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Chapter 31
Riley
I can't decide if I'm claustrophobic or honored that Aiden doesn't want to leave my side. He's been so attentive for the past couple weeks. I know it freaked him out when Adam escaped jail and came after me. I was scared too, but I can't stop living my life. And neither can Aiden.
He's had someone from his family with me, if he has class or practice. Landon, Wyatt, and Sawyer have taken turns walking me to or from class. Hunter, Colby, or Emery stick close at the apartment. And Aiden is by my side as much as possible.
It's not a bad thing. I'm just used to being alone. Having to depend on others to be with me has only reminded me how often I'm alone. As an only child, and having a single working parent, I learned to accept the loneliness and take care of myself. I'm independent that way. I'm just not used to being taken care of.
The holidays flew by so fast. It's the first time I didn't go home to my dad, even though I really wanted to. He understood and planned on working anyway. He said that Fran would be there and they would have a small Christmas with her son. He didn't seem to mind me being gone, I guess he's gotten used to me not being around.
I stayed at the apartment and studied for the most part although I was persuaded to join the Bradford's for dinner. I declined going on Christmas Day when they opened presents. I didn't want anyone to feel obligated or awkward about it. It was for the best although Aiden was upset I didn't come. We had a quiet moment for our own Christmas.
Money has been very short, and even though I got an extra check from the Bradford foundation, I've watched every penny. I couldn't get myself to cash the foundation check and ended up returning it once the office was opened on campus. After my run in with Adam, I don't want to take another dime from their foundation. I'll just have to find another way to pay for classes next year.
Aiden wasn't happy with me when I explained it to him. I know he's the reason I got the check. I know he pushed for me to get more than my share. I don't want his money, and I don't want to give anyone a reason to say I'm with Aiden for his money. If I take money from the foundation, it will only open up the opportunity for more criticism from others like Adam or even the press. I won't put Aiden through that.
So, I'm back on the job hunt. I need something close to campus, so I can walk to and from. My car is on its last leg, I think. It's been sputtering and grinding when I've used it. I think it's better to just let it sit until I can get it fixed. Which I can't do until I get a job.
I've looked at a couple other diners and the coffee house close by. I've asked at the student services center and admissions. I've talked to my business professor and advisor. So far I've come back empty handed. I need to get something soon if I want to eat. I won't sponge off the girls or Aiden but my coffers are getting way too low.
Aiden tried to reason with me about it. Believing that I would agree when he said I need the money, I lost my temper. I'm well aware that I need the money. I'm aware that by refusing his offer I put myself in a crunch. I'll get through it just like I always have. Being broke isn't something new for me. And that sparked just one more argument I've had with Aiden this week.
I didn't get to see much of him over the holidays with bowl games, family and my job hunt. Aiden is preparing for the combine and the draft. Between practice and his family getting ready for Georgia to have surgery, he's been busy. They're all worried about her, with good reason. Georgia is the backbone of their family. She's such a wonderful lady.
It's hard for them to see such a strong independent woman struggling with health problems. She doesn't complain or mope around. Georgia is much too feisty for that. She deals with what is thrown her way and faces her challenges with her head held high. I bet she wins too. Georgia is too obstinate to do otherwise.
Aiden is off with Blake today working on his reps. I know he's trying to juggle so much, not just with school and football but with his family, the business and then there's me. I've made his time with me more complicated, even with the truce over my money issues, it's tense. I can't help but wonder if we should take a break until things calm down for him. I wouldn't blame him if he needs it.
Sitting here alone at Georgia's long dining table, in her huge kitchen, I feel small and insignificant. This family is so big and each one of them has an important role to each other and to the family as a whole. It reminds me that the place I had with my Dad seems to have been filled. And I don't fit there anymore. I don't fit here either. So, where do I fit?
I'm studying for my English literature class but I can't seem to concentrate. I feel like I'm intruding in her home without her being here. I've been told it's fine for me to be here, but I feel like an outsider. Aiden dropped me off, telling me he'll be back when they're done to take me home. I just feel in the way.
Aiden doesn't feel that way. He loves me. He said so and I feel the same way. It's just hard to get time together lately when we're not sleeping. It seems we just pass each other on campus or he drops me into someone's lap to babysit me. I hate that. Some alone time with him would be nice but it won't be happening soon. Not with Georgia's surgery and Adam's hearing coming up. Aiden's commitments with school and football monopolize any free time he has, so sleeping together is all we get. And not the fun kind. We're both too tired for anything more than snuggling up to sleep.
