Authors note (PLEASE READ):This chapter contains family fights, homphobia and mentions of physical and verbal abuse.
-Boston, 2008, Friday.
Trixie took a taxi home, before everyone else. She looked through the window waiting to get to her house and remembered she didn't tell Katya she was going home. She took her phone out and texted Katya.
Trixie
Went home early. Took a cab.
And left the phone on the seat to look for the gum that was in her purse. She took the wrap off and started chewing as her phone buzzed.
Katya
k see you on Monday ;)
She didn't feel like replying so she left it open. Trixie grabbed her headphones and started playing "Sugar Water" by Cibo Matto. Rolled down the window and closed her eyes, feeling the wind mess up her hair.
Katya was flirting with her right?. Trixie couldn't help but doubt. What if Katya's just like that with everyone. Maybe she was ashamed of Trixie and that's why she went to the bathroom after being seen with her. Trixie has a devotion for overthinking every move she and other people make. What they say, how they react. Is a never-ending cycle of doubt and insecurity that orbits hunting Trixie's thoughts every day.
Was Trixie invasive? Did she scare Katya? Maybe Katya wasn't into her at all and all she did was creep Katya out. Trixie felt her hands get sweaty and her breath unstable. She took a few deep breaths as she noticed she was getting close to her house. She also grabbed a little bottle with gin she had and took a shot. The car stopped, she paid for the taxi and got out of the car the best she could without tripping. Trixie walked up to the door, noticed the living room light on. Her mom and her mom's boyfriend were fighting.
"I can't believe you're letting her get away with this!"
"Away with what? being herself?"
"She got that shit into your head didn't she"
"Trust me I tried to change her, stupidest thing I did"
"You'll see me try and succeed"
"Oh yeah?!"
"Yeah!" She heard the table being punched. She needed to get out of there.
Her mom stood up for Trixie but didn't respect herself enough to put a stop to the constant verbally abusive boyfriends coming in and out of the house. At first, Trixie was worried for her, she still is but now it's mixed with the anger she has from her mother letting Trixie gets abused by her now-dead step-father, out of the fear she had from confronting him.
She started to walk faster, trying to get away from the screams that were now lower. The worst part of this was that this has happened before. Coming home and having to go away because she heard them fighting. Sometimes the fights woke her up and she sneaked out to get away from the noise. Every time it happens it takes her back to her step-father screaming at her.
Tears started to stream down Trixie's face, ruining her makeup. She sat down on the side of the street. She took out the little bottle filled with gin and drank all of it, leaving it empty. She was at least not drunk enough to know she should go somewhere safe, so she dailed the first contact she had on her contact list.
"Hi, Trixie?" A raspy voice said
"Hi? Who's this?" Trixie said confused
"Katya, are you ok?"
"No, I'm on the street" Trixie stood up "I, I need a safe place to stay the night"
"Trixie I don't know anywhere safe I-" Katya was cut off by Trixie
"I'm sorry Katya but please you're the only one that I know that would let me stay over. Only one night. please" Trixie's voice was breaking.
"Violet and I will pick you up, where are you," Katya answered.
-
Trixie stood on the street. she was drunk enough to not overthink about what she just asked Katya and instead reach for another gum and put it in her mouth. She saw a black car turn at the end of the street. The lights blinded Trixie so she couldn't see if it was Katya and Violet or not. Then she saw the blonde girl get out of the car.
"Holy fuck, what happened to you?" Katya said joking but with clear worry in her words.
"They were screaming" Trixie didn't wanna cry again. "Maybe I'll tell you when we get to your house."
"Okay, get into the car"
Katya hugged Trixie from her side because she saw Trixie shaking because of how cold it was. Then she grabbed Trixie's arm and helped her get into the car. Katya sat in the backseat with Trixie.
"Are you sure you want her to stay at your place?" Violet said taking a glance at them
"Yes," Katya said
"But your dad-"
"I'll figure something out Violet" She looked out the window thinking about a plan, "I think he wasn't home tonight"
"What about the morning"
"She can sneak out. You sneaked out before right Trix?"
"Um, yeah. From my room window" Trixie turned from the window she was looking out of.
"See she has experience."
The car ride was 20 minutes, and Trixie was drunk and tired. She felt her eyes get heavy each time she blinked and her thought process get slower.
"Hey Barbie," Katya said
"What" Trixie replied with a sleepy voice
"Where is your phone? I'll tell your mom you're staying over at a friend's house"
"Yeah, in the purse"
"Thanks"
Katya started searching through the purse. She found the little bottle, opened it, and smell it. Her face shrunk and she didn't put it back in the purse. A few seconds later she found the phone.
"Any friend you could mention?"
"Kim"
"Okay"
Mom
I'm staying over at Kim's house.
Katya was worried. How desperate Trixie was to get away from her house. Katya wonders if she's out of her mind to let someone she barely knows inside her house. But she felt like she could trust Trixie out of the few hours she spent with her. They exchanged numbers like 3 hours after knowing each other. She rolled down the window and took a cigarette, lit it up, and let the smoke calm her down.
Trixie on the other side was almost falling asleep with the pleasing feeling of Katya's scent surrounding her. She closed her eyes, only the road lights shining through her eyelids. She felt her shoulders relax and her neck too. She laid her head against the window and let herself sleep. Shortly after Trixie fell asleep and Katya lit up her cigarette they arrived at Katya's house. Katya's father's car was nowhere to be seen so they both got out of the car.
"Text me if you need anything, be careful Kat." Violet said rolling down the window
"I will, mwah," Katya said blowing a kiss with her hand.
Katya took her keys and opened the door. Her house had dark grey walls, and dark wood furniture. The temperature inside was much hotter than outside. Trixie took off her jacket.
"Thank you, Kat," Trixie said
"I'm surprised that you're sober enough to talk"
"I've built up alcohol resistance" Trixie started looking into her purse. "I'm missing something"
"What is it?·
"There was a little steel bottle here"
"I don't know, maybe you left it at the party or somewhere else" Katya left her purse next to Trixie's on the couch. "Do you want coffee? To sober up"
"Yes, please. Thanks"
"Oh it's nothing" Katya stood up to go to the kitchen
Katya had the little bottle in one of her jackets inside pockets. She took it out and opened up a cabinet, put it in the back of it, and closed it. And she made Trixie her coffee.
"Kat" Katya jumped and Trix giggled
"What"
"Was I too much?" Trixie stared at the floor tiles
"What do you mean?"
"At the party"
"No, no you weren't" Katya was still giving her back to Trixie while making coffee.
"You don't need to lie, I was too much, I am being too much" Katya scoffed "Why are you laughing?" Trixie looked at Katya confused. Katya turned around, resting her ass and hips on the kitchen counter.
"You doubt yourself enough, no need to doubt my words Barbie doll," Katya said and then grabbed the coffee. Handed it to Trixie.