I wanna be a cowboy baby
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I snapped, for Thanos to die and for everyone that came with him dust away. But somehow, I am back in the world, where I am the actress, with Peter...
"Can you still shoot your webs?" I ask.
"Ugh, yeah." Peter nods, "I can climb walls too."
"Then our super abilities stay, ugh... shit. What do I do, what do I do?" I mutter, walking around.
"Why did the snap sent us here? I don't get it." Peter says.
"Neither do I, ugh... let's change our clothes first. If anything we don't want to mess with the timeline... more than we already did. At least we have to pretend that I am (Y/n) the actress, and you're Tom."
"Is he from Holland?" Peter asks.
"Oh, bruh. He's British. He drinks tea darling."
"Do I have to speak in a British accent, if I'm pretending to be him?" He asks, as we're talking off our suits quickly.
"Ugh... yeah?"
"I'm horrible though."
"You can speak Spanish but you can't do a British accent? Come on, try to say something."
Peter sighs and takes a long time before saying.
"Oi."
"..." I look at him,
"Oi, innit?" He tries harder.
"Wha—?"
"I don't know! I'm freaking out! I never doubted you coming from the wrong world, but I didn't think I'm gonna be here! Now, what am I going to do? Tom Tea drinker Holland is unconscious right there and we don't even know when and where are we!"
We hear knocking.
"Shit," I whisper, quickly puts on whatever we can find in Tom's closet... mostly Gucci, rich boi.
"What do we do with my look alike? He really does look like me!" Peter says.
"Of course because he plays you in the movie you guys are like literally the same.... I... I don't know. Put him in the closet for now."
"But I feel bad for this version of me!"
"Me too! We can't risk anyone seeing two Peters or two Toms." I push Tom into the closet and taps his head. "His nose is broken like how I broke all the fourth walls..."
We stand up and quickly put our suits into the big bag. Then we look at the floor, the infinity stones.
"If we touch that, we're dead, right?" He asks.
"Then we don't touch it." I use Tom's toothbrush to gather up the stones into Tom's small spider-man bag and put it in the bigger bag.
"That worked?" Peter shrugged.
"I have no clue about anything anymore." I sigh, we eventually open the door up, to see... Jacob. He's wearing a face mask.
"Ned?" Peter asks.
"Jacob!!" I yell into Peter's face and hug Jacob, "Jacob, the best buddy who plays Ned, Peter Parker's best friend. He's the best!" I try giving Peter the signal.
"Oh. Right. Ugh, good morning Mr. Jacob." Peter smiles cutely.
I slap my head. Oh god. This kid. So cute I can't even throw arms when he's dumb.
"He alright?" Neddie— I mean Jacob asks me. I am dumb too.
I nod repeatedly. "Ugh, yes. We're kinda lost, what's going on?"
"What do you mean?" He asks, pushing the elevator buttons.
"Where are we going again?" I smile dryly.
"Are you doing that bit again?" He laughs.
"What bit?"
"One where you pretend you wake up from marvel cinematic universe and don't have a clue what's going on."
My smile is stressing.
"I... might be?" I drop my smile. "Seriously what year is this, what happened and where are we going?"
Jacob laughs out loud. "Tom mentioned you did this to him once, right mate?" He taps Peter's shoulder who is clueless and scared. "Fine, Spidey girl from another universe, I'll summarize for you."
"You're the best." I smile.
"It's 2021."
"What."
"Loki series is out on Disney Plus today, RDJ booked a theater for all of us to go hang out and watch it all together, for the first time! Yesterday you both were drunk and now you're all over the internet."
...
What's a Disney plus?
"Disney... plus? Is that like a streaming site...?" I ask nervously.
"You're totally killing the bit today. I heard the Russos brother wants to extend your contract, but they're rumors." Jacob says. Then turn around. "And wear masks, please!"
"Why...?" Peter asks, then forget he has to sound British, "Woh for mate?"
Jacob looks a little confused by the way Peter speaks, but he shakes it off. "Are you guys doing the bit together today? Because damn! Um, the Covid-19 pandemic, you know the deadly virus going around?"
"Who would've thought things like this will exists in the real world too, haha." I laugh awkwardly. What the fuck, there's a pandemic?
"Two nearly three years of miserable quarantine and no parties... Tom, why are you so quiet today?" Jacob asks as we get off the elevator, we take masks from Jacob and put them on, it's not much trouble since we always wear masks anyway.
Peter panics. "I'm just a li ell dizzay."
If Tom hears that accent he would cry.
"Is he really okay?" Jacob asks me worriedly, I blink repeatedly back, head blank and brain cells gone.
