Throughout the duration of the storm things were off between Lottie and me and so they should be. I mean I accused her of cheating or implied it at least. She's been trying but she's had a lot of alone time too. In the office doing work. And when the wifi went down she started to read. I've never seen her read a book since I've met her. She reads her scripts five minutes before she's on set because she doesn't sit still for long enough.
Now we're back at work and it's easier to avoid each other than ever. I work in the day she's on night shoots, I'm off on the weekend I go to London to see Rose she comes with me but stays at the farm or is at the west end helping out, teaching or even performing one-off shows.
Tonight was one of the rare nights where we're both home and rested. We've had two days at home so we've both had time to relax and rest. Lottie was in the kitchen baking a pie for Roberts dinner party tomorrow night. I wrap my arms around her waist and press my face into her back. She held onto my hand for a few seconds acknowledging me before going back to sorting out the pie crust. "You okay?" She asked in her soft voice. "Yeah, just wanted a cuddle." She moved from my touch and went to her sink to wash her hands. I pouted but tried to hide it. My girlfriend just rejected me. I went to talk away but felt her arms around me. "Didn't want to get flour all over you." She mumbled. "You sure you're okay?" She asked, I nodded into the crook of her neck. I felt her lips softly peck my head. Things almost felt normal again like I didn't ruin them. She started to brush through my hair with one of her hands. I gripped her tighter. "It's okay, baby." She told me, adjusting her hold on me. "Please don't leave." "I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here." "You're not. You don't want to be here." "If I didn't want to be here, I wouldn't be here." "You're here because you feel like you have to be." I pulled away from her completely. "Why do I have to be here? I'm here because I want to be with you. Because we're in a relationship." "Just leave." "No." She turned back to her pie. "Leave." "No." "GET OUT!" I shouted at her.
"Scarlett... Take a minute." "I hate you." I spit at her.
CHARLOTTE'S POV
"I hate you." I knew she didn't mean it. I knew she was hurting or scared and I haven't been the most attentive girlfriend since our date night. I knew something was wrong the minute she came into the kitchen. I could sense it. "You don't hate me," I tell her softly. It hurt me to hear her say that to me. "I do." "You're scared... I know you. You're trying to push me away so you're in control of it if I leave. But I've told you before, I'm not leaving you. We're working through this. We'll get through it." "We've not even spoken in days! We've-"I need you to just take a minute." She would keep spiralling and I don't want to argue with her, nor do I want to sit back and take it and get hurt myself.
I slowly take a few steps towards her, her breaths were increasing. "It's okay. We're going to be okay." I tell her touching her arm. "I'm not leaving you. I promise." I knew she had insecurities, I knew this wouldn't be smooth sailing, I knew we'd face challenges I just thought that by now she would trust me. I cupped her face making her look at me. "It's okay," I tell her meaning it. "Just take a few breaths." I lead her to the stool's around the Island and sat her down. "Don't go." "I'm not," I assured her holding onto her hand as I reach for my glass of water that was nearby. I hand it to her. "Have a sip." I encouraged. "Scarlett." She nodded. "We can talk when you've had some rest okay." She noded. "I'll be up in a second, I'll just clean this up." She nodded again. I pecked her cheek.
I cleaned up and went upstairs to our bedroom. She was changing out of her jeans into sweats. I kicked off my jeans and picked up the sweats Scar brought in for me. "I don't hate you." She says looking at me. "I know. You don't have to push me away." I tell her, climbing into bed, I held the covers up so she can slip in next to me. "I know we've been in this odd place. But it doesn't mean we're over." "No one has ever stuck around through all this. Colin-"I'm not Colin. I'm not anyone else you've dated. I'm Lottie. And I'm not going to scream or fight you or hurt you because you're scared. This is real for me. I don't want to start again with anyone else. I don't want anyone but you. You're my Scar, You're my everything and that's not going to change." I squeezed her hand three times. "Why do you care so much?" "Because I do. Because I love you." "I'm a mess." "No, you're not. You're amazing. The best mum, you're strong, independent, attentive, loving, caring, protective. You're not a mess Scarlett." "I keep messing things up." "I mess things up too." "You fix things. I mess them up." "Baby...We're human, we make mistakes. But we need to fix them, and work through this." I look at her, she had been crying, I wiped them away letting go of her hand to do so before holding it again. "Just a bump in the road baby." She nodded, I lent to kiss her lips softly.
