ANAISHA'S POV :
Seated on a weathered bench in the park, I inhale deeply, attempting to quell the erratic rhythm of my heart. Wiping off the beads of sweat that have formed on my forehead, I carefully remove my earphones, tucking them into the pocket of my worn-out jacket. Despite the chilly embrace of the Sunday morning, the kind that makes you yearn for the warmth of your blanket and the solace of endless sleep, such luxuries evade me on this particular day. My mind, already deprived of rest, has been caught in a ceaseless run ever since the realization dawned upon me—I am on the precipice of a heartbreak.
As I sit there, contemplating the path ahead, the gravity of the situation sinks in. I grapple with the conflicting emotions within, torn between the desire to cling onto Samaksh, a man who could be 'the one' for me, and the harsh reality that I may have to let go. The final verdict lies in his hands, and regardless of the outcome, I must find the strength to accept it and forge ahead.
Samaksh, in my life, was like a fleeting ray of sunlight that managed to pierce through the dense clouds of darkness, sparking dreams of a shared future. Yet, the winds of change blew, and the ephemeral sunlight vanished, leaving behind a shadow of uncertainty.
Upon returning home, the atmosphere within the house buzzed with a newfound energy. Following the decision made by our mothers, preparations were underway for Samaksh and his family, who were to join us for dinner that evening. The prospect of this gathering infused the household with an air of anticipation.
To oversee the preparations and rituals, my maternal grandparents had come over, adding to the lively atmosphere. I had insisted on their presence, not just for the customary roles but because of the close bond I shared with them. During my childhood, I had spent most weekends at their house, given that they lived in the same city. The anticipation heightened as we learned that Samaksh's grandparents would also be in attendance, ensuring companionship for everyone.
Despite the preparations, I couldn't shake off the nervousness that gripped me about the upcoming evening. While Samaksh and I had exchanged texts over the past two days, our conversations had remained quite generic. Admittedly, I had only responded to his messages and hadn't made any efforts to sustain a conversation.
The day had swiftly passed, and the anticipated moment of their arrival was drawing near. I chosen a white floral kurti paired with jeans for the occasion.
As the doorbell resonated through the house, signaling their arrival, I hurriedly placed the last piece of cutlery on the table. The entire household gathered in the living room, and there I stood, momentarily rooted in place. Samaksh and his family had graciously entered, finding their places in the living room. Summoning my courage, I stepped into the room, only to find all eyes on me. Samaksh, with the same warm smile from our initial meeting, caught my gaze. Determining to stay composed, I greeted everyone with the widest smile I could conjure amid my nervousness, offering a namaste.
Seema aunty, Samaksh's mom, gestured for me to sit beside her. Engaging in light conversation on general topics, I felt the knots of nervousness gradually unravel. Meanwhile, Samaksh conversed with my family. When my mother stood to fetch snacks and beverages, Samaksh, demonstrating thoughtfulness, insisted on sharing a cup of hot chocolate with me, despite his apparent preference for coffee or tea—what he referred to as 'his life.' I smiled at his considerate gesture, although my heart sank just a little.
As everyone settled, the elders insisted that Samaksh and I retreat for some private time while they delved into their "elderly talks." It was then that Samaksh informed my parents about his elder brother and sister-in-law being unable to make it due to his sister-in-law feeling uneasy in her pregnancy. However, she was eager to meet me, so Samaksh proposed introducing us through a video call if I had no objections. He glanced at me, and I shook my head, indicating my agreement. In that moment, I realized it was the opportune time to address all the topics I hadn't broached during our initial meeting.
As we ascended the stairs to the terrace, Samaksh animatedly recounted how his sister-in-law had playfully threatened him into arranging a video call to introduce us. While he spoke about the nursery they were setting up for the baby with a themed decor, my mind grappled with how to initiate "the" conversation with him. Amidst his chatter, there was a sudden jolt to my heart when he turned and exclaimed, "I can't wait to see the baby; I just love kids." I'm certain my expression betrayed my emotional state, as he gazed at me for a few moments before heading to the terrace.