"He accidentally ate my weed cookies."
Jacob looks at me for a moment,
Then asks, "You still have some left for me?"
What's going on in the real world!?
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"Baby, I'm scared." Peter tells me, we're both about to cry. Sitting on the parking lot, buying time before we actually going in to the preserved theater.
"Me too... If I don't count the time I lose you, then I was in 2018, so I lost 3 years in my world, and lived 5 years in your world." I rub my head.
"We have to do something, there must be a way out right?"
"We could try snapping the stones again? Asking to go back to your world." I say, "But then again last time I snapped it didn't give me what I wanted, it sent us here."
"Maybe this time I'll do the snap."
"Hell no. I survived the first one, I ain't letting you take any risks."
"But—"
"No, but, Pete. First of all, we need to get through tonight, then plan the snap tomorrow. Now Peter, remember in this world you are impersonating Tom Holland, he's 25, can drive a car, rich, a Hollywood star."
"And British." He nods. "I'm kinda jealous, he's rich..."
"Come to think of it just drops the accent. If anyone asks just say you're in the mood for an American accent today. And... Peter you're going to meet a lot of people you know, but they are not themselves. And you can't freak out."
"Uh-ha." He tries so hard to catch up but he's struggling.
"These people are your fellow actors and actresses, I'll say their names when you meet them. But they are not... supers, no one on this earth has superpowers, okay?"
"Not at all?"
"I wish. So don't shoot webs in there."
Peter Panic Parker looks like he wants to not feel so good.
"You got this, okay? We got this."
Peter whines, "I just wanna go back there and get married to you..."
Aw.
Lawd.
I pull him into a hug, "We'll find our way back to our world."
We get up dazedly and head to the door, the security guards check our temperatures (seriously viruses like this happens outside movies too?) and we get inside.
Oh my Loki.
Tom Hiddleston is right over there with Chris Hemsworth.
"Is that Loki?" Peter asks me, "Isn't his hair longer?"
"That's Tom, as Loki, his hair isn't actually long. And that's Chris." I whisper as they start to notice us.
"There are two Toms?"
"And three Chrises."
"Your world is blowing my mind."
"Heyyy, my favorite weirdo." Chris Hemsworth hugs and lifts me up then spins me around happily.
"Ahhhh..." I laugh nervously as he eventually puts me down. Peter looks at us bitterly.
Tom H pulls Tom H... as in Loki pulls Peter for a hug, I am losing track with all these characters, somebody help.
"Did you like the tea mugs I sent to you for your birthday?" He asks Peter, Peter looks at me. I nod repeatedly. Of course Tom'd like that, they're British brosz
"Yeah, yeah, yeah! Tom! I'm Tom and Tom, I love the mugs..." Peter says.
All of us get second-hand embarrassment, I'm getting deja vu, like the first time I entered their world, it was tough not to be cringe.
"Anyway, what do you want, sex on the beach?" Chris asks Peter, looking at the cocktails menu.
"What?" Peter shooketh.
"The drink, sex on the beach, the cocktail, Tom." I pat Peter's back, he then lets out an oh.
"I don't drink... I mean, today I'll just have coke." Peter says worriedly. Chris shrugs.
"Coke for Spidey!" He shouts.
Then, we hear the room open up. And it is like a goddess aura spreading everywhere. Zendaya walks in.
"Oh my goodness." I say.
"That's MJ?" Peter asks, "That's really MJ?"
She looks at me with a big smile and walks to us, "(Y/n), sorry I couldn't stay at the party last night babe, how was it?"
Babe?
"It was fun, it was great, awesome." I say nervously. She's so tall and pretty as hell. She's a baddie but she does it so well...
"Hey, Tom." She barely looks at him, then she hugs the others. Wait, last time I was here they were together, no? What's happening?
"You look different today, what's with the big bag?" She asks me. Um, it carries all the infinity stones and two Iron spidey suits, gorgeous.
"A... present."
"For who?"
"It's gonna be a surprise haha." I say nervously.
"Is it for me?" She teases and pulls me by my waist, I panic as she hey little mama whispers in my ears, "You've got me a surprise girlfriend?"
What.
Wait what.
"Huh? Maybe?" I smile dryly back at her.
"You're the cutest."
Zen mother fucking daya then proceeds to— kiss me.
"Aye, you two, get a room." Chris laughs.
"New couples, can't blame them." Tom Hiddleston says.
I am beyond confused and that includes sexually confused... but all that I know is.
Zendaya is my girlfriend in the wrong world... and Peter is losing his mind.
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