Hearing the steady clip of high heels on the wood floor, I figure it's Hunter here to check on me. I'm surprised when I look up and see Chloe in the doorway, looking a bit worn out and perturbed. She inhales and lifts her chin as if making her decision and comes over to stand in front of me on the opposite side of the table.
She doesn't sit, which tells me I'm in for a lecture. I already know she doesn't like me. I'm dating her son and she doesn't approve. Whether it's because of Adam's opinion of me or she thinks I'm not good enough, rich enough or smart enough doesn't matter. Her mind is made up that Leighton is the better choice for Aiden and he's not capable of choosing for himself.
I don't agree with that.
"I'd like to talk to you. I know you're busy with your studies but this is important. It's about Aiden and his father." Chloe has kept her distance from everyone lately. I know Aiden thinks she's helping Adam get out of jail. It's possible, given she wasn't very happy about my relationship with Aiden to begin with.
Setting my pencil down and closing my laptop, I give her my full attention. I'm prepared for her to try to persuade me to break up with Aiden. I'm even ready for her to try and bribe me to leave. I wouldn't put it past her to even make something up to get what she wants. Obviously, I don't trust her or anyone else at the moment.
"I realize you're working on your studies, so I'll just get to the point. Adam and Aiden have a very complicated relationship. Your relationship with Aiden has strained it further." Chloe stands stick- straight, her chin up and tension is clear, even through her eyes. She's not comfortable talking to me about this.
Well, that makes two of us.
"If you're going to try to convince, persuade or threaten me to leave Aiden, you can stop right now. Aiden loves me and I love him. You won't change that." I announce our feelings as if this relationship is set in stone.
I know he could change his mind about me. I know he's going to be traveling with a team and possibly move to the other side of the country once he's drafted. I know he could walk away without a second thought, but for now, he's mine. I'm going to treasure what we have, because I know there's no guarantee of tomorrow.
Chloe pulls the chair out and sits down. Her hands clasped together on the table as she leaned forward to speak. "I'm aware Aiden has feelings for you. Just as I believe you have strong feelings for him. But both of you are so young and his life is about to change dramatically. I just think you need to step back and see what happens before you get so attached. I'd hate for either of you to get hurt."
"Why?" Tilting my head, quizzing her on her motives. "What does it matter to you how I feel or if I get hurt? I know you don't approve of our relationship."
"It's not that." Closing her eyes and rubbing her face she sighs and starts again. "When I met Adam, we were in high school. He was larger than life back then. He was a wide receiver on the team and I knew I loved him from the first time I saw him. See, I was a lot like you. I came from a very poor family and my biggest asset was that I was smart. So smart, I had been chosen to tutor the football team. That's how we got together. I was his tutor."
"You weren't his father's choice?" I wondered. Is this why Adam is so against us? Because he's unhappy with his marriage, he assumes Aiden will be unhappy as well?
"Oh God, no, not at all." Chloe gave me a sympathetic smile. "He fought Mike tooth and nail for me. But when Blake got drafted and Adam didn't, their father was furious. In the end, Mike chose Blake over Adam. Blake always seemed to be Mike's favorite. Believe me, he played favorites with his boys, he would pit them against each other and it hurt Adam badly. No matter what he did, it was never good enough for Mike."
"I'm sorry about that, but that has nothing to do with me and Aiden." I don't see how Adam's relationship with his father correlates to us.
Chloe takes hold of a napkin and begins to tear it into tiny pieces. "We were happy for a short time, then I got pregnant, and was busy with Aiden. Adam went to work with his father when he didn't get drafted. While Adam was so determined to get Mike's approval, he spent every moment he could working. That's how we drifted apart." Her eyes misted with the memories.
Clearing her throat, Chloe continued. "When Blake got drafted as starting quarterback, Adam was pushed aside further by their father. It got ugly many times between Adam and Blake. The biggest problem was Adam's jealousy of Blake. It has ruined Adam and the man I fell in love with so many years ago."
I know that love doesn't always turn out the way you hope. I know that sometimes love is temporary and fades. It's sad and it hurts, but it happens more often than not. To find that once in a lifetime love is rare and should be cherished. Chloe and Adam either didn't have the love she thought they did, or they didn't work to keep that love going. I'm thinking it's the latter.