"I have work in the morning. But how about a date in the afternoon, could meet me at work and we can go somewhere." "What was the date night for? The one in the storm... Chris said you were going to do something but then you dropped the candle and I hung up on him and he's not mentioned it since." Shit. I'm going to kill him, was he really going to ruin the surprise. "Don't worry about it." I can't tell her what I was going to do. She'd feel worse than she does. She'd blame herself and I didn't want that. I wanted things to go back to the way they were between the two of us. "Lottie." I kissed her softly.
"Do you want to watch a film? I can get the laptop from downstairs." We made a point not to have TV's upstairs so we use the laptop when we're being lazy and don't want to leave our room. "Can we just talk and cuddle?" "Yeah. Of course." We both laid down and she laid her head on my chest, I run my fingers up and down her arms tracing different patterns. I'd kiss the top of her head occasionally as we spoke. "Tom ran around screaming at the top of his voice and Evans jumped out of his chair half asleep and just dropped to the floor," I explained. Scarlett chuckled at my story. "Not as bad as Hemsworth nearly knocking out Tom with his plastic hammer. He threw it on set and it hit him straight in the head." She told me. "Why can I picture Hemsworth just not even carrying." "He didn't. He just shouted at Tom for being in the way of his hammer." "Oh gosh." I was laughing imagining this happening, Tom in Loki's costume and Hemsworth just being Hemsworth.
"I miss working with you." "Not my fault you picked the losing team." I teased. The marvel cast has been split into two. "A few more weeks and we'll be back to annoying everyone on set with how in love we are." She laced our fingers together. "I love you." She told me, I knew she meant it, she has every time she said it. "I love you. Unconditionally." She looked up at me with a smile. "The beauty of that is, it never stops." She pouted her lips so I kissed them and helped her move up so we could deepen the kiss. My hands ran down the sides of her body, oh how I've missed this. Not the kissing just the intimacy with her. Laying here talking about our weeks, laughing, being close. Just having her back.
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SCARLETT'S POV
Things started to get better. We went to Roberts dinner party and it was as if we had never been in a bad place. We were laughing at inside jokes, whispering to each other in our own little world. We definitely weren't avoiding each other. It was nice to have her back by my side. I looked to my left and she was there the whole night.
I rested my hand on her thigh under the table she didn't react to it so I moved it higher, I noticed her sit up straighter as she spoke to Florence. They were somewhat back to normal. Not as close as they once were but they were friends again. I was glad, Florence meant a lot to Lottie and I didn't want her to lose anyone else. Plus Tom was really stressed because he was caught up in the middle of it being really good friends with both of them. I continued to talk to Chris acting normal as I slid my hand towards her inner thigh, I felt her tense up just for a brief second. Drawing patterns on her inner thigh acting innocent as I did, she shifted in her seat still talking like nothing was happening. I mean nothing was happening.
"We need to plan something like a cast again," Chris says. "We're all here right now." "Something fun." "Sorry, my dinner party isn't up to your reckless standards." Robert joked with him. I moved my hand under her dress, it had risen a little from where she had been sat down so it was rather high now, but it covered what it needed to. I hear her breath hitch slightly, I only noticed because I was listening for her reactions. "We could go to that golf place," Hemsworth suggested. "No, Lizzie and Lottie went on dates there." I point out. Evan's laughed. "Lottie wanted to do an escape room," I suggested. "Didn't you baby?" I asked her getting her attention. I made eye contact with her stretching my finger out and swiping it along her underwear. She pushed her lips together. "Huh?" She asked distracted, I rested my hand back flat. "The Escape room. You wanted to go to one." She nodded. I smirked and then looked away.
