sixteen again. She calls all the time, wants to know everything about mine and Gem's life. Probably to distract herself, I don't know. I feel like I had just gotten used to her having her own life but now that he's gone, she's been clinging to us more."
I nodded, "That makes sense, yeah. Were you close with him?"
"Yes, he was really good to us. They'd been together quite a while, I was just used to him being there. It was hard when he passed."
My heart ached as I stared at Harry, who kept his eyes low. I gently brought my thumb to the back of his hand, tracing circles there like he had done to me earlier. There was only so much comfort I could give him while sitting across from one another at a restaurant.
"Told my mum about you, by the way." He suddenly piped up. My eyes widened as I paused the movement of my thumb for a moment, "Really?" I felt my face growing hot as I tried to hide the small smile on my lips. Harry saw though and snickered along, "Yeah. She always interrogates me and couldn't really hide it."
"What did she say?" I curiously asked.
"Well, she kind of already knew because Gemma had talked to her."
"Oh no." My face dropped, "No, no, no..."
"Oh yeah." Harry laughed, "But don't worry, I talked you up."
I palmed my face and groaned, "Fuck, I'm never going to live that horrible first impression down, am I? Your mum must think I'm such a floozy."
He laughed a little more and shook his head, "It's so cute when you're embarrassed. And no, honestly, don't worry about it. She, um – she wanted me to ask you if you wanted to come over for Christmas."
My head shot up as I stared at Harry, who for once had a rather nervous look on his face, "Wait, really?"
He scratched the back of his neck, "Yeah, I know it's like... a lot. I told her you probably have your own thing going on. It's also another month and a half so... I mean, it's fine if you don't want to or if you've got other plans. I don't know what you usually do for the holidays."
"Oh, um... usually we have a Christmas eve eve dinner at the house. And then I drive to Brighton the next day and spend Christmas eve and Christmas day there. I usually drive back down on second Christmas day after visiting mum and then we celebrate New Year's eve here." I explained, "How about you?"
"We celebrate Christmas eve more than Christmas day." Harry snickered, "So I hang around on Christmas day there but we don't really do much, it's not like a big celebration or anything. And then I drive back down on second Christmas day too." Harry spoke.
"With us it's the other way around. Christmas eve is like more cosy and relaxed and then Christmas day has all the festivities. But it's not like formal or anything, my dad and Nicole basically invite the whole street and it's real crowded and cosy." I smiled, "It's a lot of fun."
"So, um..." He cleared his throat, "Would you want to?"
"What?" I asked in confusion, unsure of what he was asking. Harry avoided my eyesight and shrugged, "Celebrate together?"
I leaned my chin on my hand as my elbow was on the table, my other hand in his. I smiled and nodded, "I'd like to. We could, um – have Christmas eve at yours and then Christmas day at mine?"
"Drive from Cheshire to Brighton on Christmas day?" Harry asked and I chuckled, "Okay, yeah, it'd be an early morning. That's like... a five hour drive."
"We can work out details later." Harry grinned, "But I'd like that."
"Okay." I beamed and Harry mirrored it, smiling to himself. I cleared my throat, "How about your dad?"
"Oh, yeah, my parents got divorced when I was quite young. Sometimes I celebrate Christmas eve eve at his house or I just stop by on Christmas day for like a drink and a chat. Quite low-key. How about you? You said you visit your mum?"
"Mhm," I nodded, "Maycroft Manor always organizes something on Christmas day and the day after. I don't know, it's quite chaotic. Only stayed for ten minutes last year because she had a bad day and freaked out when I tried to hug her. So I left." I shortly explained. Harry's eyes turned sympathetic as he softly squeezed my hand, "'M sorry."
"It's okay." I smiled, "You... could come visit her with me, if you want to."
"Do you think she'd like me?" Harry snickered and I laughed, "Not sure. She was quite set on Patrick. But hey, doesn't matter, she won't remember you an hour later." I cracked the horrible Alzheimer's-joke, but Harry seemed to understand that it was simply another way for me to cope with it. He chuckled, "That's true."
Butterflies violently swarmed around my stomach upon realization that Harry wanted me to celebrate the holidays with him. I wanted the same thing, but it felt official. I knew my dad or Nicole didn't make it a big deal. I could invite literally anyone and they'd never question it, because it was such an informal thing in our family. It wasn't just a holiday reserved for family and loved ones, they shared it with everyone.
