Izou the Therapist: His Thoughts
On the night where Irin had not shown up for dinner, a certain man in a kimono entered her room, well, his room. He had knocked a few times but there were no answers which was strange so he slowly and gently twisted the knob of the door. "Irin-sama? Is everything okay?" he asked, but there was no reply. With his soundless entrance, he crept deeper into the room. The candles in the room were lit but Irin was fast asleep, rolled up into a ball with her knees tucked to her chest and her head craned downwards. Much like a foetus in a womb.
'She's asleep' Izou concluded with a sigh as he made his way towards the exit as he put out the candles that were lit. However, Irin's soft mutters had caught his attention.
"I'm sorry, Ace... Please don't hate me..." she mumbled in her sleep, bringing her knees closer towards her.
Izou frowned a little at her words, 'What happened between the two?' he thought as he remembered how Ace refused to eat during dinner and seemed unusually glum. He pursed his lips together as he walked towards Irin's sleeping figure and gently tucked her under the warm covers of the bed. Noticing the tear stains on her gentle face, he knew something had happened between the fiery boy and her.
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As he silently closed the door and exited the room, Izou was met with a certain freckled ravenette pacing around a few metres away from the entrance to the room. Ace had his thumb in between his lips as he bit onto the nail of his finger, walking around in circles impatiently. His head hung low and his brows knitted together, as if in deep thought. The freckled boy was unaware of Izou's presence as he continued to pace around speedily, whisked away by his own thoughts.
"Ace?" Izou called out.
There was no reply, Ace continued to walk around in circles with the occasional inaudible mumble to himself.
"Ace!" Izou called out once more, this time actually capturing the attention of the fiery young man, "Are you okay?" he asked.
The freckled boy only looked at Izou with wide eyes as he formulated his reply in his head, "I-- Er... Is Irin awake?"
Izou shook his head gently, "Sadly, no. Irin-sama is fast asleep," he replied, "But is there anything I can help you with?"
Ace frowned, wondering to himself if he should seek guidance from Izou since he was quite close to his pink haired friend. Deciding that he should ask for the opinion of the man in the kimono, he looked at him and voiced his concerns, "I... I think I've hurt Irin's feelings and... I don't know what I should do now..." he said, quietly but audible to Izou's ears.
Izou raised his brow, "Isn't it common knowledge to apologise after you've done something wrong?"
"Yeah but..."
"But?"
Ace let out a grunt of frustration. He knew he should apologise but something stops him. His pride and the slight fear that his apology wouldn't be accepted. "Will an apology even make the cut?" he asked rhetorically.
Izou crossed his arms together, the sleeves of his kimono neatly tucked beneath one and another, "Of course an apology would make the cut, why wouldn't it?"
"It's just... I fucked up pretty bad," Ace said as he stared at the ground in deep thought.
"Okay and...? Are you sorry about what you did? Do you want her to know that you're sorry?" Izou asked.
The freckled ravenette snapped upwards, "Of course I feel sorry about what I did! In fact, I feel terrible, like I've just done the worst thing in my whole entire life!" he exclaimed, unable to contain his worry and his guiltiness.
He slumped down on a nearby chair, burying his wavy locks in his hand as he frowned, "I wanna say sorry but I don't know how... What I did... What I said to her was... Terrible... and I feel like I can't be forgiven but at the same time, she means so much to me that I can't imagine us never being friends ever again."
"I want her to forgive me but it feels like it's just wishful thinking and it's stupid but... Ah forget it, I'll figure something out..."
Izou frowned, "Ace, just apologise to her. That's all you've got to do."
Ace looked up, "I know, but..."
"But?"
"I..."
Izou waited for Ace to continue but he only frowned and stared at the ground. He looked at the freckled boy expectantly, awaiting for his elaboration but has formulated a few thoughts in his head. "Ace... Are you scared of apologising to Irin-sama because you're afraid she won't accept your apology? Or are you too prideful to tell her that you're sorry? Because if you're afraid that she won't accept your apology then you're just being stupid," Izou said, uncrossing his arms and pulling a chair to sit next to Ace.
Ace looked at Izou with his eyes wide. The man in the kimono had just hit the bullseye. He remained silent as Izou continued to stare at him, once again, awaiting his reply.
However there was none to come, Ace only remained silent because Izou was absolutely right. The beautiful man took his silence as a reply and concluded that Ace's pride was hindering his goal to apologise.
"Ace, when was the last time you apologised for Irin for something you've done? Just do the same thing, it shouldn't be that hard," Izou said.
"I-I've never said sorry to her before..." Ace admitted, avoiding Izou's gaze on him.
The man stared at the freckled ravenette, eyes wide in shock, "What do you mean by that? Have you never done anything to offend her before?" he asked.
"I-It's not that!" Ace stuttered, "It's not that..." he repeated, clearing his throat before doing so.
Izou squinted as he looked at Ace with visible confusion.
