Vieira hears a knock at her dorm room door. She answers it, and sees Evelyn standing, tilting back and forth on her feet. She looks less like Evelyn than the girl Vieira she has come to know. Her eyes are lined with heavy black eyeliner, and she wears a red plaid dress and fishnets, a far cry from her previous adherence to all that is soft and warm.
In her shock, Vieira opens the door wide. Evelyn enters. She moves over and sits at the chair at Vieira's desk.
"I'm glad I caught you," Evelyn says. "I knocked yesterday but you weren't home."
Vieira doesn't particularly want to see Evelyn, but this looks like a twisted version of the girl that she has come to know. Vieira, leaving the door cracked ajar to prevent Evelyn from talking about Poppy, goes and sits on her beanbag chair.
Evelyn looks at Vieira, who is still silent. It's been too long since she and Vieira had a chat. Words have not united them but physicality has. "You alright?"
Vieira opens her mouth. She is not as quiet as before, but she lacks what to say. She doesn't want to know more about Evelyn, but she also does not want to reveal her own secrets. "Do you have a piece in the art gallery?"
"Yes," Evelyn says. It's her midterm grade, after a semester of hard work. "It uses exclusively tulle, which isn't common. I find the material ghostly. It's light, it flows, and it's mesh after all. Like a net."
Vieira understands nets. She feels trapped in one herself, "why have you come?"
"I wanted to check on you, I haven't seen you in a while," Evelyn says. "I know that girl's death has been hard on you."
That girl, Vieira thinks. She doesn't even get the dignity of a name any longer.
Another knock at the door, and Evelyn gets up to open it before Vieira can protest.
Tom stands on the opposite Evelyn.
"Maybe not..." Evelyn begins, but he ducks under her arm before she can finish, "now."
"Vieira," he tells her. He didn't think through what he would say. He hasn't been able to think. He only feels half himself, the other half is a character that he puts on for the others to see. Tom is an actor first and foremost, but not an improviser. He needs a script.
Maybe he should have asked Ez for more words.
"I..." Vieira really thought she had seen the last of Tom.
Evelyn grabs Tom by the shoulders and rushes with him into the hall. She shuts the door behind it. Vieira clicks it into a lock.
"What are you doing?" he asks, his eyes wide.
"She's going through something hard," Evelyn says. "Now is not the time-"
"It's never the perfect time!" Tom shouts.
Evelyn begins to walk away, hoping he will follow. Instead, he lingers around her door. There is no one in the hallway, although there are eyes everywhere.
"Come now, Tommy," Evelyn says. "She doesn't want to see you. Don't take it too personally. I don't think she wants to see me either."
Tom cannot sleep without her. He cannot think without her. The world is going dark. He is backstage searching for the light, only to stumble out in front of everyone from behind the curtain. He reveals a deep part of himself that he wants no one else to know.
"I need to see her now," he insists.
Evelyn frowns. She wraps a hand around him and pulls him in, "come to the fashion show tomorrow. She'll be there, am I sure she'll be happy you're supporting her."
Even though it's not what he wants, Tom resolves that it'll be okay.
~~~
Felix finds Kai on the track. Kai is doing interval training and suicide running drills all morning. He feels his muscles tearing, but he isn't giving them an opportunity to repair. There is a rugby game soon, there is always a rugby game. The season ends the day after the art show. He hopes someone will be in the stands to cheer him on. He certainly knows the ghost of Poppy will be haunting him.
"Hey," Felix says. Kai runs past him. He calls out, "care to take a break?"
Kai runs back past him, "one second."
It's more than a second. Two minutes pass as he finishes the suicides. Then, Kai takes his water bottle and dumps it over his sweaty body.
Felix rolls his eyes. He's gotten ill before from working out but never desired to do that. Especially not in the chilly November wind. New England is cold.
"How are you doing?" Kai asks. "What happened at the ball?"
"Medical fluke," Felix shrugs. He's not going to get into it with Kai. They may both be athletes, but Kai isn't the kind to understand what demon forces Felix to keep his stomach empty.
"What brings you here?" Kai asks.
Felix looks at him, blankly, "think I'm going to ask out Evelyn for drinks. That cool with you?"
"Why wouldn't it be?" Kai still does not want anyone to know the level to which he stooped to procure Evelyn's favour. "She's not my property."
"Does she know that?" Felix crosses his arms over his chest.
Kai furrows his brow, "what are you getting at?"
"You two were a little friendly at the masquerade," Felix says.
Kai laughs. He understands Felix though. He has every reason to be jealous of Kai. Being more athletic, and handsome, and generally likable can cause anyone to turn green with envy.
"What?" Felix practically spits.
Kai shrugs, "I'm just friendly with everyone."
"Yeah everyone, at the same time. You only danced with Evelyn."
Kai frowns, "are you accusing me of something?"
"What exactly would I be accusing you of, exactly?" Felix plants his feet further apart.
Kai shakes his head, "nothing."
Kai's breath is still thundering, so the only sound between them is the whistle of the wind and his breathing. The track is far enough away from students that their distant chatters cannot be heard. They wouldn't be having a conversation so brazenly otherwise.
"So it's cool if I ask her out?" Felix asks.
Kai actually feels a sense of relief, "course."
~~~
Jetta knocks on Roman's door and then hears scrambling.
The door opens slightly, with Roman on the other side, "can I help you?"
"Yeah," Jetta says. "You can let me in."
Roman blinks, "one second."
They close the door and begin to clean up their room. They were doing a deep cleaning, donating all the clothes that they don't love, organizing all of their drawers, throwing out pens that don't have sentimental value. It's a difficult task for Roman because so many things have memories attached to them. How can they just give something up so easily?
