-', (chapter twenty two) ꒱ ↷🦋🥛
JIMIN QUITE LITERALLY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT to do with the information that Eden and Jungkook liked each other. Like- it's not like he can tell their business to everyone he comes across, but now that he had this knowledge, he felt like he had almost too much power.
But, Yoongi was coming over so he tossed that topic to the back of his brain and got ready. The initial anxiety that came with Yoongi's arrival had long eased over the past few weeks. They talked over text, a screen separated theme from face-to-face interaction but made it easier to express themselves without the vulnerability of having to look at each other. They didn't have to worry about the other seeing the blush on their cheeks or the cheeky, stupid smiles on their faces as they spoke.
It was easier talking that way and they loved talking to each other.
No one was home today, Taehyung was out at the skatepark and their parents were at work. So it was just Jimin and Yoongi alone once more. They were far along in their sculpture, they have the nose lips, they were beginning to carve out the eyes and it was starting to actually look like Jimin.
It was creepy.
Jimin set out the messy plastic covered in dried clay and out on old clothes he didn't mind getting dirty. He put in his apron and waited patiently for Yoongi's arrival.
So maybe Jimin did decide to put a little more effort into his looks, a little lipgloss, a little eyeshadow, nothing too grand or extravagant but enough to be noticed. He brushed his hair back to expose his forehead and smiled at himself in the mirror.
Great, he looked fine.
Jimin jumped when he heard the doorbell ring and quickly made his way downstairs to go get it. He rolled up the sleeves of his old crew neck sweater and sighed softly before opening the door.
Yoongi leaned against the doorway on his phone, but he stood up straight when Jimin opened the door, looking as though he had been caught doing something wrong. He tucked his phone away and smiled softly. "Hi." His eyes look over Jimin's features like he always does. He noticed that he was wearing a little makeup. His lips were plump and shiny, both his top and bottom lip of equal fullness. And the small amount of eyeshadow in the corners of his eyes makes them look sharper, more sultry.
The glossed lips pulled to reveal his pearly white teeth. Jimin had the most joyous smile in Yoongi's opinion. He was always happy about something, even when there's nothing to be happy about. "Hey, Yoongi."
"You look really pretty today...and every other day. But," he let out a deep breath, "you look nice." He shouldn't have spoken at all really but he couldn't help himself, it kind of came out.
Jimin's cheeks warmed like he had a sweet piece of candy in his mouth and it burned. "Thank you, Yoon. That's very sweet of you." He knew what he was doing. He knew who he made himself up for.
He let Yoongi in and the both silently got ready to continue their project in Jimin's likeness. It was so much easier to communicate over the phone, behind the safety of a screen where you don't have to fear the immediate, true reaction of their words.
But now they could see each other. The blushes, the glances, the silence between them. But when they did speak, it always ended in a smile.
They were already well into work when they spoke again. Jimin needed to sit in front of his mother's mirror so he could examine his own features for the projects. But in the slightly tilted mirror, he could see the way Yoongi kept staring at him.
"I know I'm cute. You don't have to stare." His smile is flirtatious, brazen even as he calls Yoongi out. Yoongi, however, is quick with the comeback. "Maybe I want to stare." It's a reaction, the flirting between them is more natural thanks to the texting.
"You're pretty enough to stare at." Yoongi was more natural at flirting than most would think. He was good at implications and double meanings in words. Girls were easy to swoon. They liked nice words. They liked sultry looks and small smiles just bordering on smirks.
By Jimin's reaction, he could assume guys liked it too. Humans were all the same really.
Jimin's face it up like a string of Christmas lights on his face, glowing red. He put on a smile gushing softly at his words. "Ah, you're too much, Yoongi. Such a flirt." His voice was way too soft for him to be okay. He was having a meltdown really but he played confidence.
"But you're cute too if you wanted to know."
"Really? I never noticed."
Jimin giggled softly, helping Yoongi carve out his eyes. Their hands were messy with the paper clay they had put over the head to keep everything together. More little words were shared between them as they worked, soft giggles and smiles.
Yoongi was more open about showing Jimin his smile now. He grinned wide, the corners of his lips turning upwards to expose his pink gums and straight, white teeth. That was the smile that made Jimin's heart race and slammed against his ribcage.
His smile was a marvel.
Jimin didn't know what came over him. Maybe he was simply in a kissing mood this week but her took Yoongi's face between his and leaned forward to kiss him.