"Even after Mike died, Adam kept trying to be like the man. It wasn't long before he found another bed he preferred to occupy other than mine. Actually, he found several. When I first found out, I was devastated by the news. I was so stressed, I began to neglect Aiden. Blake and Emma stepped in. They were there to help me and Aiden through some very difficult times. They were a godsend. But it only made matters worse between Adam and I."
Hearing this I understand why she's worried. Her husband broke her heart because they wanted different things. But she's projecting her own life onto ours and that's not fair to anyone.
"Adam has always been jealous of Blake and as Aiden grew, his connection to Blake deepened. Blake has been like a father figure to Aiden. Blake was the one who was there for him, every ballgame, everything school function, every time he was needed, Blake was there. Adam dove into work and his affairs so deep, he missed seeing his son grow up. But Adam expected his bond with Aiden to be there when he never took the time to nurture it. So, instead of a close bond, like Aiden has with Blake, Adam's relationship with his son has dissolved to nothing." That explains why Aiden keeps people at a distance so well.
"Any kind of relationship requires attention and care. That falls on Adam's shoulders, not a child who doesn't understand why his father has abandoned him." Hearing her story makes me appreciate my dad and all he's given me. I have an amazing relationship with my dad. One I can see is similar to what Aiden has with Blake.
Chloe nods, agreeing where the blame lies. "Aiden was always a bright child. He knew what his father was doing without a word from me. There were nights when Adam didn't come home that Aiden would find me crying, or he would listen, when I would talk to Blake or Emma. I knew if I left Adam, I would lose Aiden and everything I had. So, I've learned to turn my head from his indiscretions."
"Then you're as guilty for the situation as he is. If you don't respect yourself enough to stand on your own feet, then you're going to get walked on." I would never do that. I have more pride in my own abilities than to let someone treat me like I don't matter.
"You're right. You're not the first person to say something like that to me. But when you're on this side of the relationship, it's not so easy to take that step away." Chloe's shoulders slumped and I could see the fatigue and hurt on her face as she continued. "I've never held a job. Adam insisted I be home. I hosted business dinners for him, arranged parties and volunteered at different functions for the company. I raised Aiden with the expectation of having more children. When it was clear one was it, I took care of Isabelle's and the others as they were born. It gave me a purpose when I didn't have one. My marriage has been in name only for years. Adam has a volatile personality, he lies, he cheats and will do anything, anything to get his way."
"I'm sorry you're unhappy in your marriage. I'm sorry Adam is this way, but you're still a vibrant woman with a future. Don't let Adam hold you back from your dreams. You went to college, didn't you? What happened to your degree?" I ask, thinking she just needs a little guidance to take that step.
Chloe sadly tells me her dream. "Yes. I have an associates in Hospitality management. I wanted to have my own bed and breakfast. Nothing big, but I wanted to take care of my guests. I guess in a way I've done that with the children. When Adam insisted I stay home, he said it was simpler than starting a career only to leave when we had children. I believed him."
And that was her mistake.
"Chloe, I'm sorry for everything you've gone through. While I appreciate you telling me all of this, I'm sure it's not easy to talk about. I'm a little confused as to why you're telling me. What exactly are you trying to get me to do?" I doubt she's saying all this just to explain why Adam is a jerk.
"I want you to think long and hard about the decision you make with Aiden. His life is going to be on display for the world, that means yours will be too. He's going to be on the road more than he'll be home. And there will be women throwing themselves at him. I saw it all with Blake and Derrick. You need to know what you're in for and think hard about what you're willing to accept from him. Aiden isn't interested in a long term relationship. It's not what he needs right now with all the other pressure on his shoulders. Just think about what I've said before you get into something you can't handle." With that she got up to walk out.
Leaving me to think about what she's told me and make up my own mind on what to expect from Aiden. But Chloe only got to the doorway, when Aiden walked in looking as if he walked in on a cat fight between me and his mother.
Aiden
I've got the weight of the world on my shoulders lately. Doing reps, working out, taking my frustrations out on the field is what seems to be getting me through everything. What I'd really like to do though, is spend some quality time with Riley.
I've had no real time with her since we got back to campus. Classes are piling on the last semester assignments, coach and Blake are pushing me to spend every waking free time in the gym, on the field or planning my strategy for the combine. But what I need to get my head in the game is a night of Riley.
Just her and me. Dinner out, away from the crowd. Maybe we can rent a movie and lock ourselves in her room or mine. Just the two of us to regroup. The last time I really talked to her I told her that I love her. I meant it too. But then we were interrupted by family and I never got to find out if she feels the same.