The freckled boy sighed, "I...I've never apologised to Irin before because she was always the one to apologise... It didn't matter if I was the one who hurt her, it just didn't matter. She always apologised to me; for being hurt, for taking it personally, for anything. She always found a way to take the blame so I wouldn't feel bad about it and I-"
"I hurt her... I told her that I thought that she didn't trust me; that I thought that she thought that our friendship was a mistake when in reality she was the one who cared the most! I just--"
"I'm just terrible! And after all the hurt I've given her; all the times when I should've been the one apologising; I still want her to come back to me! I still want her to forgive me even though I know she shouldn't because if someone else were to do the same thing to her I wouldn't want her to forgive them. Isn't this just selfish of me?!" Ace groaned, feeling the pricking of his tears on his eyes.
He was not one to cry easily but just the thought of her walking out of his life scared him.
He knew that she wasn't the type to do that but there was this fear that this may have been the last straw. Ace was afraid and guilty. He had to admit that he wasn't always the kindest to her when they were kids; he always made fun of her and pulled tricks on her, sometimes his words would leave invincible wounds on her.
After she left to join the Navy, he missed her a lot and thought about the memories he had with her a lot. He realised that he hurt her a lot when they were younger, especially when they got into arguments but, even in his memories, it was always her who apologised.
"Yeah, you are selfish, Ace and if this continues she'd really leave you one day, even if she doesn't, I'd make her," Izou said sternly, "So change the pattern. Be the first one to apologise this time. Let her know that you're sorry and that she matters to you."
Teary eyed, Ace looked up to face him, "Izou but I... I don't know how."
"Oh come one, Ace! You can't be that stupid! You know what to say but your stupid pride is clouding your judgement! Tell me, what does Irin-sama mean to you?! Does she worth less than your stupid pride?!" Izou raised his voice, anger present in every single word he uttered, for the very first time, "Irin-sama is the kindest, most beautiful and the sweetest person I know and I won't allow her to feel hurt! I know she has problems at work and I want to help her but the only person that can help her is you because the person that she trusts the most here is you and she only wants you!"
"Ace, I ask you again, what does Irin-sama mean to you?" he asked once more.
The freckled ravenette, with tears dripping from his eyes as he stared at Izou with wide eyes, "Irin is... Irin is everything to me... She does everything in her power to make me feel comfort and she always tries her hardest to understand me... She takes care of me, worries about me and she's just... always there for me. She's just so amazing..." Ace said, smiling at his words.
"She's like an old lady and a child at the same time... She comes up with the weirdest thoughts but at the same time she worries so much like an old woman. Oh and she can also be pretty scary at times, like when she gets angry even I get scared but most of the time she's just so... sweet, so gentle and so... happy... I want her to be the happiest person in the world because that's what she deserves... She's the most wonderful and most beautiful person in the world...Irin just... means the world to me, she always has," Ace concluded, no longer tearing up from frustration but instead smiling at his memories of her and with her.
Izou smiled at Ace's words, 'He loves her...' he thought, happy to know that the fiery boy that sat in front of him harboured such strong feelings for the pink haired girl whom he cared so much about.
"Ace, just apologise to her. Let her know that you're sorry and let her know about your feelings for her," Izou said, getting up from his chair.
"My feelings for her? What?" Ace raised a brow.
Izou deadpanned, "Must I spell everything out for you? Just tell her you love her before someone else sweeps her off her feet and she isn't exclusively yours anymore. In case you forgot, Irin-sama is a rather attractive woman and it'd be a shame that after your little spiel about her that you don't tell her how you feel," he said, turning around to face the freckled man before he left.
Ace turned cherry red at Izou's words.
The moment that Izou said that someone may sweep Irin off her feet, Ace couldn't help but feel his heart clench and that was how he realised that... he had been in love with his best friend for all those years.
The reason why he picked on her so much as a kid was to get her attention.
The reason why he didn't like how close she was with Thatch and Marco on the first day of their reunion was because he was jealous.
The reason why he wanted her to need him was because he was in love with her.
All those years, all his bullying and teasing was all to capture her attention; so she had a reason to talk to him.
Ace had been in love with Irin since they were kids; since she accepted his heritage with an open heart and with the brightest grin on her face.
Portgas D. Ace had finally realised that he was in love with his best friend, Ryuu D. Irin.
The problem for him now was whether she loved him too or not.
A/N: I'M SO SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE!! I WAS BASICALLY BRAIN DEAD YESTERDAY SO I APOLOGISE FOR UPDATING A DAY LATE!!
also i have an extremely big examination in 15 days and i'm freaking out right now so bad bc im literally a huge ass idiot lol. i won't be writing for awhile but, fret not, i'll still be updating bc i've already saved up quite a few chapters for y'all, i just hope it'll be able to last til my exams end.
as usual, thank you so much for reading my story and voting on em! i really really appreciate all your support and it's crazy how many reads we're on already! thank you thank you thank you soooo much! i love y'all so much and i hope y'all have a great week!