Leaning against the parapet wall on the terrace, Samaksh gazed at me, as though awaiting a revelation. "Anaisha, you know you can tell me anything, right?" he said. I nodded in response, but tears had already welled up in my eyes. I knew it was time to disclose, and so I did.
"Samaksh, I don't know how you're going to take this, but before anything, I want you to know that nothing I did was intentional. But I don't think we should take things forward."
"What? It's not something you can decide on your own, Anaisha. Is something troubling you? We'll figure it out. You just have to tell me what it is," he stepped closer, his voice softening, and he looked straight into my eyes.
Taking a deep breath, I continued, "A few years ago, I had drastically gained weight and had severe health issues. On consulting a doctor, I was diagnosed with PCOS... it's basically a hormonal imbalance that causes a lot of other issues as well. One of them being that I have fewer chances of conceiving a child."
"And you thought that was reason enough for us not to think of a future together?"
"You did say that you liked children."
"What kind of a man do you take me for, Anaisha? You think I want to marry you only because I am some crazy human whose only aim in life is to have children?"
"Samaksh, today you might feel like it isn't something to be worried about , but in the future it may drive a wedge between us and at that stage I don't know if I can handle any sort of separation or heartbreak." I sniffed trying to keep my emotions at bay.
"So you're trying to say that you can handle one now. " he asked .
I shook my head sideways knowing no words would come out of my mouth. This wasn't how things were supposed to go.
Placing a gentle finger under my chin, he lifted it to meet his gaze. "Listen to me, and remember this, Anaisha, I'm never going to say this again in our lives. I am not marrying you because of any ulterior motive or societal pressure, okay?" I simply nodded.
"I cannot simply dissolve the feelings I have for you and leave because you decided something that should have been a mutual decision. I'm not trying to trivialize your emotions; I understand where all this is stemmed from and why you said what you said right now. But what I also know is that we both want to spend our lives with each other, and we may not have to call it love at the moment, but there are feelings involved from both sides. I will never want to give up on you, Anaisha. Children or no children, I want to build a future with you. Even though we've met only once, I've never felt like this with anyone else. I'm sure you feel the same as well. Then why let go of something as precious as this when there is a solution for everything."
By now, my tears were falling freely, and I had no idea what I was going to say or do. He put forth valid arguments, leaving me feeling helpless in the face of his unwavering determination.
"Now, will you stop cooking up silly things in that pretty little brain of yours, or do I need to prepare myself for another one of these?" he chuckles.
I wipe my tears and turn to my last resort. "What about your family? Wouldn't they have a problem with-"
"They wouldn't, Anaisha, and even if they do, they'll eventually come around. It's our life, and we should get to decide how we live it, right?"
"But I want you to talk to them about your... our decision. I don't want them to be kept in the dark about anything, at least your parents in this case."
"Fine, now that I have debunked all of your misconceptions, please give me a smile that would show all your teeth to me," he chuckles.
I manage to smile at him, tears still streaming down my face.
"C'mere" he stretches his hand out for me to take . Once I'm in front of him, he slowly puts one of his arms around my shoulders, drawing me into a side hug. I stand still for a moment, and sensing my initial hesitation, he begins to back out. However, I circle my arms around his waist, taking another moment to process what was happening. He was still here. He had chosen me. He had looked beyond my imperfections. Was I dreaming? His voice brought me out of my reverie. "You okay?"
It was then that I realized we were still in the hug, and my tears had created an ugly patch on his navy blue t-shirt. I instantly untangle my arms and step back. "Why are you still crying?" he asks. I shake my head, smiling. "It's nothing." He raises one of his eyebrows at me but nevertheless lets it go. Wordlessly, I hand him a tissue and point at the patch on his shirt, and he dries it off.
Stepping closer, he gently takes my hands in his and reassures, "Anaisha, everything that's meant to happen in our lives will unfold at the right time. Our task is to hold onto hope, no matter what." I nod in acknowledgment.
After a brief moment, we decide to head downstairs. Wanting to present myself without any tears, I touch up my appearance. Samaksh attempts to lighten the mood with a few jokes, although my smile is more a result of the warmth he brings than the humor. As we descend the stairs, I turn to face him.