We've been busy. School has taken over our lives again. She spends most of her time studying or job hunting. That's a sore spot for both of us. After everything Dad said to her, Riley is now refusing to accept any more money from the foundation. She won't even take it from me or the girls.
We had a huge fight again last night over it. I know how hard she works in her classes. I know she doesn't have time to take on a job but she's determined to carry her own weight. I love that she's independent and I know she's not with me for my money or the family name. But I hate not getting any time with her. I want my girl with me.
It put me in a shitty mood today. Fighting with her, taking her to grandma's house and leaving her there alone, with us barely speaking to each other. It sucks and all I want to do is punch a fucking wall. Better yet, I'll punch dad. This is his fault anyway.
At the gym with Blake, the guys met us and we hit the weights with a plan to play some ball after our workout. It's a good way to take out some of my frustration and relax for an hour with the people who know me best. And they push me just enough to knock some of that weight off my shoulders.
I'm still pissed.
Blake nudged me trying to get me to tell him what happened. "Spill it, kid. Riley make you sleep on the couch last night?"
I guess she could have done that but it wouldn't have changed my mood. The only difference would be a crick in my neck. It's not like I got any sleep in her bed. I laid in the dark and listened to Riley breathe all night and tried to figure out how to fix everything.
"Aiden! What happened? You two had a fight?" Blake pushed a curse out of me when I got my fingers pinched between weights on the bar. "I'll take that as a yes. About what?"
"She returned the foundation check. She doesn't want to take anymore than any other student gets. Blake, she's not just any other student. She's mine! I just want to help her so she doesn't have to get a job, so we can spend a little time together." I gripe lifting weights over my chest up and down.
"She's not like most people, Aiden. Sometimes you have to let the woman you love go, so she can come back to you. It killed me to let Emma go off to college and that was knowing I wasn't ready for her. But when I was ready, I chased after her and wasn't taking no for an answer. Maybe you need to give her some time." I already know what happened between Emma and Blake. It's not the same with me and Riley. I'm not dicking around with every chick who wants to get her claws into me.
"I told her that I love her." Sitting up, I slouch on the bench, finally opening up about what's bugging me.
"And how'd that go for you?" He sat across from me drinking his protein shake and letting me take my time to talk it through. I can't get my head straight until I figure shit out.
Shaking my head, I open my water and guzzle it down. "We got interrupted and I don't know... she hasn't said it back. I thought she would but... Maybe I was wrong." I kick the leg of the bench in frustration.
"Okay, back up. She is going through a lot. Between losing her funds for school, the stress of money problems, looking for a job, keeping up on her classes and you've got her under house arrest." He points out everything Riley is dealing with knowing I don't always see the whole picture.
"I know that but I'm not taking any risks with her. Dad went after her once, he won't get to her again!" I'm adamant about that. I'll make sure Dad gets nowhere near Riley again.
"And I'm sure she appreciates it. But Riley's independent and you're holding on to her pretty tight. I know why, and I'd probably do the same thing. She just isn't used to what our lives are like. You grew up in the spotlight, Aiden. Riley didn't." And I get that too, but it has to be pointed out again.
I have never been intimidated by the press or being looked at like I'm something special. I've been treated like I'm special all my life. I'm used to it. Riley isn't. She's shy, quiet and not the type of person who yearns for the spotlight. That was Leighton and I hated it.
Blake is right. I need to give her some time and probably some space to adjust to things. I love her. I want her to be by my side through every step I take. She's the girl I can see myself with next week, next month, even years from now, I can see her with me. But until she can too, she isn't ready.
"So I have to step back from her, like you did with Emma? I don't want that." Protesting his suggestion, we walked towards the stadium to work on the field.
"Then take some time to get her caught up to you. Until you're on the same page, this isn't going to work." Blake knows better than anyone just how hard this is. I can't imagine not talking to Riley for three years to get my shit together. I won't wait that long.
I did forward passes, backwards passes, I stayed in the pocket and went out to drive touchdowns. I did handoffs, up the middle and even did a sneak. No one could touch my plays, no one can tell me the problem I have is with my game. Like Blake, football has never been my problem.
"Aiden, you need to relax, dude. Adam's in jail. He's not getting out anytime soon. Riley's safe." Sawyer reminds me as we headed back to the house.
"Has Blake found any clue as to where he put all the money he took?" Landon wondered the same thing the rest of the family has been doing.