Christmas was basically an open house in Brighton. My dad barbecued, there were little heaters around the garden and we all took long walks on the beach. Everyone was welcome basically.
Our food arrived a little while later and Harry chattered and ate, enjoying each other's company. I hadn't realized how much I craved a proper date with him until we did it. Seeing him in the company of our friends was definitely very different. I saw him so often, but it was this alone-time that I yearned for.
Harry insisted on buying desert, so we shared a piece of cheesecake that was to die for. I scolded him for grabbing the biggest piece that could fit in his mouth, so I stole the single cherry as revenge. It was all fun and smiles, and I enjoyed myself so much. Each time I looked at him, I fell in love a little more.
I was so weak for him.
"So, got any other plans?" I asked as I put my coat back on. I had insisted on splitting the check for us. I refused to let Harry pay for me, and he had agreed after quite an extensive argument. He put his arm around my shoulder as we walked back into the cold November air. It wasn't drizzling or raining for once, but the temperatures were inching closer and closer to the zero.
There was apparently a chance of snow from next week on and I had to admit I was not ready for the slippery roads and the traffic that snow brought with it. The view was amazing, but that was kind of it.
Harry's breath clouded in front of his face as we started walking again, "There's a few nice bars around, we could go for a drink? Haven't been to any of those in a while but I always liked it there."
"I could go for a drink." I smiled. Harry pulled me closer into his side as we walked the sidewalk, zigzagging through the large amounts of people, "That there was kind of my main bar. I used to hang out there a lot like you guys hang out at Steve's. Kiara and her friends went there a lot. I hope... I mean, I hope they aren't there right now. But what are the chances, it's a regular Thursday." He shrugged and I smiled, "You can choose."
"It's fine." He reassured me, "Let's go, it's a cool place."
He wasn't wrong. The atmosphere of the pub was overall just cosy. There was soft jazz music playing and it resembled Steve's a lot. It was just less dingy and old, and quite a bit larger. I could already tell there were hardly any tourists here and it was mainly locals of all age groups.
"This is cosy." I smiled as Harry pointed to two free barstools and guided me there with a hand on my lower back. He nodded and his eyes lit up a bit when he made eye-contact with the bartender, "Hank! No way, you still work here?"
Hank raised his hand and then shook Harry's hand, "Harry, mate, it's been ages!"
They shortly greeted one another and then Harry put a hand on my back, "Hank, this is Penelope. Pen, this is Hank. He's kind of the Steve from this place."
I smiled at Harry's explanation and nodded at the thirty-something man behind the bar who waved, "Hi, nice to meet you."
"What can I get you two?" Hank asked, resting his palms on the wooden bar top. Harry looked at me for a second, "Two beers?" And I nodded.
"Two beers coming up." Hank confirmed.
Harry scooted his barstool a little closer to me so our legs bumped together and he could rest his hand on my thigh. I smiled at him, and he seemed happy to be back in this neighbourhood.
"Do you miss it here?" I asked after Hank had handed us the two beers. Harry shrugged his shoulders, "I had fun times here. It's just good memories." He explained.
We talked for about an hour, slowly drinking and laughing together. I had been surprised when Harry had affectionately pressed a kiss to my cheek in a public place like this. This entire evening had been so good. No one we knew would ever come to Camden, so we could really just be ourselves without worrying about anyone spotting us.
The ringing of the front door-bell didn't alert us since people constantly seemed to be walking in and out, but Harry's face suddenly dropped as he looked at something behind me.
I frowned at the sudden change and looked over my shoulder to see three guys and a girl sitting down at a table on the completely other side of the bar.
"Shit." He muttered, hunching his back a little before he licked his lips and let out a breath.
"Is everything alright?" I carefully asked. Harry pinched the bridge of his nose as he let out another groan, "Fuck... I should've known..." He breathed out as he lifted his head again, briefly looking at the little group before looking at me, "You remember how I told you that I was really into Kiara's friend group, right? Well, that's them."
"Those are your old friends?" I asked in surprise, quickly flicking my eyes to them again. They lingered on the girl with the brown curls, "Is that her?"
Harry shook his head, "No, that's Adrienne, one of her friends. Kiara's not here."