She reached forward for her wine and it was her fault that she moved closer to my hand causing friction all on her own. She tensed for a second composing herself and tucking herself under the table fully before leaning back and continuing her conversation. "We could go. There are so many cool ones." "We went to the hotel one... With Will Smith." Tom said getting involved. "That was good." He encouraged. I moved my hand again her breath hitching again, I bite my lip to conceal my smirk and continued to help plan this trip with the cast. Lottie rested her hand on mine, I looked over at her innocently.
"What's up?" "Nothing." She smiled and moved my hand away from her core adjusting her dress a little. I leant into her ear to whisper to her. "Take me home." She said before I could say anything to tease her further. I smirked. "I'm talking." I teased. She rolled her eyes. "Don't be a brat," I tell her pulling away.
I looked back at Chris he had a dumb smile on his face. "What?" I asked him. "You two are gross." "What did we do?" "Just so in love. Whispering to each other. And talking with your eyes. It's disgusting." "We can't all be lonely and miserable Chris-" I stop talking just about finishing my sentence when I felt Lottie's hand dangerously high under my dress. She wasn't even looking at me. Well, I did start this.
She rubbed me through my underwear for just a few seconds, I tried my best to show no reaction but I was dying internally screaming for her to give me more. Then it stopped. "I'll help you, Susan." Lottie said standing up and taking the dishes Susan was carrying. "Yeah me too," I say collecting a few and following Lottie to the kitchen.
"You can't do that," I tell her when we were alone. "I didn't do anything." She said innocently as she washed the dishes. I kissed up her neck until she turned in my arms and kissed my lips. My hands roamed her body. Fuck I missed this. "Love you," I mumbled against her lips. "Love you." She said back pecking me one more time before pulling away.
We went back in after cleaning the dishes. "Lottie, come get in this photo," Lizzie called her over. She looked at me almost asking for permission. I didn't want to have a relationship like this. "Go ahead," I tell her pushing her in the direction. Lizzie pulled her on her lap wrapping her arms around her tiny waist pulling her closer. "You're raging and it's showing." Chris informed me "I'm trying." I say relaxing. "You're the Jealous type." She says with a shrug. "And that trait is going to be the reason why I lose her," I say looking away from her laughing with her friends. Our friends.
"She won't leave you." I raised an eyebrow. "She said that?" He asked concerned suddenly no longer joking around. "Not exactly, but she said she can't keep doing this if I don't trust her." "She shouldn't have to... You should trust her." "Trust got me beaten and left alone." "Lottie isn't a dick like the guys you've dated. She's... Amazing." He says admiring her. She was laughing still on Lizzie's lap throwing her head back. "She is... Exactly why I don't want to lose her." "You won't." "I don't deserve her and when she realises that she'll leave." I wrap my arms around myself.
"Baby?" Lottie says in my ear, where did she come from, her arms snaked around my waist pulling me into her front. "Yes?" I asked. "I really want to go home now." She whispered to me. "I want to... You know." She says pulling away swaying with me to the music Robert and Susan had playing for background noise. She pecked my cheek before letting me go. She went over to Hemsworth and Tom Hiddleson. "What did she say?" "Nothing." I smiled at him. "You'll be leaving in 5 then." "Yeah." He chuckled. "You're made for each other Scar... Start believing in your own worth. The rest of the world does." He patted my shoulder before walking away to go take photos with the others.
If I don't accept that Lottie loves me and won't leave, I'll end up ruining this for myself. And I don't think I can afford to ruin this... To lose her. To never have her in my life this way. I can't afford to do that. She's my everything. My soulmate, my best friend, my future. She's my Lottie. And I need to trust her when she tells me I'm hers too.