Jetta waits. Impatiently, but she waits. When the door opens, Jetta comes inside. Roman gestures for her to sit in the desk chair while Roman takes the bed.
"It's..." Jetta pauses. She's been in their room before, but it has never looked like this, "tidy."
"I've been doing cleaning," Roman answers. It's nearly impossible to organize with Kant haunting one's head, but their thoughts have been less sporadic lately. Everything is in a place, including the items in their room and their thoughts. Some more modern, some less intelligent, philosophy professors would be impressed. Others would know what's really going on.
Jetta wanted to check in on Roman, at the request of Ellie. The blonde forgot all about their conversation due to midterm stress and thought Jetta would be best to check Roman. Jetta doesn't know what to say.
"How can I help you?" Roman asks.
"I just was nearby and wanted to say hi," Jetta says.
Roman is used to searching for meaning. They doubt Jetta. Maybe Jetta wanted to come over, but with The Divide, ulterior motives are as plentiful as spies. "There must be something. You know, you can trust me, right? I consider us friends. Even considering everything else going on, I'm glad I found you. Regret isn't so bad, right? This, gentlemen, is the essence of all philosophy."
"I'm trans," Jetta blurts out, then covers her mouth.
Roman nods, "it takes a lot of bravery to come out."
"Do not tell anyone else," Jetta's heart is racing. She wanted to trust someone, wanted a reason to confide. Unfortunately, now she has put her life in peril.
Roman offers a soft smile with downturned eyes, "I promise. I'll take your secret to the grave."
~~~
Ez does not seek people out. They happen upon him. When he sees Briar sitting alone on a park bench, he sits down on the other end. He pulls out a book and stares at the pages. He's seen her. He knows that she knows he's seen her. Still, he waits for her to ask him what he's reading.
Campus is large and spread out, but the population is small. Briar wishes at this moment she had gone somewhere larger. She cannot escape eyes on her everywhere. She remembers the last time she directly spoke to Ez. It was at the first party, all those nights ago.
"How can you even concentrate on a book?" she asks.
Ez looks up at her. His curl hair falls in his eyes, and he blows it away with his lips, "it's easier to exist in fantasy than reality."
"Where the good guy always wins," Briar agrees.
Ez finds those endings a bit cliché. He tries not to look down on literature, but occasionally he has to gatekeep. "If you wanted the good guys to win, you should have gone to the police. Not campus, but real police."
Briar frowns. She slides across the bench so their shoulders are pressed together, "are you saying that this is my fault?"
"Not exclusively," he points out. "Have we ever really been able to tie Poppy to your incident besides the other drugs she had?"
Briar looks around. No one is nearby, but they could be. People are getting less hesitant to speak in public about their crime. She's going to talk to her friends and see if anyone knows a cottage nearby that they can rent. Everyone just needs to relax.
"Don't worry," Ez says. "People may pay attention to you, but never to me."
Briar's heart, though made of stone, sinks deeper into her chest. He says it as if it does not matter that he is a wallflower. He ought not to be. "Anyway, it's not my fault. Just because we haven't tied it to her yet, doesn't mean we won't."
She gets up as she sees Artemis approaching, with the smallest of waves, she says goodbye to Ez.
Ez watches her, pretending to be reading.
"Who's that?" Artemis asks, a smile on his face. "I haven't met him before."
"Ezekiel Zagury," she answers. "He's friends of friends. Really not worth anyone's time."
~~~
Luis has dragged Ellie off-campus. She was hesitant, but now that midterms are over, she feels better about escaping. They make it to the bus station, and take a bus to another city. Ellie brings homework for the journey, and Luis brings his sketchbook. Ellie listens to music on the way there, trying to blur out everything else.
When they finally arrive in the next biggest town, they make their way to the attraction Luis is excited to see. They arrive at the building, and, after they both pay, they are led to their lane.
No one else is around, so they drop their bags and place them near the back wall, and head up.
"You think you can throw an axe?" Luis asks, brandishing one in his hands.
Ellie frowns, "probably."
She's worried that she won't hit the target perfectly. She's worried she will be bad at it. Her midterms are just behind her and she is petrified that things are not going according to plan at all.
Luis throws the first axe. He manages to hit the target, though on the edge.
He pumps a fist, "your turn."
It's not as big of a rush a violently throwing art supplies, but it works. He can feel his heart pumping.
Ellie is still nervous. They are missing classes for this. Luis doesn't seem like the type to care, but she is. He said it would cure her of all her worries. She doubted him but also wanted to give him a chance. She was wrong.
She throws another axe, and it hits his axe, bouncing to the ground. Once it is safe, they collect their axes and start again.
"Vieira isn't doing well," he points out.
"Roman isn't doing well," Ellie agrees. "We all aren't doing well."
"I'm great!" Luis rolls his eyes. He throws the axe at the target, and it hits. "See, nothing's wrong."
Ellie doesn't challenge him. She doesn't think Luis is in the mood for an armchair diagnosis. Rather, she throws her axe, and it bounces off his once more. The two of them are walking in the same circle, only to collide violently. They are such separate people, and yet they've ended up in the same miserable spot.
"I've seen Briar around campus with some guy," Luis says. "I'm glad she can act normal."
Luis goes and grabs the axes and gets ready to throw. His arms are aching already, after only two throws. He hasn't been fit lately. He hasn't done much of anything at all.
He hits the target, and it's Ellie's turn.
"It'll be fine," he tells her.
She hits the target, narrowly missing Luis's axe. She continues to doubt him nonetheless.
~~~~~
I'm back(ish). I finally figured out what to write, just figuring out the climax now. I have the ending and stuff, just figuring out how to get there feels impossible. Since I'm a little rusty, let me know what you think of this! I'm quite excited!