"Don't ever care and the rest is hidden now. Could it be that we are just the same? Or can it be that, can it be that? I don't wanna wait, not anymore. Do you see straight through them? I don't wanna wait, not anymore. Well, you see straight through me."
Sexual content. Viewer discretion is advised.
DAY ONE
DECEMBER 23, 1978
"Ready?" Remus asks, watching me fasten my trunk shut.
It's officially the start of the winter holidays and I must say, Remus Lupin helping me get my bags is an interesting way to kick it off. He woke me up and forced me out of the comfort of his warm bed five minutes short of six AM, all of the sake of "not being late."
I let out an exhausted sigh, the sensation similar to water filling my lungs starting to return. My chest sinks into my stomach when I realize what it is. "The full moon is coming," I've been so wrapped up in all my minimal issues that I completely forgot.
Mood swings and near constant fatigue, here I come.
Remus cast a quick charm on my bag, making it extremely light before he hands it off to me. "I know, but that's still almost two weeks away. Try not to worry about that right now,"
I begin to walk out of the Ravenclaw dormitory, taking one last look before my departure. I will never feel as comfortable anywhere else as I do here, not even my own home. I haven't even left and I already feel like something is missing.
"Fine. Then i'll just worry about seeing my aunt and uncle for the first time in years. Petunia too," I mutter.
God I hope she isn't as dreadful as she used to be.
"Or you could just not worry about anything at all," He says with a shrug, grinning, before we exit my common room.
I can't help but smile back, "Well that doesn't sound like me at all," I tease.
"You know what's not like you? I haven't seen you light a spliff in a while,"
"Ahh you've noticed," I say, actively avoiding disgusted gazes by passing Slytherins, "Well it hasn't been that long but i'm trying to refrain from all intoxicating substances for a while."
Remus glances at me but continues walking, "Why?"
Because you, Remus Lupin, get me high enough.
Because you, Remus Lupin, have gotten me addicted.
"Just feel like it," I reply nonchalantly.
We finally reach the great hall, where we're supposed to be meeting our friends before boarding the train. As I stand besides Remus looking at the large double doors, there's a sadness coursing through my veins. After we part ways i'll most likely only see him at James' new years party and on the full moon. The latter sounding more bearable.
I huff and push the doors open. Remus and I are both shocked to see our friend groups sitting at the same table. Talking. Normally. There aren't assigned seats during the holidays but this is something I would never expect.
On one side of the table is James with Lily sitting to his right. On James' left side sits Sirius who's accompanied by Iris. On the other side of the table is Amos and Peter, who both look less than pleased with Sirius. Perhaps we should start a club.
"Uh-Hello," I greet them skeptically as I take a seat next to Amos. Remus sits across from me, next to Lily.
"What's uh, what's going on here?" Remus asks slowly, eyes looking all over.
"We are being civil," Iris says with a smile as Sirius feeds her a strawberry.
"Civil?" Remus asks, distaste leaking into his tone.
"Civil." Sirius repeats before looking at me. "Evans, consider this my formal apology."
I roll my eyes, "Real sincere,"
"See, that's an example of not being civil," James chimes in. I give him the finger. "Lily! She gave me the finger!"
"This isn't going to last five minutes," Remus predicts.
Amos and I nod in agreement.
"Hey, where did you disappear to last night?" Amos asks. I feel my cheeks warm and look over to Remus who's smirking subtly.
"Wouldn't you like to know," I taunt him.
Amos looks confused, "Well, yeah, that's why I asked,"
I laugh loudly, "You're a dimwit,"
Amos tosses his arm over my shoulder like always, "Maybe," He leans in a little, and out of the corner of my eye I see Remus glaring daggers, "But I still want to know,"
Remus says something under his breath, an action that Amos hates regardless of who's doing it.
Amos tilts his head. "What was that?" He asks, turning to face Remus but keeping his arm around me.
Remus straightens in his seat. Rest's his arms on the table. Leans foreword a bit. "I said, she was in my bed, mate. Since you want to know so badly,"
"I wasn't asking you though, was I? Mate," Amos counters.
"Hey! Let's keep it civil," I intervein. Although, the thought of them fighting is intriguing.
"See, now she get's it," James says.
After that, breakfast passes uneventfully and we all start our trek to the Hogwarts express. We arrive and wait to board the train as students scurry on, excited to see their families. Very un-relatable.
"I'm gonna go find Ashlynn before we board," Amos says. "Ris, Delia, i'll see you when I see you,"
"Don't forget to write!" I call after him, he turns and sends me a large smile.
"What a dick," Iris mutters. "Can't even leave us with a proper goodbye,"
"I don't like him either," Remus adds. Iris high-fives him.
"Cordelia, you picked a good one," Iris smiles wide.
"I didn't pick anyone."
"Ouch!" Remus clutches his chest and fiends hurt.
"Can we just get on the train?" Sirius asks, picking up his luggage and leading the way.
