September 02, 01:12 P.M.
"Appa! Fwast, we have to go." Soomin jumps in her chair, an excited glint in her eyes. The father smiles at his energetic daughter, an endearing smile gracing his lips.
"First eat up then we can leave." Haneul brings a piece of meat held between chopsticks to Soomin's mouth. Just yesterday she was sick but it's as if Haneul's promise to take her to the park boosted her recovery in the morning. He pats the girl's head and strokes her hair, tucking her locks behind her ear. She gobbles up her food, buzzing to leave their house.
Soomin is dressed in a pink plaid skirt and a black tee, denim jacket wrapped around her waist, just like the jacket her father is putting on, matched with black jeans. "Let's go, Minnie," Haneul calls the girl with a hand on the door handle, putting on his white Gucci loafers.
"One minute, appa! I will get my hair bwand."
Haneul chuckles at the child's eagerness and turns to the door, opening it. He jolts when a man falls at his feet, then quickly scrambles to his feet, blinking his eyes rapidly. The doctor gawks at the figure in front of him, his eyes wide. "...Why are you here again?"
The man sucks in a breath and presses his lips together giving no answer.
Haneul squints at the other's black attire, failing to understand if it's a fresh pair or the one he had worn last night. "Don't tell me..." he adds, observing the creases on his hoodie, messy hair, and the bags under his eyes. "...You were outside my door since last night?"
Dae Ho's brows shoot up, a hand clutching the side of his pants. "I-I j—"
"Are you out of your mind! The corridors get freezing in the middle of the night. How is a hoodie enough to— I mean, wasn't I explicit about staying away from my family?" Haneul clears his throat, mentally facepalming at the slip-up. "This is my last warning, leave before I call security." He sighs with a grimace.
Dae Ho chuckles, but it's void of humor. "Didn't think I'd be this revolting of a sight for you." He dips his head and looks through his thick lashes. "But I can't leave. Just let me be near, I'll be like a shadow, you'll not even see me, it'll be as if I'm never there. You have to believe me when I say there may be a threat to you."
"Why would anyone target me? I'll just hire a bodyguard then, you don't need to be here. I'll hire him not because I need one and believe you but because I don't want you here." Haneul's words are bitter but the younger doesn't relent. "What mess did you make this time? Why are you doing all this!"
"I don't know! I'm sorry, alright! I would never hurt your family. I didn't mean what I said to you in the basement. It was—"
"But your actions say otherwise. I'll never forget that day."
"I'm lost! I've been for a while now. Everything I try to hold, I crush it. I've been running a marathon for years with no direction, can't even stop to look at my surroundings and breathe. It's one thing after the other and I have lost sight of myself. When I left, I thought I was doing the right thing but here I am, as incompetent as I was years ago." Dae Ho puts his hands together in a plea. "Give me some time till I detangle myself from all this. I'll leave for good this time, never waste another second of your life. I'll disappear and know this time it really will be the end. So, please...just this once," he pleads. "Let me leave without regrets."
The words sound a lot like a goodbye, a prepared farewell. And Haneul falters at the sincerity in the fighter's tone, his truthful eyes. "I—"
"Uncle Jiswoo! When did you come?" Soomin interrupts her father and Haneul is grateful for it. He didn't have a reply for Dae Ho, unsure of what'd leave his lips next.
The girl is already koala hugging Dae Ho's leg, his hand reaching for her head on instinct but stopping right above it, eyes glancing at Haneul. "You're looking lovely today." He settles for the compliment instead, hand dropping by his side. "Are you going somewhere?"
"Yes! I and appa are gowing to pway in the park." She then turns to her father and runs to him. "Appa, can Uncle Jiswoo come with us?" She bounces, ecstatic hands grappling his jacket.
"Uh...I'm sure Uncle Jisoo is busy so—"
"I'd love to come with you Soomin." Dae Ho interjects at the first chance he gets, the little girl's eyes lighting up at the statement.
"Yay!" Soomin pumps her fist in the air with a cheer and Dae Ho turns away from the glare that's directed his way. The father scoffs at how his daughter takes Dae Ho's hand and walks towards the elevator. He's lucky Soomin likes him or Haneul would've never let him tag along. The tension in the elevator is heavy, thick enough to slice it with a knife. The lowering from the 17th floor to the ground feels like hours, Haneul busying himself with his mobile phone while Dae Ho finds staring at his boots interesting and Soomin hums a merry tune, blissfully unaware of the tumultuous nature of the situation she caused.
The ping of the elevator draws relieved twin breaths, the men awkwardly glancing at each other and exiting the space. Haneul grabs Soomin's hand and walks to his car parked in the lot while Dae Ho exits the place to mount his bike. He follows the doctor's car till they reach a park.
Soomin wastes no time in running to the slide, waving at Haneul when she stands at the top. The park is crowded with people, parents relaxing under the trees and breathing fresh air while the children busy themselves playing. Food trucks and toy stalls are scattered around the place, the smell of coffee and fried food tickling empty stomachs. Spotting three wooden benches, Dae Ho sits at the left corner, Haneul opting for the right seat corner, farthest from the other man. Although the park is lively, the silence between the two is unnerving.
Dae Ho cards his fingers through his hair, combing his unkempt ebony locks. He pulls the elastic band on his wrist and loosely ties his hair into a bun, strands from the sides falling over his temples. He observes Soomin, the girl enjoying herself without a care in the world. Her lips are permanently pulled up into a wide grin, impatient hands and buzzing legs help her with the rides. A thought clicks his mind and Dae Ho realizes it's the very park where he first met Kim Soomin. Warmth spreads through his chest at the memory of the child tearing up after her ice cream fell to the ground when she bumped into him and the way she rejected his energy bar but changed her decision the next moment. He never did buy her an ice cream then.