"Thank you for understanding, for not giving up, and for instilling so much hope in me. I genuinely feel much better after our conversation."
"Don't thank me, Anaisha. Those concerns were mere creations of your imagination. Consider this a lesson that, before making assumptions, you can always come and talk to me about anything. Moving forward, I envision us as a team, facing every challenge together. Not just a couple sharing the same space. When we discussed the kind of life partners we wanted, you emphasized the importance of the relationship itself, wanting to be best friends, sharing everything. I remember that conversation."
"You do?"
"Absolutely, and I'm committed to living up to those ideals. However, when we label it a relationship, it applies to both of us."
"I know, and I promise we'll be a team starting from now," I assure him.
"Good," he raises his hand, and we high-five each other, sharing a laugh.
"Uh, Anaisha, can we go inside now? The aroma of the paneer curry is too tempting, and I can literally feel my stomach growling," he says, rubbing the back of his neck. Adorably cute.
"Yeah, why didn't you tell me earlier that you were hungry?" I chuckle as we head into the living room.
"I wasn't; it's just the magic of good food," he shrugs.
The rest of the evening unfolds with the delightful scent of delicious food, the harmonious sound of laughter, and engaging conversations. It is then decided that we'll reconvene the next weekend at Samaksh's house to discuss the wedding dates and other related matters.
As the time comes for them to leave, I watch Samaksh effortlessly mount a gorgeous cruiser bike, capturing my attention. When my gaze returns, he meets my eyes with a proud smirk. Rolling my eyes at his playful expression, I turn to his family, already settled in the car, and bid my goodbyes. After my parents retreat into the house, leaving just the two of us.
"So do I take it that my bike is approved as well?" He arches his eyebrows, the smirk still playing on his lips.
"Even I take it that my car is approved," I say, trying to conceal my smile.
"Of course," we share a laugh.
"I'm surprised you bought your car the first time we met; the bike would have definitely impressed me without you having to say anything," I playfully remark.
"Uh... Anaisha, the car isn't actually mine. I borrowed it from Dad for a few days so that I could get my bike serviced. I couldn't afford a car at that stage of my career and didn't feel the need for it until now..."
"You don't have to worry about it now. My car is enough for both of us. I can certainly allow my teammate to use my car," I quip.
"But that's your Dad's..."
"Mr. Mehrotra, how dare you underestimate me like that! I've worked very hard to buy this car, and you think I've bought it with my Dad's money, calling it mine?" I respond with a hint of jest.
"I did not mean it like that, Anaisha. You know it. I just thought it was a family car because I haven't seen any other around. I'm sorry if I judged too quickly," he apologizes.
"It's fine. I'm sorry for overreacting too. My dad's car is just there," I gesture towards the car in the distance. "He just parked it ahead so that you guys don't have to search for a spot. You know how fussy people get sometimes about a stranger's car parked in front of their house," I say with a tinge of guilt. He simply nods.
"Samak..."
"I guess I should leave then; my family must have already reached home by now," he suggests.
Just as he's about to turn the key, he pauses and looks at me. "Were you going to say something?"
I shake my head and gaze up at him. Getting off his bike, he leans against it, arms folded in front of his chest.
"It's just that... I just... wanted to know if you were upset or something."
He bursts into laughter, leaving me puzzled.
"Of course not, Anaisha. Why would I be upset after you treated me to such good food, agreed to be my best friend, and even allowed me to use your car?"
"I just thought we..."
"What? That we had a fight?"
I nod.
"No, Anaisha, it was just a misunderstanding. You do realize we cleared it and apologized to each other, right?" he assures.
I smile at him, feeling a sense of relief.
"By the way, are you free anytime this week? Thought we could just spend some time."
"I honestly don't know, Samaksh. I'll check and let you know."
"Okay. No problem. I'll see you then. Bye," he smiles.
I wave at him, standing there until he disappears from my view. What a day it had been.
Being a first timer , writing this part was a bit challenging but I've tried my best to express all the emotions ,that come along, correctly .
Hoping to see some responses so that I know how I'm doing.