Yoongi made no motion to move away and instead leaned in. He didn't know what he was doing, neither of them did. They were just being stupid, having a moment where they decided to just say "fuck it."
Their lips latched onto each other, moving carefully to test the waters before easing their way in. Yoongi could only think that he's never felt softer lips, lips clouds, or pillows. They moved deliberately, pressing hard, desperate for more.
And then they pulled away, panting softly as they stared at each other. Jimin's lipgloss was smudged across his lips and some was left on Yoongi's lips. They look at each other with wide eyes, questioning what they just did.
But they wanted to do it again. They wanted more. Their hunger for each other was one that couldn't be bayed by cute smiles or texts. They wanted each other, no- needed each other.
So they kiss again, more confident this time. Jimin moves closer, his fingers running through Yoongi's hair with his wet fingers. He didn't care enough to notice, not when Yoongi's hands were finding their way under his shirt, feeling up Jimin's heated skin.
Their tongues lap against each other, pressing and exploring each other fueled by desire.
Yoongi did what he felt was natural. He wasn't exactly sure how to go about this. He felt uneasy, unsure. He was scared.
But Jimin tried to help him along. He placed his hands over Yoongi's and smiled softly against his lips. "You've never done this before have you?" He asked him and Yoongi shook his head. "I've never been with a guy before." He admitted shamefully.
In reality, he still didn't know if he even wanted to be with a guy. This would change a lot in his life and he was scared of that. He was scared of the disgust of his conservative parent's faces. He was scared of the permanent judgment from the world.
Even if it meant rejecting who he is and who he wanted.
So Yoongi pulled away, startling Jimin who nearly fell forwards when the man slid away from him and stood abruptly. His hands clenched into fists and his posture was tense. "No."
Jimin's face fell and his brows pinched together. "No what? Did I do something wrong?" He slowly stood up to look at him at eye level.
The green-hair boy shook his head. "No- no you didn't. It's just-"
"You regret it." Jimin finished for him. His eyes seem to gloss over and his lips pressed tightly to stop from trembling. Yoongi's cheeks have his handprints in them in clay, smudged but noticeable of where his hands had been when they kissed.
"I'm not gay, Jimin! Okay?" Yoongi told him. He didn't raise his voice often and it startled the young man standing a few feet away from him. His strong voice wavered. "I'm just not. It was a mistake."
A mistake.
Jimin turned his head as tears swelled in his eyes and his bottom lip quivered slightly. "You kissed me back." He whispered softly. "If you weren't into guys you would've told me to stop the first time. You pulled me back in!" The poor boy was screaming at him now, crying. "Are you not gay or is that just the internalized homophobia talking? Do you not like guys or are you just afraid of what people will say?"
Those words gave Yoongi a lot to think about.
He sobbed. "Fuck you, Yoongi. Fuck you for making me like you, for making me spend all this time. For pulling me back in and then calling that a mistake. Go fucking fuck yourself."
And Yoongi took it, watching Jimin, red in the face, tears streaming down his cheeks yell at him. He gave Yoongi all the curse words he had in his vocabulary, English, and Korean.
"Get out." Jimin finally settled. Using the sleeves of his sweater to wipe his flushed, tear-stained cheeks. "I'll finish the project on my own. Don't come back, don't text me. I don't want to see you ever again."
Yoongi could feel tears pricking his eyes as well. This was the better. Without Jimin near him, he could go back to normal, go back to categorizing himself. Even if it breaks both of their hearts.
"I'm sorry." But Jimin just turns away from him and his words don't reach him. He doesn't want to hear it. He just wants Jimin to leave.
He listens to him make his way over to the front door and put his shoes back on. The door cracks open in the dead silence and soon it closes back again.
And Jimin breaks down. He sobs again, crying even harder than before. This was what he gets. He should've known that this wouldn't work out. It was too good to be true.
Jimin sat on the floor with his legs up to his chest and put his head on his arms.
Fuck this. Relationships were overrated anyways.
*.✧ Kᴀʏs Eɴᴅɪɴɢ Nᴏᴛᴇs
Yep. Now, I want to stress that Jimin isn't made at him for saying he isn't gay. He knows that he can't make Yoongi be whatever he wants. He's mad at Yoongi for leading him on. Flirting with him, kissing him back, etc. Just wanted to make that clear.
Thank you all for reading. I hope you guys enjoyed and I wish you all a wonderful day/night.
사랑해
~Kay U ´꓃ ' U