TW// anorexia, mentions of shelf-harm, slight shelf-hate
"Bad" he hummed in response "I want you to know that I love you." A blush appeared on his face as the words escaped my mouth.
"I love you too Skeppy..."
No one's Point Of View:
The two,,, friend? Couple? None of them really knew what they were. But instead of thinking about it, they had to put those thoughts aside and lay down in bed. The brunet buried his head in the chest of the taller one to get more comfortable.
Silence consumed them both, though it wasn't an awkward. Neither of them were tired but decided to stay quite in order to enjoy this moment. After a while, the shorter looked up in the other's eyes, which sparkled and stared right back.
"What is it?" said Skeppy, catching the other off guard. "Hm? What do you mean?" Bad said tilted his head in confusing. Skeppy always loved when he did that. In his mind, he looked like a small puppy, waiting patiently for an answer.
He leaned forward and whispered in a low voice "You are staring Bad". Bad looked back at him with a semi-annoyed face but scoffed and giggled. "Why are you laughing?" Skeppy asked, not being able to also hold back laughter.
"You were also staring" Bad said, his voice being muffled by Skeppy's hoodie. Silence descends once again while they think of something to discuss. "You feeling better Bad?" was the question that echoed around the room.
Bad opened his mouth to speak but decided against it. A gloomy atmosphere grew around the two. "I am asking because I love you. And I care for you." Small kisses were placed on top of Bad's fluffy brow hair.
"I am happy that you are here with me." Those words were said in a soft voice, calming Skeppy down for his previous worries. "Me too" was the only right answer he could think of.
They spent a little longer just relaxing with each other, nothing really being said. Eventually they got hungry, but neither of them wanted to leave the other's embrace.
BadBoyHalo's Point Of View:
My stomach started to ache; I never liked this feeling... I knew I had to eat eventually, even if I didn't want to. I am starting to realize how hard it is to stop these thoughts from corrupting my mind.
I just want to be happy. I have everything I could have asked for so why; why am I like this?
I feel something tugging my sleeve and look up to be met with Skeppy's gaze being laid upon me. "You were going pale; everything alright?" he asked me, genuine concern could be heard in his voice. It made me calm down a little.
"Yeah I fine, just thinking..." I stated, readjusting my posture. "Do you think we should go to the store? I don't want it to get too late." Skeppy gave a nod in response and both of us got up and ready.
I was dressed in black jeans matched with a dark red hoodie which sleeves were black. Skeppy was wearing a pair of blue, slightly ripped, cuffed jeans, matched with his icon teal hoodie.
We headed downstairs and while he was putting his shoes on, I tied the leash around Lucy's neck. "You ready?" I heard as a hand reached out, helping me get up. I accepted the offer and with little to no power I got up.
We opened and closed the door behind us. It feels like forever since the last time I got out. The fresh air hitting my face felt nice and relaxing. Our hands intertwined as we made our way to a restaurant which I remember going a few times in the past. It wasn't that far away so it shouldn't take that long.
As much as I love the outside, I have grown an irrational fear of people, thinking that wherever I go, everyone is staring at me. Which I hoped to be false.
We entered the small restaurant and sat down in a table for two. The atmosphere seemed really nice. The shop was filled with beautiful plants and a soft tune was playing in the background. I couldn't recognize it though.
A waitress came and we both made our orders. I settled for rice, since I knew it was a small portion of food. Once they left, probably to tell the chef about our orders, Skeppy looked at me with discomfort.
He looked as if he wanted to say something so badly but was holding back with all of his willpower. Did I do something wrong again? I really hope I didn't...
Only a few minutes go by and both of our dishes arrive. We ate in silence, speaking when a random topic came up. I finished my food way faster than intended and the look on Skeppy's face had turned into a smile. I knew it was fake.
I scratched Lucy's ear to distract myself from my thoughts. This dog was truly a miracle. She shifted in her seat and was now lying upside down with her paws up in the air. I gave her a small high five while petting her surprisingly soft fur.
I made a mental note to give her a bath when we get home. Speaking about going home, Skeppy called for a waiter in order to pay them so we can leave. Hopefully he had fun today. The last thing I would want is for him to be angry at me.
" We can leave now" Skeppy stated, a smile across his face. This time it seemed genuine. Maybe it was last time as well; did I judge him without knowing? I am terrible.
"Bad are you there? Hello?" I snapped back into the real world, I need to stop zoning out. "Yeah I am here sorry, I got lost in my thoughts." He walked next to me, picking up Rat and then grabbing my hand. We said our goodbyes to the waiter that served us and left.
"So, did you have fun?" I asked him hoping that the answer would be yes. I would hate myself if it wasn't. "I had a fun time. Whenever I get to hang out with you my day always becomes a little brighter" I couldn't help but smile at what I heard.
