Ananya Prasad
I can feel the dead chill spread through me. I can see anger, hurt, disappointment, sadness, guilt seeping into their gazes. They could be blaming themselves for destroying their childrens' life where in reality I am the culprit. I shattered whatever little hope they have.
But, the question is how would they know?
"Why are you staying in the hostel instead of the apartment?" my mom started.
"Ma, I am so-"
"I asked her to leave the apartment", he interrupted me. I whipped my head to see him.
"Why?" his mother asked.
"I thought it is better to be this way at least until Sharanya arrives and understands the situation" he explained.
"I don't want the relation between Ananya and Sharanya to worsen. I want them to sort out their misunderstandings regarding this marriage. She doesn't know anything about what happened after she left. And I don't want her to blame me or Ananya for marrying. Once everything is sorted with Sharanya, then we will start our life together" he told them further.
I know what he is doing. He is trying to shift the blame onto him for this situation. He is also pacifying our families by avoiding divorce and cleverly citing Sharanya so that they won't pressure us. He knows that they will never give permission for a divorce so he is trying to diffuse their worry and downplaying the situation. He is trying not to hurt our families and also indirectly assuring me not to worry.
I always thought that he is a crude and arrogant person especially when he asked me to marry him for the company as soon as my sister left. I never in my dreams imagined that he can be this sensible and capable of handling crises so well. He didn't rat me out even when he got the chance and instead shielded me from the wrath of our parents even though I was nothing but, selfish with him. I found a new respect for him.
"Why didn't you guys tell us before taking such a big step?" his dad asked him.
We both stood silently not answering the question.
"I know my daughters, Arjun. Even though I didn't see you for the last fifteen years, I raised you once Arjun. Do you think I will believe if you take this blame on yourself? Did you think I will trust that Ananya has no part in this? I know her Arjun. Do you think I don't know how my daughter thinks? So stop playing us", my mom told him angrily. My mom knows us too well.
"Pinky, I know Sharanya will misunderstand this situation. But, what happened is because of her decision. She took that choice to leave her marriage and now she has to bear the consequences. If she can't even understand what you did for our families, then it is time you let her go. I don't want you guys to jeopardize your relationship because of her" my mom told us.
"We all gave you both time so that you guys will work this out without us crowding you. We didn't expect you guys to drift further apart. Now, enough of this hide and seek. From now on, you both will live with us in our home. I don't care if it is difficult for you guys to commute" his mom ordered us.
"Mom..." he was interrupted before he started.
"Lakshmi is right, Arjun. It is time for both of you to stop thinking of others and focus on your relationship. It is good that Lakshmi had a spare key for the apartment and she came to cook for both of you early. Otherwise, we never would have found out about you guys living separately and about your decision to divorce" my mom informed us sadly.
Arjun sir and I looked at each other and then looked at my mom. Only four of us know about the decision. Me, Arjun sir, Karthik and Sid. I am pretty sure now that either Sid or Karthik ratted us out.
"Don't blame Sid or Karthik" my mom chastised me once she saw my expression.
"They told after so many threats and pleadings," his mom told us.
His father, my dad, and Srikanth are silent not at all opening their mouths.
"So it is decided. You guys will live here from now on" his mom reminded us again.
I just stood there silently when Arjun sir and his mom are arguing about this. What should I say? I couldn't even face his mom without feeling guilt. By now she must have understood that we both told her lies that everything is fine between us. She must hate me for ruining his son's life.
"Mom, what you are saying is impossible. It will take thirty minutes for us to go to the hospital from home and don't forget the rush hour traffic. I understand we both made a mistake and we will rectify it. I will guarantee that we will both stay in the same apartment. And you have a spare key and you can use it any time you want to check" he told his mom aggravated. "Do you think forcing us to have a relationship will do any good?" he fought with her.
"You are right. But, leaving you guys alone is also not doing any good. How can we trust you guys after this?" his mom asked him with the same aggressiveness.
"Just trust me once mom. Please" he negotiated with her.
"Lakshmi, Golu is right. Forcing them to have a relationship is not good" Amit dadu spoke for the first time.
"Pinky and Golu, what you both did was wrong. I did not expect this from both of you. Marriage is sacred. I asked you specifically before marriage whether you are sure or not. I never thought you both will take the institution of marriage lightly. But, you are right. We can't force you to have a relationship. We can tie the horse at the lake but cannot make it drink water. For this relation to work, you both have to put in your efforts and time and for that to happen you both will stay here from now on as a family" He continued.
"and if you both feel that you guys want a divorce after a year, you will get a divorce.."
"Papa..." Lakshmi aunty and my mom both interrupted at the same time.
"Let me finish" Amit dadu scolded them. I have never seen him this angry.
"As I said, you will get divorced after a year if that's what you both want but not before at least giving this marriage a chance. Even if you apply for a divorce now, the court will ask to do the same. So, you both will shift here by this weekend" he gave us an ultimatum.
Even Arjun sir is silent after this. Amit dadu is not the type to give orders. He will always give us a choice in any situation. His ordering now means he is that much hurt and angry about this.
We didn't speak throughout the return journey. I can feel his anger and for the first time, I am scared to even talk to him. He dropped me at my hostel and left. I can't help but feel guilty for betraying everyone; his parents, my parents, Amit dadu, Sharanya, and him. Everyone is suffering because of me. I don't know what to do in this situation. No matter what I do someone is bound to get hurt.
It is clear now that our families will never accept a divorce. Even though Amit dadu gave us a year to adjust, when the time comes I am pretty sure that our mothers will do something to stop the divorce. So if I have to get a divorce I have to hurt everyone including him. He is the main victim here. He will be ridiculed his entire life for this. It will be a scandal and I am not sure whether the hospital board will let him succeed after this scandal with the sisters. He does not deserve that. What will the relatives think? What will the staff in the hospital think? I have already hurt him so much. Will I be able to hurt him more? Can I live with myself knowing that I ruined everything for him?
And on the other side is my sister. From childhood, I gave her hurt. I am the reason she felt so depressed and lonely. And today I am the one who deprived her of the love she craved. I am the person who married the person she loves. Will she ever forgive me? If I continue this marriage for the sake of our families and him, will I ever consider him my husband? Will I ever be happy with him? Will I be able to live myself knowing that I ruined my own sister's life?
How would anyone choose?
How will I ever choose?
*********************
Hi, my devils,
Sorry for the delay. Things were hectic at work and I did not have time to write. And writing is much more difficult than I thought. I wrote three versions for this chapter and edited them many times. Hence the delay.
Please forgive me.
I also want to give you guys fair warning that this book is going to be a slow burn. The characters won't love each other overnight so the romance buildup would be a bit slow. So be patient.
And please do vote and let me know your feedback in the comment section.
Have a great day.