It stumped me how Harry fully changed now that these people were in the same space as we were. He literally seemed to disappear a little and grew restless on his barstool as his eyes were constantly fixated on the people behind me.
I placed my hand gently on his knee to get his attention, "Do you want to leave?"
He seemed to hesitate for a second but shook his head, "No. I haven't seen them in months and they used to be my closest friends, it's just a bit weird."
"I can imagine." I softly smiled, trying to reassure him, "Do you want to go say hi?"
Hesitation again. I could tell in his eyes that he was nervous, almost insecure. He fiddled with his thumbs, "I don't know. It all ended so weirdly. They ghosted me, so to say."
I sympathized with him greatly and he forced a small smile, "But I should be the bigger person and say hello, right?"
I shrugged, "You don't have to if you don't want to."
"No, I think it'll be good. I'll be back in a minute." He spoke with a sigh and I nodded as he got up his feet and straightened out. With his beer in his hand, he walked away from me and approached the little group.
My eyes followed him, seeing how their faces all broke out into smiles when he walked up to their table. Everyone got up to hug him or pat his back and he leaned against the table a bit to have a chat. I felt my face grow hot when he suddenly turned around and pointed at me, and the four people all stared at me intently.
I shot them a small smile and then they got to talking again. Harry eventually fully turned around and motioned for me to come to them. I frowned a little and he made a sign as if saying to take my bag and go over there, so I hesitantly did.
With my coat over my arm and my bag in my hand, beer in the other, I walked the few steps to the other end of the bar until I was next to Harry. He licked his lips, "Is it okay with you if we sit with them for a bit?"
I raised my brows, "Oh, yeah, of course." I turned around to the group of four again, "Hi." I smiled.
"Penelope, this is Adrienne, Mike, Caleb and Justin." Harry pointed to each of the people who all shot me polite smiles, until they motioned for the two extra chairs for us to sit down. I scooted a little closer to Harry again like earlier, but he seemed to tense up at that. I decided to keep my distance, not sure what Harry had told them about me or how much he wanted them to know.
Most of the time after that was spent with Harry catching up with his old friends. I had a bit of a hard time giving them a fair chance after what he had told me, after the way they had dropped him just like that. Without hearing him out. Honestly, the whole thing seemed a little fake to me as they seemed crazily interested in his life and repeated constantly how much they missed him.
I smiled at the jokes and answered when they asked me questions, but I mostly let Harry have his moment with them. He lit up during the conversations, and they seemed to reminisce on old times.
Not too long after though, the front door of the pub opened again and another girl walked in. Nobody seemed to have noticed her until she stood right at the table, and then her eyes were directly on Harry before briefly flicking to me.
Both seemed to tense up at the eye contact and the tension in the room shifted immediately. I didn't even have to ask Harry to know, that this was Kiara. She was pretty. Quite a bit taller than me and leaner too. She had equally brown hair as mine but hers was in a shorter bob that gave her an edge. Her make-up was a little heavier and her outfit was cute and put together.
"W-What are you doing here?" She asked in pure shock of seeing him. Harry tensed next to me and I kept my eyes low as I was sat right in between the two of them and I felt like I was very much in the way.
Harry cleared his throat, "I was in the neighbourhood and came in for a drink, bumped into these guys and they asked me to join."
It was silent for a little bit before Harry spoke again, "It's good to see y-"
"Don't give me that." She interrupted him, still standing up. It was clear to me that there was no bad blood here from Harry's side. He had explained it to me, that Kiara had ended up hurt and broken hearted whereas that had never been his intention. There was simply no good way to tell someone you weren't in love anymore. Or never had been, in Harry's case. Kiara didn't take it well, trashed his apartment and turned everyone against him.
He had also expressed to me that he sometimes missed her as a friend. They got along well, there just wasn't love there from his side, no romantic feelings. It had to be hard to see her again and have her act so cold to him. It also had to be hard to be fully submerged in his old life again but he didn't belong anymore.
I briefly flicked my eyes up to Harry but he was staring at Kiara. She eventually let out a breath, "I would like you to leave."
Harry continued to look at her, disbelief in his eyes. My eyes were on his so-called friends though. None of them dared opening their mouths, dared defending him, dared being as nice to him like they had been before Kiara was here. It enraged me how fake they were. Harry was better off without these people, even though I knew nothing about that was going to comfort him now. He seemed pained, honestly, at the behaviour of these people.