I will treasure those words no matter what happens.
"You're blushing ~" he teased me. I didn't really care if I was at this point. I could even feel my face heat up. I probably look like a tomato right now. I scoff at that image. Skeppy gave into a fit of laughter and giggles.
"Thank you Skeppy, I had fun today." For some reason those words fell out of my mouth and sounded really bland. I wasn't sure if I had fun. This is getting really confusing.
"I am glad you did. Want to go home and relax? We can stream tomorrow if you want to, no pressure though." He suggested, picking up pace while walking. "I would like that."
Skeppy's Point Of View:
Reaching into my back pocket I pull out the keys for the house. As soon as we enter Rat rushes to the couch, probably to relax. I look at my phone and notice the time being "6:34". We stayed out longer than I thought; I guess time does pass faster when you are with people you love.
"Aw, look Geppy! Rat is doing the thing again; the one where she has her paws in the air!" I heard the voice next to me point out. I shifted my eyes to look at the small dog rubbing her back with her tongue out. I took a quick picture, knowing Bad might want to post it later.
"Can you send me that picture?" he immediately says like he read my mind. I open Telegram and look at our past conversations. It breaks my heart a little but I decide to ignore it, not wanting to ruin the mood. "I sent it."
Speaking of ruining the mood, I probably messed up while we were at the restaurant. Bad had a worried expression whenever our eyes met. Was I staring at him?
I know when we were ordering our food and Bad placed his order I was,,, disappointed? Angry? Why was I mad at him? He is trying his best and I am over here getting irritated by the food he wants to eat. Why am I acting so selfish?
"Skeppy" the voice spoke, dragging out the 'y' I hummed in response, not paying attention to what he had previously said. "I was asking if you wanted to go upstairs to..." he stopped. Did something happen? "To talk..." he finished; his eyes fixed on the ground.
I hesitated before muttering a small 'sure', grabbing his sleeve and pulling him upstairs, to his bedroom. He didn't really put an effort in moving which worried me a lot. Was the thing he wanted to discuss this serious? I gulped and pushed the door open.
Bad approached the bed and I watched as it dipped when he sat on it. He was avoiding eye contact clear as day. Not wanting to make him uncomfortable; I sat on his chair. His eyes trailed the entire room before they landed on me.
"So, um; Skeppy wanted to ask you something?" he said making it sound more like a question than a statement. "I-sure I guess." He took in deep breathes and closed his eyes. "I really appreciate you being here and I love every second I spend with you, I mean it." He took in more breaths.
"Even in the bad time, you are there to comfort me and I am super grateful for that... And I hate to ruin the mood but-"Tears starting to fall down his face and as I got up to wipe them off his face he opened his eyes and looked at me with red eyes.
"Did you stream without me before I came upstairs?"
'Uh-oh' was the only word that was circling in my brain. I could play it dumb but on the other hand I hate lying to him. But then again if he finds out he might hurt himself; worse than before... Maybe I should just ask him to make sure we are thinking about the same thing. I am pretty sure the vod was deleted so I can trick him.
"Huh? No, I don't think I did. I might have accidentally gone live though? I can check your twitch." I said pulling up the website and searching his name. "Please don't play dumb with me. You probably deleted it..."
Oh and of course he FIGURES IT OUT! God I just want to find a hole and crawl inside it right now. "I-No I didn't delete anything, don't w-worry Dare-" A loud sob put my sentence to an end.
"PLEASE! I-I saw a tweet when we were streaming and it mention a 'previous stream'; please Skeppy explain...please" I messed up again. I got up and hurried to the side next to him. "I apologize. I didn't want you finding out. But p-please don't cry! I didn't say anything bad.
After a small period of time of me giving him a very vague explanation of what happened, he nodded his head and buried it on my shoulders. I could feel his tears getting soaked by the thin fabric. "I- thank you. Thank you for doing that, I don't think I would have the confidence to."
"It's okay, I should have told you earlier I just didn't want to stress you out." He shook his head meaning a 'no' "Do-don't apologize; I was the one to ruin the mood." A trail of tears and sobs started as soon as he finished his sentence.
I turned my body around in order to face him. Wiping all of his tears away, I leaned forward to leave many kisses all over his face and neck. I wanted to make sure he knew I was here and that he was loved. "It's okay, I am glad you opened up your feelings to me."
"I appreciate that a lot Bad"
[Word Count:2.039]
[Author's Note]:
Sorry for the shorter chapter but recently I have been suffering from the worst headaches. I apologize for not updating stuff earlier, I will try to post once a week at least :]. Forgive me if there are any typos or grammar errors. As always, I hope you enjoyed this one, it wasn't as angsty but prepare yourselves owo. I hope you have a good rest of your day / night! Remember to eat / drink something. See you next time :DD
-Mel