James and Lily are hand in hand. "Someone's bitter," They say in unison, following behind him momentarily.
Lily turns to face me as soon as we step onto the train, "Oh, Delia, it's so wonderful you're gonna be spending Christmas with us! When we find a compartment we can go over your sleeping arrangements! And we can make an itinerary for all the activities we want to do this week! Oh! And—"
Remus cuts her off, sensing my unease, "Sorry to burst your bubble Lil's, but Cordelia and I are gonna sit alone,"
She frowns. "So you mean it's just gonna be James and I with Sirius and Iris?"
Peter clears his throat.
"And Pete," Lily adds, sending a sheepish smile in his direction.
"Yeah and we better go now if we want an empty one," Remus urges. He takes my hand, "Let's go,"
"We'll probably find you lot later," I tell them quickly, as Remus pulls me along.
After about five minutes of searching for an empty compartment I begin to grow impatient. I slide open a compartment revealing two third years, Ravenclaws.
"Out, now." I tell them, crossing my arms. They stare at me blankly in shock.
"Well, you heard her, get the hell out," Remus backs me up.
They quickly grab their bags and exit the compartment. I let out a triumphant sigh when I finally sit down.
"I think you might be a secret Slytherin," Remus jokes as he sits across from me.
I lay out completely on the seat and rest my arms behind my head. "Not with this muddy, half-breed blood,"
"Don't say that," Remus mutters in a grave tone.
"But, it's true. I'd be surprised if I finish this year without getting murdered because of pure blood supremacy. Might be a cool way to go though," I chuckle at the thought. What if the last face I ever see is one of a death eater? Hopefully, it'd be an attractive one.
"Can you be serious for a minute?"
For whatever reason, a petty bubble in my brain has decided to pop. "You'd like that, wouldn't you,"
I freeze.
"What?" Remus asks, standing up.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
Don't back down Cordelia. You've gotta see it through now.
I stand up, ultimately feeling a bit less confident when i'm reminded of our height difference. "I said, you'd like that. Wouldn't you?"
Remus rolls his tongue on the inside of his cheek and nods slowly. As if he's considering something, something important. "And you think that's funny,"
It's not a question. It's not a confirmation.
It's a challenge. A dare to say 'yes' and see what lies ahead.
Surely he doesn't think i'll give up on my curiosity that easily? Doesn't he know he's dealing with a Ravenclaw?
My palms sweat and I swallow thickly. "I think it's hilarious." Remus doesn't say a word, he just watches second by second as I become increasingly more nervous. "And I think it's hilarious how you tease me for being jealous, as if you don't loathe Amos."
"I'd be careful about what you choose to say next, love," Remus suggest as he stares at me intensely.
Jokes on him. I never choose what i'm gonna say, it just comes out. "Or what?"
Like that.
Remus gives me the same smile he did the night we were in the shrieking shack and places his hand on the side of my face. Rubbing my cheek softly with his thumb,"Or you're gonna have to put that pretty little mouth to better use,"
I mimic his smirk, "I'm prepared for that outcome,"
His lips meet mine once in a simple peck. "Are you sure about that?"
"Positive."
"Then I guess I get to say it again," Remus says, removing his hand from my face.
I try to ignore the cold sting on my face where his hand was. "Say what again?"
He kisses me again, roughly this time. I tug some of his hair and he groans into my lips, his hand trailing down my shirt and then underneath. He makes no moves to my breasts, his large hand holds the small of my back instead. Before he sits, Remus begins to undo his belt, "Get. On. Your. Knees,"
I get down.
He casts the silencing charm, makes the door lock, and the curtain draw all at the same time.
I reach to pull down his pants, surprised to find his dick is already hard. He inhales sharply when I run my hand up over his boxers, before I move closer. "F-fuck, Delia...what are you waiting for ?" He mutters. I rub my thumb across his tip, making his hips buck and he practically whimpers, "Please,"
Now this I had done before. And this is my chance to leave him in the same flustered state he had me in last night.
I can't possible leave him in this state for any longer. I wrap my hand around and begin stroking him, he lets out a groan of relief that has me instantly soaked. His gaze is drunken and lustful, and his breathing quickens with my pace.
I bite my lip as I look up at him from between his thighs. Remus is completely at my mercy—his chest rising and falling, his cheeks flushed, his fist clenched at his sides—he's totally desperate and it's fucking hot. I think it's time to graciously give him what he wants.
I lower my head, licking a broad line up his length before taking his tip in my mouth and swirling my tongue across the sensitive area. Remus' deep moan sends shivers down my spine and only encourages me more.
"F-fuck... don't stop..." He groans between ragged breathes, as his head falls back and his hips buck slightly at my touch.
I stop. "Where's that personality of yours gone, Remus? You were so talkative before..." I take as much of him as I can down my throat. Remus moans loudly, his hips rocketing upwards.
"Just like that, baby,"
Baby? Since when? That nickname usually makes me want to vomit up and down the walls, but something about the way it comes from Remus' moaning mouth gives me butterflies.