Adrienne awkwardly took a sip of her drink while I looked at each and every one of their faces, waiting for them to speak up. But none of them did.
I eventually cleared my throat and looked back to Harry, "Should we go back to our own table?"
He finally looked at me, emitting a breath through his hurt face. The shortest nod came from him as he dropped his eyes and followed my lead, gathering our stuff and picking another small table at the front window of the bar.
I felt the five pairs of eyes following us, and as long as they were staring I didn't dare touching him. I wasn't sure what Harry was comfortable with right now, but he looked so defeated that I just wanted to wrap him up and hold him to me. Like he had done for me so many times. I fidgeted in my seat, feeling the urge to hold his hand or squeeze his leg while he had his eyes low still.
"Harry..." I urged him but he shook his head, "I don't want to talk about it."
I pressed my lips together and nodded, "Okay. Do you just want to go home?"
A short nod again.
"Alright," I breathed, "I'm quickly going to use the restroom and pay our tab and then we can go, yeah?"
He didn't fight me on the tab this time. It was like all the energy had been sucked from him and I felt incredibly sorry for him. I had never seen him look so small or crushed. It made me realize how truly painful it had been for him to get kicked out of this group of friends without a single chance to explain himself.
I got up again, walking through the full bar to find the toilets, which also included walking by their table. I felt too angry to give them even a look, strutting right past them and into the restrooms.
I quickly peed and refrained from rolling my eyes when I walked out of the stall to use my hands, and saw none other than Kiara there too.
How convenient.
I shot her a small, polite smile through the mirror as I pumped some soap in my hands.
"Penelope, right?" Her voice was gentler than before and I inhaled a breath as I slowly nodded, "Penny, yes."
Her fingers tucked a strand of short hair behind her ear, "Can I just... I don't know if I'm overstepping or not, but I feel like I need to warn you about Harry."
My head shot up to look at her through the reflection of the mirror while I couldn't help my jaw from clenching, "You're overstepping." I confirmed.
She pressed her lips together and slowly nodded, "I thought so. I felt like this about him too when other people warned me for him. But now, I wish they had, because I wasted a year of my life."
"Wasted?" I asked in disbelief, "Really?"
"Really." She sharply bit back. Her shoulders untensed as we were in silence, now standing face to face, "I just want to say that you shouldn't waste your time with him, not like I did. He just says what you want to hear, but believe me when I say that nobody's ever going to be enough for him."
I felt myself burning up with rage, feeling the need to punch her in the face like I had done with Patrick when he talked shit about Harry. I crossed my arms in front of my chest to keep myself in check, "If you gave him the chance to explain, he could tell you yourself that he never meant to hurt you. Feelings come and go, that doesn't make him a bad man." I spoke in defence of him.
Kiara chuckled and shook her head, "God, you sound just like me a year ago. I feel for you, Penny... He's going to drop you like he drops everyone. It's never good enough for him."
I pressed my lips together but couldn't retort anything. Part of me felt like this wasn't my fight to fight, I didn't want to speak in Harry's place. But on the other hand I didn't want to let her talk about him like this, "How you can believe anything that comes out of his mouth, baffles me." Kiara continued, "He's a pathological liar, Penny. He tells you he loves you, doesn't he? He doesn't even know what that is. He just tells you what you want to hear."
I let out a sharp breath, "It crushed him to lose your friendship and those others. You all dropped him like flies when he made a mistake. Nobody's perfect, but you never gave him the chance to apologize or tell his story. I'm thankful that he's got good people around him now, people who he can trust, who he can count on. And now, please, leave me alone. Like I said before, you are overstepping. I don't need your warnings. I know Harry and I know what he's worth and what he means to me, and what I mean to him."
With that, I brushed past her and out of the restrooms. My face felt hot just from that short confrontation. I was shaking on my legs in both anger and panic, because I hated conversations like that.
Harry was sitting on the edge of his seat when I walked back up to him, a frown on his forehead, "Did she follow you into the bathrooms?"
"Yes." I breathed as I snatched my coat from my chair, "Let's get out of here." I forced him a smile.
"What did she tell you?" Harry urged and I shook my head, "It doesn't matter."
"Penelope." He pushed sternly and I sighed, "Harry, just drop it. It doesn't matter, I don't believe a word she says. Let's just get home."