All of us have looked in the house, cars, safety deposit boxes. There's no sign of it. Matt and Blake have even hired a private investigator to help find his mistress, thinking she might have it. So far, we've got nothing. I'm at a point of going to see the old man myself and just ask him straight out.
"He didn't get rid of it." Harper scowled, just as annoyed with the situation as the rest of us. "It has to be around here somewhere. What about your mom? Wouldn't Chloe know something?"
It's a possibility I've thought about myself. I just think mom is going to be on dad's side this time. I know the whole situation between them and she has stayed married to him despite everything he's done to her. I know she loves him and in the end is willing to stand behind him. Even if she doesn't agree with him, I'm pretty sure she is going to help him.
"She's not going to help him this time. He's gone over the line." Sawyer believes in the good in each of us.
I'm not that optimistic. "You don't know that."
My mom has had every reason to walk out on dad and she hasn't. She's stuck through the worst he's done including who knows how many mistresses. He's lied, cheated and neglected her and me. Yet she stood by and let it happen. What most would say no more to, she's allowed without a peep. I don't know if she has no spine or just doesn't care what he does.
We walked into the house and straight back to the kitchen. Having spent most of our childhood in this house, it's like a second home to all of us. With Grandma back in the hospital and her surgery set for tomorrow, we're all pitching in to watch the place.
It's a jolt to find mom standing in front of me and Riley sitting behind her at the table. From the expression on their faces I'd say they were having a pretty intense conversation. Mom looks like she's been crying and Riley looks like she just had her ass chewed out. I believe that is exactly what has happened here.
"Mom, what's going on here?" My eyes darted between them waiting for an answer.
"I was just keeping Riley company." Mom announced, trying to make it sound so innocent. But one look at Riley's face told me she was lying to me.
Walking around my mom I headed straight for Riley. The guys caught it too and blocked the door so mom couldn't escape that easily. As I stepped up behind Riley's chair she stood up, turning to face me as if I was going to let her move away from me.
No way, I'm finding out exactly what went on here.
"Aiden, what's wrong? What happened?" Her hand touches my chest and I pull her into my chest.
"You tell me. What did she say to you? Don't say nothing, either. I can see both of you are upset. So what happened?" I keep Riley snug in my arms looking over her head at my mom.
"We were talking about you and your father. I was explaining the situation to Riley. Really Aiden I didn't say anything that was out of line." Yeah, I'll be the judge of that.
"Come here." I took Riley's hand guiding her through the room to the pantry. "Don't let her go anywhere!" I shot over my shoulder to the guys.
Bringing Riley into the large closet where Grandma keeps all her really big pots and pans, dry goods and paper products I close the door behind us and look down into those deep eyes.
"Tell me, Riley." Her eye roll tells me I'm not forgiven from last night.
I should have known I'd have to fix things between us before she gives me an inch. Fine, I'll deal with that first then I want her to spill. She has to understand I'm not going to let her get hurt, especially by my family. I'm going to protect her, whether we're together or not.
"I'm not going to let you just walk away from me because we had a fight. I love you. You're the girl I want with me. Every game, every day, every night. I just want you. I'm sorry about pissing you off. I know I've been pushing the money thing with you. I just want to take care of you. I know you're independent and can handle it yourself but that doesn't mean you have to do it alone. Can we please make up now?" She stays quiet searching my face for something I don't understand. I've apologized, I don't do that often but I will for her. Whatever she needs.
"Can you say that one more time?" Her request confuses me.
"I'm sorry? I don't want you having to do everything on your own." I start to explain myself again but she shakes her head.
"No, no. That you love me." Riley smiles and her face lights up. "I want to hear you say you love me again."
That's an easy request to fill. Wrapping my arms around her waist and holding her against my chest I look deep into those eyes just so she knows it's true, every word. "I love you Riley. I want tomorrow with you, and next week, and next year. I just want you. I love you."
My head falls down to rest my forehead to hers and I wait. It takes a second before Riley closes her eyes and shudders out a shaky breath. Her hands cup my cheeks and the quick shaky nods tell me she's forgiven me.
"I love you too. I just needed to be sure I heard you right the first time. I love you and I understand that you want to help me, but this is something I have to do for myself. I appreciate that you want to help me, I do, but you can't. Not with money." It's frustrating she won't budge but we'll figure it out. At least she's not mad anymore.
Pulling her up on the counter island we talked for the first time in a week without arguing. She explained what mom had to say to her and that she was concerned about our future. I have to agree with her that it's not going to be easy or simple but I know we can make it.
Somehow we're going to find a way.
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