Dae Ho stalks up to the white ice cream truck, his hand reaching for his wallet. "I'd like one strawberry ice cream."
"Coming right up!" The girl in a beret and apron chirps, pulling out a cone and preparing the ice cream. "Here you go, sir."
The fighter thanks her and pays, making his way to where Soomin is. He waves a hand to gain her attention, the girl's eyes sparkling at the cone in Dae Ho's hands. She runs to him with a cheeky grin. "This is for you," the older man says, hand extending towards her but unbidden fingers wrap around his tattooed wrist, tugging it, and the ice cream falls.
"Appa!" Soomin shrieks in displeasure, her lips stretching into a whine.
"Don't," Haneul warns Dae Ho, earning a tilt of a confused head. "I don't know what you put in there—"
And Dae Ho visibly deflates, his eyes blowing wide momentarily, mouth parting in surprise. "Right," he lets out a strained apology and walks away, shrinking back on the bench he was on before. The accusation was nothing less than stabbing him in the gut repeatedly. Does Haneul think he has stooped so low? Then again, his activities have been aiding in bringing out the doctor's resentment. Dae Ho closes his eyes and leans on the back of the seat. It's alright, the weaker the lingering connection with his former friend, the easier it is to let go, because undeniably, Dae Ho loathes himself more than anyone ever could.
He stays put, the whirl of thoughts taking him to places he usually visits. The domes of anger, regret, self-hate, and helplessness. They have been his loyal companions just like the glass bottles of alcohol.
The arrival of an additional presence beside him brings him out of his reflections.
"I'm sorry," comes a soft apology, a whiff of sandalwood and lavender, Bleu de Chanel, invading Dae Ho's personal space. "That was uncalled for. I—I don't know what came over me, I've no—"
"Don't apologize, Haneul. You did what you deemed right."
"No, that's an excuse. What's wrong is wrong and I don't like disregarding people's intentions. I know you meant no harm. It's just...when I see you, I lose my cool. The events in the past months back my behavior up, rendering me unable to talk civilly. And it hasn't been simple trying to figure you out. One moment you're a hollow shell, void of the Park Dae Ho I know but then there are instances you stagger, a glimpse of someone vulnerable, asking to be saved."
There he is, the Kim Haneul who unintentionally solves people's personalities as if they were easy arithmetic problems. The skill that makes him effortlessly adapt and draw others towards him, creating a sense of belonging. It's always been therapeutic to have quiet conversations with the doctor, stripping off the masks they put up when stepping out into the outside world. A two-sided conversation with both parties trusting their exposures in the hands of the other.
"As I said, I'll be out of your hair soon. Don't worry yourself with trivialities." Dae Ho crosses his arms eyes forward, focusing on nothing in particular. It's a silent disagreement to stop with whatever Haneul wants to talk about.
"But—alright, at least you could buy my daughter ice cream before she kills me with her death glare." The father chuckles, shaking his head. "Also, get me whatever you're buying for yourself."
Dae Ho directs his gaze to the said child, who is sitting on the edge of a sandbox, her lips pressed together in an adorable scowl, head cradled in her palms. The fighter doesn't need to be told twice, he jogs to the ice cream truck and buys Soomin a new one.
"Where's mine?" Haneul asks when Dae Ho approaches him.
"You said to buy whatever I was getting and I didn't want anything."
And Haneul would really like to throw a punch at the younger.
The day passes by uneventfully, the heavy silence replaced with something along the lines of awkward and peaceful stillness. There's air that needs to be cleared between Haneul and Dae Ho but they make a non-vocal consensus to leave it for now.
"Goodbye, Soomin." Dae Ho bids the girl standing outside Haneul's main door. "Sleep well."
"Bye-bye, Uncle Jiswoo." Soomin twinkles, waving her hand erratically. She steps into the apartment and removes her shoes, running inside.
"Then I'll be off," the fighter continues, earning a nod from Haneul, the door closing when he moves away.
Haneul releases a long sigh, the day has been unexpected, he'd need a hot shower to let everything sink in. He prepares Soomin for bed and proceeds to have some time for himself.
It's two hours later when he's all suited in his cotton night suit that a thought nags him at the back of his mind. He rolls on the bed dismissing it, then distracting himself with his mobile phone but it doesn't help. "Ugh!" The doctor groans, throwing away his comforter and moving the blue strands falling on his face.
He scampers to the main door with long strides, opening it wide in one go. And all his suspicions are affirmed when he finds Park Dae Ho sitting beside the entrance, a crate of beer on his right, hands rubbing over his arms to create warmth.
"You've got to be kidding me..." Haneul pinches the bridge of his nose in annoyance. "I had a feeling you would still be here." The older man had forgotten why Dae Ho was here in the first place.
"Don't mind me," the fighter replies, patting the dust on his bottoms. "I will not be a nuisance to you any further."
Haneul stares at the other dead in the eye. "You're being a nuisance by doing this." He blows his cheeks out, moving away from the door and making space. "Just...just come in."
"No, it's al—"
"Come in before I knock you out and drag you in."
"I—okay." Dae Ho shudders, picking up the beer pack.
Haneul has his hands crossed over his chest in a demanding manner, a brow rising challengingly.
"What?"
"Throw that in the garbage and enter. I have a child in the house."
Dae Ho does as he's told and walks into the apartment with unsure steps.