I begin bobbing my head up and down, putting pressure on him with my tongue while I use my hand to stroke the part of him I can't reach. Remus' moans are heavenly, at one point he lifts his head to watch me, which only encourages me more. I lick and suck harder, trying to keep an increasing pace despite his constant involuntary thrust.
His groans get louder and his thrust get messier, telling me he's close.
"Y-yes...yes...oh, god."
I suck hard, hollowing out my cheeks as I pull my lips off him before going back down to repeat the process. I'm trying my best to please him, but he's so big he's making me gag.
Remus gasps and whimpers, "Delia—i'm getting so close, I don't think I can— f-f-f-fuck..."
He is, indeed, getting close. I can feel him twitching in my mouth, and I give it my all.
"Ahh—shit, Deails, I can't—" he groans, his breathing speeding up, but he's interrupted by his own sudden cry as he releases down my throat.
I gag slightly as I pull my lips off him, swallowing hard, and breathing heavy. I sit back on my knees, wiping the corners of my mouth with my sleeve, and watch Remus in his ecstasy. Clearly he's relaxed now.
He meets my eyes as he lifts his hips to pull his boxers and pants up. "Come here," he instructs, and I obey. I hover over him and rest my palm on his chest as he kisses me deeply. I can feel his heartbeat racing under my fingertips, and he pulls away.
"Do you see the humour in my joke now?"
Remus lets out a weak chuckle, his cheeks still very pink. "I believe you believe it was funny,"
"You frustrate me like no other Remus Lupin,"
"Would a nap help at all?"
☽☽☽
The black lake is perfect still, calm, as if it had frozen over. The only way to distinct it from the frost covered solid ground, is the reflection of the full moon on the surface. I sit under my favourite large tree, taking in the view.
As I sigh in content of the quietness, I light up my joint. After a few puffs and coughs, it's fair to say i'm properly blitzed. There's rustling beyond the trees of the forbidden forrest causing me to jump to my feet and scan my surroundings. A futile effort because it's almost completely dark outside.
Even high, I know not to follow, until I hear the whimpers of what sounds like a dying dog. I step out from under the tree I'm taking refuge under slowly, one step at a time heartbeat thumping in my ears.
Step, thump thump!
Step, thump thump!
Step, thump thump!
"Who's there?" I demand, as if some mythical beast will announce its presence.
The wind whispers in my ears and blows frizzy locks of hair into my face. I frantically try and swat them away as shivers run up my spine and I realize...something is very wrong. I hear the dog whimpering again, the sound is just behind the first few trees of the forbidden forest.
So close I can almost touch it.
"Lumos," I whisper, walking into the forest, waving my wand. I feel like i've barely taken five steps but, when I turn around, i'm yards and yards away from where I started.
A twig snaps from somewhere behind me.
"H-hello?" I call out.
"Who's there?" I shout. I hear the dog whining along with a few more growls and grunts.
Footsteps sounding like hooves circle around me for a split second. I take a breathe and prepare for certain doom.
"LAST CHANCE!" I scream, "TELL ME WHO'S THERE OR I'LL HEX YOU INTO OBLIVION!" I wave my wand around wildly.
Again, no response, but a large beastly creature emerges from the shadows. It only takes a single second for me to realize what it is, a werewolf.
"Uhh, nice doggy?" I coo to the creature. It tilts its head to the left and stops stalking towards me.
"Stay, please. Just stay there, I don't want to hurt you," I state sternly.
Turning briskly on my heel I begin to sprint as fast as my legs can carry me. It's no use, not even a moment later the creature pounces on me from the back.
I let out a blood curdling scream at the sensation of jagged teeth biting into my sides. "Help! Please!" I cry.
This is it, this is how I die.
The tragic little life of Cordelia Evans.
'Second best to Lily Evans' will be engraved on my tombstone.
I stop fighting the beast, and just sob as it continues to bite and tear at my flesh.
"I don't want to die," I whisper to myself.
"STUPEFY!" Someone shouts, the werewolf falls over unconscious.
The world starts fading in and out as I do my best to stay awake, stay alive. Thanks to this stranger, it might be much easier. "Focillo," The voice, calm and steady, mutters. It's a mans voice.
My whole body fills with warmth and strong arms lift me off the cold, wet ground bridal style.
My head rest against his chest and I breathe in expensive cologne and sea salt. "I don't want to die," I whisper again, clutching the strangers collar.
"You're not going to die." The sureness in the mans voice is almost enough to convince me myself. How could he possibly know that? Although, he almost sounds like he's mocking me, as if i'm being dramatic.
I kind of wanted to die out of spite for him now.
Bright light floods through my eyelids causing me to screw them shut tighter. It's the light of the heavens isn't it? "Merlin, I am dying,"
"No, that's just the sunshine."
Song: Just like a movie by wallows (linked at top)
Unedited so give me a break if it sucks 😗✌️